Hipster disguised in Staten Island.

A reader from Staten Island noticed a clean and shiny Ford F150 pick-up truck at a red light. Upon inspection, he sees a Q-tip-limbed, scarf-wearing, on purposely styled bed-head hair-do beta male in the driver’s seat. He asks him what the fuck was he doing outside of North Brooklyn in a manly vehicle? The hipster responded by saying it was part of a performance art piece for the U.L.E.B.A.S (Urban Lower East Bushwick Arts Society): he was acting out what it’s like to be an outer-borough working class type. So before he was able to crack this hipster in the jaw the light turned green and the hipster sped away. He was able to snap a picture of the license plate though. “LQQK AT MEEEEEEEEEEE”!!!!!

34 thoughts on “Hipster disguised in Staten Island.

  1. Sad but there is actually a Hipster rush for staten island. If you come off the ferry a turn right onto Richmond Terrace, go a mile and a half turn up Lafayette, they are all in that area looking lost and out of place. The area is close to snug harbor cultural center which is known for community gardens, botanical gardens, art and theater. What a shock! I assume these Hipsters cant afford the other Hipster communities so they figured Staten Island is close enough and cheap enough? Of course they will figure out how to make the jump to Staten Island cool and trendy.

  2. No offense, but the Hipsters can have Staten Island. Us real NYer’s don’t want it.

    • Screw you, buddy, Staten Islanders are the salt of the earth. Don’t forget that many of our cops, firemen and teachers are from Staten Island. Staten Islanders ARE “real” New Yorkers. We just live better than the rest of you because we have the lowest crime and highest home ownership.

  3. Let the Mafia deal with them.

  4. No. that’s too hard to believe…. Please tell me this is a hoax….

  5. Its really sickening to see the fucks outside of BK.. I work in Hunts Point in the Bron and About two weeks ago, while drivng around in the area where I work, I saw from farrrr away (about 5 blocks)about a swarm of 40 fucking people. Since I wsas about 4 blocks away, I thought a”oh its some kids nearby on a field trip” watever….what threw me off was the fuckinpasty asss skin and their scarves and the fucking ipads and iphones in hand. At that point I said to me self ” Where are the speeding semi trucks that always run over people on Randall Ave when u fucking need em!?!!???”. GROSS … They have been slooowwwwlllyyy trying to get into the south Bronx… I’ve even seen advertisements for Condos and “Artist Lofts” in “SoBro” (you can figure out what it stands for) I’ve seen them once or twice get off at E149 street.

    • They infested the old Clocktower piano factory in the South Bronx. They’re nice easy pickings for the residents of the Forrest Houses! :)

    • I got a friend who lives in breezy, says he sees these fucks in rockaway riding bikes and shit by reese park.

  6. This city is fucking done for. The natives might as well move out and regroup when NYC gets to expensive for anybody to live in. A shame and I blame bloomberg and real estate companies for this. Instead of helping the working class they rather use hipsters as a money generating tool to push us out. NYC will be fucking nothing real soon, and the sad part about it that Hipsters only limit themselves to hipsters they don’t try to appreciate the city and its natives.

    • I agree with you completely. Bloomberg started the big fuck you to the city the minute his original congestion pricing plan was struck down.

  7. If this story is true and you’re saying this ducking hipster douchebag was “trying to see what it’s like to be an outer boro working class”……..you mean what’s its like to um HAVE A FUCKING JOB. When has anyone ever actually seen a hipster going to work, aside from their hard day of food farming above Starbucks?

  8. Coming soon:

    Mast Bros. on Staten Island.

  9. How do I get a die hipster.com T shirt. I work in a very yupster part of Brooklyn and would love to promote this website and how feel about these douchebags.

  10. So pretty much no borough is safe. Hey people, it’s no longer just “Brooklyn” it’s all of freaking NYC.

    I swear every time I see these people posting on CD about “where in Brooklyn should I move to” or “Is this area safe for a petite white girl?” I want to yell at them “No! It’s not, stay where the fuck you are and stop infesting our city!”

  11. I heard the hipsters were moving into the ghetto of staten island like St George. I’m convinced all the hipsters will move out to philly or some place all in one shot. Sort of like Seattle in the early 1990′s, they dont stay forever.


  12. Look at this they really think theyre fucking natives and shit

    • Thats Brooklyn for ya.

      • Is that Katherine Hepburn in the blue jacket with the bun on top of its head? Looks like her from the back. From the front, looks like her as she would be now, years after her death and decay. And who the hell calls the J train the “numbero J”? IT’S A LETTER, NOT A NUMBER IDIOT.

    • That guy is a native (Queens).

  13. wouldn’t it be awesome if they simultaneously held hands and leaped from both sides and levels of Verrazano !?

  14. You’d all make fine Nazis. You’re really dedicated to that sort of progress.

    Have any of you noticed that pretty much every player on the Knicks’ sartorial taste leans hipster? What’s up with that?

    I know that change can be hard to deal with. But you people need therapy. I don’t men that in a flip way. Sincerly, this can’t be healthy. Your poor artires…

  15. I don’t know about you but I think you should make a post about this. Try not to throw up

  16. ‘Freegan’???


    Why can’t these arbitars of neu-kewl read some interviews with the conductor of the Philharmonic?
    He and his siblings orphaned in Israel and having to live on trash food as CHILDREN ( read: 6, 7, 8
    years old ) and finally rescued by a Catholic monastery. He gets some education and
    by 17 is working as a mechanic but winds up having a naturally beautiful singing voice.
    His is a one in a million story..a client hears him singing while he’s changing the
    guys tire and sweeps him off to perform on a stage and sets him on the path to a music
    career. He is seperated from his siblings with no idea if they’re alive or dead ( which
    happened, I think, before he worked as a mechanic ). It would be years before seeing them
    again. He’s one of the most upbeat, positive people I’ve heard. Living hand to mouth
    on the street is not a fashion trend. It’s not about convenience, it’s about necessity.

    And dumpster diving’s been around a long time. It’s actually possible to work with the
    business people instead of tearing their trash bags apart and pissing off the garbage
    men in the process. Many grocery stores will and often donate to homeless shelters and
    farms ( to help keep animals fed ). It’s ABSURD that this is being presented as if it’s
    either something new or desirable.

    As for the B&W film…uh, trying to be 60′s art film much?

    Hey! Is that Bob Dylan?

    Oh. Sorry…well, toss in some horror and we’re off to the Warhol films before you know it!

    “Here’s a guy who plays some real crappy music in a movie made by a group of 10 people who think they’re really cool but
    are too tired to write a script but energetic enought to smoke pot and watch arthaus

  17. Pingback: Caught one below “The Line”. « d i e h i p s t e r . c o m

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