Bike lanes are so 2012; this car is so Brooklyn 2013 – YAH!

I know hipsters love riding around on their rickety old bicycles, fixed gear Penny Farthings, and 12 foot long boards – but this car ad may change everything. Act now Caleb!

Link : Craigslist Hipster Car Ad

It’s time to hit the trust fund. For a mere $18,000, you could be driving the most authentic, urban-chic whip in town. All your friends will know you have been through interesting hardships when they see the mangled wiring reaching out of your empty dashboard. Your Brooklyn cred will go unchallenged when your passengers have to push shattered glass off their seats to get a lift to their loft apartments.

Of course there is no stereo anymore, so you can listen to all your newly emerging, obscure, independent music right from your MacBook on the way to your favorite foreign film cinema. How convenient is that? Everyone will know how fervently you reject consumerism when you never have to lock your doors, because everything worth stealing has already been stolen, and the most expensive window is already broken. Your vintage combat boots and thrift store plaid shirts will look even cooler when they are accentuated by cigarette burns that cover every inch of the upholstery. You can tell people they all came from American Spirit cigarettes.

You know you are too cool for the lame “mainstream” brand-new cars available in this price range. This 15-year old Pontiac has a burnt orange finish that nobody has ever seen before or even wanted! The exterior is marred by so many scratches and minor accident damage that no one else will ever have anything like it again. Think of how ironic it will be when your tailpipe is held on by a shoestring. A Doc Martin shoestring. Plus, there is so much dirt in the trunk you can get started on your own traveling organic garden.

So put down your micro-brew, button up your skinny jeans and head over to Bushwick. Get this car before everyone figures out how cool it really is.

ps – I am including a picture of the guy who stole your stereo, so if you see him, you can thank him for the unique appearance he brought to the interior.

Location: Brooklyn

87 thoughts on “Bike lanes are so 2012; this car is so Brooklyn 2013 – YAH!

  1. Suh-weeeet!

  2. “ps – I am including a picture of the guy who stole your stereo, so if you see him, you can thank him for the unique appearance he brought to the interior.”

    Was that theft before or after he took a 30-pound shit on the driver’s seat and a good runny squirt in the glove compartment?

  3. Classic!!!!!
    Unfortunately, the car still has it’s heater controls (see the stereo hole picture).
    Fortunately, the heater doesn’t work. Except during July and August.

    • Don’t worry about the heat. By the look of that dash, I see that this is a Ford, probably a Tempo. The heater core probably went tits up a long time before the other “improvements” were made. This car is now kewel all year long. Yah!

      • And they can put their turntable in the cavity. Or another cavity, for that matter.

      • Maybe a car rooftop garden. He can raise bees in the stereo cavity! Think of the possibilities! Wherever you go you’ll be locally sourced.

  4. What a set of balls!

    The perfect companion piece to the video footage out of DC of the passerby calmly lifting Caleb’s ipad while he flirted in some kewl cafe.

    • That grizzly man camping equipment reminds me of the crap they sell in Eddie Bauer. I guess you’ll need it for your camping trip at the end of Mom’s back garden, .
      Hey, Meghan and Mollie can move in once they get priced out of Willyworld and Pornland by all the hipsters moving in.

      • Hah! That reminds me of the one time my Precious Snowflake nephew camped out with a couple of his precious snowflake friends in Grandpa’s yard. They were on their summer off from Freshman year in college, they were too cool to work, so they had nothing else to do.

        The only place any of them had ever camped before was in their parents’ living rooms, so this was going to be The Ultimate Camping Trip. They were going to drink and get high relatively unsupervised for the first time in their sheltered lives. Snowflake Mommy stayed in the house in case they ran into any trouble out in the yard.

        They packed up all this expensive camping gear and Snowflake Dad drove them in his massive SUV to Grandpa’s. Dad had to help them put up the tent, although I don’t know how much help he was. He’s pretty clueless on outdoors things like tents and tarps.

        According to Helicopter Snowflake Mommy/kidult supervisor, it started raining at around 9pm, and all the Snowflakes went back into the house and stayed there for the rest of the night. Precious Snowflake Camping Trip=epic fail.

      • Expedition gear for the discerning crusty.

    • LOL $75 for a camping chair. They cost $4 at K-Mart

    • What a bunch of shitty, overpriced shit. Marketed to rubes who have never been outside. Don’t forget the “vintage” Boy Scout patch ripoffs their hawking.

  5. http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/business-20663550

    Once again, the BBC decides to wade into the student loan dilemma. Note what the first bimbo put herself $150,000 (£93,500; 116,300 euros) of student debt for.

    Meanwhile, I’ve got no debt and enough Java/Oracle/Unix programming work to keep me busy until the Sun turns into a black hole.

    • Real smart people this bunch… you are a fucking adult, how do you not know of any options before making such an endeavor? Hell, during orientation at CUNY (JJAY) they told us our financial aid options and suggested everyone get a non-loan grant (federal) they can. Loans should always be a last resort. Stupid people deserve to be stuck with such a burden instead of us hard working responsible people picking up their damn tabs.

      The first idiot should have chosen something more useful if she was pursuing a phd or at least wait a while before going for one. Finish your BS/ BA, work a little or enter a career, make time for graduate school if you are so inclined, work some more, save up then see your options for a phd. FFS…

      Whatever happened to researching demand in various fields before fully committing to it? Those after graduation salaries are best case scenarios not the default or even average. Hell, what’s wrong with attending a public university?

      • should’ve been: “non-loan grant if they can”

      • Students are behaving irresponsibly when they borrow $100K, universities are behaving irresponsibly when they lie about the students’ chances of being employed with that degree, and banks are behaving irresponsibly when they lend that money. You can pin it on only one of the parties according to your political beliefs, but in the end, all are irresponsible. End of story.

        • YEP^, there are many people/organizations in the chain of making this crap happen, and not every HS student makes every perfect choice.

          Success in a career has more to do with who you know, and how many others can do it, regardless of degree. If these liberal arts students decided to program, it would not be such a great job. It’s so good because not many can do it (until that works gets farmed out to Indian and Chinese kids, but I digress).. My job is similar- small pool of people that can actually do the job right. But, the economy changes quickly, and mercilessly, so even if you picked right once, there is no guarantee of future performance.

          No education ought to cost 150k anyway, thats insane. We want educated citizens, but not enough to fund college educations, or at the minimum, just the useful stuff.

        • They should be enough of an adult to do the research and not fall for some BS. Yeah the universities can be a bit scummy but know what you’re getting into.

          • I’m not talking about marketing here, which is what I assume you’re referring to. I’m talking about the students who, once in undergrad, are encouraged to continue on with PhDs. I started undergrad as an English major. I just thought of it as a subject to choose as a major before moving on to a career, not as a career path. Early on during undergrad, several professors encouraged me to get on a Master’s/PhD track in the subject.

            Junior year, one English professor said to us, “I know I’m not supposed to tell you this, but what the hell…” and he drew a chart showing how much we’d spend to get a PhD in the subject and how much we’d realistically make when we were done. I knew at that moment that I’d never continue to get a PhD, and that every other professor was sugarcoating it.

            The scary thing is, I know people a lot like me who went to universities where EVERY professor sugarcoated it. I’d like to think that, if I hadn’t had that one professor, I still would have figured out on my own that the Humanities PhD was a racket. But I’ll never know. It could be that, if he hadn’t given our class that speech, I’d still be spending money on an outdated, impractical degree instead of actually making money at a job.

      • “Ms McDevitt has a career that she loves – lecturing, writing and speaking on human sexuality – but as she did not receive any financial aid, she took out private loans to pay for her degrees, leaving her with monthly payments of $1,600.” Hell, she should easily clear $1600 a month as a PHD hooker…

      • There are some careers that are, and have been for a while now, absolutely meaningless in terms of actual employment without a PhD. Quitting after the Bach to work for awhile, iow, won’t work because they can’t get work with the Bach. Psychology majors comes to mind. Someone in that endeavor, or social work of some kind, MUST get a Master’s or greater to be gainfully employed above minimum wage. Most of the internships are just barely at that. Even when a B.S. in Comp Sci could get you pretty damned far, pretty quickly – or at least start at a killer salary – those are faded era’s. A Bach is practically a high school diploma, in real value, at this point. It’s kind of odd because the people who make the most money upfront on such an academic path are, of course, the colleges themselves. It’s nieve as hell to view them as anything but businesses and the student is the primary and consistent vessel of profit. It damn sure doesn’t hurt the college to ‘steer’ students into vocations that take twelve years to finish from start to finish and they get to blabber about having a large percentage of PhD’s. The value of degrees, that are obligatory versus necessary many times ( the primary people interested in numbers of ‘degrees’ in a company are, ultimately, investors…not the people actually doing the work ), globally, are flattening and that’s not going to stop any time soon.

    • Then there’s this:

      http://gothamist.com/2012/12/03/11_students_protesting_tuition_barr.php

      Now – there’s no doubt in my mind that the folks who are protesting and generally disrupting the daily lives of the students are those involved in the ART ART ART ARTS.

      Because I can’t imagine anyone who was brilliant enough to get into any of Cooper Unions
      hard sciences curriculums would have the time to bitch given the difficulty of their majors.

      Keep Cooper Union free? Hey it worked for a long time but many institutions that were once free now charge tuition. UCLA comes to mind.

      And maybe …just maybe…the engineering students…the chemistry majors, etc. are grateful to have gotten a free ride up until now. I can’t imagine tuition going from zero to 30K a year.

      If I were the dean I would make the not-so hard decision to raise tution to somewhere between zero and the highest liberal arts education in NYC and keep the science curriculums free.

      Again – people like art. People do not NEED art. NY needs businesses dealing in the hard sciences…manufacturing…r&D (and NOT the Twitter kind) not some fingerpainting ART ART ARTIST from Cooper Union.

      • “Sobel, who studies performance art and printmaking…”
        Nuff said…

      • “People do not NEED art”
        But Art, the hat pin armed, Dinty Moore lumberjack shirt wearing Play-Doh sculpting major, NEEDS to find the scratch to pay for his final three freshman years at Columbia. Art’s father decided that buying that original, handcrafted, vintage Shelby 427 S/C Cobra was a more responsible use of his IRA. Art is considering selling his vital organs to pay for next month’s $3495 rent for that awesome and sooooooooooo kewel half studio down the block from Urban_Infidel’s much less expensive and bigger apartment.

        • Reminds me the only snippet of HBO’s “Girls” I’ve ever seen. Lena Dunham AKA The The Eggplant in Stretchpants, is taken out to dinner by her visiting parents. While she’s stuffing her face like a concentration camp refugee at an all you can eat buffet, her ‘rents break the news to her that they have supported her long enough and it’s time for her to get a paying job because they want to buy a house on the lake.

          I worked with a guy who did the car thing. Saved up for his kids college tuition. When he asked the kid what he wanted to be he said “Anthropology”, dad handed him the loan and grant forms and blew his school money on a vintage GTO convertible.

      • The thing is, was this not declared “The Information Age” in the 90′s? The salvation of intellect via the Big Triple W? I believe it was heralded as exactly that. But what do people pursue? Celebrity gossip and porn. They could tour the Louvre virtually, ‘see’ the world, learn languages by Skyping with people in other countries, and take FREE CLASSES from MIT and Harvard. The problem for people, in part I think, is that they know they can do these things but are raised to believe the ONLY value in education is how reduced it is in terms of dollars. That is difficult as hell to ignore or not think about, but it was never the original intent of ‘higher learning’. Not from the Enlightenment standpoint. IF, perhaps, a potential candidate could actually be valued by a company for taking the time – their own time – to actually go through those free courses from esteemed universities, maybe more people would do so. All the indicators are there that we’re definitely moving to the decay of the physical space of campuses and they’ll probably be used as storage facilities in the future as R&D can be, and is, sim’d out by non-collocated teams. Maybe the whole education construct as we’ve known it is just morphing so rapidly and we’re in that interim period of an era that tends to result in a lot of insecurity because *during the transition* period, nobody’s totally sure what the next phase will actually ‘look’ like. Man I really need to cut my coffee out earlier in the day.

    • That was an awesome read.

    • I hate the site but occasionally they nail it. Bacon indeed.

      • My husband and I did a favor for our neighbors down the hall, and to thank us they gave (regifted) a bag of chocolate-covered bacon. It was disgusting. I love chocolate, I like bacon, but they do NOT belong together.
        The neighbors, BTW, are very cool young ladies, but many of their friends are hipsters. We went to one of their parties and had more fun talking with the neighbor’s mom than their creepy hipster friends.

  6. I see they left the pack of American Spirit cigarettes as a free gift with purchase. The interior of this car is soooo authentic, real authentic free range organic naugahyde! And who needs a car stereo anymore when you can plug in your MacBook and be in the scene with your Independent Minimalist Techno DJ skills while you drive to the kewel ironic bowling alley? It’s worth every penny, the $18,000 price tag is non-negotiable!

  7. Here’s something funny. I was looking for a programming example for writing Android apps with text. You know that “Lorum Ipsum” text that’s sometimes used for dummy text? Well, some developer has a sense of humor obviously reads this site. Here’s the “Hipstum Ipsum” he used. Find the hidden references.

    “Article One\n\nExcepteur pour-over occaecat squid biodiesel umami gastropub, nulla laborum salvia dreamcatcher fanny pack. Ullamco culpa retro ea, trust fund excepteur eiusmod direct trade banksy nisi lo-fi cray messenger bag. Nesciunt esse carles selvage put a bird on it gluten-free, wes anderson ut trust fund twee occupy viral. Laboris small batch scenester pork belly, leggings ut farm-to-table aliquip yr nostrud iphone viral next level. Craft beer dreamcatcher pinterest truffaut ethnic, authentic brunch. Esse single-origin coffee banksy do next level tempor. Velit synth dreamcatcher, magna shoreditch in american apparel messenger bag narwhal PBR ennui farm-to-table.”,
    “Article Two\n\nVinyl williamsburg non velit, master cleanse four loko banh mi. Enim kogi keytar trust fund pop-up portland gentrify. Non ea typewriter dolore deserunt Austin. Ad magna ethical kogi mixtape next level. Aliqua pork belly thundercats, ut pop-up tattooed dreamcatcher kogi accusamus photo booth irony portland. Semiotics brunch ut locavore irure, enim etsy laborum stumptown carles gentrify post-ironic cray. Butcher 3 wolf moon blog synth, vegan carles odd future.”

    • The iconic Portland crook was nabbed by police on Friday when he fled his latest heist on bicycle

      On a bike. Like, yah, the preferred mode of transportation for neckbeard Willie Sutton wannabes. What a fucking stooge.

      • That’s just like the crying dickweed who made all of the mugshot sites last week, who was slicing car tires in Portland. He also fled the scene on a bike, and apparently assumed that he was invincible because he was on that bike. Judging by his arrest photo, he was less scared of being thrown in prison than in Daddy cutting him off.

        • I worked in bank security at one time. These Woody Allen type robberies happen more often than you think. (The banks have an agreement with the press not to report them). Usually the perp pulls out a gun, doesn’t actually point it at anyone, has no accomplices, gets filmed by the security camera and gets away with less than $400. (Actual full-scale robberies like in the movies are extremely rare, if they happen at all). The really surprising bit is how long it takes the cops to catch these guys but they always get caught in the end.

          As for getting away on a fixie, I’d sooner walk away. It’s quicker.

    • What an idiot! First for robbing in the first place, and second for not having the sense to plastic up his face or disguise himself beyond one of those stupid toboggins with a brim, semi-hair hats.

      And the next time some knucklehead says there’s no such as ‘hipsters’, the fact that the salon guys title that URL the way they did ought to make it pretty clear that DH isn’t the only one out there aware of fucking hipsters.

  8. They’re still stealing car stereos? GM started putting codes in the innards 20 years ago so they’d be useless if you didn’t have the gizmo to reprogram them.

    • The first one is hilarious, DH could have written it! and the pic, how artistic! LOL

      The second one is gonna have trouble getting a hipster without smoking, drinking, or drugs. Unless one needs a new mommy cuz their trust fund ran dry. Shes not a hipster, shes just a normal dork trying to fit in. She would do better to drop the creative crap.

    • Wow, they just get right to the freaking point, don’t they? Yeesh.

      The first one, though, should’ve just said,”I’m so stupid I purposely stand out in the dark on stormy nights. I need someone to get electrocuted with. It will be SO authentic and quirky a la Ben Jah Min Franklin. Remember him? Kites and stuff? Kewl.”

    • The first one’s deleted, but the second one’s really sad. I kinda feel sorry for her.

  9. P.oor
    O.ld
    N.igga
    T.hinks
    I.t’s
    A.
    C.adillac

  10. OK. So as some of you may know, I’ve been unemployed now for 5 weeks. It sucks…I’m trying to enhance my skills but the State of NJ will only pay for nursing and CDL licenses. I could use some MAsterCAM and Advanced SolidWorks training.

    The worst part of being unemployed is not the job hunting – other than the clueless cyborgs who call based on a key word on your resume – is the worthless pond scum who call with jobs with fly-by night insurance and investment companies.

    But last Friday was the best. Here’s a slightly (wink wink) altered version.

    My brother-in-law calls me up and says he might have a lead for me via a friend. The job in question was with “an innovative award winning design firm in NYC”. They were in need of a seasoned, hands on Mechanical Designer on a contract basis. My BIL sent my resume to him and this guy practically creamed himself over it. He felt I was the perfect candidate.

    I tell my BIL I’ll meet him on Friday since I had to drive up to help him with some home repairs,

    Friday rolls around and I’m in Starbucks around 4PM, waiting for this guy. In walks this “guy” in his late 20′s – wearing the uniform and carrying a backpack.

    My shoulders slump. Everyone here knows the feeling of disappointment when someone raises your hopes of obtaining gainful employment and you can see from a mile away that it’s not going to work out.

    So this fucking ten penny nail physiqued twit buys himself a cup of coffee and doesn’t ask me if perhaps I wanted one.

    So he introduces himself as “Josh” (not his real name, although it could have been) and tells me he is a senior associate and head of design for his company. He them pulls out a pulls out a folded yellow sheet of paper ripped off a legal pad. On it in arsty, devil -may care-printing is a list labelled skill requirements.

    Here’s what this stunate was looking for:

    Masters degree in engineering.
    proven track record in industrial design
    Ability to sculpt in clay, foam.
    Ability to build circuit boards.
    Expert in mold design
    Must be a master machinist with injection mold and tooling experience.
    Proficient in computer based illustration software
    art degree preferred
    Chinese language skills a definite plus
    Knowledge of patent application law.

    I look up from the list and stare at this delusional beta male and say:
    ARE YOU FUCKIN’ KIDDING ME? WHAT FUCKING PLANET ARE YOU FROM?
    This clueless turd ten utters, “so, may I see your portfolio?”
    Did you hear me? IS THIS A JOKE? There isn’t a guy on the planet with this skill set! are you insane? If You needed this skill set your talking about 4 different people.

    So beta male is now getting nervous. .W-w-w-well…ummm …are you interested.

    My friggin’ jaw hits the floor.

    What exactly are you attempting to build?

    I can’t tell you unless you take the job.

    OK…so how much does it pay?
    What are do you charge?

    75 bucks an hour plus time and half for hours over 40. Double time for Sunday and Holidays.
    Ummm well….can’t we work out some sweat equity deal….say ten percent of the profits and…ummm 10 bucks an hour?

    OK Junior…let me see if I understand this…you want the perfect combination of a master machinist, manufacturing expert, a chinese linguist, Buckminster Fuller, an ME from Cal tTch, Mr Wizard, Rodin, an electronics engineer, Clarence Thomas and Andy Fucking Warhol for ten bucks an hour?

    …and ten perecent of the profits…

    • I’m not surprised in the slightest. I haven’t been looking for six years, and I’m still regularly receiving queries like these every few days. Every last one of them wants a 17-year-old with 20 years’ experience in tech that’s been around for six weeks, and that the free-range Soylent Green trying to fill the job can’t even pronounce. Oh, and for ten dollars an hour, too. When you laugh and point at them, they then sulk off, whimpering “Well, when we hit it big, you’ll regret turning us down!” Six months later, you discover either that the “company” went under when Dad’s money shut off, or that the Feds got involved in creative bookkeeping issues. (Back during the dotcom era, I had constant calls from tech recruiters trying to fill one such position, and after one particularly horrible interview, I turned them all down. It turns out that it was a damn good thing I did: at the beginning of 2000, the employees discovered that they couldn’t get into work because the FBI had changed all of the locks and listed everything inside as potential evidence. Want to guess how much employee 401(k) money those bastards stole on their way out, too?)

      • These up-and-coming bullshit artists are looking for Buckaroo Bonzai on the cheap. I’m surprised you didn’t beat him comatose for insulting you with that offer. Oh, did he mention the ramen and Fruit Loops sharing plan in case their parents are late with the monthly subsidy?

      • That sounds like every dot-com I ever interviewed with back in the day. I am so fucking glad that period in history is over. Remember Fucked Company (I believe that’s where Stevie cut his teeth in the trolling biz initially)? My favorite question for interviewers back then was “can I have $7,000 extra cash each year instead of stock options”. Man you should have seen their faces drop. The butthurt was worse than Stevie being pounded in Rikers by a guy named Tyson.

    • there is no guy on this planet with that skillset, but there are plenty willing to say so, ‘fake it till they make it’, and blame the most vulnerable guy in the room when the problems emerge.

    • Sorry you went through that, really. Unfortunatley, it’s the normative not a ‘back in the day’ kind of thing, so don’t let it get you down when it happens again and given job searching can result in great stress, use the opportunity to take it out on them for wasting your time, if they do. I’m sorry, but there’s nothing in the world funnier to me than some shit stain that just popped out of school blabbering about Java right in front of a few guys who can write fucking Assembly in their sleep. The ‘drag n drop’ crew’s got nothing, and I *mean* NOTHING, on these cats with TI, Hughes, NASA, and CERN projects under their belts. It’s like hearing some jagoff MSCE cert boy trying to brag in front of Schnier. The point is, instead of asking YOU what you know and what you have done and can do to determine wether it’s a good fit for both of you, these sperm squirts just vomit up a bunch of cobble together demands that they themselves don’t even fucking understand. Argh!! lol Hang in there Pat and I wish you luck as you navigate the waters. Bat the flotsam away for the fun of it.

    • So that’s why we’ve been troll free since Friday, no Wifi in jail.

      • Well, that and no bail money. Apparently, Mom and Dad aren’t giving up any more of their 401(k) money any more.

    • I hear Stevie’s name in the joint is “Fifi Bag”.

      • It’s probably “Weeping Willie,” too. One guy looks at him crosseyed, and he shits his pants. Hours of fun for the whole cell block.

    • That can’t be Stevie. This guy has an Adam’s apple.

      • I’ve heard that in gender alteration therapy, the adam’s apple is the most painful part to operate on, worse than getting your manhood lobbed off and refitted as womanhood.
        That is weeping willie all right. Pity because he looks like how I expect Stevie to look around now with the makeup removed.

        I still wonder what happened to his redhead.

        • She probably went for someone with a stable job. She probably wasn’t looking forward to having to move in with his folks around her 50th birthday. “But you can’t expect me to quit my web design internship for a real job! It’s my DREAM!”

          • Call me a knuckledragger, but I really think prolonged, unpaid internships are a pretty good indicator of the type of company culture you do NOT want to get into. In fact, imo, it’s actual good-faith abuse and I’m not really sure, no matter how many explanations I hear about it, how the company can justify it and how the dummy who falls into it justify it. Even a summer internship should rate minimum wage, at least. So these months long ‘blogger interns’, for free no less, strike me as incredibly…well, I guess I’ve said enough.

        • LOL Hip, you know how to turn out the controversial topic. It’s cringeworthy. I get the whole ‘it’s my body, not yours’ explanations but I admit it I find it worrisome that there are doctors willing to chop up young people’s bodies like that. I understand they insist that’s who they are, but damn, who knows who they really are at 18 or even 21? Someone told me that in the woman to man transition, they chop off the chicks tits, stuff her full of roids or whatever, and then a carve a dick out of their forearms and…blurgh…I suppose someone really, really, really must feel that way if they’re gonna go that far but still…

          • I am pretty sure people don’t go getting their dicks cut off and Adams apples shaved, or boobs removed and vag all redesigned unless you are DEAD fucking serious. You know how much that all costs? Besides the pain from those procedures.

            Imagine how horrible you would need to feel *everyday*, in order for THAT^ to be your best option, something you feel you need to do. I am sure it’s physically painful, but it sure beats suicide (common to people with gender dysmorphia).

            SO glad I do not have that problem, cannot imagine it.

          • (except for Stevie of course….)^^^

          • Don’t forget the psych evaluations, which are expensive as hell and can take years. And (costly) hormones before the surgeries, which you can only get once your therapist approves.

  11. You know, I don’t give a fuck about hipsters, or the vast majority of the losers on this site who claim not to be hipsters, and so fucking are. Fuck all of you. You are all sacks of American shit. American losers.

    “Oh, woe is me, I’m not a hipster am I?”

    No, you stupid fuck. You, and all the shitty shitbags who read this site are nothing but. Hipster idiots and Americans are fucking retards. Shitty, ass end retards. Embrace it, fucking morons!

    • We’ll remind you in your very own words, Stevie:
      You are on here even at X-mas.
      Yes, that’s right, X-mas day.

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