Wow – this article has it all: “Bushwick artist”; “Brooklyn cyclist”; “photography assistant gig” – and is also revealing of the typical hipster’s finances and gentrification methods. This Josh got $1555 in tickets for blowing three red lights while blasting never-to-be-known music into his ears. First of all, how is he an artist? What makes him an artist? These cocksuckers swoop into Brooklyn from Flyoverlandia and immediately they label themselves artists. What a joke.
He claims that $1555 is 10% of his annual income. Woah, hold up. You mean to tell me this hipster makes only $15,550 a year and lives in the one of the most expensive parts of the country? Eats overpriced organic food? Drinks overpriced coffee? Yeah ok, not a chance he’s on parental support. And to any hipster apologist out there: don’t tell me he has room mates. I see no difference in one trustfunder or parent enabled hipster paying $2000 for an apartment by themselves or 3 or 4 blogtographers, waiters, and creative assistants affording it together. Either way, the landlord gets his asking price and rents remain high.
“He had considered fighting the tickets but copped to the traffic violations partly because he was going to be out of town and and was required to respond to the New York State Department of Motor Vehicles within 15 days.”
Going to be out of town? Well, well, well – he’s also a traveler. Nice to know what you can do on a $15,000 a year salary. I hope more and more hipsters and bike snobs get fined like this. They are on bikes all the time but the bike lanes they begged for are empty. Rusty Schwinns are illegally chained everywhere to public and private property. Accidents are happening, pedestrians are getting hurt, and even the hipsters themselves are getting killed because of all their “look at me” bike activity – all in the name of colonizing Brooklyn and making it “better”.
Schwann vintage crap $50
Organic cotton lumberjack shirt $250
iPhone 5 on iPhone 4S contract broken prematurely $1200
Fine $1500
Posing on NY Daily News with carefully rehearsed ‘like yah I ride fast like Lance on EPO’ look.. Priceless
And his fine is 1/10 of his annual salary? So how is it possible that he can afford to live in Brooklyn and buy all that expensive shit these assholes are known to buy? I think this will get them to stop denying that they are parentally funded.
$10 says he’s lying about his income for street cred and so nobody mugs him.
Normal people have been mugged and/or worse for pocket change. Ambushing a fucking moron like this, with a shitload of iCrap toys stuffed inside a sissified messenger bag while peddling around on a bike worth a couple of bills, is like hitting Pick 3 without buying a ticket for the skell(s) about to relieve him of his stuff. There should be an app they could use to track momos like him. Consider it social redistribution, “from each who has the means, to those who want his shit”. Like, yah.
Welcome back, Joe!
Notice the smug snear on his hipster face? Kind of like: “How dare they do this to me. Don’t they know who I am?”
Some of the replies on that page are worthy of serious beatdowns. He ran through 3 red lights and was distracted. Just because he’s on a bicycle doesn’t excuse it, the motherfucker still could’ve caused a major accident.
That’s exactly why “THEY” are doing it.
Seriously, how can anyone be proud of being a hipster? stupid sick ugly motherfuckers who like to dress up like homosexual bent faggots are a bunch of fucking assholes. you stupid motherfucking fucks are a disgrace to society, who do nothing constructive with your life and are a fucking embarrassment to society you stupid ugly modern day hippie faggots. you men who wear skin tight jeans and shirts or v necks are not men but a bunch of homosexual bent faggots who enjoy getting fucked up the asshole by faggot hipster disease infested dicks and enjoys sucking on mens nipples. you hipster fucking fuckers need to dress up like real men and stop reinventing the fucking horrible 80s you worthless obnoxious degenrate cunts.
wow.
There are many gay non-hipsters who would take offense, as well as straight people who think this isn’t cool.
The hipster is a plague on society. Teh ghey is just a variation from the norm, and doesn’t bother people.
The moron still has his earplugs on in the Daily News photo. I hope he gets run over by a garbage truck next time.
“Garbage truck”……Is that the new term to replace “Point-Of-Service” unit/food wagon? I stand right next to “Comfort Food for Neckbeards” Steve’s (everyone here remembers Steve) artisanally grilled cheese wagon and laugh at him all the time while munching on a $5 ham and tomato grilled cheese sandwich from Mega-Bites diner on Dekalb. With free pickles.
I saw one of these bike maniacs going full speed into a turn that a firetruck was making on Kent Avenue last year. He could have at least slowed down, or veered away from the emergency vehicles which were trying to turn the corner with full sirens blaring. But no, he had to dive into the turn that the FDNY was making, why? Because he probably thought it was cool like surfing or something. He barely missed going splat against the wall of The Edge condos. As much as I hate these jerks, I don’t want to have to actually witness beard, bone, blood and brain matter spraying all over the place.
“As much as I hate these jerks, I don’t want to have to actually witness beard, bone, blood and brain matter spraying all over the place.”
Don’t worry. Out of the four things you mentioned, bone and brain aren’t in the equation. Hipsters fall in between amoebas and primordial multi-celled invertebrates like sea sponges on the evolutionary scale. They do make a really cool squishing sound and emit a high pitched yell when they strike solid objects like street surfaces, walls and, of course, fire equipment executing turns around corners.
Funny – I was jsut about to send in the Daily News version. They don’t bother with the “artist” bull, just call him a ‘photographer’s assistant’ – douchebag.
‘photographer’s assistant’
A plastic trash bag could be considered a “photographer’s assistant”.
Yeah, but the plastic trash bag has more personality.
As I looked at this Dinty Moore Lumberjack shirt wearing like, yah-stifarian’s sustainibly annoying mug in the photo, I thought about how to combine reconstructive surgery with construction techniques. So, I’m going to Go To Hell’s place and order an industrial-grade pneumatic rivet gun so I can attach this artisanal douchebag’s head to the roll down gate behind him.
You’re more than welcomed. I’m closing down at 3 o’clock today so you better hurry up. lol
Hey, I was first, 12:14 AM this morning, see my post under the “Masterbeard” tread. I have been married for 17 years, monogamous for 21 years, I have no life
Have you considered serial killing as a hobby?
Not a good multi tasker like Dexter.
practice makes perfect.
Awww damn DH, you beat me to this article. Speaking of hipsters on bikes, my partner and I had to take in a like yah that got NAILED on his bike last night. He’ll live. Im trying to assess the guy and about 15 like yahs gathered around me and started screaming in my face about what happened and how this is unjust. Im trying to talk to this guy, and ONLY this guy when these two beardo fucks start answering questions for him….i need to try to figure out how bad the guys brains might be scrambled. These two “guys” in womens pants decide to step to me after i tell them to back off because im trying to asses. I “clearly need to just leave and take him to the ER.” You know because not only do the know about art art art art art, but apparently they know about medicine too. Needless to say brass arrived and saved these two beardos from a cornfed colossus and a ripped big ass brother. IT GETS BETTER! NYPD arrives and they still wont go away. Now they are shouting snarky comments and coming back on to my scene. AGAIN. Well our brothers from the pct had about enough of that….sad they wont be enjoying artisinal mayo and micro brews tonight. They will be enjoying stale tuna fish and juice in the tombs til monday for interfering with emergency care.
No toony fish in stir, either. Green bolgna and blue Kool Aid. The makings of another gallery exhibit.
Awesome! The reason these idiots keep getting doored is because they don’t know how to ride a fixed gear in a city. Regular Brooklyn cyclists who have ridden FOR YEARS in traffic and Prospect Park, Central Park and the like know how to maneuver in NY traffic. Plus, we don’t wear beards and the tight chick jeans can’t help your maneuverability, ridiculous assholes. Put a front brake on your Schwinn if you don’t know how to ride in Brooklyn. Who the hell do they think they are talking shit to the cops? I love it. You think they survived overnight??
It’s a shame that trolley tracks were either removed or asphalted over. There’s nothing funnier than watching future subjects of a ghost bike memorial get their front tire caught between the rails. The bike stops dead; but, Montegue, the ironic kickball psychologist, keeps going. And going………
Portland has hipsters, bikes, and streetcars, and because of this, they have a warning: http://www.myportlandoregonhome.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/06/bike-sign.jpg
That’s expecting too much from them. How is a wearing-a-ski cap-in-the-summer Michael Nesmith impersonating, fiber optic cable limbed human exclamation point in skinny chick jeans supposed to see that sign when he’s busy texting while weaving in and out of traffic?
So far, the biggest hazard to my bike-riding as been a dude with lots of piercings and a whistle who literally pushed me out of his way while I was on the corner of Broadway and Marcus Garvey, waiting for traffic to clear up. I’ve almost run into trucks that made abrupt double parks, and I’ve had pedestrians throw shit at me because I rode around them on Eastern Parkway, but that dude was still the worst.
Here, here, Sally! I’ve been riding in this city for 22 years. Just the other day I was riding in Manhattan and saw a cop and stopped at the red light even though no one was coming because, well, I SAW A COP and knew he could ticket me. Jerkface (the hipster, not the cop, who is doing his damned job!)
you hipster assholes. i hope one day you get a wake call and realise how useless you bunch of ugly motherfuckers are. you worthless pieces of shits. you disgusting STD infected cunts are the worst sumbags on the planet. honestly you stink worser than my own shit in the bathroom and are nothing but a bunch of wierd ugly motheberfuckers. clean your fucking bodies and shave your beards you stupid homosexual bent cunts who enjoy getting rammed up the asshole with other hipster dicks. you female hipsters are also ugly looking cunts that you are not even worth the wank. you hipsters are a disgrace and are a bunch of fucking asshole fuckers who deserve to be beaten up with tire irons. you fucking vile vindictive filthy goats who have no idea of what it takes to be real man and women, you fucking nasty smelly hipster cunts who enjoy actling like 5 years olds should be thrown into a safari and used as game because you are useless non productive members of society and have ruined everything for us. GET A FUCKING SHOWER and clean shave and stop dressing like women with your gay ass v necks and women skinny jeans and learn to be men and stop sucking hipster dicks you fucking ugly filthy fuckers, even a fucking farm pig looks better than you, you piece of hipster vermin assholes. you fucking hipster scumbags.
Too over the top to be real. Nice try, troll.
fuck off asshole. nothing is over the top when it comes to bashing hipsters you dickhead
Eat shit and die.
Dead give away, Needy.
4finger riff,
go fuck yourself and same to you MD Burbs. Stop accusing me of being a troll. Piece of shit vermin asshole that you are.
What are you doing back here? The battle front has moved to the Beard Oil postings. Typical hipster tactic, backfilling.
Agreed. Riff.
Yes, isn’t it easy to spot him?
Seattle is trying to develop their city streets into a bike-friendly zone too. Thanks, hipsters and yups.
I “doored” an obnoxious (is there any other kind?) No. 9 Spaghettini- limbed lice-cyclist who punched the rear window of the car I was in on Kent and Wiiliamsburg St. yesterday afternoon. No damage to the car. Can’t say the same for Lance Noarmstrength. I did take notice of the similarity between him and a crumpled piece of aluminum foil, though.
Your welcome.
“Lance Noarmstrength”
LMAO!
Waiting tables & bartending actually takes work and patience putting up with all kinds of asshole customers and putting in long hours. Two things hiptards could never do for more than a day or two. Photographer’s assistant is the equivalent of a jizz mopper in a (long shut down) Times Square peep show palace.
Familiarity breeds contempt. The clientele at most of the joints where these mere imbecile lumps of ordinary organic animal matter work as waiters represent the same demographic as they themselves do.
This dork doesn’t seem to be aware that the Daily News is offering him up as mockery-bait to their readership.
DAILY NEWS: “Hey, we’d like to run an article about your bike tickets, maybe a photo of you on your bike in front of a Bushwick street sign…”
HIPSTER: “Yah ok cool”
….later…
HIPSTER: “WTF! They called me a hipster in the article!”
DAILY NEWS READERSHIP: “Get a fucking job you lumberjack shirt wearing bearded douchebag”
Good. I hope more of these headphone wearing, Dinty Moore lumberjack shirt(loved that one,lol) traffic law ignoring hipster artist “photographer’s assistants” get ticketed more and more often. Because I see them every day. Every day I see those snot nosed toilet brushes not using bike lanes, wearing headphones AND talking on the phone simultaneously(not making this up), in a busy intersection, not paying attention, wobbly and unsteady on their kewel fixies and oversized murses throwing them off balance as they cross through red lights into oncoming traffic. I NEVER see them in bike lanes. I see them everywhere EXCEPT bike lanes.
If these skinny jean low cut v-neck wearing smug entitled “photography assistants/art historians/videographers/DJs” wearing headphones while riding in city traffic, not in a bike lane and not obeying traffic laws gets doored and floored, he most likely deserved it.
I saw one last week, not in a bike lane(SHOCKER), wearing headphones, in an intersection trying to balance on his rilly kewel fixie. I started crossing the intersection when the light changed. I heard this CRASH behind me. I looked back and Josh had wiped out all on his own. There was nobody near him, no cars, nothing. I snickered and laughed. They should go back to riding their Big Wheels or bikes with training wheels because they really don’t know how to ride a bike yet. Much less ride one in traffic.
wow what a smug, self righteous douche. how dare they ticket me! i have no sympathy for people who ride bikes with headphones on and then run lights. i’m sure he’d be blaming whoever hit him immediately when the accident report gets taken.
Shouldn’t the fine for a moving violation in the bike lane double if you are a douchebag?
Very simple. I’ve said this before…
When you go on safari through the jungle you have a goat walk before your party. If a tiger wants to attack your party, it attacks the weakest member, in this case the goat.
This is the one function that hipsters fulfill. The goat.
They work well as mugger bait and in this case ticket bait. Why would a mugger bother a heads up person aware of his surroundings, when he could easily jump a skinny girlyman who is reading an iPad while walking down a dark street late at night?
Here we have ticket bait. No way that cop would write me all those tickets. I’d take maybe one but after that the ball busting would go into full effect. I’ve talked my way out of worse. I, like the rest of you native bklynites have the built in gift of ball busting. It’s what we do…
The city always needs money. The hipster needs attention and blog subjects. In this case everyone wins. The city makes money, the hipster gets attention and something to blog about and the hipster parents get to write a check to the City of New York.
“The city always needs money. The hipster needs attention and blog subjects. In this case everyone wins. The city makes money, the hipster gets attention and something to blog about and the hipster parents get to write a check to the City of New York.”
MY thoughts exactly.
A cop ticketed me for riding on the sidewalk once. I went to the traffic court and pleaded not guilty at the requested time and they threw the whole thing out – no fines. This dude had multiple violations, so I’m sure he wouldn’t have had it so easy, but I’m sure he would have had it a lot easier. The fact that a guy had a jacked-up fine for pleading guilty is not news, so I’m pretty sure the NDN is just capitalizing on hipster hate, which is pretty funny.
Yeah, but the idiot checked the “Guity” [I AM A MORON] box and wrote a check from daddy’s account. What a spineless dufus.
Haha. I wonder if he’ll learn a lesson on how the legal system works, or if he’ll take the opposite route and start writing an “NYC traffic court blog” about how unjust they are because they (gasp) fine you for pleading guilty on a form.
These tryhards are so starved for attention. The only way The Daily News would even know about this in the first place is because somebody had to call their editor’s attention to it. Gee, I wonder who did that? He must figure that any media exposure is better than none, so he calls The News desk and gives them the lead and poses–proud as a new papa–up against his “ride” while proudly fanning out the summonses like Regis Philbin fanning out a stack of bills in the promo for that dopey fucking game show he hosted a few years ago.
Yes this is guy is a hipster dickhead, but this whole thing about bicycles is getting a little bit ridiculous.
I have lived in Brooklyn, yes below the line, for over 40 years and have used a bicycle to get around my hood and occasional longer rides since I was a pre-teen. It’s a great way to go short distances and you get a little exercise to boot, I agree that most of the bike lanes are unnecessary and probably cause more disruption than they prevent. I prefer the tried and true method of staying off heavily traveled avenues thus avoiding heavy auto traffic whenever possible. That and staying alert to any opening doors and stop sign car rollers, you know who you are, who are not looking for someone on a bicycle.
The whole thing with cops writing tickets for bikes going through red lights is bullshit however. I have been rolling slowly through reds for over thirty years and never once had anything close to an incident with me and a pedestrian or a car. The key is to do carefully and not at full speed. The police have seen me roll through dozens of red lights over the years and have never once written me a ticket or even commented on it. This is just another way for the city to extract money from whoever they can,however they can and it is bullshit. I am sure the police have better things to do.
So yeah this guy is a jerkoff, who probably deserves whatever he gets especially if it hastens his return to artistconsin, but don’t hate on everyone who rides a bike, it’s just silly.
And now it looks as if this might cost me money, Fucking Hipsters.
Hey I’m all for bikes in theory. Too bad the reality is that iDouchebags regular speed, run lights, go the against traffic or ride on the shadow sidewalks of *their* bikelanes. I’ve even seen one idiot texting!
The City went all in installing the lanes so bikes are no longer just cutesy ecological mode of getting around, they are vehicles – so maybe they should be licensed like other Vespas, carriage horses and pedicabs
The reality is that until the last 10-15 years, people have been riding bikes on the streets, with vehicular traffic and there was no problem. Bikers respected the fact that in a pissing contest with a bus, they lose every time. People weren’t reckless and inconsiderate when when riding on city streets. Then came bike messengers who set the precedent for kamikaze tactics and overaggressive behavior. How many of you remember the news reports of pedestrians getting injured and killed by Speedo-wearing jerkoffs? This progressed to yuppies, New Age dicks and other numbnuts pedaling their stupid asses away, in and out of traffic, on sidewalks and over pedestrians. They ignored the fact that bikes are governed by the same motor vehicle rules as are autos. They felt that they were entitled to ride any way it was convenient for them. They were special.
These self-entitled douchebags lucked out when that annoying bitch, Jennie Sadik-Khan was appointed DOT Commissioner by that sawed off little elitist prick, Bloomberg. Sadik-Khan, like the Emperor, don’t like the fact that the common slob is able to own a car. Common slobs shouldn’t have that privilege. Common slobs should use public transportation or ride bikes. Just like in Amsterdam. Sadik-Khan did everything possible to make life difficult for the common slob who owned a car. She closed off a huge chunk of Midtown from vehicular traffic in order to turn the entire area into an ass park for stupid tourists and playcationing kiddults. Then, she has these fucking bike lanes installed everywhere, causing more traffic bottlenecks because some streets are reduced to one lane each way. She even had bike lanes place on pedestrian walkways on all the fucking bridges, increasing the possibility that some jackass will wipe out somebody strolling along because the scumbag on the fixie just has to ride at top speed instead of walking the bike over. These lame-asstic pedalphiles want Sadik-Khan to transform this city into a true New Amsterdam. Guess what? This ain’t Amsterdam. You want Amsterdam so bad, move there. I do my civic obligation and clothesline or “door” obnoxious bikers whenever the opportunity presents itself. Arguing with these idiots solves nothing. Neither do, in the long run, my tactics. Tell you what, though. It suuuuuuuure is satisfying on a personal level.
Haha – yes exactly. And btw I’m not slamming regular people – just unicycling,baby bike trailer-pulling-through-midtown-traffic nimrods.
Hell, if Napoleon Bloomturd insists on transforming NYC into Amsterdam, the lease he could do is legalize pot and prostitution.
I have been riding a bike in MY city for 22 years. Everywhere, every borough. Have taken some bad spills, even. And I never ride with headphones–you know why? Because it’s fucking stupid! Biking in the city is a GOOD thing, as are bike lanes. Less cars, more bikes = better for everyone, in principle. But Douchebags who ride with blasting music while running red lights—and then give cops attitudes are BAD things. In the end, no matter what percentage of his income that was, he was ABLE TO PAY a $1500 Douchebag Fine! Meaning he is officially a Doucebag. He should get a fucking gold-inlayed certificate with his name on it so he can frame it and show his Douchebags parents. They will be so proud!
I guess this moron has never seen or heard of a Ghost Bike either. Even people who do NOT wear headphones and who wear helmets die on their bikes regularly on a weekly basis in this city. (I know two personally). So if you’re so fucking stupid that you will blow red lights with headphones on? You are lucky you’re in the paper for a $1500 fine instead of for your own obituary. Asshole.
No argument from me!
so true, and funny how these people who are the BIGGEST cop callers kick and scream when it comes to obeying a simple law
I am so fucking sick of these dipshits riding on the sidewalk. They have the nerve to get tight when my pit bull lunges at them. You retards, he is on the sidewalk WHERE HE BELONGS. if you can’t ride in the street, then expect to get mauled by a 70 pound pit.
SMH @ this story.
But yeah, these hipsturd bikers around here really do genuinely worry me. They blaze through traffic and act like they own the road. I almost got hit by two of these fucks in the short time I’ve lived in Brooklyn (and New York in general…yes, I’m a transplant from outta state). Like, the type of people that would pummel into you on their parentally funded $2,500 bike and curse you out because YOU were in THEIR way…shameful.
BTW…I have no problems with responsible bikers at all..none. Just irresponsible bikers that don’t obey the rules of the road and pose a threat to pedestrians.
The City has always welcomed transplants. COOL transplants. Jack Kerouac, Louis Armstrong, David Byrne, Jimi Hendrix, Charlie Parker, Jackson Pollock, Debbie Harry, Bob Dylan, my grandparents*……..Hey, it’s MY list, etc., etc., etc.
*Shanty Irish Bronx/Sicilian Wop Brooklyn
Yup. They were all cool, but none of them were hip. They were cool, and then, when they got popular, society anointed them as hip. They became fashion-conscious and self-promoting, but they became that way only because they got famous. The modern-day type is pre-emptively fashion-conscious and self-promoting – in other words, pre-emptively hip. Which is why hipster is such a great word for them.
We don’t mind transplants, as long as they are true to themselves. Moving here will never make you a New Yorker. That’s OK though. Why would you want to pretend to be something you aren’t? Be proud of where you are from and just recognize that you LIVE HERE only. You could live in Mumbai next week. You would not be an Indian. And DON’T act like you own the place. I have come across so many transplants that want to start talking shit to me, but when I say let’s throw up the hands, they run away. Rule number one in NYC, if you can’t back your talk up, shut the fuck up. Today’s lesson is over kiddies.
http://www.facebook.com/ThisIsdgartistics – a link to this tool bags “art” please leave hate, he really does deserve it.
http://www.facebook.com/ThisIsdgartistics – a link to this tool bags “art”, please leave hate i went to HS with this guy and he really is as smug as he looks in that photo
A tenth of his annual income, but that certainly doesn’t affect his ability to purchase those stylish Apple earbuds he’s posing with in his photo, which I can only assume goes into an iPod or iPhone.
I’m pretty hipster-tolerant (not living in Brooklyn probably helps immensely), but I really want to punch this guy in his neckbeard.