As we head into the weekend I’ll leave you with another recent masterful performance by Matthew Silver – performance artist extraordinaire. Below the video will be things that equally talentless hipsters would say in Matthew’s defense.
Things transplant hipsters would say in Baby Matthew’s defense:
“Aww, leave him alone. He’s just doing what he loves!”
“Matthew brings a smile to my face whenever I see him. Thanks Matthew!”
“At least he’s brave enough to do what he does – I’d like to see you do that”
“We need more care-free, spiritual people like Matthew – it would make this city a better place”
“You’re just jealous of him”
“Don’t listen to them Matthew! Keep doing what you do. Haters gonna hate.”
“I love zany New Yorkers like Matthew”
I refuse to even watch his videos, sorry. I just can’t be bothered with it after getting a taste of the last one. If it were possible to taste garbage by watching video, I’d still be rinsing my mouth out.
He’s an ugly, bipolar dude in a speedo, nothing more.
This.
I’ve seen performance art. This is not performace art. This is nothing more than talentless, unvarnished ego.
Hey Robes, guess who popped up last night, told me I was from Ohio and ran away. I can imagine him slamming his laptop shut and shouting (with fist pump) ” I got the last word! I win, I win!
But HE’s probably from Ohio (or some other Midwestern state, anyway) too! Maybe he thinks he’s something special because he’s in The Big City now.
He’ll probably end up like those creeps who think they like living life on the edge and move from the suburban Midwest to Las Vegas (my current residence) to live The Las Vegas Lifestyle, wind up getting the living shit kicked out of them by it, and slink back home with their tails between their legs – or worse. Happens every day.
The moral? Be careful what you wish for – it just might come true. Even in Brooklyn.
Vegas and Ohio.
Lulz
I see why you guys spend so much time worrying about hipsters.
Right, because both places are SO similar!
The flyover brothers.
Shouldn’t you dudes be worried about like meth or cows?
You’re a city boy now Ned!
Quite an audience you’ve cultivated here. Bunch of hard boiled old school New Yorkers.
Fuck you.
End of story.
You wouldn’t like it, Joe – Jerry Sandusky says he just lies there.
Don’t forget obsessed internet stalkers like you, Edd.
And shouldn’t you be answering the question about your cowardly hypocracy I asked you days ago. Really indicates your lack of character and cut and run method.
How bout them Browns? Pretty brutal. Or are you a Bengals man? I’ll be sure to keep reading your blowhard commentary about neighborhoods you know nothing about.
Avoiding the issue again, are you? COWARD.
Who the fuck was talking about football? Stay on topic and answer the question that focused your butt hurt on Robes and me.
Meth? only “hipsters” and white trash do meth around here. And “cows”? In Southern NEVADA? Let me see … what was that quote? Oh yeah: “I’ll be sure to keep reading your blowhard commentary about neighborhoods you know nothing about.”
Pure genius. You keep settin’ ‘em up, Neddie-laddie, and we’ll keep knockin’ ‘em down.
Cows was for your Ohio brother in arms genius.
Yeah when I have questions regarding the gaming industry, white trash, meth or upside down mortgages, I’m going to totally going to listen to what you have to say.
Brooklyn, not so much.
How’s your old Penn Sate pal, Mr Sandusky? Shame what happened to him, isn’t it?
But YOU DON’T HAVE ANY QUESTIONS. You ALREADY KNOW IT ALL. That’s how we know that YOU’RE A FAKE AND A PHONY.
Hey city boy! You fit right in! Don’t ya?
3 months, and it’s like he’s lived there HIS WHOLE LIFE! The manchild’s an URBAN GOD!
Oh yes, and a FRAUD. Sorry; didn’t mean to short-change you, sunshine.
pfr frow a [[pair]] of fuckin balls and merely answer the question that was put to you several times already and non answered, as if you’re paul Bunyan when re are really just a weeping will. let me tell you something ou amateure, you bony little overkill manow a pair of big balls Ned and see if you can’t hunker down tih that massive and superio brain to take th eearlier challges put forth to you vy. What upsets you most my dead nead: your awful feeing that you really not gifted enough to even begin to address the questions put to beforehand, before your immense butt hirt. Change your mind Sir, rise to the challenge or disgrace yourself on thei board forever. At which point we will come up with a more horrible nickname y0ou could ever imagine and the meme will follow you wereever your stilted thinking goes to bothers elsewhere, but hey, thanks for the larff Ned and hope your little poke and run game becomes as painfully boring to you to write as it is for us to read. Next mission Ned is simply this one: answer the questions that others here have put to you, or get the fuck out. See how these things work yet?
Let me help you…you come back with something snarky, you continue ignore questions put to you, in very civil terms, and so instantlyu identifiy yourself with ther Bourgeiosse whoops…….it appears the cognac has indeed kicked in and I must away elsewhere. if I happen to stumble into a bed
Where you from Ned? I question how much you really know about Brooklyn and New York. Your name alone indicates your Brooklyn knowledge is extremely limited.
WORRY about “hipsters”? I thought there was no such thing as a “hipster.”
I don’t “worry” about talentless, egotistical assholes – I’m sick and tired of them trying to force their ideals on me because they think they’re so much BETTER than any ideals I could possibly have. I don’t want to live my life like them. I don’t care about anything they care about. I don’t like them getting in my face with their silly antics. I despise their smugness and superiority complexes, particularly because they have nothing to be smug or feel superior about. Their drug use and alcoholism in the name of creativeness is boring. Their music is lame. Their art is rubbish. Besides, “Ned” you’re just “goofing” with us, right? Only children goof. And only assholes “goof” on their parent’s dime.
Or maybe your parents are as much assholes as you are?
Hey Robes, do you have a big dairy operation in downtown Vegas? Trail drives through the casinos? Needy seems to think so.
I hope the Ned-atollah hops into a phone booth, pops another Xanax, and changes into another one of his secret identities – like “Bryce Allen,” or “Zach from Ohio,” or “Esmerelda Godington,” the medicine cabinet junkie. It’s always more exciting when he has all of his multiple personalities on display. You get Ned and Matthew Silver together and you’d have a whole chorus line in two bodies.
Ned’s either waiting for the drugs to kick in … or maybe he’s over at Cain’s Tavern, ROUNDING UP REINFORCEMENTS TO GO AFTER THOSE MEAN CREATIVE-KID-HATING GUYS OVER ON DIE HIPSTER!!!
Heh. Five’ll get’cha 10 that he’ll get distracted by the “Buy a Friend a Drink” board and forget what he was doing.
Yeah Robes, Needy focuses on states of origin, but weren’t we all born in the same state? Naked and screaming. But really if it’s so important to him why does he refuse to identify his home state? Must be ashamed of where he comes from and that is so sad.
He has totally relinquished his past. Baptized in the Gowanus, he is nothing but a BROOKLYNITE now! As I said previously – Manchild is an URBAN GOD!
Actually, with all the aliases he uses at various times, I would imagine that his mystique is that he is from all states, yet no state (other than an altered state of consciousness), all at the same time. A remarkable feat for someone of such middling talents.
The other hilarious thing about him is that he assumes that since I live in Las Vegas now, I’ve always lived in Las Vegas, or at least Nevada. He’s never been more wrong about anything in his brief, pitiful little life. Where I’ve lived, what I’ve done, the things that I have seen; they would frighten the little man. Scary world, sunshine; very scary indeed.
Where are you, Smeg – oops, I mean “Ned”? I miss your blowhard commentary about people you know nothing about.
Looks like he ran away again, Robes, I’ll fill in for him. YOU’RE FROM VEGAS SO YOU ONLY KNOW ABOUT COWS! YOU’RE A COWARD BECAUSE YOU POST ANONYMOUSLY! JUST LIKE ME! YOU’RE A TOWNIE! NO WAIT, YOU’RE NOT A TOWNIE! I’M TOTALLY SERIOUS THAT I’M JUST GOOFING!
There man, will that hold you?
Naah – his mom called him upstairs for dinner. Hasta wash up first. Germs, y’know.
The fact that I just finished eating prevents me from watching his vids. If you’ve seen one “performance” video of his, you’ve seen them all. The exception was the one where the dude tossed his stage props around and caused Mr. Silver some serious butthurt.
Despite the surreallist zany hipster performance exterior, Matthew’s face & scraggly beard hint at the mental imbalance that have truly permeated his hipster brain. I see nothing but homelessness & heavy meds in his future
OK, I will dissent a bit here. I don’t see Matt Silver as a hipster, but more as being part of the hipster milieu if you will. Matt Silver is less a hipster and just a deranged a deranged moron. I really don’t think he knows any better. The really odious part are his supports/fan club/hangers on, of which hipsters constitute a large percentage (the remainder, like Silver, simply have a screw loose). Hipsters are Matt Silver’s enablers.
Ugh, really wish this had an edit function…
Why hasn’t anyone videotaped this Silly String-physiqued waste of inbred DNA being beaten to death with an artisanally restored vintage fixie? Now, that’s entertainment!
I’ll buy that for a dollar!
Dibs on syndication rights on Fox!
Or get continously kicked by one of those Rube Goldberg wagon wheels that has a depression era work boot tied to every spoke.
What saddens me most is how street performance has deteriorated. Watching this half wit
reminds of a kid that used to busk in front of Madison Square Gardenin the 80′s, around the corner from where I used to work. He would show up with a strat and a Pig Nose amp and whip out the most amazing Hendrix, Zep and Beck you ever heard.
We would actually go there at lunch to listen to him.
And now we have Matt Silver.
“reminds of a kid that used to busk in front of Madison Square Gardenin the 80′s, around the corner from where I used to work. He would show up with a strat and a Pig Nose amp and whip out the most amazing Hendrix, Zep and Beck you ever heard.”
Was it that kid Nikki, from the band Sun? He was one of the best guitarists I ever heard – he busked constantly to practice, and then he just disappeared. Sad thing is that hipsters of today would say “And what? He couldn’t CAPTIALIZE on his talent?”, then get all smug, snickery and superior – while they’re living off weekly cash infusions from The Bank of Mom ‘n’ Dad.
I’ll say it again: Jerk De Soleil.
This what happens when cousins marry.
LOL!!!!
Good Morning Pests!
Brooklyn Paper is at it again. Today it has a cartoon of a “Bushwick Bar where everyone knows your name”!
http://www.brooklynpaper.com/stories/35/41/bp_barscrawl_2012_10_12_bk.html#feedback
Lets post some hipster names up there!
Oh yeah. on it like flies on shit. heh.
Oh, and speaking of Ethan and Megan. This weeks New York has an article about 9 people living in a loft. Page 58, first line “this is Ethans room, # 6 is Megans”
Can’t make this stuff up
What a jerk off. Never has there been a more deserving place for a hipster beating. Shezuss.
I know that cube probably weighs thousands of pounds, but it would be ironic in a non-hipster, totally accidental NYC way if a Snapple truck lost its brakes and slammed into it thereby scrunching Matthew and his drummer down to the size of shoe leather. End of story.
Even better: remember that scene in the original Taking of Pelham One-Two-Three when the police car carrying the ransom money crashes and flips? It happened roughly right where the Art Star is prancing. If only we could get a movie-time-machine…
I spent my early childhood right down the block from that corner. Every time I see crap like this it makes me mourn for NYC. Such a degradation of a once-great town.
Agreed. I spent a lot of time there also. I pass there now and it’s a god damned circus. Protesters, zany acts, vendors and tourists. I miss it just being a park. I’ve seen this guy many times and I just dont “get it” I guess. I was around your neck of the woods for a function over the weekend and it was raining so it was kind of quiet. However I’ve been going through the 5 stages of grief ever since. Don’t know if I’ll ever get to that final one.
I’ll never get over it. How can I? This is my home. I pray for rain every weekend.
Here’s a few pics of what Kent Avenue and N. 6 & 7th looked like before they destroyed the waterfront with condos. After pic #031 you can see the towers coming up. I miss the sky and the light. I don’t like crowds, especially the crowds here now.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/46896052@N00/7592002108/in/set-72157630623569936/
That’s what I remember. When I worked at the Pratt institute I used to do parties at the Pratt House/mansion after Dr. Schutte took it over and kicked out the students and I remember a conversation with the benefactors around 1996 I think. They were discussing buying cheap on anything that was waterfront and how they were gonna make a fortune. I couldn’t picture this at the time but after being there over the weekend I see that they were spot on. I’m not a conspiracy theorist but there was an awful lot of political/real estate magnate collusion now that I think back.
Real estate, in particular commercial real estate, and local politics ALWAYS go hand in hand. ALWAYS. And in there, you will find a lawyer or two on the kickback or full ownership on the cheap themselves. You can tell a lot about who the land masters in your area are by checking out, for examle, Rotary Club memberships and such.
This is why when you’re the buyer, you have to look at surrounding development, city platt’s etc etc, and see what the other land owners around you have planned for the future because it may not be to your long term benefit. It amazes me how many people fail to consider these sorts of things. But just try to hold some eager buyer back! LOL They forget the first word when they see a place advertised: Research.
Oh well.
You know what the rent was on our apartment on St. Mark’s Place in the East Village was in 1965? $41.00 a month.
I commented further down when someone mentioned Kennys Castaways and it’s recent closing. The bottom line was that the newer residents wanted a quieter block and the rents have gone through the roof. I went to the Rock and Roll hall of fame on a class trip a few years ago in Soho and there’s a replica model of where all the famous clubs used to be. Kinda sad to see that most of them used to be before Bloomberg turned this place into an elite playground. Instead of real talent having a place to come and show off their craft we now have to settle for these damn phony bastards. All in the name of greed.
Good stuff, kid – looks like the neighborhood I grew up around North & Clybourn (900 miles west of there) before they put in a Whole Paycheck and yup-scale shopping mall, tore down most of the buildings with character and built stacked-up condos, two-to-a-25′-lot, four stories tall, to take their place. That sort of shit’s heartbreaking; it was almost a relief when Mom passed a few years ago, knowing I wouldn’t have to go back and see how developers ruined the place, all in the name of profits. Assholes.
Narcissistic psycho fuck…
i’ll give him this, its pretty damn tough to achieve such a seismic blend of boring and unfunny.
“Seismic blend of boring and unfunny,” eh? I’m DIGGIN’ it.
I think it’s so nice of Matthew to do a show for tourists, the only people who can appreciate his “ART”. I love the fact that ‘real New Yorkers’ look very embarrassed as they walk very quickly the fuck away.
I’m truly disappointed in the total lack of roving packs of feral youths who, in days gone by, would’ve used Matthew as a human pinata. They would’ve beat his ass from Astor Place to Tompkins Square Park. Too much of this “civility” stuff……
More like PoPo on every corner in the entire LES and North Brooklyn. Must protect the cash cows.
Me and my classmates used to have a camcorder (back in the…) and we used to make little music videos that were just about zipping through the radio stations. Act out things, jump up and down. But like 6 of us just filming ourselves using strobe effects for fun and shit. We thought it was really corny. But fun to do and laugh about it then.
We were about 13 years old.
Where are the little kids that should be throwing rocks at this herb at? Thats how you know that these folks are rich and sheltered. If you’d be pulling some shit like this out in Jersey City (before gentrification) you are guaranteed to get ass fucked up by some little kids out of disgust.
LMAO @ “herb” havent heard that in a while.
What a cunt.
He’s not a cunt. Cunts serve a purpose.
Hey! I was gonna call him a cunt. But Joe is right. How about cancer? Matt is cancer. That doesn’t serve a purpose. Cunt cancer?
Can’t. Unsee. Matthew’s. Package
LOL I tried to warn you! ROFL
Somebody needs to tell that guy to put the potato in the back of his underwear, not the front. And a Hipster Remediation ProTip – find that clown who appeared to put money in some sort of tip jar and go Private Pyle (from Full Metal Jacket) on him. When you leave scraps out to feed a rat or a roach, you’ll wake up one day with one hell of an infestation. Oh well, as long as it isn’t in my neighborhood, I don’t care.
Look at his other videos on you tube yo. He swears he’s down.
Uh-uh. The last time that psycho asshole was on here was the last hit he’ll ever get from me. Why doesn’t somebody call the cops so he can get a much-deserved rest in the Bellevue rubber room?
http://www.blockmagazine.com/block_stock_barrel.php?title=lstronggbrooklyn_kickballl_strongg&more=1&c=1&tb=1&pb=1
God I wish I’d never heard of kickball…
Ever notice that while they’re always thrilled to “bring back” kickball, you never see any Bombardment games? It couldn’t have anything to do with memories of being pegged between the shoulder blades by someone with basic hand-eye coordination and a wicked overhand, could it?
I think they know if they get hit they’ll fall apart like a snot-filled Kleenex.
They said softball was too competitive.
I’d love to see what would happen to them in a Bombardment game.
I wish neckbeards never heard of Brooklyn. Or, any place east of Nebraska.
Keeping your kid away from Starbuck’s?
Man, it’s almost like someone is manufacturing them and letting them loose in the wild…wait a minute…naah.
“Welcome to show business, MORONS!”
Best line of all!
I have to say, I like this Matthew character. This city has become so boring in the past decade that anything like this is welcome. I wouldn’t classify him as a hipster at all. Hipsters are usually the ones taking the videos of him doing his thing, whatever that is. There’s a big difference between what this guy is doing and a couple Urban Outfitters playing the flute somewhere.
Well, I don’t like Matthew, but I agree that I am not sure he deserves to be classified as a hipster. It’s the crowd that follows him who are the real issue.
You right. He’s a nut.
I remember being about 14, around the time the 1st “Scary Movie” came out and everyone and their mother was screaming “WhhaaZzuupp!?” – me and my friends took my mom’s camcorder and were filming ourselves doing whatever it is a 14 yr old likes to do on a school night somewhere in midtown when we heard a very large crowd behind us and turned around – it was about 50 people dressed as the same clown who all stopped and screamed “WHHAaaZuupp!?!!?” and kept following us and doing it if we turned around. After a block they just sort of latched onto some Asian tourists going the other direction and followed them doing the same thing. That has been my experience with performance art and I guess I like it as long as its 50 Hispanic people dressed as the same clown.
Like yah, it’s everyone’s favorite kidult!! Wonder when Baby Matthew is going to re-post the video of his shit getting tossed around by a real New Yorker while he wasn’t man enough to do anything about it?
“I love zany New Yorkers like Matthew” – It makes me nauseous to think about it, but I guarantee there are plenty of idiot tourists stupid enough to actually think this while they are looking for the Sex and The City tour bus to go to Magnolia for cupcakes.
Why doesn’t someone take a home made carpet gun to this guy’s ‘nads?
ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART….
Shoot him in the balls with a hunting arrow…all these jerks want to by-pass the Study-Research-hard Work and sacrifice of becoming a Real artist that has something to offer the world– go straight to the center of attention -notoriety part..without paying any dues..this is what happens when all the real artists and real musicians are priced out of nyc –and the leisure class remittance -men trust funders take over.
What’s up with the topless woman around 3:40? a performance within a performance
I fucking hate speedos..any male that wears one in public is a CREEP!!!
In the vid of the man casually strolling through his ‘act’ and kicking his props around, it looks as if he’s actually wearing Underoos, which I found an even more disgusting idea than speedos. Either way, dude’s got ‘Future Wack Ward Resident’ written all over him.
I know, I know….I’m ‘mean’…..
The thing that scares me about Matthew Silver is that he is clearly mentally disturbed and allowed to just wander the streets. Dude’s a threat to himself and others. One day he is going to finally truly snap, kill someone, and prance around wearing their head as a hat.
There will then be a billions stories about how did we let this happen? What can we do to stop it? You could have stopped it by giving him the help he clearly needs. But because some beardos from Ohio call his insanity art he’s allowed out in population. So we all know who to blame on the next serial killer. HIPSTERS!
I meant… We all know who we can blame for creating the next serial killer.
Maybe. But I think he’s crazy in the same way, Dali, Duchamp and Magritte were insane. The difference is – those guys for the most part had talent. They didn’t bother anyone.
Matt is a functioning member of society but I think he suffers from some sort of Narcissism disorder. He always has to be the center of attentionwhich is why this manchild is always out in public annoying normal NY-ers. He makes mimes downright tolerable.
He needs to have the palms of his hands superglued to his face. Think of the entertainment value of watching him attempt to remove the lit M-80s shoved into his Speedo.
“They didn’t bother anyone.”
I dunno about that – dealing with Dali in person could be a pretty unnerving experience.
“He is a wild man. And I like wild men.” – Eszther Balint, “Stranger Than Paradise”
He is nowhere near and NOTHING like Dali or anyone in his class. If Matthew could paint a fucking cat as well as Dali could paint a forty foot tall canvas, I’d fly to NYC and give him an apology in person. But it ain’t gonna happen because he ain’t got it. He’s not even a pimple on the butt of the other artists you mentioned.
If someone of different ethnicity or darker skin pulled this off they would’ve been hauled in cuffs to Bellvue. Just one of the many disturbing things I’ve noticed with the influx of these flyover fuckers. Hell, it probably would’ve been reported to the authorities by a pasty ass Megan.
x100 ^
x1,000,000,000
I think I may have found a mate for our boy Matt:
http://www.xojane.com/issues/i-screamed-at-my-therapist-for-asking-about-my-short-skirt-and-then-got-sexually-harassed-a-mllion-times-so-maybe-he-was-right
Gah.. when did the world become full of crazy people. What happened to the normal people who just work and don’t bother everybody else
They’re not “crazy.” They just want attention so they can keep feeling as special as their mommies and daddies said they are.
Spouting a feminist manifesto at your therapist after drastically misinterpreting what they meant? Sorry, Al – but this one’s full-blown, bat-guano crazy.
Seriously… and who would even be turned on by that… thing?
That picture will keep me up at night. Why anyone would want to put their dick anywhere near that would stump even Einstein.
Is that flesh eating bacteria or just mould on her left arm? And what happened to her face???
That’s the result of 18 ga. wire-armed, armpit hair-bearded urban pioneers play Jacques Cousteau and explore the depths of the Gowanus Canal and Newtown Creek in the search for sunken caches of bicycle parts. Gotta love them PCBs.
I’ll bet she find happiness in marriage. Bwahahaha. 12 cats in 10 years, guaranteed. Thanks for the link.
She’s confusing sexual harassment for people laughing at her cankles and clown outfit.
Pretty standard attitude for the hipster set. “LOOK AT ME! LOOK AT MEEEE!” And then, “WAIT…WHY ARE YOU LOOKING AT ME? STOP JUDGING ME. SERIOUSLY, STOP LOOKING AT ME!” She and Mattie would make a perfect match!
i wish someone would turn a public brutal beating of him into performance art
I have to be honest. I don’t want him to get beaten. I don’t even want someone to smack him in the head. What I want is to drop him into a salt mine and leave him there, without an audience, for a month. I figure that he’ll think it’s a great adventure within five minutes, start crying for his mommy within an hour, and swear that he’ll behave for the rest of his life within a day. He’s then left there, with not so much as a fellow rat or cockroach for company, for the rest of the month to make sure that the lesson sinks in.
I agree. A satirical beating? Sure But I too don’t want to see the guy get hurt, either.
He needs to realize that no one gives a sh*t. I think maybe a few weeks in a psyche ward where everyone from the tin foil hat brigade, crouched in corners and screaming about
aliens, conspiracies, the phone police and how their uteruses are pipelines to the Kremlin.
This or actually hire him for shows and when he sees people starting uncomfortable at their shoes and he hears nothing but crickets, he’ll get the message.
“Broadway Danny Rose – Matt Silver on Line 2…”
People watch him, though. You see, when these beardos do their “shows” in the Midwest, no one stops to watch. But in NYC, he draws a crowd of tourists, and those crowds help me export our hipster problem to NYC. That fella in the video with the inordinately wide spread between his eyes who was toe tapping along with the beardo will go back home to Kentuckah and tell all his cousin-brothers how zany and spontaneous New York is, thus bringing more people to witness this “street art.”
Respectfully, I disagree. Nobdody watches this dick except tourists. Let him take his tired act to Times Square so the folks from Jokelahoma can marvel at the gritty New York experience they can share with their loser Big-12 brethren.
It’s Oklahoma. And what’s with the Big-12 hate? You’re isolating yourself from people who don’t like hipster, regardless if they’re from NY or the Midwest.
I like that idea. He’ll be forced to see himself as he actually is.
My brother, thassa great idea! We kidnap him, take him for a friendly joy ride straight to the Kentucky coal mines and leave him there, but before giving word to the foreman,”Hey boss, he really wants to do this but he’s just a tad shy. I know you can help him out. Get him fittted in some
coveralls and a hard hat and drop him down a well, and leave him there, if he causes you trouble. Otherwise, get him follow in line with the other miners. The upside is he may turn out to be a very good worker and the other upside is your tired and stressed out men will have a new game,”Teach the Hipster How To Be A Real Man.” Seriously man, just toss him in the dorms with the rest of the guys. They’ll help him work his issues out.
Where big cheif basically states,:Yep, they will.But now listen, you tell your lot on that board of yours that if gives me any beef, I’m going old school on his ace. I’ll lock him up in a tunnel he won’t ever find his way out of and by the next morning, I assure you, he’ll be a good boy ready to learn again. Sound like a deal?”
“Sounds like a damn fine deal, Boss. Let’s shake on it. OH, and you know where to find us and relay little Matty’s progress,won’tcha?”
“You got it. Now beat it, I got double the work load tomorrow, a fresher, and I hear a bottle of
yik-yak calling my name. See ya FUWI.
Hopefully not cheif, hopefully not
I concur with dropping him into a salt mine. That’s as as far as I’ll agree with you. I’m sorry; but, your suggestion reeks of this compassion stuff and an attempt to rehabilitate this morbidly annoying example of defective chromosomes. What you suggests amounts to nothing more than a “time out” for this cat whisker-armed stick puppet. The entrance should be dynamited after Matt Silverfishlegs is deposited. Just to show you I, too. can be a humane individual, I’ll even let him have a case of handcrafted antelope earwax candles and a large box of matches. He’ll be able to illuminate the salt mine cavity while at the same time asphyxiating himself by burning up the oxygen supply. I know, I know, you’re thinking “what a magnanimous son of a bitch this guy is.” Well, that’s just the kind of guy I am.
There’s gotta be a way to donate him to China. They could turn him into a new “art” piece for the “Bodies” exhibit at the Seaport.
I’m partial to interactive exhibits. He could be suspended from the ceiling by his beard and used as a sparring bag at Gold’s Gym .
This didn’t make me smile. Not even once.
Same here. I harbored an impulse to go there at kick him in the balls–if he has any.
right by my favorite dive bar THE CONTINENTAL! makes me wanna go have a few drinks then walk over and kick him in the nuts
I didn’t watch the video earlier I just assumed he was in Union Square where I usually see him. Once you said the Continental I begrudgingly watched it and see he’s at Astor. One more place to avoid.
It’s full of hipsters and yupsters all around, and on weekends it’s a never ending sea of Pilates equipment or Yoga mats.
I went to St Marks a few weeks ago. Glad to see the $1 pizza spot is still there. It was also nice to find refuge with Brendan the bartender in the Irish Pub across the street. Not cool enough for the hiptards to stay for any length of time.
Watching Matt’s “performance” raises a few issues. Many of them are addressed in the commentary. The first is that as pathetic as this video is, he obviously rehearsed it with his drummer. What we are seeing is his “refined” performance. He actually PRACTICED it! He actually rehearsed it many times to work out the kinks. Matt Silver, a walking, breathing tumor actually rehearsed what we can see on that video. Somewhere out there are his outtakes.
How fucked up is that?
What’s really fucked up is that he seems to think he has some type of talent or that he’s funny, and he’s hoping that NYU students will tolerate him more than people in Union Square did. I’d love to get Simon Cowell to come to New York just to bring this annoying kidult back down to Earth with some snarky remark and a concise but detailed explanation of how untalented he is.
I’d love to get Leon Spinks in his prime to come to New York and punch that fuck right in the throat!
If we all flag this video for nudity because of the topless grandma (wth is up with her?) at 3:45 we can get it removed and hidden from the sight of normal human beings. Who’s with me?
A topless grandmother? I couldn’t get past 15 seconds on it.
DESTROY THIS NO-JOB-HAVING PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
As long as ihis destruction is slow and painful, I’m with you.
It will only end badly for Matthew. Alone and broke, having burned through his inheritance on his $2000/month studio and drug habit. Whatever “novelty” value he has now, will have long since evaporated in 15 years. He’ll be woefully unsuited for any job, and he’ll most likely turn to heroin and/or selling his body while living under an overpass.
The only way he’s selling his body is for scientific experimentation. “People complained when we sprayed bleach into the eyes of rabbits and made monkeys smoke cartons of cigarettes every hour to test for toxicity. Now we just ask for hipster volunteers, and promise to pay them in videos of their testing. Not only are we up to our armpits in attention-seekers who figure that acid burns and rectal prolapses are so much more 2012 than sleeve tattoos, but if we get a particularly bad reaction to a new rat poison, nothing of value is lost.”
Naw, I can totally see ol’ Matty boy sitting sad and forlon mumbling to men entering a park restroom
“Busness mister?”. Just to collect the money to pay for a decent doctor who will ge him on the meds
he so clearly needs. Bipolars are just like Hipsters…when they’re in a manic state they are in total denial. They feel so good they don’t wan to take the drugs that will calm tem
Remember when that cube used to spin? My friends and I used to push it around, just to bust balls. This is back before everything was so safe.. I bought a used “The Song Remains the Same” record by Zeppelin in front of that cube using the $3 I was going to use to see Blade Runner at the St. Marks cinema. Never saw Blade Runner.
Oh what a beating this guy would have caught back in those days…
Yes my friends and I would spin that cube…whenever I walked by it I would spin it. I miss that. I remember when skaters used to hang out there all the time. Silver never would have stood a chance with them.
Astor Place, right?
Yeah they don’t wanna hear “back in the days” – they are ‘progressive’. They make things (lol) better for us. Yeah I get it: things change. But they never changed into such pussified states as we have today.
Or as fucking BORING.
hipsters are a bi-product of feminism in america. they are heterophobics! and the things you quoted in this article are all shaming tactics.
continue on dh, continue on..
Sorry man, but there’s nothing weaker from a guy in my book than him blaming women with differing politics than himself for the downfall of everything. They ruined Rome too, right?
What they’re a by-product of is parental enabling and snobbery. The formula was probably decided on before they were ten years old: Caleb goes to $$$$$ NY school, we support Caleb till he finds work in some form, Caleb becomes famous [whatever], we all live happily ever after. Hell, they may be using their own kids to grab up land in NY. ‘Anchor Spawn’, as it were. Those Boomers are just the narcissists to plan so consciously. ( how’s that for generalisation? lol )
Booboo, you are so so right. I remember ’86 and ’87. Late nights. Nothing but drunks out having fun with that cube. We’d go to Kenny Castaways (RIP) and enjoy the downtown nightlife. Matt would have been our pinata back then.
Yeah can’t believe they closed Kennys. I went there one night and as I was coming out of the bathroom there used to be a folding screen. Some drunk girl bumped into me and I knock down the screen right into the band. Good Times! Haha
Man, the ravers at Konkrete Jungle woulda served this idiot, Ah, memories…
He takes up all the room on the sidewalk, so the pedestrians have to walk in the street, but he doesn’t care. Let them walk in the street. This is ART ART ART ART ART ART don’t you understand??
Then he sees the granny with her naked boobs but doesn’t acknowledge her, or incorporate her into his act, like he did with the guy. Because God forbid, granny’s boobs steal attention from LOOK AT MEEE Little Matty in his gross speedo. Naked granny boobs>Matty Silver’s speedo IMO. How much longer are we going to have to put up with him? When is he going home?
You are going to end up on Tosh.O with one of these videos!!! keep up the good work..
http://thecaptainpower.blogspot.com/2012/10/whiter-teeth-adds-2-inches-to-your-penis.html
I ABSOLUTELY HATE THESE MOTHERFUCKERS KNOWN AS HIPSTERS. HOW CAN MEN JUSTIFY WEARING SKINNY WOMEN JEANS? DISGUSTING.
SERIOUSLY, IF I FOUND OUT MY SON DECIDED TO BECOME A HIPSTER, I WOULD DISOWN THE BASTARD.
Sock puppet alert!
DID THE ALL CAPS GIVE IT AWAY?!!!!
lol
Yep, and a shitty sockpuppet at that . You’d think they’d actually be somewhat good at it by now. Can you imagine an undercover cop being as transparent as these hipster socks?
My first thought- this guy is off his meds. My 2nd thought- if I saw him in the alley behind my house I would be scared. Also couldn’t even watch whole thing because he’s a fucktard/ ass clown.
Is it me or if you time it right with the cowbell the video syncs perfectly with Mississippi Queen?
I think he is trying to act like a homeless crazy guy. He’s a Jewish kid from Bergen County.
“Doris – my son is a heart surgeon. What’s Matthew doing?”
“Ohh Matthew…uhh…he’s a famous performance artist in New York. He had 13 youtube hits last week.”
“Ohh OK…nice seeing you, Doris”
Bergen County? More like some inbred mutoid from the Pine Barrens. Every once in a while, a few manage to escape into civilization.
The Jersey Devil?
LOL! So true.
“Bushwick artist” Hah, hah, hah.
http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/brooklyn/brooklyn-bicyclist-fined-1-555-single-ride-article-1.1182364
Smug indignant bastard who can afford an apartment along with other expensive shit when $1555 is a tenth of his annual income. Those fuckers defending him need in person and in the comments section need a serious beating.
I hope he will still be found guilty. If I ran 3 red lights in a row while distracted I can kiss my license goodbye along with double that over summons amount.
Asshole should get a job
Will someone please call NYPD on that crak head and knock some sense to him. I mean comeon that is pure shit.
*crack
Its funny to imagine this guy winning one of the games at the feast of St. Gennaro to get that stupid Rastafarian banana. If feel like he didn’t even win – the carnies were just like “Please, just take the rasta banana and leave. You smell.”
In an effort to pull my own weight a little…here you go ( though I somehow feel as if it’s more infliction of banality on you )…
old school style for new school learnin’ ya
http://qph.cf.quoracdn.net/main-qimg-af7029b0198b0b54331c2aef533b804a
the skinny guy/fat chick mystery answered
http://www.villagevoice.com/2011-05-04/news/guys-who-like-fat-chicks/
finally, for hipsterimanator….your new pin up girl for 2013…
http://www.bangbangberlin.com/en/index/Fashion/Berlin-Faces-Posh-The-Prince/
Oh, thanks SO much for that. Hopefully “SHE” won’t take the s-bahn in the wrong direction.
BTW…BOOM! Justice served, Bitch lol
The ‘free speech’ argument is a fail when it comes to <18 yr old kids. End of story.
https://gawker.com/5950981/unmasking-reddits-violentacrez-the-biggest-troll-on-the-web
Fat dude? check
White dude? check
Middle-aged dude? check
Married dude? check
No Life dude? check
Pervy dude? check
Troll dude going bye-bye? Check, and check again LOL
Fucking Reddit moderators – people like this on the web, they’re like 7th Graders with a vocabulary. Smart as fuck in some regards, but too stupid to understand that if they continue to stretch the boundaries of free speech, Helter Skelter’s gonna come down hard and free speech as they understand it is going to cease to exist. They’ll have no one but themselves to blame … but rest assured, they’ll try to hang it on somebody else anyway.
Nasty factoid from that article. He claimed to have gotten a BJ from his 19 yr old step-daughter about 10 years ago. Said his wife was mad at first but got over it.
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Just saw the topless granny. I suppose if one is used to Mattie in full retard prancing around in his speedo, granny flashing her senior tits would just barely raise a yawn.
Holy shit, this thread really generated some sweet, much-needed, anti-Hipster vitriol. I couldn’t get through all 173 responses, so I may be repeating something already said above, but I’ll add this just in case: what really worries me about a lot of this BS is how many of these douchebags are going to cycle right back into the system that educated them–grade-less, pampering private schools that fed them into equally pampering, standard-less private colleges–as educators.
I’ve met idiots who haven’t accomplished a damn thing in life, yet have “creative” degrees, and who see as they’re only path forward returning to school for MFAs as worthless as their BAs so they can then teach the next generation of fucking idiots how to do what they did: nothing. And the idiots who don’t have their parents’ money to pay for the $200K+ total in worthless “education” that they take loans out to pay for will, undoubtedly, be defaulting on those loans.
We have a very expensive, self-perpetuating idiot-creating system here in the US. I actually met a girl who, straddled with debt, is ready to take on a ridiculous new mountain of debt for her MFA for a shot at later teaching, even though she readily admits that the entire system is just a big ponzi scheme. She has a film degree but has never worked on a film but, of course, she’s spent a fortune covering herself head to toe in shitty tattoos. And she’s ready to start training the next generation of “artists”. I’m sure she’ll get some low-paid teaching gig in a some hipster factory where she’ll just give everyone As, if there are even grades, and then default on her massive student debt because Whole Foods gets her entire paycheck every week.
And on and on it goes…
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