If this fucking video doesn’t scream “BROOKLYN IS DONE!!!!” then I don’t know what does. These fucking people think that whatever they make, touch, say and do is “soooo Brooklyn”, “very Brooklyn”, “like, rilly rilly Brooklyn”. But it’s not; its the exact opposite. They are completely draining Brooklyn of whatever it stood for. She says Brooklyn “didn’t have it’s own grooming line” – so she just HAD to make one. Brooklyn needed her help and she was there at it’s calling. The Williamsburg oil smells like wood? Shouldn’t it smell like stale beer, vomit and smelly Converse? Fucking try-hards is all these people are; everyday they are thinking of new ways to bastardize this place. I wonder why she didn’t make a Borough Park or Crown Heights beard oil. Just about every man has a beard there; except those aren’t ironic beards. Notice how the last frame of the video had to include that disgusting black beardo’s stretched earlobe? And how they are thanking Brooklyn; thanking it for letting them live out their perpetual toddler lives. Can’t fucking stand these fucking hipsters I tell you.
The video won’t embed so here is the link:
With luck the beard oil is flammable. Then next time (with some luck) one of those turds lights up an artisianal cigarette or his hand made Lithuanian gopher bone pipe he will go up like a buddist monk.
… or his prized artisinal bong, carved from a jen-yoo-wine bull penis …
OK, if it starts catching hipsters on fire, this beard oil might prove worthy of existence.
How apropos. They look like sparklers with beards anyway. The guys too.
that was hysterical
http://www.brooklynpaper.com/stories/35/42/all_brooklynscents_2012_10_19_bk.html?comm=1#feedback
“Williamsburg is filled with virile, woodsy men……” wtf?
The “woodsy” part is easy to explain. That is the definition of a matchstick limbed toothpick framed Maynard G. Krebs looking shish-ke-bab skewer with a beard. The “virile” reference was about their girlfriends.
From tumbler
“Meet Mckenzie Santiago and Alfredo Catedral, the duo behind Brooklyn Grooming — the borough’s premiere small-batch, hand-made, all-natural, organic, artisanal, very Brooklyn men’s (and women’s) grooming line.”
“Very Brooklyn” beard oil?. I’m in a silent speechless free fall vomit- stick a knife in their ass and turn them over…….
Considering their target demographic, that being “small-batch, hand-made, all-natural, organic, artisanal” afficionados, “Brooklyn Grooming” is an oxymoron.
Besides, who would be so much of a tool as to think that using products from Brooklyn Grooming would give them hipster … ooops, sorry; “Creative kid” cred? When it comes to marketing, these morons are more impressionable than wet cement and more pliable than Silly Putty.
Well ya man. The way I see it those people are livestock. I needs to harvest their cash. I mean shit, born rich and a sucker thats awesome. I off to brainstorm yo.
Seriously:
Sell cheap baby oil with some extra scent in some retro bottles with artisanal looking labels for an astronomic price.
Sell them “Organic artisanal MacBook cleaner” (dish liquid + tap water).
Sell them organic artisanal wool hat care (green soap + lavender for the smell).
Sell them carpenters pencils (those with a flat lead) as “Calligraphy Pencil”
Sell them argentinian steak as “in-vitro grown vegan beef”.
Sell them dextrose/dried mushrooms as cocaine/magic mushrooms (yes, this works! done that myself when i was 18 and poor.)
Sell them the ugliest rags you can find at the red cross shop/salvation army (spatter some neon textile paint on it, screenprint a few fucking triangles and sell the crap for a fortune).
Just anything ordinary in a fart-isanal packaging, tell them a phony and kitschy story about it and be completely insane with the price.
Maybe sell it in an infested Park from a ridiculous looking vendors tray or tricycle. Get your fucktard-cred clothes from the salvation army, the glasses from hot topic and the hat from one of grandmas knitted pillowboxes.
Oh yeah. Gonna visit the red cross shop tomorrow for some hipster racketing. >:)
Wow! an entire site dedicated to hating Hipsters, how original. This coming from a guy who labels himself a suburban punk. I mean that screams trust fund to me. All of you need to get a fucking life and start doing something productive with yourselves.
Who gives a shit if its hipster, what does that even mean?
Don’t you think its just as ironic and cool to hate hipsters?
I’d love to see a pic of you, I bet you look just like the people you hate.
These types of dumb sites are too predictable. I mean really guys, get a life.
I mean rilley, rilley….like, rilley, rilley get a life….like rilley….
” suburban punk” is nothing more than a hipster without the trust fund. It means that unlike subsidized neckbeards who infest real cities with their annoying self absorbed sub-culture, you’ll just stay in your pathetic tract housing cul de sac community. It’s what you label yourself as, huh? Everybody who knows you just calls you a teabagging douchebag. And, that’s just your family. Why don’t you slide your greasy ass over to the mall and get laughed at by some ten year old kids? It’s not like you’re not used to that.
You aren’t “punk” by any stretch of the imagination. Hating people who deserve it, has nothing to do with “being cool” aka “the life-long, unattainable goal of every hipster and hipster wannabe”. Oh, no we do not look like anything like hipsters. We are not that ugly. The heterosexual hipster (beta)male is the only dude who could walk into a gay bar and not have a single patron offer to buy him a drink. That’s how ugly you fuckers are. I tell you what, we’ll “get a life” if you end yours.
Translation: “My mom thinks I’m cool.” And how many hipster cliches can we count in one single post? “What does that even mean?” “Don’t you think it’s just as ironic and cool to hate hipsters?” Oh, and “These types of dumb sites are too predictable.” I’m disappointed that he didn’t add “Well, if that’s what you are, then what am I?”
Back filling two days later? And we should get a life? Please, Needy, come back up front and stick to one handle, we’ll be waiting for you.
They really do want clubbing like a small seal.
We have a similar problem here in London, with or without beard,and somebody made a YouTube video about them: it’s called ‘Being A Dickhead’s Cool’. Hope you enjoy!
Oh, nearly forgot: today in The Guardian (national newspaper) there is an article on all the bars you rail about in Brooklyn – I’ll include that, also.
http://www.guardian.co.uk/travel/2012/oct/12/brooklyn-new-york-beer-food
Thanks London-style – Clearly a global urban virus….. F’in wankers without borders
Well, others on the list besides myself have complained hipsters here in the UK and elsewhere in the world.
Certainly Toronto has this problem, as does Berlin.
I’m sure that there are other cities in the world that have this social problem, which has appeared in the last few years.
Just don’t quite understand what created/caused it, though.
Losers mistakenly interpreting “Revenge of the Nerd” as a self awareness tutorial.
As a nerd, let me merely point out that we nerds typically have transferable, sought after skills like STEM degrees and an ability to design stuff that works and for which people will pay us money. Also, we buy our Xboxes with our own cash.
Hipsters on the other hand have no skills that people will pay cash for(unless you count fellatio) and buy Xboxes using daddy’s cash
Maybe a generation of post college jobless youth who have the funds to reject available work they see as beneath them so they can “innovate” by infecting real life urban neighborhoods – turning them into perpetual college campuses and social theme parks on mum and dad’s dime ?
The 47 per cent. I was on the B62 bus two weeks ago and overheard a phone conversation some greasy Cankleen had with her father:
Yah, dad, I’ve been clean for almost two weeks. Could you send me $2500? I gave it to Rob for safekeeping; but, I don’t know what happened. It disappeared like. I searched the entire room we have at the homeless shelter and couldn’t find it. Noooooooo, dad, Rob didn’t steal it. He’s been clean for almost a month. He was holding it and it wasn’t in his wallet when we checked. We think that one of the social workers took it out of his wallet. They do things like that here. We applied for joint residence but they said that I’m still supported by my parents. They’re supposed to send you some documents. What you need to do is say that you, oh I don’t know, like, you like disowned me and provide no financial support. Oh, I applied for SSI and you saying that would really help with that too. Rob? Oh, he’s waiting for retroactive money from Social Security from that time he had the heart attack and that blood vessel burst in his head (Rob is about 6’3” and looks like a fucking gym rat. There wasn’t shit wrong with him). His lawyer said he is supposed to get almost $57,000. What? Oh, Rob says that we should think about moving from NYC. He was thinking Florida or Vermont. He said that once he gets the check, he’s going to check out Florida first. Then He’s going to Vermont. He’ll send for me once he figures out which would be the best for us (Send for her. Yeah, right. Stupid bitch). I love you dad. I knew that it would be better talking to you instead of mom. She doesn’t see things the way you do. You should really think about divorcing her. She only wants to spend your money. I want you to be happy before you die.
Killing these useless leeches should be considered a public service.
Yeah, right, if only we could round up that 47% and get them all in one area… we could call it… a concentration camp! Brilliant idea.
It’d be called a housing project. But, that term isn’t available.
“She (Mom) doesn’t see things the way you do. You should really think about divorcing her. She only wants to spend your money. I want you to be happy before you die.”
Of course! It’s far better for Cankle Princess to be the one to spend Daddy’s money instead of Mom while she plays the system. And people wonder why this country has gone to the dogs.
Am I the only one reminded of that scene in Sid & Nancy with Nancy calling home, trying to convince her mom that she and Sid were married so her mother would send money? “I am SO married! Shut up! If you don’t send me the money RIGHT NOW, we’re both gonna fucking DIE! You’d like that, wouldn’t you!”
*maniacal smashing and crashing, leading to Nancy falling face-first in the mud outside the phone booth*
“They wouldn’t give us any money! They said we’d spend it all on drugs!”
“But we were!”
Ah, Sid and Nancy. America’s First Couple. Gary Oldman was O.K.*
*I’m not a film critic. I only portray one on blog sites.
Fantastic , I think this is the best definition of a hipster and what it is that we hate about them all packed into a single sentence . Says it all !
Yuppies spawning.
Chavs or hipster scum, what a choice.
Thanks for the laugh. Reading that article must give one the impression that these dickheads invented bars. I know a few places where the regular patrons would use one of these clowns as a hockey puck should they dare enter.
“McKenzie” Santiago?!? McKenzie needs to be tied to the rear bumper of a Cafe Bustelo delivery truck and dragged the entire length of Bedford Avenue just for that contrived moniker,
I’ll tell you what’s rilly, rilly Brooklyn:
A gen-oo- wine Greenpernt curb job administered while wearing some good old steel-toed construction boots. Oh, and don’t forget to attach the ice creepers on the soles. They make the perfect beard grooming accessory for both chick jeans wearing Silly String models and their Cankle Spaniel companions.
“At first I lived in the East Village.” No, at first you lived in Ohio. Admit it.
Bitch got loot !
Good one Joe.
Collapse in society please come soon. Please.
She “likes the smell of wood on a guy.” Where was a bimbo like this when I was in my twenties?
“She likes the smell of wood on a guy.”
So do I. Especially when the wood is a 2×4 with a spike in the end of it, being applied judiciously to the hairy parts. It smells like… VICTORY!
Hey Beavis, she said “Wood” huh huh huh huh huh.
Yeah Butthead, “Morning Wood” heh heh heh heh heh.
She likes a man to smell like wood huh huh huh huh.
Wood, heh heh heh heh heh..
Lol
@ Tom
McKenzie should whip up a batch for the snatch to match!
you hipster assholes. i hope one day you get a wake call and realise how useless you bunch of ugly motherfuckers are. you worthless pieces of shits. you disgusting STD infected cunts are the worst sumbags on the planet. honestly you stink worser than my own shit in the bathroom and are nothing but a bunch of wierd ugly motheberfuckers. clean your fucking bodies and shave your beards you stupid homosexual bent cunts who enjoy getting rammed up the asshole with other hipster dicks. you female hipsters are also ugly looking cunts that you are not even worth the wank. you hipsters are a disgrace and are a bunch of fucking asshole fuckers who deserve to be beaten up with tire irons. you fucking vile vindictive filthy goats who have no idea of what it takes to be real man and women, you fucking nasty smelly hipster cunts who enjoy actling like 5 years olds should be thrown into a safari and used as game because you are useless non productive members of society and have ruined everything for us. GET A FUCKING SHOWER and clean shave and stop dressing like women with your gay ass v necks and women skinny jeans and learn to be men and stop sucking hipster dicks you fucking ugly filthy fuckers, even a fucking farm pig looks better than you, you piece of hipster vermin assholes. you fucking hipster scumbags.
RIGHT! And Vegas is full of cows.
CAUTION: Phony Posting Alert. Just another Needy Ned sockpuppet.
Hey Ned, the wife and I are in NYC tonight for dinner with a client of mine. He wants to take us to Peter Luger for dinner, so I told him sure, even though we have a Luger’s back in Las Vegas. We have reservations for 8:30, so why don’t you drop by and join us? I’ll be easy to spot – I’ll be the guy wearing the bronc-buster hat.
We’re staying at the Mandarin Oriental on Columbus Circle, so Clark’s sending a car around to pick us up in 20 minutes or so. I won’t have the opportunity to read your reply, so just drop on by.
By the way, you might want to take a shower. Peter Luger doesn’t let in people who smell like saddle tramps. Slainte!
Bon appetite to you and your lady, Robes. Tonight you’ve lowered the proportion of hipsters in Billyburg by two!
Oh, and she is this cool americanized asian girl.
I bet every Zachary out there has a woody for her….
MacKenzie, my beard feels great, thank you Brooklyn.
I wish violent anal rape on everyone involved.
And what the fuck is it with the credits after a short ad clip?
Short answer:
These attention starved, self absorbed, narcissistic me-monkeys need to feed their egos every fifteen minutes. Otherwise, like shrews that have to eat constantly, they would die of attention starvation if they didn’t,
http://brokelyn.com/brooklyn-grooming-beard-oil/
Mckenzie
Hi there,
I am the owner of Brooklyn grooming.
First off the beard oil is $29 and since you have such strong opinions about the stuff maybe you should try some before you start writing reviews.
Heres a tumblr video about my company
http://storyboard.tumblr.com/post/33156469853/beardwatching-in-brooklyn-grandpa#beardwatching-in-brooklyn
And don’t be a hater.
10.8.12 at 11:36 am
That link leads to an article by the great Sky Dylan-Robbins.
She’s just pissed that her application at the massage parlor was rejected.
“And don’t be a hater.”
Let’s compromise. Die and you got a deal.
When her very first comment in an article praising her says “And don’t be a hater”, you know she’s off to a good start.
After mulling it over a pot of coffee for breakfast, I decided that I’m firmly in favor of public beatdowns of these worms with facial hair with blunt instruments as form of artistic expression.
“Its art if you want to see it again”.
WHY YES! That would be art i want to see again and again and again and again, not like the sheezy hipster artsy fartsy scribble shit that one just wants to un-see.
People born and raised here know that “Very Brooklyn, organic, artisanal” means not very Brooklyn. It means “very Ohio transplant version of what transplants think is very Brooklyn”.
Not once in my entire life have I ever heard someone say “Oh that’s very Brooklyn” until now, and it sounds completely fake
Speaking of fake how awful were those testimonials? That was some of the worst acting I’ve ever seen in my life. I can tell the beardos themselves don’t want to smear any more grease on their already greasy beards.
They weren’t acting. Bullshit imitates AAA battery-armed assholes, or something to that effect.
I’ve had a beard for 25 years now. Seems to be OK without beard oil. At least you rip off hipsters, can’t fault you for that. Whats you next big idea? Cankel reduction cream? Kickball lubricant? Faux Lumber-Jack shirt hangers? Fedora hooks? Woody Allen Birth Control Glasses Cleaner? Your sisters jeans grease?
Beard Oil. Finally something less useful than this device.
Prices range from $29 – $48 each for all of 60ml. How did my beard ever live without beard oil? My life is changed forever. Thank you McKenzie Santiago. I’ll never be a hater again.
http://brooklyngrooming.com/collections/types?q=Beard+oil
One question, where does the women’s beard formula get used? Pussy, underarms, legs, breasts? Gotta smell good for the next naked bike ride.
To put that in economic perspective: 1 60ml bottle of beard oil = 6-8 bars of Masturbation Bros chocolate.
1 gallon = 63 * 60ml.
63 * $48 = $3,028 per gallon of beard oil or 379 bars of Masturbation Bros chocolate.
I think we’ve got to hand it to McKenzie. She’s separating them from their money faster than the Hipster Grifter did. And she’s doing it legally.
This is fucking scheme perpetrated by yet another shiftless, useless parasite to avoid facing reality and getting a real job.
The anthem for all these hummus munching leeches should be
I don’t even know where to begin.
http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=8&cad=rja&ved=0CEUQtwIwBw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DWJlnAugXSRk&ei=Kyp7UL7bO_DW0gGi_YD4DA&usg=AFQjCNGjEfBw5TYBCGrljVMMqAveZt6ANA
call me crazy, but nobody i know who GREW UP IN BROOKLYN has a beard…i love how these beardo assholes label everything “Brooklyn.” They have no right.
and the second i see something in a store with the label “brooklyn”, 9 out of 10 times it is hipster produced, not authentic…buying something with the “Brooklyn” label produced by a hipster is the same as going to chinatown and buying a fake gucci bag. FAKE
Man you all are really not wanting me to every visit new york city! I’m pretty sure this whole thing is a global disease by now. My little brother and his gf are true hipster and I haven’t spoken to him since around thanksgiving last year. just useless fucks. although he actually does work alot and has a good job. i just wish he would grow up and look somewhat normal.
come visit, just stay out of hipsterville…ugh that sucks about your bro!
yeah i’ve actually met two people from ny down here. I’m also a yankees fan too so i’ve always wanted to go and see ground zero and everything else. Maybe get some authentic pizza.
I had similar concerns as you, but visited over summer and enjoyed myself. Stayed mostly in Flatbush, traveled between there and the city, and had maybe one run-in with a hipster. I’ll be coming back again soon.
And some idiots even name their kids Brooklyn.
it sickens me that they’re so ashamed of where they are really from…i would have more respect for her if she named her product “Utah beard oil” (or after wherever the hell she’s really from) instead.
and arent hipster beards already full of their own putrid oil since they dont wash? just sayin!
HEY ROBES check out hatehipster above. Too over the top to be genuine, don’t you think? Looks to me like our favorite troll trying to make us look rabid in an attempt to shut us down. And right after you listed his aliases. Too palpable, sirrah!
Just saw it – wife & I are changing to go out to dinner in BROOKLYN, Billyburg of all godforsaken places, in just a few minutes. I’ve invited Ned to tag along &’ll let you know if he shows up. Yeah, sure; like they’d ever let trash like him into Luger’s …
4finger riff,
I am not a troll you fucking stupid asswipe. you cannot imagine the amount of hatred i have for hipsters. everywhere i go i see motherfucking men dressed in v necks and skinny jeans that it makes me sick. i don’t think you have ever seen this much abuse in a blog against hipsters which is why you go around saying stupid things like i am troll. go fuckyourself you motherfucking dickhead.
If you are for real you need counseling. Badly.
Else you’re JAFSP (just another fucking sock puppet).
why do i need counselling? because i make fun of hipsters to a heavy degree, on a blog dedicated to hating hipsters? Seriously, maybe YOU need counselling since you can’t get the simple message of me not being a troll into your thick fucking skull.
Dickhead.
If you want to fool us maybe you shouldn’t use the exact same phrases that you used on previous posts while using a different handle. Clumsy, man, very clumsy.
Real hipster haters don’t rank on fellow hipster haters. And when you assume your enemy is stupid you win the fight for him.
hypocrite, try applying this logic to yourself
Come again, your “logic” escapes us all. Now come back with several paragraphs just like you know who.
4fingerriff, ignore this fool. Obviously he’s faking and doing it for attention. There IS a reason why the saying “stop feeding the troll” exists.
But Robes, MD Burbs, Barega, FUWI and I are having fun playing with the little turd! He keeps revealing himself even after we tell him how he’s doing it. I’ll feed the troll as long as I pick the menu, a shit sandwich.
Locally produced, organic and fair trade ingredients.
Come on, you had to have made this video, it just plays into your hand too well!
Dumb ass in the video scared himself shitless with his beard on fire.
I have a suggestion for the next one: Russian Roulette with a Colt 45.
This is so stupid. Really stupid. Unbelievably stupid.
And yes…they are in Crown Heights now. I just think it’s funny how badly they stand out when they’re riding their fixies down Fulton, Nostrand, or Utica Ave.
4finger riff,
I am not a troll you fucking stupid asswipe. you cannot imagine the amount of hatred i have for hipsters. everywhere i go i see motherfucking men dressed in v necks and skinny jeans that it makes me sick. i don’t think you have ever seen this much abuse in a blog against hipsters which is why you go around saying stupid things like i am troll. go fuckyourself you motherfucking dickhead!
Ha ha ha ha ha! First you come back as dsfdsfdsf…etc, get caught, change your handle to hatehipster without changing your style or dropping the caps and the biggest give away, you stop posting as Needy Ned. Weak.
Fucking hell man, what can i do to convince you that i am not a troll? I hate hipsters just as much as you do.
Go away?
Same to you dickhead.
Same to you? What’s next, “so’s yer old man”, “yer mudda wears army shoes”?
To quote Batman, “Yes, and she found them very comfortable.”
Nothing, because you are a troll.
and you are an asswipe.
That’s as-wee-pay!
Stevie, Stevie, Stevie,
Is old age catching up with you already? How’s it feel going on 36 with no college degree and no meaningful job? No Comp-Sci degree, just a couple of failed mail-order diplomas and a shitty art school. How’s daddy’s penis-pill business coming along?
Bet your redhead is happily married by now to a real man and has kids already.
First, I’m willing to bet 4finger is not going to return the attraction you clearly have for him. We get that you have some sort of bromance going on in your own head, but it takes two and you’ve only got one…you.
Second, you’re getting rilly, rilly lazy, like yahhh. Don’t copy and paste blocks of previously submitted ‘replies’ ( cough ). If you’re going to hang around nagging everyone like the little kid that can’t make friends of his own and so pesters the older kids, I doubt anyone will put much effort into booting you.
However, if you insist on hanging around there’s every possibility that even if you are casually spoken to, you will be seriously ignored.
Now beat it. Nobody cares about your Oh!pinions.
Honestly, I imagine myself as Bruce Campbell from Evil Dead 2 (one of the greatest movies ever made) where I have a chainsaw attached to my hand and my boomstick ready to do what Ash does to Henrietta, but to hipsters.
Brooklyn didn’t have its own grooming product? What, do other cities each have one of their vewy vewy own? Typical hipster pud-pulling.
I just wanna personally decapitate anyone who describes anything as “very brooklyn”- totally maxes out the hipster bullshit meter
Cameron Diaz used the forerunner of this in “There’s Something About Mary”
I’m surprised that someone doesn’t put two and two together and market mustache wax made from genuine artisanal beeswax from city hives to fleece the Joshes…
That’s what they slather on their Sippy Straw-like legs to facilitate putting on skinny chick jeans.
It doesn’t look like she has a Kickstarter, but here’s one you can get in on: custom skinny jeans,.
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1852852842/custom-hand-made-jeans-in-williamsburg-brooklyn?ref=card
Good god, that retard doesn’t even know a fart about pattern making!
Those jeans are farther from a correct fit than good old baggy pants and they look like they were sewn by a total beginner – i’ve sewn better stuff when i was 12.
These guys raised 75k for a Mason Jar Cocktail shaker.
http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/556156026/the-mason-jar-cocktail-shaker
http://s3.amazonaws.com/ksr/assets/000/077/204/69e620ff35967b72b3f8bef0b6ff5b52_large.png?1342754020
You mean they helped the Colombian drug mafia launder $75k.
25 backers pledged $1 or more.
12 backers pledged $5 or more.
1434 backers pledged $30 or more.
244 backers pledged $50 or more.
That’s drug money, no question about it. I’ll bet those mason jars are already produced in China for pennies to the dollar. They’ll buy just enough to satisfy their genuine donors ($1 to $5) and the rest won’t complain.
Since their own share will probably go on coke anyway, it’s win-win all the way (for the Colombians).
All this “from Brooklyn”. “Brooklyn-based”, pseudo-creative, whimsical olde time packaged yuppie crap being pawned off to these hyper-pretentious interloping frauds is so fucking played out already. Those bearded try-hard pussies are so thrilled to have the quirky asian “Mackenzie” touch their chinless, pubic-haired jaws that they will dish out more of the parental allowance they received that week to this skank. I’m sure Mackenzie and her filth oils are their new drug and one more drain on their parents’ 401k money. Christ, don’t they ever do anything interesting with their unearned money? It’s all so played out, predictable and lame. Worthless mutants.
Yeah baby! A classic Mr B rant. LOL
Listening to this nasty gentrifying twit talk urges me to drag her jaw across the grating of the Brooklyn Bridge.
If you’re going to film a promotional video for your grooming line, don’t have nasty-ass chipped nail polish on. Who wants to buy grooming products from someone whoc an’t even groom for their big video? Gag!
Yes but those AK-47 earrings are like totally making an artistic statement.
She’s like protesting mean people, and like people with guns and stuff.
I’m banking she’s never fired a gun in her life.
No, but I’ll bet she picks her nose…
Considering that these people are also rabid anti-gun and believe the world can settle things peacefully all the time.
Beliefs brought on as a result of strychnine poisoning. Stay away from the cinnamon rat cakes.
Here is a beardo that needs his beard oiled, and ignited. http://www.etsy.com/listing/102934802/white-peacock-feather-necklace-long-and
There is something sickeningly perverse about those close-up shots of the mouths and beards. They look like orifices of another sort.
It’s fucking disgusting beard porn. These people make me sick. Also love how she quirkily didn’t manicure her nails for extra urban hipster cred. These maggots are so predictable and played out. When does it end?
When the next major financial collapse occurs. These fauxhemian interpretive toenail art connoisseurs are like an ant colony. Kill the queen (Mommy and Daddy shutting down the financial lifesource) and the drones will also die. The only downside is that they’ll be stuck here. Could always use them for landfill or pier pilings, I guess.
Kill the queen…LMFAOOOOO!
That was great. The only thing they are missing is why inappropriate beards are hip now. It’s only bc they all live next to the jews in williamsburg & they were all JEALOUS that they had to shave & the jews didn’t so they all went for it. Pissed off the bear gays too. Annoying
They should make a line of natural oils to keep Molly’s “down there” beard from spreading well beyond the normal pubis areas up to her fat inny belly button then across her huge vegan thighs around to the huge continental divide she calls and ass that has also expanded exponentially from the strict vegan and artisinal gluten free cupcakes diet.
This is the way you sell a useless product, not some lameass kickstarter video
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=68JX7bBo5iw&w=640&h=480%5D
sorry, didn’t embed
LMAO!!!! Great find!
“it’s insane! I know I chopped somebody with it the other day!” LOL awesome
“Reader report: Man arrested for having dog on L train platform”
Take a look at the picture. A crowd of Calebs and Megans. Like Yah. DB dog owner has the scarf, of course. Boy, the L train really sucks these day.”
http://evgrieve.com/2012/10/reader-report-man-arrested-for-having.html
Let me guess… hipster with rescue pit bull? Shocking. That’s all you see around here. Every new Ethan & Molly comes with their new rescue pit(or two).
There aren’t enough fatal maulings of these Beardopenerdo Da Linguinilimbs dog owners at the jaws of these canines to suit me. I’ll have to look into this.
how arrogant can you be? this dirtbag really thinks this is an argument he’s going to win?
this isn’t a local cop back in your suburb who tolerates your bullshit attitude because your daddy is on the town planning board and has to deal with him if he ever wants a building permit.
when the cop tells you to move it, move it. a simple rule for city life, that could save your life.
I wish someone with animation skillz could do a cartoon of McKenzie Whippenpoof splashing some Gowanus #5 on a hipster’s face and then show his skin peeling off his face while he says “Like yah…that’s got the scent of a dive bar bathroom mixed with the astringent power of hydrochloric acid. I’ll take a case!”
Better than all the niggers!!!!
I am glas they were displaced.
http://www.stormfront.org
Something tells me that in a forum of immigrant-friendly folks who are dismayed at the gentrification of hard-working Polish New Yorkers, among other immigrant groups, that neo-Nazis are not exactly going to be popular here. Why don’t you make like your Great Leader and kill yourself? Just don’t pull a J.T. Ready, or get shot by your own kid like Jeff Hall!
FBI plant. We’re not buying it…
So where’s Jen(trifier) to witness this hipster racism? She only bitches when it’s convenient…
Oh, Jentrifoccacio? She’s scrolling through past postings looking for a certain Anglo Saxon word meaning “cleft, aperture, elliptical opening, slit”.
In hindsight, it would’ve been better to have kept my statements about her gender neutral, and not give her a reason for the selective, self-righteous, false indignation that hipsters and hipster wannabes are so well known for.
That’s the best option, truth be told. Besides, it’s so much more fun watching her bash her toes into the furniture, over and over, just so she has something to whine about all day.
Eh, it was entertaining to watch her self-destruct.
I don’t think this is from any official entity. I suspect that this is one of the usual hipster trolls, trying to get someone to endorse this bullshit, just so they can tattle “See? I told you they were Nazis!” (As “Mad” magazine pointed out three decades ago, “Why do Ku Klux Klansmen wear white robes? It’s to hide the fact that underneath, they’re wearing dresses.”)
Shaddup you.
Get a life, you boring mid-20th-century-central-European-history nerd.
Obvious troll is obvious.
If anything, that stands as a very good example of why this site is NOT and will not be shut down.
Too many hipsters are also Alex Jones programmed and so, of course, smell a conspiracy in every bar of soap. I’m sure there’s some suspicion that DH is a secret cabal of…oh nevermind, I can’t be bothered explaining this shit to ANOTHER deluded cornhole engaging in the WILLFUL SUSPENSION OF DISBELIEF.
These dingbats need to read a book called ‘The Shadow University’ and find out ‘the reals’ for their immense verbal sensitivities. Once they realize which rights were REALLY taken from them and why, it’s not gonna be Wall St. they protest.
Hey, new Pizzeria in Williamsburg, probably sucks……no….picture looks like real pizza……gotta be something wrong….good looking pizza……Ah! There it is……$4 a slice!!! WTF? A slice of pizza has always costed what a subway ride does. It’s a NYC law! Only in NewHipster Brooklyn can they break this law and charge $4 dollars for a slice of pizza. They fuck up everything they touch
http://gothamist.com/2012/10/13/check_out_these_pies_from_new_south.php#photo-1
sorry, forgot the link
What the Hell is an “artisinal soda”? Yoo-Hoo?
Ernst and Mordechai, the stupid, yet completely clueless denizens of Olive St., prepare another batch of their signature beverage, “Yah-Huh?”, a quirky artisanal methadone-flavored drink. They show their concern for the environment by blowing recycled beer carbonation through straws into each and every bottle before it is corked. This method is also cheaper than buying CO2 tanks.
Nice.
I bet they’ve also got a line of ‘Yah-DMT’ out.
Slices should be $2 to $2.50 max. Throw in a soda for a buck and you have a $5 lunch.
Not for nothing, Di Fara’s, on Ave. J, has been charging five bucks a slice for the last three or so years. I like pizza; I don’t like it enough to fork over that kind of gelt for a fucking slice. Try Carmine’s, on Norman Ave. in Greenpoint. Still $2.25 a slice and is the best slice in North Brooklyn. Anna Maria Pizza on Bedford is the equivalent of a White Castle belly bomber, something to soak up the night’s alcohol. That’s why it’s popular with the spider leg-armed Hummuses and Montegues before they throw up in somebody’s hallway.
$5 is ridiculous. The cost of a large pie is maybe $5-$6. So they’re getting $40 on an 8 slice pie? FUGGEDABOUTIT!
30 bucks for a fucking plain pie. They cater to the same pretentious douchebags who stand on line for hours outside Lucali, on Carroll Street, and the phony Grimaldi’s near Fulton (or is it Futon now) Landing. It not whether the pizza is any good; these dopes go because it’s an “event”. You could slap some Ragu on a piece of cardboard and sprinkle shredded government cheese on it and, as long as there’s at least one “Z” list celebutard waiting to get in, the momos will rave about how the wonderful and quirky mix of ingredients sets this pizza above the rest.
$30 for a goddamn plain pizza? For that price, it had better give you superpowers.
It’s so good it might!
Hey look Dominick is getting up there in age, and he makes The best pizza I have ever tasted. He uses top ingredients, no Polly O here, and that top of line imported stuff costs money. His large pie definitely costs him more than $5-6 bucks to make.(extra Virgin olive oil, fresh mozz, fresh basil, San Marzano Tomatoes etc.) Charging higher prices also allows him to close two days a week to recharge his batteries, as he is no spring chicken. I go to Di Faras once a month with some friends and it costs us $20 each to have the best pizza on the planet. If you don’t want to pay it fine but don’t be hating on Dominick and DiFaras as he is a true Brooklyn legend and an artist (a real one) to boot.
If you haven’t had his Sicilian slice I feel for you. It’s sort of priceless.
Charging more for something doesn’t mean what you’re getting is better. It just means that the guy selling knows there are enough suckers walking around to buy into the hype. Carmine, in Greenpoint, uses the same ingredients as does Dominick. The difference is, he doesn’t gouge his customers. Carmine is also the same age as Dom. Carmine is behind the counter seven days a week making pies, garlic knots, calzones and just about everything else. The New York Pizza Project, started by five regular slobs from New York, searched the entire city for the best pizza places in each borough. Carmine’s was selected as one of the top three joints in Brooklyn. The other two aren’t DiFara’s, Grimaldi’s or Lucali’s.
By the bye, pally, your particular phraseology and descriptors, like “priceless” and “artist”, to describe a guy making pies, makes me believe that you lean to the nasally, kazoo-voiced, Mr. Salty-physiqued, pretentious Like, yah-stafarian food fetishist camp.
Yeah Joe priceless is an off limits word now, whatever.
And the artist was thrown in there because I knew a jerkoff like you wouldn’t get it.
You half assed pizza eating fuck!
Does that work for you?
Oh yeah The New york Pizza eating project is run by a bunch of parentally funded asswipes from Minesconsin. Check yourself.
Actually he does use Polly-O. they make the curd that 90% of all cheesemakers use to make fresh mozz.
FINALLY someone wrote ‘pie’ instead of ‘pizza’!!! Wherever I’ve gone that’s one of THE true hallmarks of a NY native ( besides the accent lol ) and that’s the use of ‘pie’. I don’t trust ANYONE’S opinion about pizza who does not naturally use the word ‘pie’ instead. EoS.
Hipster glasses in a new Discover card commercial.
Pause frame at :09 seconds and look at that face. Why would any man aspire to that?
Perhaps they’re like the cargo cultists in the South Pacific who believe the white man’s “goggles” actually make them smarter and reveal the source of the modern goods that they believe magically appear without factories and workers. You know, like hipsters don’t think iPads are made in China by oppressed laborers.
Like yah, no they’re so not. They’re fair trade because, um, like, heh, I give the dude in the iCrap boutique, like $9000 and he, like, gives me one. That’s, like, a fair trade. Yaaaaaah. I riiiiiiiilly so don’t understand why the dude would say I remind him of, like, a lollipop?
1. Low self esteem combined with masochistic delusions about being anally raped by Joy Behar.
2. He’s a complete dickhead.
3. 1 and 2.
The smirk is what gets me. Every last one of these dweebs cries “Why do they hate us? They must be jealous!” It never once occurs to them that those smirks would make a nun take up smoking cigars, just so she could put out the cigars in their eyes all day long.
I’d love to staple him onto one of those bullseye targets used at the BB machine gun arcade in Coney, hand the carnie a C-note and tell him to keep loading it until I shoot this smarmy fuck’s face clean off.
http://www.dailylife.com.au/news-and-views/dl-opinion/in-defence-of-the-hipster-male-20121012-27hgg.html
We have them here in Australia too unfortunately
Great comment from that article:
“The amount of ‘hipsters’ of either sex riding around without helmets while they run red lights and weave between cars is alarming. I’m not so worried about them being injured or killed as much as the increase in my insurance premiums.”
I fear that article was written by one of those ‘special’ types of hipsters who believes David Icke is an intellectual god and so, there really are reptiles from the 4th dimension living today in human form. Notice the article starts out using the word ‘reptilian’ in reference to hipster criticism.
I posted a vid on here of some fucktwit named Ian who’s been taping himself mentally masturbating during a series of what I can only reckon are tremorous nervous breakdowns usually intensifying when funds run out, and he’s hooked up with some other beardo who posted a vid of some conference chat. Totally straight faced and serious talking about how it’s their job to raise our collective consciousness so the lizard people don’t ‘win’. I don’t know what lizards ‘win’. I always thought it was insects, but apparantly they can run secret cabals and time travel too.
And hipsters wonder why we’re concerned…..geez…
i loved the bit about “manhattan people are set on their path, whereas brooklyn people are so *transitional*”… ie trustifarian wankers in search of an identity.
Seriously, eat dick.
Hipsters from Flyoverlandia are bad enough but apparently McKenzie Santiago is originally from L.A., one of THE world’s major spawning grounds for hipsters.
Soo….lemme see…You have to live in Brooklyn to make beard oil?
Beards – at least full ones are unsanitary. it’s the thing you wash the least, gets food and dandruff caught in it, acts as a filter cigarettes and now you’re gonna add oil to the mix?
Nice.
You couldn’t pay me to run my hands through those filthy beards. I don’t even want to know where its been.
Selling beard cream to dirty hipsters, what a joke. This video could totally be a parody produced by die hipster. The funny part is it is not. These people are serious.
Check out the picture of these assclowns…it’s priceless !
http://www.brooklynpaper.com/stories/35/41/24_bushwickbookclub_2012_10_12_bk.html
Carnies Gone Wild: Bushwick
I can’t wait to see what they do for William S. Burroughs.
She “just loves the smell of wood”. I can just hear Beavis and Butthead laughing. “You said ‘wood’. Heh heh. Heh heh.”
Sorry – I posted before scrolling down and reading similar comments. Oh well, great minds think alike.
So do tiny ones, like hatehipster, Ned, Stevie, Trey etc. Because they are the same tiny minded little poser.
UGH. I have a better idea – just shave off those filthy, soup-encrusted beards.
go to 0:35, says ‘Classic Beardo’
I threw up in my mouth.
The idea of touching those filthy masses of hair that they call beards is repulsive! I am complete disgusted right now and my skin is crawling! I love that her name is MacKenzie, too–perfect for an urban hipster who caters to the beard trade because it’s her “Rushmore.”
Of course Mackenzie has vocal fry – the other important hipster accessory
I just saw this now. I wish I could puke in her beard oil and then all of the hipsters would have puke-scented beards. Can I do that?