Dear Fellow Brookynites, New Yorkers & hipster haters abroad:
This will be the last post – most likely forever. It’s been a pleasure exposing these fucking frauds over the years while making you laugh and helping you vent. The truth is, I simply can’t take these people anymore – to the point that I don’t even want to write about them on a regular basis. It’s too depressing, nauseating, and aggravating. It’s bad enough seeing them when I leave my neighborhood or reading about them in the media.
These self-absorbed, attention-starved, talentless, pseudo-creative, wanna-be city types have sterilized, homogenized and erased any real culture in parts of Brooklyn beyond belief and I don’t see it getting any better anytime soon. Sure, many of these hipsters have read my site and felt the pain of being exposed as out-of-place annoyances – but all they need to do to feel better is run around the corner to the nearest gentrification latte shop or quirky food joint or bike lane or gallery or kickball field and see mirror images of their “unique” selves. Then they temporarily forget about us obstructive natives who don’t understand city living the way a bearded guy named Reid or Caleb does who arrived here from Minnesota or Oregon with a trust fund and a dream 3 years and 2 months ago.
These culdesacian culture vultures have basically destroyed art and music just about to the point of irreparable. The price of such simple things like rent, coffee and certain foods have doubled and tripled because of these zany cockrag hipster fucks who glorify everything as if they discovered it. These smug, parentally funded interloping idiots pay $11 for two poached eggs and a leaf of fucking kale – and not on Park Avenue but in working class Brooklyn neighborhoods!!! Pizza, pudding, tacos and cupcakes are now earth-shattering, tastier than ever items (according to hipster wannabe foodies who have infiltrated the media) because some sickly-looking, heavily-tattooed, garage rock band failure who arrives to work via pogo stick or unicycle makes it?
And I guess you can say that these hipsters truly are the masters of irony; their claim is to: keep it real; organic; local; small-time; underground; and non-commercial, YET – Brooklyn has become one of the biggest fucking commercials of the country if not the world thanks to these transient try-hards! Isn’t it IRONIC??????
So although, wishfully, in the back of my head I thought this website would somewhat prevent the spread of hipsters into southern parts of Brooklyn, they’ve managed to ooze a little below Prospect Park around the Ditmas/Cortelyou area. I really don’t think they’ll be going much further south and if so, it’ll be a long, long, long time before they thoroughly take over places like Dyker, Bay Ridge, Borough Park, Bensonhurst, Gravesend, Sheepshead Bay, and Marine Park.
I’m going to keep the site up for an indefinite amount of time for people to read through older posts but comments will be closed. I’ll still be commenting/bashing here and there on hipster run sites and on other media (that don’t ban me or erase my comments) that love to glorify these assholes. And please feel free to share things like pictures, videos, articles and your thoughts with me via my email which is DIEHIPSTERS (at) GMAIL (dot) COM or on Twitter which is @hipsterbeatings. I look forward to hearing from you. Thank you all for reading and supporting over the years and a MASSIVE FUCK YOU to the hipsters!
Stay strong [real] Brooklyn!