Zany Zane is selling Hondas baby!

zanyzanehonda Well look who it is! It’s Zany Zane the filthy fucking beardo doing Honda commercials. Oh the irony! I can only imagine how many pseudo-serious beard stroking moments Zany Zane had - talking about reducing carbon footprints and going green, etc, etc, with other phony environmentalist hipster try-hard scumbag motherfuckers. But now he’s zooming away in a fossil fuel burning machine because money talks.

His line, at 00:53 is: “What about being accepted for who you are?” Awwwww, poor wittle Zany Zane. Is that what Mommy still tells you about your decision to have a flea circus under your chin? Yeah Zane, you’re so unique aren’t you? You grew an attention beard.

 

 

zanyzanehonda2Here he is in another one where he says “[Today is] pretty great!” I love how the caption on the bottom says DO NOT ATTEMPT. Oh you’re such a daring stunt man Zane. Or maybe it’s a warning that means “DO NOT ATTEMPT to be a filthy ramen beard bowl hipster try-hard”. It’s really too bad a truck didn’t side swipe his disgusting bearded fucking face at that moment. Stay Zany, Zane! Don’t give up the fight; a true try-hard never stops saying LOOOOOK AT MEEEEEE!

 

 

 

72 thoughts on “Zany Zane is selling Hondas baby!

  1. This fuckin guy needs to die now. His whole life is wrapped up in that fuckin beard. “What about being accepted for who you are?” he says and then gets an obligatory stroke of his beard in as if we didn’t realize what he was talking about. Fuck this shit already. Any self respecting person who gets that the world is fucked right now would never in a million years sell out by doing a fuckin car commercial. And what a condescending theme that ad has too! These fuckin kidults simply cannot realize that their lifestyles, which are fake, are being parroted back to them by multinationals, whose agenda is to enslave them in a corporatized world, which these hipsters claim they would “never subscribe to, man.”

    • Spot on!

      I remember the day when only the real individuals moved to New York and settled in the Villages or Soho so they could live out their truly weird lifestyles. Usually they were gay or drag queens or butch lesbians. Or they were real artists on a mission who felt they didn’t fit in back home. They were the Beats, the hippies, the flower children, up to and including the Club Kids. They lived in squats and dealt drugs or prostituted themselves for a living. The smarter ones learned to type and temped on Wall Street.

      This fucking bearded fleabag doesn’t work. He lives on his parents and the proceeds from that beard oil he sells. Nothing special about him at all. He doesn’t produce any art of any kind (sorry, using your beard as a ramen bowl doesn’t count).

      That’s what pisses me off about these people. On top of the rents and the trust funds. They produce absolutely FUCKING NOTHING!!! Then they think they’re fucking saving the world or something stupid.

    • Ah, but don’t you know, one reason “it’s pretty great now” is because nobody has to think of doing a commercial as selling out anymore. When I was a kid starting my first bands, we could never imagine WANTING our song to be in a commercial. Now days, that’s what even the “coolest” artists are lookng to score — being in a Honda commercial. Being in a Honda commercial isn’t just somehting you reluctantly agree to do for the money. It is something for which you dream and hope. Getting yourself into a Honda commercial is your reason for making art. Or, rather, “art.”

    • Thank You….i wish we could shave those words into their beards!!

  2. Between holding down the urge of puking your breakfast on your keyboard and possibly punching out your monitor, you should take this for what it is – the hipster advertising “Jumped the Beardo-Shark” moment.

    Yes, we’re *this close* to where advertisements featuring large man-children sporting their filthy lice habitats become a thing of the past as the millisecond attention span of mouth-breathing consumers zooms past the horizon, leaving disappointed artisinal assholes in its wake.

    Zane demonstrates the most precious of all hipster tendencies by being a complete bint-cuntrag who isn’t above selling out. Nicely done, you pipecleaner circus freak! Now let the “normals” get on with their lives while you suck your thumb rocking in the corner wearing a soiled onesie, having exhausted all 15 seconds of your “fame”.

  3. A “FLEA Circus Under Your Chin!!!??” LMFAO!!!! Diehipster, I LOVES ya!!! :-)

  4. Hopefully Zane will get sandwiched by a couple of big rigs and die in an explosion of beard hair and blood

  5. “why can’t they accept us for what we are?”

    Maybe because you’re a 35 year old woman and man wearing fucking underoos in public!

    No wonder this once great economic and industrial powerhouse is rated almost dead last in every economic and social indicator now. People are too busy wearing wonder woman and green lantern costumes in public.

  6. A hipster and his parents money are soon parted.

  7. Actually I have to say the folks at Honda have done their work….for Die Hipster and the rest of society. First by showing how hippocritical these true bohemians are, and tossing them into one of the most over the top commercials I have seen in a while. Proving these aholes are nothing but corporate teet sucking scum who misrepresent everything which is positive in decent folks. Second, it is not easy to pay for a lofty lifestyle working at a coffe shop. Too afford this takes work, which seems to be shutting down across the country. Winding up overseas for cheaper labor. So how is this hippocratic; a generation of foolish ppl who believe the essence to life is to throw caution to the wind when the rest of the nation are tightening their belts up another notch. Ppl are not fooled by the fantasy these folks are trying to portray and the sooner this flash in the pan cultural genre can disappear the sooner we can get back to helping the economy.

  8. I remember when I sent the 31s video to you DH about a week ago (right after you posted the last “Marketing to Hipsters” article with the Denver Broncos shithead), I simply could not believe it…If you stop the 31s video at each frame, you’d LITERALLY have thought the people at Honda read the last 2 years of your Website, and placed in every, single, solitary cliche and stereotype that we all vented about in that goddamn commercial.

    Because the contents in each frame, I can almost guarantee there’s been an article about it here for over 6 months.

    Holy Mackerel, I could not believe it. Apparently, you’re more inspirational than you think, DH…

  9. SEE? Told you there was a new Hipster Honda commercial.

    The beardo looks like a f*cking sheepdog sticking his head out the window like that.

    I love the way they throw in a few people in white lab coats to legitimize these a-holes as normal, serious people.

    And of course there’s the Asian hipster with the Trojan condom ski cap.

  10. Honda must really be feeling the pressure from Toyota if they have to thrown a locally-sourced, organically raised, artisan bone to the beardo community. I guess douchebags buy cars too.

    • What’s scarier is that this isn’t a bone. Right now, Honda is chasing the hipster buck as hard as it can, particularly by sponsoring music festivals and subsidizing the worst “indie” rock bands you can imagine. I can’t find the article, but a couple of years ago, Honda technically became one of the bigger indie rock labels because of the number of bands it was subsidizing, all with the idea of creating the next Nirvana or Arcade Fire and owning every last thing the band ever grunted out. That sounds horrible to us, but that’s an ad man’s wet dream: instead of having to fight for rights to currently popular songs, or trying to bribe a band into making ad jingles, they can now come in and say “I don’t give a flying fuck if you don’t want to do a song about the wonders of oil spills. You’ll either do one, or you’ll pay back every fucking penny you’ve already blown on beard oil and paternity suits.”

      • Each and every mainstream car manufacturer is chasing hipsters. The Ford Mustang used to be a real man’s car, but the new model is being marketed to the finger painting crowd (see an earlier post on this site). Other brands show hyper-pussified ads and offer options like in-car wifi and such nonsense to appeal to the so-called millennials. Pretty much the only vehicles left with a pair of balls are pickups.

        I can see the logic – if you want to plan for the next decade, for when the boomer generation starts to fade, you have to hope those younger boys and girls will become customers.

        Too bad though that those kids still won’t give a flying fuck about cars and will rather use Uber or some sharing app or whatever stupid shit. When I was a child, we would get all excited about Corvettes and Porsches and Ferraris, I guess all that doesn’t exist anymore.

        • Unlike truck ads you’ll never see hipster car commercials show anyone actually working. I wanna see one where some bearded jackass driving his clapped out Carmen Ghia down the BQE with a mattress and penny farthing strapped to the roof.

          What’s worse is that image overrides practicality. You need a pick up truck? Buy a broken down classic held together with baling wire that breaks down every thirty feet. Need something economical? Buy a rusted out VW that costs more in repairs per month than a new car payment? Because part of the fun of owning a piece of shit car is the ensuing zaniness when you break down in the desert and take selfies before dying from dehydration.

          Oh – need a new car? 4 options – Smart car (*giggle*), Prius, Fiat or Mini-Cooper – all of which are overpriced and have worse fuel mileage than a econo box Chevy or Toyota.

          Fuckin’- a they make me wanna puke

      • Remember the douchebags from the credit score commercials? One poster here said something that struck a nerve. Normal, hardworking people who have to clip coupons and watch every penny are sick of seeing these prancing devil-may-care snot rags throw money away.

        Yesterday I was walking around a nearby high end shopping center (you know the kind…they look like a small town) when I passed by a sushi restaurant. Remembering that I had a 25 dollar gift card for the place burning a hole in my wallet, I went in for lunch.

        Now this is place excellent..but it isn’t cheap – and 25 bucks just might be enough to fill you up.

        The table next to me was infested with two Zacks and their cankle spaniels. all the usual hipster cues were there, ski caps, scarves, trucker hats, tats, etc.

        They ordered enough food for an army – and barely ate anything. What’s worse they started playing with their food and using their chopsticks as goal posts. Then they started throwing it around.

        Meanwhile, the only way I could splurge on 25 bucks worth of sushi is to use a gift card.

  11. This commercial really is offensive not just for the fucking beard tard but also for what it is saying: that we really should not worry about how fucked up things are, we still have fast cars, selfies, and so much mindless hipster crap to keep us mindless and not question why we are screwed. Just be happy. It is a great try at advertising mind control.

  12. Look at the bright side to all of this. In another twenty years, all of these twits are going to be out on the street or in drone jobs, frantically cornering everyone they can to tell them about how they were in this Rilly KEWL ad back when they were in their thirties. Unlike the “where are they now?” curiosity concerning actual kids in ads, they’re going to find that nobody cares, either in twenty years or in twenty hours after the ad campaign ended. Or to put it another way, you haven’t seen Pomplamoose doing another one of those obnoxious Christmas car ads in a few years, now have you?

    • You must be reading my mind. I had almost totally forgot about Poplamoose until that video brought the nightmare back to me.
      That would be a great idea for a new category on this site: Where are they Now?
      Let’s go back 5 years to when this site first started and list all the names of people who were featured. Then research them to see if their trust funds are still running. I’ll bet at least half of them are back in Mom’s basement and a good number of them are hipster beating survivors (who have no momentos of their “youth” since their iShit was stolen). How many are now homeless, dead or in prison for Woody Allen style bank robberies?
      It shouldn’t be too hard to find out. Just see when their blog postings stopped.

      Pomplamoose would be a good start.
      Is Medicinal Drew still married?
      Is that window house still standing?
      Is the Painter of Nothing still painting?

      Give me time, I will think of more.

    • Wtf is pomplamoose?

      • they’re a very talented musical duo…talented, unlike posters here, I bet.

        • Oh so they are talentless fucktards that cater to wussy girly men that think mastering masturbation is art. I’m going out on a limb when I tell you’re effeminate panty wearing ass that unlike Led Zeppelin still rocking after 40 years the pimple mouse will be remembered as well as the old guy that died in a hospital ER.

          • pampermoose were/are a nauseating couple who recorded other people’s famous songs in the dude’s parent’s house and got temporarily famous themselves for doing it. They played all the instruments which included lots of cute tinkly instruments. Worse, they filmed every step of the procedure so that we could see how great it is to be doing what you love. Oh, look, he’s about to go “plink” on his adorable old slightly-out-tune piano.

        • Talented? What on Earth is talented about them?

          • Hipsters idea of talent is someone who is ironic and annoying

          • I think their idea of talented is anybody who has even the slightest bit of fame or gets any attention. Sort of like the people who will cite album sales and how much money so and so makes to prove they’re a “great artist”…. only about a thousand times sadder than that.

      • Here are these highly talented hipsturds.

        • What a fucking nightmare Reminds me of all those losers that appear on shows like Wife Swap for ten seconds of airtime they hope brings then fame. Of course they only succeed on looking like the in talented assswipes they actually are

    • Thanks, Leroy….that is a good forecast for the future of these entitled morons.

  13. Maybe Zane will use the money he made shooting this ad to buy himself a quality beard trimmer?

    Or better yet, maybe Honda talked him into working for free, for the exposure, maaaaan.

  14. but he’s not selling out. The people at Honda were actually really cool because they like totally let him be himself and like were embracing who Zane really is and not being controlling like the other straight jobs Zane had somehow landed and lost on the first day for being so “who he is”. Thanks a fucking lot Honda.

  15. This commercial made me want to set myself on fire.

    • Jesus H. Fucking Christ, did that woman come from a house of servants? Does the butler wipe her ass? Does she have her own French chef who cooks nothing but organic kale for her breakfast?

      On East 25th Street, near Second Avenue, a studio in the back of a small 1920 walk-up building with a sleeping loft was available for $1,950 a month. Ms. Csordas-Jenkins, an aspiring actress who is studying theater and dramatic literature, liked it but thought it was too far from campus.

      You’re in MAN-FUCKING-HATTAN BITCH!!! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU COMPLAINING ABOUT????

      Honey, if you lived in some of the shitholes I lived in in the over the years, you would probably have died. Sleep disorder. Yeah, I have that too sometimes. You know what my cure is FUCKING BEER!!! Never fails. (And not PBR either).

      • Haha, right on.

        That stupid bint reminds me of this chick I knew, where upon seeing my bed with no pillows (I had put them elsewhere while cleaning) asked me – “Which side do you put your feet on, I can’t lie down where you put your feet.”

        I was taken aback by this, since I bathe daily and wasn’t sporting cheetos-toes, but since I wanted some pussy I just indicated where I laid my head to rest, thinking she was a complete and utter bitch.

        I love how the bright-eyed coed in this story can’t be bothered to walk a few blocks, that’s so *precious*.

    • says all you need to know in the article — “For a place that was quiet, bright and within walking distance of N.Y.U., her budget, *funded by her parents*, was $1,850 a month.” oh, baby…

      • When I was her age I would have killed for someone to subsidize my apartment in Manhattan. It wouldn’t have bothered me where it was if it was downtown. I remember when if I was picking up a girl in a Manhattan bar and said I lived in Queens, it was Kryptonite. If you didn’t live in Manhattan in those days you weren’t cool.
        How times have changed.

    • 2,100 bucks for 240 Square-Feet…That’s half of my Garage.

      Holy Mackerel…

  16. Fuckin’ today mentality is killing mug brains.

  17. Forgive me also for being off topic here, but I took the time to read about that silly little cyclist in Vancouver. I also read some of the comments from another article about the incident, and one commenter said that they have the number of the motorist’s car and that they were going to find out who he is. ‘Sounds somewhat ominous, in my opinion.

    I have also ridden my bicycle around London, either on errands or occasionally to work. It’s weird, but I have never experienced any of the difficulties that the hipsters who consider themselves to be morally superior for riding a bicycle seem to experience on a daily basis.

    Indeed, I wonder if I’m doing something wrong.

    I am aware that there are other types of vehicles on the road and that, just like any other operator, one must learn to share it and work with whatever and whoever else might be around them. Perhaps that’s my first problem right there?

    I stay on the far-left side of the road (remember that UK traffic is on the left), I obey traffic laws and I respect motorists as they are also entitled to be the road. I certainly don’t provoke them or attempt to damage their vehicles. And, for some strange reason, none of them have ever bothered me.

    It’s worth mentioning, by the way, that traffic in London is no different from any other major metropolis in that it can be quite hectic. You need to be alert, especially when riding a bicycle in this town during peak hours. So, instead of listening to music from an iToy by bands that nobody has ever heard of or checking out that really cool website that mainstream people just wouldn’t understand, I actually focus and pay attention at those times to what is in front of and around myself.

    It’s crazy, I know.

    I also give a wide berth to any heavy vehicles on the road, such as lorries and busses, for they may not have the same type of vision as a regular motorist. I know it sounds stupid, but I hang back if one of them gets too close to me or if we are approaching a junction.

    Maybe I have the wrong attitude by not seeing myself as morally superior for riding a bicycle, but rather just another user of the road in a different type of vehicle who is nonetheless obligated to behave like a civilised human being?

    Could it be the fact that don’t have a fixed gear bicycle for which I paid an absolute rip-off premium, but rather a second-hand bicycle that cost me a little less than £100?

    • I’ve been cycling in New York for almost 20 years. I totally agree with everything you say. I treat all other vehicles with respect because every other vehicle is bigger than me and if I get run over I’m dead. Like you, I’ve never had an accident ever. I don’t know how these hipsters can be so stupid.

      Ever see this movie? Bunch of middle-aged hipsters living on their parents’ dime, acting like they’re some kind of revolution.

      • Not for the media? Then why are they advertising themselves on You Tube and likely already thinking about a documentary film for Sundance?

        • The entire movie used to be on youtoob. The hipster cliches in it are like that Honda commercial on steroids.
          There’s one guy who keeps telling his parents how they won’t let him in the gang and his mom tells us how he’s the most creative person she knows. He’s somewhere north of 30. The heroin addict has to be the most phony thing I’ve ever seen in a “documentary”. His girlfriend fucks off to England and calls him after 3 months – while the camera is running and the mood lighting is all set up.

          And that’s only after watching about half the movie. If I watched any more I would have to buy a new monitor after being bailed out of prison.

      • I have nothing against gay people, but this is the gayest shit I’ve ever seen. In other news who else would like to see the Dirty 1′s bike club run into this pseudo tough guys faggots?

  18. Zany Zane, lives is SF, where I live, and where this “ironic” car commercial was filmed. Clearly, Zany Zane has an agent and wants to be famous, um, for his beard! That is his shtick, his gimmick. He is milking that beard for all its worth to get his 15 minutes of facial hair fame. Talk about over kill. Let’s face it, its all he has. BTW, if you want to see the damage hipsters do to entire neighborhoods, let alone entire cities, then take a trip here and see it in all its bearded, tattooed, body length scarf, woolen hat, converse hat wearing glory. A studio apartment is now averaging over $2,000 a month and that is in a marginal area, where they are taking over as urban pioneers!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Things are so bad here, where I was born and raised that I am thinking of getting out, but is anywhere safe, nope. What we need here in SF is a big ol earthquake so they all going running back to terra firma in Idaho, Wisconsin, well, you get the picture.

    • Well I guess every cloud has a silver lining. By the time San Andreas cracks up, the whole place will be so hipster infested there’ll be no damage done.

    • Don’t forget to mention go running back to other parts of the “Bay Area”, as the “Bay Area” and West Coast produces just as many hipsters as the Midwest. Really all of the West Coast does. Canada too.

      If you really want to deal with hipsters then you have to be honest with yourself about where they come from. The “tolerant” Bay Area is ground zero for hipsterism, along with SoCal and the Pacific Northwest.

      • Right now in SF, there is a big backlash about the overwhelming gentrification and displacement of people and the rising rents, and the huge amounts of high end housing being built. Its social and economic cleansing! Just like what is happening in NYC so I can identify with this site. The big joke now is, the hipsters who are helping, along with the constant flow of tech workers from out of state into SF, are beginning to actually protest the high cost of living in order to show they are really hip to the plight of those who are being priced out. These interlopers simply don’t or wont get it that THEY are the ones creating the problem and the very reason they move to SF they are destroying!

  19. If a hipster does a commercial, it’s okay because they are just being ironic. If anyone else does a commercial, they are a corporate whore. Nice how that works out.

    • Remember the flak Moby got when he let Nordstrom use his song “Porcelain” in their commercial? I remember Bruce Springsteen giving him a piece of his mind on TV.

      (Personally, I wasn’t too fazed it. This was 1999/2000 or thereabouts and I never figured Moby to be particularly anti-establishment. Besides, the money would help him develop other music without worrying about where his next check was coming from).

  20. Good thing I drive a Nissan and I’ll drive it right into these pasghetti legged useless drains of society

    • That’s not really the impression I got from reading that. Rather, I saw a normal Portland native lamenting how the hipster invasion is ruining his hometown, and frankly, it was kind of refreshing to see.

    • Nope…the writer was criticizing the preciousness of Portland and telling the history of the city – he’s probably on our side.

  21. I’m surprised ALL companies aren’t trying to reach the hipster demographic. Doesn’t everybody want to have money to burn without having to work?

  22. This butt monkey made an appearance on Cougar Town. Now he’s bragging to all his dickbag friend on Flyoverlandia that he made it!

  23. Can’t we just accept him for who he is? People with beards have a very hard life and struggle to make it. People with beards today are treated like they are different. They have it worse than the Jews did during the holocaust. I feel so bad for him having to go through his struggle of being different. Nah I’m just kidding. I hope he gets strangled with his own beard while having Mast Bros. chocolate bars shoved up his creative zany butthole.

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