It seems that the NY Times has gone full circle with its ‘discovery of Brooklyn’ tour and ended up back in the costume wearing, red bearded Mast Bros’ chocolate factory. God, I wish I could fire those two scare-crowish, pseudo-artisanal hipsters out of a cannon back to their Iowan cornfield for good. Well, this Thursday I’m going to ask you all for a big favor. The Times is doing a live interview on their Dining Page with the Mast Brothers about their new recipe book where they teach us how to make artisanal chocolate milk. Viewers are allowed to tweet questions for the Mast Bros. to @nytdining.
Today’s NY Times article is where tomorrow’s Q & A with the out-of-place Mast Bros. of Nieuw Breukelen will be; please make sure to help me disrupt these pieces of shit. This is the link to see today’s article and tomorrow’s live interview as well: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/22/dining/discussing-chocolate-with-the-mast-brothers.html?src=dayp&_r=1&
This is where I need your help; if you don’t already have a Twitter account, it takes two minutes to open one on a computer. Then we will bombard the @nytdining account with ridiculous questions tomorrow at 2pm sharp in hopes of disrupting this very, very important red beard recipe webinar. Once you have an account, you can do this on a Twitter app on a smart phone or computer depending on what you do, since you’ll probably be at work at 2pm unlike the average funemployed hipster. So set an alarm on your phone for 2pm tomorrow, Thursday, Oct 24th and help me out.
Here are some questions I’ve come up with to use, but feel free to say what ever you want; and make sure you do not stop bombarding for a good 20 minutes, even if you keep repeating them over and over:
People have found red beard hairs in your $10 chocolate bars. Why don’t you wear beard nets?
Is it required to be an Amish looking, ax sharpening, red bearded hipster to be a chocolate maker?
What gentrification blog did you read that made you move from an Iowan cornfield to working class Brooklyn?
City data shows for every 10 overpriced disgusting bars of shit you make – a normal non-hip NY family gets displaced. Thoughts on that?
How many gentrification allowance checks from your folks did you save up to open your business?
How did you manage to unload those heavy sacks of cacao beans off the three sailed schooner with your Olive Oyl physiques?
Remember, here is the link you need to go to tomorrow, Thursday, October 24th, @ 2PM: http://www.nytimes.com/2013/10/22/dining/discussing-chocolate-with-the-mast-brothers.html?src=dayp&_r=1&
And you can reach me on Twitter @HipsterBeatings