Meet Arty the Seal. Also, pardon my poor graphics skills; I admit I am not an artist – which puts me in the same fucking category as 95 fucking percent of the tidal wave of fucking phonies that has crashed upon Brooklyn from Flyoverlandia – I just have no problem admitting it. Anyway, I think this really needs to be done: dress up a barking seal with a fake beard, fedora or ski hat, and some thick-frames so he looks, you know: UNIQUE. Then we put him in the back of a pick-up truck and slowly drive up and down all the streets of the once normal Brooklyn neighborhoods and have him bark ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART all fucking day to show these transient, rent-raising pussies how played out their bullshit “art-scene” really is. We can also toss out free Coney Island whitefish at the hipsters to feed the seal. Like yah! YAH! YAH!
First DH, love the seal. I peed a little. Second, update from the street: Id like to take this opportunity to thank the Empire State shooter. The east villiage and les were DESERTED by comparision. I heard native new york accents and normal transplants from everywhere(states and countries) not ashamed of themselves and being normal people. The dispatch radio was quiet. Barely a like yah in sight. He scared em inside for the night!
When you typed the words “I’d like to take this opportunity to thank the Empire State Shooter” was the time to listen to that little voice in your head that was telling you “this is over the line considering one victim is lying lifeless in a morgue and a number of others are in the ER with gunshot wounds and this senseless incident has no humor to mine that is relevant to this website.” That would have been a good time to stop at “I peed a little.”
Valad point. No disrespect meant. My apologies for any offence.
No problem. I’m glad we could be civil about it and appreciate your understanding.
I understand what you meant, Ally. I don’t think anyone really believes that you were celebrating the actual shootings, just the fact that these phony bearded zeros are such pussies that any major incident like that will keep them inside for a while. I was at a pool hall / club downtown last night, and I gotta say, I did not see a single Buddy Holly glasses wearing twizzler or hear that kazoo whine all night; honestly can’t remember too many nights the last few years where I can say that.
You people have nothing better to do but hate.Im sure when you were young you wore clothes that your parents thought strange,carried Walkmans and listened to shitty 80s music. Every generation has its moments of wanting to belong. So why don’t you go get some geritol and get over it ? You spend plenty of time collecting hipster pics and bitching on here so you are a loser yourself. I’d rather be a Megan or Matt than a mouth breathing Bruno or Vinnie.
LOL! You think we are talking about teens and people barely out of college? You must not even be anywhere near Brooklyn to not know what I’m talking about; probably packing the U-Haul soon to come here though. We are talking about 25 – 40 year olds that ACT like perpetual children. Walking around in ‘look at me” outfits every single day – every where they go, pretending to be creative types. Forget it, why even bother explaining this for the millionth time. Read the FAQ’s – fucking hosebag.
Catherine breathes through her mouth because her finger is constantly up her nose. That’s why she types with one hand. Her mom and the rest of the folks in the trailer park don’t see that as unusual.
Bruno or Vinny ?? My My Catherine the Hipster Hypocrite, how hypocritical. A derogatory comment about Italians? A bit racist I may add as well. So lets see if I have this correct? You posted about “young, different clothing, a bit strange shitty 80s music”? We should get over it correct catherine? You want people on DH to be more accepting of Hipsters yet you make a racist comment about Italians? Are you fucking kidding me? Typical closet racism from a Hipster. You want to know why Hipsters are the biggest racist yet they are to stupid to know they are? Because they will say stuff like ” Well what this area before Hipsters moved in”? Hmmm I dont know, Black, Latino, Blue collar white, real Brooklyn Flavor. if its better now that Hipsters are here than one can only assume it was worse before you got here, so what do you mean by worse? Black, Latino, Italian inferes worse? Good job catherine you proved my point. Maybe you should “GET OVER IT”
All hipster apologists come around to the Young vs. Old argument eventually, which completely misses the point. It’s Shitty vs. Not Shitty. It’s LOOK AT MEEE attention whoring over nothing worth any of the attention whoring. All the rest of us just want is for the talentless hipster tryhards to SHUT THE FUCK UP.
Also, 25-40 year old hipsters are obsessed with the 80s. They wear 80′s “vintage” clothes that they spent $300 on at the rilly kewel overpriced vintage stores. They wouldn’t think they were cool or buy them otherwise. They listen to 80s music. Hipsters act as if they INVENTED the 80s. Their shitty 80s clothes and “80s-inspired” music sure sucks ass and just goes to show how clueless they are.
FYI Looking like an 80s mall rat was never cool in the 80s.
“You people”, “mouth breathing Bruno or Vinnie”…I see right through you, but thanks for playing.
Go back to Evanston. Pendeja!
Sorry, Toots. You can’t portray as a guidos. We are more diverse. You, of course, can’t see that because you can’t understand what it is about hipsters that we all hate, so you try to apply a stereotype to us. Ain’t working, chica!
Cathy, Cathy, Cathy, Italian culture gave the world DaVinci, Garibaldi, Fermi, Marconi, Michaelangelo, Verdi, DiMaggio, DeNiro; shall I go on?
Hipster culture gave us Silver, Lam and DeChannel.
Also, Italians gave us Osso bucco, mostacelli, gnocchi, veal piccata; shall I go on?
Hipsters gave us Rice Crispy Treats and 20$ mayonnaise.
We understand hipsters, you do not understand Italians! READ A BOOK! ( it’s a kind of papery blog)
BRAVO!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hey Mr. Silver Speedo, thank you for your “Bravo” re my comment on Catherine Trumel’s diatribe against Italians. Typical hipster non sequitur, attack instead of defending your position. She and her tribe could teach Mussolini a thing or two about facism!
You’re no slouch yourself when it comes to presenting a well formed argument.
I salute you, sir.
LET THE HATE FLOW THROUGH YOU, YOUNG HIPSTER BEATER!
First off, eat a bag of dicks. Herpes dicks. Syphilis dicks. AIDS dicks. Eat ‘em.
Second, yes I wore clothes my parents and peers didn’t like, and bumped music many considered shitty. Unlike a piece of shit hipster, I was actually real about my shit AND down for my shit. I wasn’t some fake ass poser and a pussy. Unlike you fuckers, I faced physical violence in addition to verbal abuse for my clothes and music, and unlike you fuckers, I fought back. I wore the “haterism” from my enemies like a badges and combat medals. Shit, a lot of us bonded by fighting our enemies. We didn’t cry about our enemies the way you fucks do. I belonged to real subcultures growing up — not a bastardized pastiche of the most superficial elements of preexisting subcultures. You fucks are swaggerjacking fakes of the worst kind. Fraudulent. There’s a reason you’re called “Fauxhemians”. You only do shit to look “cool”. Fake as can be.
I laugh when you hipturds take jabs at our ages — especially when I can’t throw a rock without hitting a hiptard over 30 (some even in their early 40s), and the fact I look younger and better than 99.9% of you — male and female included. Some of you look so damn busted. Shut your sexually frustrated ass up. I’ve seen the dudes you Meghans date. Shit, I’ve see you Meghans (cankles and no ass whatsoever. Do some damn squats and lunges you lazy hoes). I bet the strapon plays a major role in your relationships, and you’ve spent a small fortune on batteries.
You so fucking want this to be true. I have 2 masters degrees (one in engineering) and I work for City government. I make decision that effect the people of NYC every day. six figure salary, wife of 24 years, 3 kids, one finishing graduate school, single family home (paid for you, renting piece of shit), born in Brooklyn, just like my father, grandfather and great grandfather. I attend baseball games, the symphony, the ballet , opera when my wife will go and frequent the museums and exhibits. Sorry I refuse to fit into you vison of every one that doesn’t where Buddy Holly glasses and a lumberjack shirt. BTW, thaks for you tax dollars. You are paying my pension and my medical. Get a real fucking job, barista isn’t working for me.
I grew up on Graham ave in Brooklyn….so I know the area. No I get it,but maybe we should stop giving them the attention they crave? Also the fact that rents are so high isn’t their fault. Look at this world ,it’s all about profit they just live in it. Do you think if I’m a landlord and I can get some idiot to pay 1500 for a shitty place I won’t ?
Thats the point Catherine, only idiots would pay those rents – and idiots did just that; they’re called hipster transplants. They began the rent hikes in Brooklyn which trickled down eveywhere in the borough. No native or recently arrived immigrant would ever be duped into paying more than $700 a month for a one bedroom – but standard Josh and Megan from the liberal arts world and cornfields did. Thus leading to the creation of this site. Can’t we vent? You can go start http://www.AwwDontBeSoHardOnHipsters.comif you’d like.
$700 for a 1br?? What kind of asscrack of a neighberhood do you live in?
Pre-Hipster Brooklyn
Which is to say Brooklyn with three-dimensional people living in it.
WE don’t give them the attention they crave, outlets like the NYT and NY mag do. We’re just here to bitch about the pointlessness of it all in relation to the bigger picture. A respected international media outlet focusing on rooftop tiny-scale urban farming created to provide a sustainable (not to say artisinal) local food source for ONE fucking restaurant? Honestly, you can’t get much more pointless than that.
And yes, it IS their fault that rents are so high. I can’t really fault a landlord for jacking up rents to what the market will bear, but when the market is populated by trustfund fuckpigs like our own beloved Matthew Silver who have no concept of an apartment’s real world value other than “like, yah; living in the city is expensive,” that market will pay entirely too much for rent. There’s no other way to explain why the last apartment we rented in Chicago, a three-bedroom in a beautiful brick turn-of-the-20th-Century three-flat walkup, went form $565 to $1,595 … in 4 years. Landlords weren’t even publishing rent prices for their apartments – “call for lease terms,” the ads would say – and once they realized they had the kid of a bank president from Tiffin, Ohio on the hook they’d throw out a ridiculous number, the kid’s daddy would shell out first, last, and a wacky security deposit and sign a lease, and the landlord would laugh all the way to the bank. I would imagine this scenario’s repeating itself in hipsterizing neighborhoods in many of the nation’s big cities. You try that shit in a non-gentrifying neighborhood and you’re going to be sitting on an empty apartment for months on end.
Kudos to DH for starting a site where we can vent as vehemently as we fell we need to without going out on the street to act out on these motherfuckers, like they insist on acting out their naive artistic fantasies on us at the park, on the subway, on the street, and practically everywhere else. I’ve experienced their adult versions of Show And Tell, and there’s nothing for me in what they advocate – I grew up in the 60s and 70s; I’ve been there and done that, and they’re only fooling themselves if they actually believe that it’s going to be different this time and their vision is going to be accepted by the mainstream.
Finally, I agree with DH wholeheartedly; if you want to cultivate a warmer and fuzzier discourse on the role of hipsters in the lives of normal urban folks, this is probably not the place to do it – the site’s not called Die Hipster for nothing.
Farming some edible plants on roof tops is a good idea. Even in the city of New York, if you have a green thumb and actual space then i am envious. Growing a plant or some bamboo is a smart idea. City gardening has been done forever. Its nothing necessarily new, and growing food is of rising importance in concrete jungles everywhere around the world. What sucks is that the hipsters have twisted city gardening into some ill “discovery”, it is truly pathetic :shrugs:
Another comment i have about rent in NYC, specifically in Brooklyn. A lot of those areas are probably owned and controlled by real estate investor types. Some tycoons with plentiful city knowledge and leverage to boot. Some operate under phantom limited liability companies. The landlords come to collect hupster’s rent checks each month, but the owners are the only ones who call the shots about raising that cost. To fucking astronomical prices! Those owners are savy and calculating business people cashing in.
I grew up swimming at Manhattan beach, Brighton and Coney Island and if there is any group that deserves to choke to death on coney island whitefish, it’s fucking Hipsters!!!
http://www.maninwhitedress.com/?p=2537 now all of a sudden “anonymous” comments about Silver’s “art” are acceptable – as long as they are anonymous comments he likes. Speaking of.. that “anonymous” letter is so close to Silver’s own writing style one has to wonder if he’s started writing to himself LOL!!!
I believe the operative term, is mental masturbation. Something Hiptards excel at considering that they would even fuck up the act of physical masturbation.
Silver is obsessed with our art critiques here. Instead of manning up and using this information to shape his act up he attacks us and talks to himself. Silver sees no room for improvement in his “art” which is the polar opposite of how most artists actually work.
His shitty cardboard sign, dirty basket of props (trash), ugly and slovenly presentation may not earn him criticism in brooklyn galleries but it sure as fuck earns him criticism here.
You just don’t get his art. He is so anti-art with his bag of junk and talentless retarded antics that it makes him a REAL ARTIST. You Working Class, uncultured haters just don’t get the artistic genius of his irony.
Oh, so Silver is intellectually superior to us. We get his “art.” It sucks and has no value; it is cancer.
Irony. Wow. Nobody ever thought of that. Silver should be folding T-shirts at Old Navy, but he can’t hold down a job.
Brad, me lad, you’re right. We’re all working class, we’re all uncultured, and we’re all haters. Consider us suitably chastised, and YOU as the WINNER of this “discussion.” Congratulations, you of superior intellect. Now, go pick up your participation trophy from DH and get the fuck off of the site.
Hey Mr. Speedo,(can I call you Silver?) we had a “performer” here in Cincnnati equal in inanity to Matthew Silver. His name is Bevo Ruzsa and he used to do vocals for local punk bands in the 80s. Actually he threw vocal seizures into a mike while gyrating and throwing his 3foot hair around, at least he did it on stage in scummy clubs no one with any sense would enter instead of on the street alarming the populace and scaring the children.
I went to school with this schmuck from 8th grade on, he was in and out of mental health facilities well into adulthood. Google him and you’ll get a raft of idiotic, early hipster poses and pretentious art photos of the bands on rooftops, so predictable!
There was a really funny judge judy show with a guy like what you are describing.. u got to see this, lol :
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YthaQ_zP1Ak&w=420&h=315%5D
i’m not sure these types are “hipsters” , the $20 mayonnaise, beards, parental support that we troll here, but it’s still gross nonetheless! lol
The band (Skitzo) are definitely not hipsters.
http://magnatune.com/artists/skitzo
Still, I’d never be front row at any of their gigs.
yah, it’s a little nauseating but it’s not worthy of the scorn we heap on hipsters here on a daily basis.
True. If they vomited on hipsters, I’d by each band member several rounds — I’d just make sure I’m not drinking at the same table as them
.
DOH! “buy each band”.
I remember that show! Vomiting on people as performance art. They may not be hipsters but you can bet dollars to cupcakes older hipsters are bragging “I got vomited on before it was cool!”
Remember that group of “artists” that swallowed liquid gelatin and barfed on representational art in serious art museums?
Or the two guys who pissed in Marcel Du Champ’s early non-art exhibit ? It was a urinal signed with an enigmatic signature sitting on a waist high pedastel. I am against defacing artwork but that one was appropriate, I mean it was a URINAL posing as art!
If ya can’t eat it, drink it, smoke it or fuck it; PISS ON IT!
.
Lmao sadly I have met this bevo would like to know more info on him as he is around someone very dear to me
He is, if nothing else, predictable. I wonder if he’s been re-reading my post where I mentioned the lack of fans defending him on DH. Keep in mind, this guy had to create two sockpuppet accounts to defend him on DH. He had a total of 3 actual people ride for him. He had plenty on facebook give him moral support, but they didn’t come anywhere near DH. I also can’t help but notice the dearth of reader comments on his site. Is he so thin-skinned that he can’t even risk the possibility of negative comments?
I did some reading between Matti Silver’s lines in his reply to the email he probably wrote to himself(I noticed that, too):
“I know I’m doing my job well in this universe. I’ve chosen to be an idiot clown for this reason. -Because I have the luxury of living off my parents indefinately. This is a JOB?? He considers this his employment???
“I’ve been doing it on and off 7 years.” -Because I don’t need a REAL job to go to every day since my parents still pay for me.
“I’ve gone through many mental breakdowns in my life to finally come to this conclusion” -Something tells me he’ll be going through a few more breakdowns, wind up a full-time resident of Creedmore and collect disability for the remainder of his useless life.
But wait; there’s more…
“More about myself is being revealed to me in light of these changes. I’m feeling insecure, unimportant, unsure. I’m changing faster than my mind can adjust to.”
Smells like he’s getting closer to the edge. Or maybe he’s finally in therapy (please, Matthew’s dad). We may see him quickly move to the soft-wall suite in Happydale sooner than anyone thinks.
Like I said before, we should pity him, not hate him. This guy is mentally ill, and needs help – and leaving him out on the street to act out like that isn’t helping him. He’s literally dancing for quarters from the crowd laughing *at* (not with) him.
Fuck your trash art! Most of the so called art you try hard hipsters ruin the city with is insulting to the hard working class who are working to support family’s as you artsy fartsy trustfunded interlopers play with clay and paint wierd shit that nobody in there right mind would pay for. Most likely mommy and daddy coddled them by telling them their refrigerator art was “special ” into 12 th grade and then on to liberal arts college with a degree in fecal sculpting.
You know who’s really insulted by hipster trash art? Artists!
In 1971 I worked for prominent Cincinnati sculptor Robert McNesky, sanding and polishing statues. He’d lost a leg in Korea and was awarded the Silver Star. His art was commissioned by the Cincinnati Zoo twice. He and his wife, another respected artist raised three kids with money they earned through their art. This man hated pretentious hipster art and was really pissed at the city for falling for it time and time again. Example: Instead of using one of many professional Cincinnati artists for a sculpture on Fountain Square they opted for a kiki European art hack who charged them 100K for an untouched block of granite straight from the quarry set on a stainless steel arch. While observing this masterpiece I overheard two UC art students discussing it’s significance, particularly the uniform row of grooves down the side of the stone. When I politely informed them that the grooves were the fracturing channels drilled into the stone to separate the block from the quarry and the “artist” never even touched a chisel to it they mumbled something about the artist recognizing the perfect form that needed nothing more. Even they realized how lame that sounded and suddenly remembered an appointment.
Cincinnati produced McNesky, Duveneck, Chuck Cutler, Longworth and many other great artists but consistently hired out of towners for community projects so we wouldn’t look like rubes.When ever I see schlock art foisted on the public I think of McNesky and what he would say.
ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART
http://blogs.sfweekly.com/thesnitch/2012/08/obama_romney_beef_jerky.php
S.F. Meat Lover Makes Obama, Romney Portraits Entirely Out of Beef Jerky
Instead of Arty the Seal, how about taking a hipster that resmbles Arty in costume and throw his scrawny, transluscent-white hairy ass in with the seals at the Brooklyn Aquarium!
Or dip him in a barrel of chum then throw him the shark tank at the aquarium.
I’ve done that type of hipster beating before.
Isn’t “Romney” and “jerky” redundant?
ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART
ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART
ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART ART
Woah, Dewd, is this like one of those graphics that when you blur your vision while looking straight at it, you can see, like, the hidden image? I think I see the word “ART” in it! Like, Yah!
Ian looked toward Staten Island from a Brooklyn rooftop and claimed he saw Queens. This has the same effect!
What’s up everybody? I have been refraining from posting on this blog because of special edd and his posse of obsessed male groupies that look for any reason to derive content for their stupid blog. I ended up getting “exposed” yet again…but this time he felt the need to include a video of me that I posted on youtube 2 years ago and a picture of me from 4 years ago from my (now inactive) myspace account.
Rather than give him the internet back and forth argument he so desperately wanted, I just blew up his spot and posted links to all of my music and sites to promote myself and steal his thunder. I really don’t know why he (or they) spend so much time to a site they hate…why not avoid it and carry on?
I just moved to New York and I don’t need weirdos on my jock…I just posted on here to express my disdain towards my generation (the hipster generation) and vent about how some of my favorite avenues of culture (art, music, etc…) were being polluted with BS because of hipsters. What is up with these guys? I know their blog sucks and is devoid of any real substance, but it seems like they wanted to pick on me out of the many people that post on here. I don’t know.
With that said, I’m going to retire this handle and come back under another handle. I don’t want these people trying to pry my personal info when all I’m trying to do is talk about things without the intent of harm.
He’s a gentrifying mutant who only survives on parental support. He’s not successful like he desperately wishes to be and is obsessed with this blog because he does not know how to deal with any criticism. He should worry more about improving his craft, living free from parental support and landing more jobs than stalking people who write comments on this blog.
I thought I gave that dude some sound advice. He’s angry at DH, but he needs to verbally lay into his father for being either spineless or absent and his mother for being such a ball-busting termagant. I can only think he’s someone who as never rebelled against his parents in an effort to establish his own identity.
I also explained to him in excruciating detail (he hates when I do that. Hell, even I hate when I do that at times), why you aren’t a hipster. I even tried to explain to him what “mix set” is. He actually thinks you wrote “Peanut Butter Jelly Time” (one of the songs in your set). He also probably learned about 4-chan last month. I guess he only hears what he wants to hear.
Hey, any publicity is good publicity.
It’s because, and I’ve said it before, you can’t say “Look at Meeeee ….. .I’m a Fucking Jackass” without saying “Look at Meeee”. Hipsters want attention. They don’t care how they get it.
BTW, DH…keep on doing what you’re doing. There are many people like myself who fucking dig this site as a guilty pleasure or a not so guilty pleasure. You’re inspiring future generations of young people to avoid the BS and work hard to get to where they want to be…including myself. PEACE.
Yes thanks DH for giving us a place to clown on these fools
I bid $1,000,000.
IMO the shitty art created by that ESB complete psychopath murderer is still better than most art created by PBR guzzling, $20 artisinal mayonnaise eating, rooftop blogging thick eyeglass, ski hat in summer, daddy’s little princess jeans wearing, quirky unicycle riding, 6-to-a-loft $4000/month parentally funded transplant Nieuw Breukelen funemployed playcationers with Daddy’s NYT/NY Mag connections. As schlocky as it is, there is still more imagery there than in a blob of paint on a canvas that passes for art in parentally funded NorthEastWestBushBurgSlope galleries.
http://newyork.cbslocal.com/2012/08/24/a-look-at-the-bizarre-artwork-of-empire-state-gunman-jeffrey-johnson/
I agree = it looks like he actually had some talent. I suspect his demise after he snapped was “suicide by cop”. I feel very, very bad for the bystanders.
Now if we can set Matthew up…
Arty The Seal is cracking me up!! – I think we need to get him an Ohio State University t-shirt and have him splash around in a pool of PBR
Art art art Art art Art art art art. Lol. Yeah, Ohio state shirt, but something quirky and odd like badminton team 1962.
Quirky, odd Tshirts? Got them all beat, I have a 50 year old purple T with crossed lacrosse sticks under a white rocker reading “EPISCOPAL LACROSSE”
Wore it for years as a work shirt and it just won’t die (they made them better then).
I wonder how much I could get on EBay for it from some fashion conscious hiptard to pair with a contrasting scarf and his sister’s jeans. It just drips with irony so I’m thinking 200 +
I’ve got a faded blue “Fridley Girls Softball” t-shirt circa ’72 that every skinny little hipster boy would lust after if they knew such a marvelous thing exists. “Oh, such delicious IRONY,” they would drool as I play “You Make Me Cream In My Jeans” by Wayne County and the Electric Chairs in its original 7″ vinyl release. All the better to feed their obsessive quirky t-shirt fantasies.
I also have one from a high school in my county “BRADFORD WRESTLING BEAVERS” with a cute little retro cartoon beaver to deflect the obvious joke.
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