Today's hipster beating.

Today’s hipster beating.

Posted on July 5, 2012 by diehipster

Today, I heard a Q-tip limbed, summer scarf wearing, bearded soy boy say “like yah” into his phone which was the answer to his Mommy’s question – “Do you need me to send you some more money Josh?” on the other end back in Osh Kosh. So I secured him to a wall with a piece of chewing gum and threw 200 empty Old English 40′s at his vapid, emaciated face. End of story.

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143 Responses to Today’s hipster beating.

Pat I says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:18 am

Went to Phily last night to check out the fireworks show. It was hotter than balls.
But there he was – temps pushing toward the triple digits and – Joshie is wearing a scarf and a ski cap. Riding a f**king line green bike with a banana seat,

Even my mother in law – who’s only has two braincells (I named them “inhale” and “exhale”) said, “why is that boy wearing a scarf and a ski cap).

Honestly – he looked like a mental patient. No doubt he was out to drain the city of more money
when the EMTs treated him for heat exhaustion.

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- Awesome Dude Hipster says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 8:44 pm
  
  What is line green?
  
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  - Jack says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 9:26 pm
    
    The colour of the liquid that fills your underwear when you have to go to a bar containing real men/women?
    
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    - Cowboy Bob says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 9:28 pm
      
      Haha, there are no “real bars” in New York, you city slicker.
      
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    - Bill DDoltree says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 10:31 pm
      
      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  - Bill Doltree says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 9:38 pm
    
    ch hath so bound and firmly knit the hearts of all Your Majesty’s loyal and religious people unto You, that Your very name is precious among them: their eye doth behold You with comfort, and they bless You in their hearts, as that sanctified Person, who, under God, is the immediate Author of their true happiness. And this their contentment doth not diminish or decay, but every day increaseth and taketh strength, when they observe, that the zeal of Your Majesty toward the house of God doth not slack or go backward, but is more and more kindled, manifesting itself abroad in the farthest parts of [Christendom], by writing in defence of the Truth, (which hath given such a blow unto that man of Sin, as will not be healed,) and every day at home, by religious and learned discourse, by frequenting the house of God, by hearing the Word preached, by cherishing the Teachers thereof, by caring for the Church, as a most tender and loving nursing Father.
    
    There are infinite arguments of this right Christian and religious affection in Your Majesty; but none is more forcible to declare it to others than the vehement and perpetuated desire of accomplishing and publishing of this work, which now with all humility we present unto Your Majesty. For when Your Highness had once out of deep judgment apprehended how convenient it was, that out of the Original Sacred Tongues, together with comparing of the labours, both in our own, and other foreign Languages, of many worthy men who went before us, there should be one more exact Translation of the holy Scriptures into the [English Tongue]; Your Majesty did never desist to urge and to excite those to whom it was commended, that the work might be hastened, and that the business might be expedited in so decent a manner, as a matter of such importance might justly require.
    
    And now at last, by the mercy of God, and the continuance of our labours, it being brought unto such a conclusion, as that we have great hopes that the Church of [England] shall reap good fruit thereby; we hold it our duty to offer it to Your Majesty, not only as to our King and Sovereign, but as to the principal Mover and Author of the work: humbly craving of Your most Sacred Majesty, that since things of this quality have ever been subject to the censures of illmeaning and discontented persons, it may receive approbation and patronage from so learned and judicious a Prince as Your Highness is, whose allowance and acceptance of our labours shall more honour and encourage us, than all the calumniations and hard interpretations of other men shall dismay us. So that if, on the one side, we shall be traduced by Popish Persons at home or abroad, who therefore will malign us, because we are poor instruments to make God’s holy Truth to be yet more and more known unto the people, whom they desire still to keep in ignorance and darkness; or if, on the other side, we shall be maligned by selfconceited Brethren, who run their own ways, and give liking unto nothing, but what is framed by themselves, and hammered on their anvil; we may rest secure, supported within by the truth and innocency of a good conscience, having walked the ways of simplicity and integrity, as before the Lord; and sustained without by the powerful protection of Your Majesty’s grace and favour, which will ever give countenance to honest and Christian endeavors against bitter censures and uncharitable imputations.
    
    The Lord of heaven and earth bless Your Majesty with many and happy days, that, as his heavenly hand hath enriched Your Highness with many singular and extraordinary graces, so You may be the wonder of the world in this latter age for happiness and true felicity, to the honour of that great GOD, and the good of his Church, through Jesus Christ our Lord and only Saviour.
    
    THE NAMES AND ORDER OF THE BOOKS OF THE HOLY BIBLE WITH THE NUMBER OF THEIR CHAPTERS
    
    THE BOOKS OF THE OLD TESTAMENT
    
    Genesis 50
    Exodus 40
    Leviticus 27
    Numbers 36
    Deuteronomy 34
    Joshua 24
    Judges 21
    Ruth 4
    1 Samuel 31
    2 Samuel 24
    1 Kings 22
    2 Kings 25
    1 Chronicles 29
    2 Chronicles 36
    Ezra 10
    Nehemiah 13
    Esther 10
    Job 42
    Psalms 150
    Proverbs 31
    Ecclesiastes 8
    Song of Songs 12
    Isaiah 66
    Jeremiah 52
    Lamentations 5
    Ezekiel 48
    Daniel 12
    Hosea 14
    Joel 3
    Amos 9
    Obadiah 1
    Jonah 4
    Micah 7
    Nahum 3
    Habakkuk 3
    Zephaniah 3
    Haggai 2
    Zechariah 14
    Malachi 4
    
    THE BOOKS OF THE NEW TESTAMENT
    
    Matthew 28
    Mark 16
    Luke 24
    John 21
    Acts 28
    Romans 16
    1 Corinthians 16
    2 Corinthians 13
    Galatians 6
    Ephesians 6
    Philippians 4
    Colossians 4
    1 Thessalonians 5
    2 Thessalonians 3
    1 Timothy 6
    2 Timothy 4
    Titus 3
    Philemon 1
    Hebrews 13
    James 5
    1 Peter 5
    2 Peter 3
    1 John 5
    2 John 1
    3 John 1
    Jude 1
    Revelation 22
    
    THE FIRST BOOK OF MOSES, CALLED GENESIS
    
    CHAPTER 1
    1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
    2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness [was] upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
    3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
    4 And God saw the light, that [it was] good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
    5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
    6 # And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
    7 And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which [were] under the firmament from the waters which [were] above the firmament: and it was so.
    8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
    9 # And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry [land] appear: and it was so.
    10 And God called the dry [land] Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that [it was] good.
    11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, [and] the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed [is] in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
    12 And the earth brought forth grass, [and] herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed [was] in itself, after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
    13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
    14 # And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:
    15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so.
    16 And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.
    17 And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,
    18 And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that [it was] good.
    19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
    20 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl [that] may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.
    21 And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
    22 And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.
    23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
    24 # And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.
    25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
    26 # And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
    27 So God created man in his [own] image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
    28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
    29 # And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which [is] upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which [is] the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.
    30 And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein [there is] life, [I have given] every green herb for meat: and it was so.
    31 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, [it was] very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.
    
    CHAPTER 2
    1 Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them.
    2 And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.
    3 And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.
    4 # These [are] the generations of the heavens and of the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens,
    5 And every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew: for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and [there was] not a man to till the ground.
    6 But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground.
    7 And the LORD God formed man [of] the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.
    8 # And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.
    9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
    10 And a river went out of Eden to water the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads.
    11 The name of the first [is] Pison: that [is] it which compasseth the whole land of Havilah, where [there is] gold;
    12 And the gold of that land [is] good: there [is] bdellium and the onyx stone.
    13 And the name of the second river [is] Gihon: the same [is] it that compasseth the whole land of Ethiopia.
    14 And the name of the third river [is] Hiddekel: that [is] it which goeth toward the east of Assyria. And the fourth river [is] Euphrates.
    15 And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.
    16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
    17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
    18 # And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
    19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought [them] unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that [was] the name thereof.
    20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
    21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
    22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
    23 And Adam said, This [is] now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
    24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
    25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
    
    CHAPTER 3
    1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
    2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:
    3 But of the fruit of the tree which [is] in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.
    4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
    5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.
    6 And when the woman saw that the tree [was] good for food, and that it [was] pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make [one] wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
    7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they [were] naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.
    8 And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.
    9 And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where [art] thou?
    10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I [was] naked; and I hid myself.
    11 And he said, Who told thee that thou [wast] naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?
    12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest [to be] with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.
    13 And the LORD God said unto the woman, What [is] this [that] thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.
    14 And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou [art] cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:
    15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
    16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire [shall be] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
    17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed [is] the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat [of] it all the days of thy life;
    18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;
    19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou [art], and unto dust shalt thou return.
    20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.
    21 Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of skins, and clothed them.
    22 # And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever:
    23 Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken.
    24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.
    
    CHAPTER 4
    1 And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.
    2 And she again bare his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground.
    3 And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD.
    4 And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering:
    5 But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.
    6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?
    7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee [shall be] his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.
    8 And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.
    9 # And the LORD said unto Cain, Where [is] Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: [Am] I my brother’s keeper?
    10 And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother’s blood crieth unto me from the ground.
    11 And now [art] thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother’s blood from thy hand;
    12 When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.
    13 And Cain said unto the LORD, My punishment [is] greater than I can bear.
    14 Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, [that] every one that findeth me shall slay me.
    15 And the LORD said unto him, Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And the LORD set a mark upon Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.
    16 # And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden.
    17 And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.
    18 And unto Enoch was born Irad: and Irad begat Mehujael: and Mehujael begat Methusael: and Methusael begat Lamech.
    19 # And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one [was] Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.
    20 And Adah bare Jabal: he was the father of such as dwell in tents, and [of such as have] cattle.
    21 And his brother’s name [was] Jubal: he was the father of all such as handle the harp and organ.
    22 And Zillah, she also bare Tubal-cain, an instructer of every artificer in brass and iron: and the sister of Tubal-cain [was] Naamah.
    23 And Lamech said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah, Hear my voice; ye wives of Lamech, hearken unto my speech: for I have slain a man to my wounding, and a young man to my hurt.
    24 If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy and sevenfold.
    25 # And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth: For God, [said she], hath appointed me another seed instead of Abel, whom Cain slew.
    26 And to Seth, to him also there was born a son; and he called his name Enos: then began men to call upon the name of the LORD.
    
    CHAPTER 5
    1 This [is] the book of the generations of Adam. In the day that God created man, in the likeness of God made he him;
    2 Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created.
    3 # And Adam lived an hundred and thirty years, and begat [a son] in his own likeness, after his image; and called his name Seth:
    4 And the days of Adam after he had begotten Seth were eight hundred years: and he begat sons and daughters:
    5 And all the days that Adam lived were nine hundred and thirty years: and he died.
    6 And Seth lived an hundred and five years, and begat Enos:
    7 And Seth lived after he begat Enos eight hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters:
    8 And all the days of Seth were nine hundred and twelve years: and he died.
    9 # And Enos lived ninety years, and begat Cainan:
    10 And Enos lived after he begat Cainan eight hundred and fifteen years, and begat sons and daughters:
    11 And all the days of Enos were nine hundred and five years: and he died.
    12 # And Cainan lived seventy years, and begat Mahalaleel:
    13 And Cainan lived after he begat Mahalaleel eight hundred and forty years, and begat sons and daughters:
    14 And all the days of Cainan were nine hundred and ten years: and he died.
    15 # And Mahalaleel lived sixty and five years, and begat Jared:
    16 And Mahalaleel lived after he begat Jared eight hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters:
    17 And all the days of Mahalaleel were eight hundred ninety and five years: and he died.
    18 # And Jared lived an hundred sixty and two years, and he begat Enoch:
    19 And Jared lived after he begat Enoch eight hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
    20 And all the days of Jared were nine hundred sixty and two years: and he died.
    21 # And Enoch lived sixty and five years, and begat Methuselah:
    22 And Enoch walked with God after he begat Methuselah three hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
    23 And all the days of Enoch were three hundred sixty and five years:
    24 And Enoch walked with God: and he [was] not; for God took him.
    25 And Methuselah lived an hundred eighty and seven years, and begat Lamech:
    26 And Methuselah lived after he begat Lamech seven hundred eighty and two years, and begat sons and daughters:
    27 And all the days of Methuselah were nine hundred sixty and nine years: and he died.
    28 # And Lamech lived an hundred eighty and two years, and begat a son:
    29 And he called his name Noah, saying, This [same] shall comfort us concerning our work and toil of our hands, because of the ground which the LORD hath cursed.
    30 And Lamech lived after he begat Noah five hundred ninety and five years, and begat sons and daughters:
    31 And all the days of Lamech were seven hundred seventy and seven years: and he died.
    32 And Noah was five hundred years old: and Noah begat Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
    
    CHAPTER 6
    1 And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them,
    2 That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they [were] fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose.
    3 And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also [is] flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.
    4 There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare [children] to them, the same [became] mighty men which [were] of old, men of renown.
    5 # And GOD saw that the wickedness of man [was] great in the earth, and [that] every imagination of the thoughts of his heart [was] only evil continually.
    6 And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart.
    7 And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them.
    8 But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD.
    9 # These [are] the generations of Noah: Noah was a just man [and] perfect in his generations, [and] Noah walked with God.
    10 And Noah begat three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
    11 The earth also was corrupt before God, and the earth was filled with violence.
    12 And God looked upon the earth, and, behold, it was corrupt; for all flesh had corrupted his way upon the earth.
    13 And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth.
    14 # Make thee an ark of gopher wood; rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch.
    15 And this [is the fashion] which thou shalt make it [of]: The length of the ark [shall be] three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.
    16 A window shalt thou make to the ark, and in a cubit shalt thou finish it above; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; [with] lower, second, and third [stories] shalt thou make it.
    17 And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life, from under heaven; [and] every thing that [is] in the earth shall die.
    18 But with thee will I establish my covenant; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
    19 And of every living thing of all flesh, two of every [sort] shalt thou bring into the ark, to keep [them] alive with thee; they shall be male and female.
    20 Of fowls after their kind, and of cattle after their kind, of every creeping thing of the earth after his kind, two of every [sort] shall come unto thee, to keep [them] alive.
    21 And take thou unto thee of all food that is eaten, and thou shalt gather [it] to thee; and it shall be for food for thee, and for them.
    22 Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he.
    
    CHAPTER 7
    1 And the LORD said unto Noah, Come thou and all thy house into the ark; for thee have I seen righteous before me in this generation.
    2 Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that [are] not clean by two, the male and his female.
    3 Of fowls also of the air by sevens, the male and the female; to keep seed alive upon the face of all the earth.
    4 For yet seven days, and I will cause it to rain upon the earth forty days and forty nights; and every living substance that I have made will I destroy from off the face of the earth.
    5 And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him.
    6 And Noah [was] six hundred years old when the flood of waters was upon the earth.
    7 # And Noah went in, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him, into the ark, because of the waters of the flood.
    8 Of clean beasts, and of beasts that [are] not clean, and of fowls, and of every thing that creepeth upon the earth,
    9 There went in two and two unto Noah into the ark, the male and the female, as God had commanded Noah.
    10 And it came to pass after seven days, that the waters of the flood were upon the earth.
    11 # In the six hundredth year of Noah’s life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.
    12 And the rain was upon the earth forty days and forty nights.
    13 In the selfsame day entered Noah, and Shem, and Ham, and Japheth, the sons of Noah, and Noah’s wife, and the three wives of his sons with them, into the ark;
    14 They, and every beast after his kind, and all the cattle after their kind, and every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind, and every fowl after his kind, every bird of every sort.
    15 And they went in unto Noah into the ark, two and two of all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life.
    16 And they that went in, went in male and female of all flesh, as God had commanded him: and the LORD shut him in.
    17 And the flood was forty days upon the earth; and the waters increased, and bare up the ark, and it was lift up above the earth.
    18 And the waters prevailed, and were increased greatly upon the earth; and the ark went upon the face of the waters.
    19 And the waters prevailed exceedingly upon the earth; and all the high hills, that [were] under the whole heaven, were covered.
    20 Fifteen cubits upward did the waters prevail; and the mountains were covered.
    21 And all flesh died that moved upon the earth, both of fowl, and of cattle, and of beast, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth, and every man:
    22 All in whose nostrils [was] the breath of life, of all that [was] in the dry [land], died.
    23 And every living substance was destroyed which was upon the face of the ground, both man, and cattle, and the creeping things, and the fowl of the heaven; and they were destroyed from the earth: and Noah only remained [alive], and they that [were] with him in the ark.
    24 And the waters prevailed upon the earth an hundred and fifty days.
    
    CHAPTER 8
    1 And God remembered Noah, and every living thing, and all the cattle that [was] with him in the ark: and God made a wind to pass over the earth, and the waters asswaged;
    2 The fountains also of the deep and the windows of heaven were stopped, and the rain from heaven was restrained;
    3 And the waters returned from off the earth continually: and after the end of the hundred and fifty days the waters were abated.
    4 And the ark rested in the seventh month, on the seventeenth day of the month, upon the mountains of Ararat.
    5 And the waters decreased continually until the tenth month: in the tenth [month], on the first [day] of the month, were the tops of the mountains seen.
    6 # And it came to pass at the end of forty days, that Noah opened the window of the ark which he had made:
    7 And he sent forth a raven, which went forth to and fro, until the waters were dried up from off the earth.
    8 Also he sent forth a dove from him, to see if the waters were abated from off the face of the ground;
    9 But the dove found no rest for the sole of her foot, and she returned unto him into the ark, for the waters [were] on the face of the whole earth: then he put forth his hand, and took her, and pulled her in unto him into the ark.
    10 And he stayed yet other seven days; and again he sent forth the dove out of the ark;
    11 And the dove came in to him in the evening; and, lo, in her mouth [was] an olive leaf pluckt off: so Noah knew that the waters were abated from off the earth.
    12 And he stayed yet other seven days; and sent forth the dove; which returned not again unto him any more.
    13 # And it came to pass in the six hundredth and first year, in the first [month], the first [day] of the month, the waters were dried up from off the earth: and Noah removed the covering of the ark, and looked, and, behold, the face of the ground was dry.
    14 And in the second month, on the seven and twentieth day of the month, was the earth dried.
    15 # And God spake unto Noah, saying,
    16 Go forth of the ark, thou, and thy wife, and thy sons, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
    17 Bring forth with thee every living thing that [is] with thee, of all flesh, [both] of fowl, and of cattle, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth; that they may breed abundantly in the earth, and be fruitful, and multiply upon the earth.
    18 And Noah went forth, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him:
    19 Every beast, every creeping thing, and every fowl, [and] whatsoever creepeth upon the earth, after their kinds, went forth out of the ark.
    20 # And Noah builded an altar unto the LORD; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar.
    21 And the LORD smelled a sweet savour; and the LORD said in his heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man’s sake; for the imagination of man’s heart [is] evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done.
    22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.
    
    CHAPTER 9
    1 And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.
    2 And the fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth, and upon every fowl of the air, upon all that moveth [upon] the earth, and upon all the fishes of the sea; into your hand are they delivered.
    3 Every moving thing that liveth shall be meat for you; even as the green herb have I given you all things.
    4 But flesh with the life thereof, [which is] the blood thereof, shall ye not eat.
    5 And surely your blood of your lives will I require; at the hand of every beast will I require it, and at the hand of man; at the hand of every man’s brother will I require the life of man.
    6 Whoso sheddeth man’s blood, by man shall his blood be shed: for in the image of God made he man.
    7 And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.
    8 # And God spake unto Noah, and to his sons with him, saying,
    9 And I, behold, I establish my covenant with you, and with your seed after you;
    10 And with every living creature that [is] with you, of the fowl, of the cattle, and of every beast of the earth with you; from all that go out of the ark, to every beast of the earth.
    11 And I will establish my covenant with you; neither shall all flesh be cut off any more by the waters of a flood; neither shall there any more be a flood to destroy the earth.
    12 And God said, This [is] the token of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that [is] with you, for perpetual generations:
    13 I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth.
    14 And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud:
    15 And I will remember my covenant, which [is] between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh.
    16 And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
    17 And God said unto Noah, This [is] the token of the covenant, which I have established between me and all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
    18 # And the sons of Noah, that went forth of the ark, were Shem, and Ham, and Japheth: and Ham [is] the father of Canaan.
    19 These [are] the three sons of Noah: and of them was the whole earth overspread.
    20 And Noah began [to be] an husbandman, and he planted a vineyard:
    21 And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.
    22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.
    23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid [it] upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces [were] backward, and they saw not their father’s nakedness.
    24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.
    25 And he said, Cursed [be] Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren.
    26 And he said, Blessed [be] the LORD God of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
    27 God shall enlarge Japheth, and he shall dwell in the tents of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
    28 # And Noah lived after the flood three hundred and fifty years.
    29 And all the days of Noah were nine hundred and fifty years: and he died.
    
    CHAPTER 10
    1 Now these [are] the generations of the sons of Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth: and unto them were sons born after the flood.
    2 The sons of Japheth; Gomer, and Magog, and Madai, and Javan, and Tubal, and Meshech, and Tiras.
    3 And the sons of Gomer; Ashkenaz, and Riphath, and Togarmah.
    4 And the sons of Javan; Elishah, and Tarshish, Kittim, and Dodanim.
    5 By these were the isles of the Gentiles divided in their lands; every one after his tongue, after their families, in their nations.
    6 # And the sons of Ham; Cush, and Mizraim, and Phut, and Canaan.
    7 And the sons of Cush; Seba, and Havilah, and Sabtah, and Raamah, and Sabtecha: and the sons of Raamah; Sheba, and Dedan.
    8 And Cush begat Nimrod: he began to be a mighty one in the earth.
    9 He was a mighty hunter before the LORD: wherefore it is said, Even as Nimrod the mighty hunter before the LORD.
    10 And the beginning of his kingdom was Babel, and Erech, and Accad, and Calneh, in the land of Shinar.
    11 Out of that land went forth Asshur, and builded Nineveh, and the city Rehoboth, and Calah,
    12 And Resen between Nineveh and Calah: the same [is] a great city.
    13 And Mizraim begat Ludim, and Anamim, and Lehabim, and Naphtuhim,
    14 And Pathrusim, and Casluhim, (out of whom came Philistim,) and Caphtorim.
    15 # And Canaan begat Sidon his firstborn, and Heth,
    16 And the Jebusite, and the Amorite, and the Girgasite,
    17 And the Hivite, and the Arkite, and the Sinite,
    18 And the Arvadite, and the Zemarite, and the Hamathite: and afterward were the families of the Canaanites spread abroad.
    19 And the border of the Canaanites was from Sidon, as thou comest to Gerar, unto Gaza; as thou goest, unto Sodom, and Gomorrah, and Admah, and Zeboim, even unto Lasha.
    20 These [are] the sons of Ham, after their families, after their tongues, in their countries, [and] in their nations.
    21 # Unto Shem also, the father of all the children of Eber, the brother of Japheth the elder, even to him were [children] born.
    22 The children of Shem; Elam, and Asshur, and Arphaxad, and Lud, and Aram.
    23 And the children of Aram; Uz, and Hul, and Gether, and Mash.
    24 And Arphaxad begat Salah; and Salah begat Eber.
    25 And unto Eber were born two sons: the name of one [was] Peleg; for in his days was the earth divided; and his brother’s name [was] Joktan.
    26 And Joktan begat Almodad, and Sheleph, and Hazarmaveth, and Jerah,
    27 And Hadoram, and Uzal, and Diklah,
    28 And Obal, and Abimael, and Sheba,
    29 And Ophir, and Havilah, and Jobab: all these [were] the sons of Joktan.
    30 And their dwelling was from Mesha, as thou goest unto Sephar a mount of the east.
    31 These [are] the sons of Shem, after their families, after their tongues, in their lands, after their nations.
    32 These [are] the families of the sons of Noah, after their generations, in their nations: and by these were the nations divided in the earth after the flood.
    
    CHAPTER 11
    1 And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech.
    2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there.
    3 And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them throughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for morter.
    4 And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top [may reach] unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.
    5 And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded.
    6 And the LORD said, Behold, the people [is] one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do.
    7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.
    8 So the LORD scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.
    9 Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the LORD did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the LORD scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth.
    10 # These [are] the generations of Shem: Shem [was] an hundred years old, and begat Arphaxad two years after the flood:
    11 And Shem lived after he begat Arphaxad five hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
    12 And Arphaxad lived five and thirty years, and begat Salah:
    13 And Arphaxad lived after he begat Salah four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
    14 And Salah lived thirty years, and begat Eber:
    15 And Salah lived after he begat Eber four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
    16 And Eber lived four and thirty years, and begat Peleg:
    17 And Eber lived after he begat Peleg four hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters.
    18 And Peleg lived thirty years, and begat Reu:
    19 And Peleg lived after he begat Reu two hundred and nine years, and begat sons and daughters.
    20 And Reu lived two and thirty years, and begat Serug:
    21 And Reu lived after he begat Serug two hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters.
    22 And Serug lived thirty years, and begat Nahor:
    23 And Serug lived after he begat Nahor two hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
    24 And Nahor lived nine and twenty years, and begat Terah:
    25 And Nahor lived after he begat Terah an hundred and nineteen years, and begat sons and daughters.
    26 And Terah lived seventy years, and begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran.
    27 # Now these [are] the generations of Terah: Terah begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran; and Haran begat Lot.
    28 And Haran died before his father Terah in the land of his nativity, in Ur of the Chaldees.
    29 And Abram and Nahor took them wives: the name of Abram’s wife [was] Sarai; and the name of Nahor’s wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran, the father of Milcah, and the father of Iscah.
    30 But Sarai was barren; she [had] no child.
    31 And Terah took Abram his son, and Lot the son of Haran his son’s son, and Sarai his daughter in law, his son Abram’s wife; and they went forth with them from Ur of the Chaldees, to go into the land of Canaan; and they came unto Haran, and dwelt there.
    32 And the days of Terah were two hundred and five years: and Terah died in Haran.
    
    CHAPTER 12
    1 Now the LORD had said unto Abram, Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father’s house, unto a land that I will shew thee:
    2 And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing:
    3 And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed.
    4 So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram [was] seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran.
    5 And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother’s son, and all their substance that they had gathered, and the souls that they had gotten in Haran; and they went forth to go into the land of Canaan; and into the land of Canaan they came.
    6 # And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite [was] then in the land.
    7 And the LORD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the LORD, who appeared unto him.
    8 And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Beth-el, and pitched his tent, [having] Beth-el on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD.
    9 And Abram journeyed, going on still toward the south.
    10 # And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine [was] grievous in the land.
    11 And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou [art] a fair woman to look upon:
    12 Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This [is] his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive.
    13 Say, I pray thee, thou [art] my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
    14 # And it came to pass, that, when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she [was] very fair.
    15 The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into Pharaoh’s house.
    16 And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels.
    17 And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram’s wife.
    18 And Pharaoh called Abram, and said, What [is] this [that] thou hast done unto me? why didst thou not tell me that she [was] thy wife?
    19 Why saidst thou, She [is] my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take [her], and go thy way.
    20 And Pharaoh commanded [his] men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.
    
    CHAPTER 13
    1 And Abram went up out of Egypt, he, and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the south.
    2 And Abram [was] very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold.
    3 And he went on his journeys from the south even to Beth-el, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Beth-el and Hai;
    4 Unto the place of the altar, which he had made there at the first: and there Abram called on the name of the LORD.
    5 # And Lot also, which went with Abram, had flocks, and herds, and tents.
    6 And the land was not able to bear them, that they might dwell together: for their substance was great, so that they could not dwell together.
    7 And there was a strife between the herdmen of Abram’s cattle and the herdmen of Lot’s cattle: and the Canaanite and the Perizzite dwelled then in the land.
    8 And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we [be] brethren.
    9 [Is] not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: if [thou wilt take] the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if [thou depart] to the right hand, then I will go to the left.
    10 And Lot lifted up his eyes, and beheld all the plain of Jordan, that it [was] well watered every where, before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, [even] as the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt, as thou comest unto Zoar.
    11 Then Lot chose him all the plain of Jordan; and Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other.
    12 Abram dwelled in the land of Canaan, and Lot dwelled in the cities of the plain, and pitched [his] tent toward Sodom.
    13 But the men of Sodom [were] wicked and sinners before the LORD exceedingly.
    14 # And the LORD said unto Abram, after that Lot was separated from him, Lift up now thine eyes, and look from the place where thou art northward, and southward, and eastward, and westward:
    15 For all the land which thou seest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed for ever.
    16 And I will make thy seed as the dust of the earth: so that if a man can number the dust of the earth, [then] shall thy seed also be numbered.
    17 Arise, walk through the land in the length of it and in the breadth of it; for I will give it unto thee.
    18 Then Abram removed [his] tent, and came and dwelt in the plain of Mamre, which [is] in Hebron, and built there an altar unto the LORD.
    
    CHAPTER 14
    1 And it came to pass in the days of Amraphel king of Shinar, Arioch king of Ellasar, Chedorlaomer king of Elam, and Tidal king of nations;
    2 [That these] made war with Bera king of Sodom, and with Birsha king of Gomorrah, Shinab king of Admah, and Shemeber king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela, which is Zoar.
    3 All these were joined together in the vale of Siddim, which is the salt sea.
    4 Twelve years they served Chedorlaomer, and in the thirteenth year they rebelled.
    5 And in the fourteenth year came Chedorlaomer, and the kings that [were] with him, and smote the Rephaims in Ashteroth Karnaim, and the Zuzims in Ham, and the Emims in Shaveh Kiriathaim,
    6 And the Horites in their mount Seir, unto El-paran, which [is] by the wilderness.
    7 And they returned, and came to En-mishpat, which [is] Kadesh, and smote all the country of the Amalekites, and also the Amorites, that dwelt in Hazezon-tamar.
    8 And there went out the king of Sodom, and the king of Gomorrah, and the king of Admah, and the king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela (the same [is] Zoar;) and they joined battle with them in the vale of Siddim;
    9 With Chedorlaomer the king of Elam, and with Tidal king of nations, and Amraphel king of Shinar, and Arioch king of Ellasar; four kings with five.
    10 And the vale of Siddim [was full of] slimepits; and the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah fled, and fell there; and they that remained fled to the mountain.
    11 And they took all the goods of Sodom and Gomorrah, and all their victuals, and went their way.
    12 And they took Lot, Abram’s brother’s son, who dwelt in Sodom, and his goods, and departed.
    13 And there came one that had escaped, and told Abram the Hebrew; for he dwelt in the plain of Mamre the Amorite, brother of Eshcol, and brother of Aner: and these [were] confederate with Abram.
    14 And when Abram heard that his brother was taken captive, he armed his trained [servants], born in his own house, three hundred and eighteen, and pursued [them] unto Dan.
    15 And he divided himself against them, he and his servants, by night, and smote them, and pursued them unto Hobah, which [is] on the left hand of Damascus.
    16 And he brought back all the goods, and also brought again his brother Lot, and his goods, and the women also, and the people.
    17 # And the king of Sodom went out to meet him after his return from the slaughter of Chedorlaomer, and of the kings that [were] with him, at the valley of Shaveh, which [is] the king’s dale.
    18 And Melchizedek king of Salem brought forth bread and wine: and he [was] the priest of the most high God.
    19 And he blessed him, and said, Blessed [be] Abram of the most high God, possessor of heaven and earth:
    20 And blessed be the most high God, which hath delivered thine enemies into thy hand. And he gave him tithes of all.
    21 And the king of Sodom said unto Abram, Give me the persons, and take the goods to thyself.
    22 And Abram said to the king of Sodom, I have lift up mine hand unto the LORD, the most high God, the possessor of heaven and earth,
    23 That I will not [take] from a thread even to a shoelatchet, and that I will not take any thing that [is] thine, lest thou shouldest say, I have made Abram rich:
    24 Save only that which the young men have eaten, and the portion of the men which went with me, Aner, Eshcol, and Mamre; let them take their portion.
    
    CHAPTER 15
    1 After these things the word of the LORD came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I [am] thy shield, [and] thy exceeding great reward.
    2 And Abram said, Lord GOD, what wilt thou give me, seeing I go childless, and the steward of my house [is] this Eliezer of Damascus?
    3 And Abram said, Behold, to me thou hast given no seed: and, lo, one born in my house is mine heir.
    4 And, behold, the word of the LORD [came] unto him, saying, This shall not be thine heir; but he that shall come forth out of thine own bowels shall be thine heir.
    5 And he brought him forth abroad, and said, Look now toward heaven, and tell the stars, if thou be able to number them: and he said unto him, So shall thy seed be.
    6 And he believed in the LORD; and he counted it to him for righteousness.
    7 And he said unto him, I [am] the LORD that brought thee out of Ur of the Chaldees, to give thee this land to inherit it.
    8 And he said, Lord GOD, whereby shall I know that I shall inherit it?
    9 And he said unto him, Take me an heifer of three years old, and a she goat of three years old, and a ram of three years old, and a turtledove, and a young pigeon.
    10 And he took unto him all these, and divided them in the midst, and laid each piece one against another: but the birds divided he not.
    11 And when the fowls came down upon the carcases, Abram drove them away.
    12 And when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and, lo, an horror of great darkness fell upon him.
    13 And he said unto Abram, Know of a surety that thy seed shall be a stranger in a land [that is] not their’s, and shall serve them; and they shall afflict them four hundred years;
    14 And also that nation, whom they shall serve, will I judge: and afterward shall they come out with great substance.
    15 And thou shalt go to thy fathers in peace; thou shalt be buried in a good old age.
    16 But in the fourth generation they shall come hither again: for the iniquity of the Amorites [is] not yet full.
    17 And it came to pass, that, when the sun went down, and it was dark, behold a smoking furnace, and a burning lamp that passed between those pieces.
    18 In the same day the LORD made a covenant with Abram, saying, Unto thy seed have I given this land, from the river of Egypt unto the great river, the river Euphrates:
    19 The Kenites, and the Kenizzites, and the Kadmonites,
    20 And the Hittites, and the Perizzites, and the Rephaims,
    21 And the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Girgashites, and the Jebusites.
    
    CHAPTER 16
    1 Now Sarai Abram’s wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name [was] Hagar.
    2 And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai.
    3 And Sarai Abram’s wife took Hagar her maid the Egyptian, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan, and gave her to her husband Abram to be his wife.
    4 # And he went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes.
    5 And Sarai said unto Abram, My wrong [be] upon thee: I have given my maid into thy bosom; and when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes: the LORD judge between me and thee.
    6 But Abram said unto Sarai, Behold, thy maid [is] in thy hand; do to her as it pleaseth thee. And when Sarai dealt hardly with her, she fled from her face.
    7 # And the angel of the LORD found her by a fountain of water in the wilderness, by the fountain in the way to Shur.
    8 And he said, Hagar, Sarai’s maid, whence camest thou? and whither wilt thou go? And she said, I flee from the face of my mistress Sarai.
    9 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Return to thy mistress, and submit thyself under her hands.
    10 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, I will multiply thy seed exceedingly, that it shall not be numbered for multitude.
    11 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Behold, thou [art] with child, and shalt bear a son, and shalt call his name Ishmael; because the LORD hath heard thy affliction.
    12 And he will be a wild man; his hand [will be] against every man, and every man’s hand against him; and he shall dwell in the presence of all his brethren.
    13 And she called the name of the LORD that spake unto her, Thou God seest me: for she said, Have I also here looked after him that seeth me?
    14 Wherefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi; behold, [it is] between Kadesh and Bered.
    15 # And Hagar bare Abram a son: and Abram called his son’s name, which Hagar bare, Ishmael.
    16 And Abram [was] fourscore and six years old, when Hagar bare Ishmael to Abram.
    
    CHAPTER 17
    1 And when Abram was ninety years old and nine, the LORD appeared to Abram, and said unto him, I [am] the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect.
    2 And I will make my covenant between me and thee, and will multiply thee exceedingly.
    3 And Abram fell on his face: and God talked with him, saying,
    4 As for me, behold, my covenant [is] with thee, and thou shalt be a father of many nations.
    5 Neither shall thy name any more be called Abram, but thy name shall be Abraham; for a father of many nations have I made thee.
    6 And I will make thee exceeding fruitful, and I will make nations of thee, and kings shall come out of thee.
    7 And I will establish my covenant between me and thee and thy seed after thee in their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be a God unto thee, and to thy seed after thee.
    8 And I will give unto thee, and to thy seed after thee, the land wherein thou art a stranger, all the land of Canaan, for an everlasting possession; and I will be their God.
    9 # And God said unto Abraham, Thou shalt keep my covenant therefore, thou, and thy seed after thee in their generations.
    10 This [is] my covenant, which ye shall keep, between me and you and thy seed after thee; Every man child among you shall be circumcised.
    11 And ye shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskin; and it shall be a token of the covenant betwixt me and you.
    12 And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every man child in your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any stranger, which [is] not of thy seed.
    13 He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised: and my covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant.
    14 And the uncircumcised man child whose flesh of his foreskin is not circumcised, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken my covenant.
    15 # And God said unto Abraham, As for Sarai thy wife, thou shalt not call her name Sarai, but Sarah [shall] her name [be].
    16 And I will bless her, and give thee a son also of her: yea, I will bless her, and she shall be [a mother] of nations; kings of people shall be of her.
    17 Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall [a child] be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?
    18 And Abraham said unto God, O that Ishmael might live before thee!
    19 And God said, Sarah thy wife shall bear thee a son indeed; and thou shalt call his name Isaac: and I will establish my covenant with him for an everlasting covenant, [and] with his seed after him.
    20 And as for Ishmael, I have heard thee: Behold, I have blessed him, and will make him fruitful, and will multiply him exceedingly; twelve princes shall he beget, and I will make him a great nation.
    21 But my covenant will I establish with Isaac, which Sarah shall bear unto thee at this set time in the next year.
    22 And he left off talking with him, and God went up from Abraham.
    23 # And Abraham took Ishmael his son, and all that were born in his house, and all that were bought with his money, every male among the men of Abraham’s house; and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin in the selfsame day, as God had said unto him.
    24 And Abraham [was] ninety years old and nine, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
    25 And Ishmael his son [was] thirteen years old, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
    26 In the selfsame day was Abraham circumcised, and Ishmael his son.
    27 And all the men of his house, born in the house, and bought with money of the stranger, were circumcised with him.
    
    CHAPTER 18
    1 And the LORD appeared unto him in the plains of Mamre: and he sat in the tent door in the heat of the day;
    2 And he lift up his eyes and looked, and, lo, three men stood by him: and when he saw [them], he ran to meet them from the tent door, and bowed himself toward the ground,
    3 And said, My Lord, if now I have found favour in thy sight, pass not away, I pray thee, from thy servant:
    4 Let a little water, I pray you, be fetched, and wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree:
    5 And I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort ye your hearts; after that ye shall pass on: for therefore are ye come to your servant. And they said, So do, as thou hast said.
    6 And Abraham hastened into the tent unto Sarah, and said, Make ready quickly three measures of fine meal, knead [it], and make cakes upon the hearth.
    7 And Abraham ran unto the herd, and fetcht a calf tender and good, and gave [it] unto a young man; and he hasted to dress it.
    8 And he took butter, and milk, and the calf which he had dressed, and set [it] before them; and he stood by them under the tree, and they did eat.
    9 # And they said unto him, Where [is] Sarah thy wife? And he said, Behold, in the tent.
    10 And he said, I will certainly return unto thee according to the time of life; and, lo, Sarah thy wife shall have a son. And Sarah heard [it] in the tent door, which [was] behind him.
    11 Now Abraham and Sarah [were] old [and] well stricken in age; [and] it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.
    12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?
    13 And the LORD said unto Abraham, Wherefore did Sarah laugh, saying, Shall I of a surety bear a child, which am old?
    14 Is any thing too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.
    15 Then Sarah denied, saying, I laughed not; for she was afraid. And he said, Nay; but thou didst laugh.
    16 # And the men rose up from thence, and looked toward Sodom: and Abraham went with them to bring them on the way.
    17 And the LORD said, Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do;
    18 Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him?
    19 For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.
    20 And the LORD said, Because the cry of Sodom and Gomorrah is great, and because their sin is very grievous;
    21 I will go down now, and see whether they have done altogether according to the cry of it, which is come unto me; and if not, I will know.
    22 And the men turned their faces from thence, and went toward Sodom: but Abraham stood yet before the LORD.
    23 # And Abraham drew near, and said, Wilt thou also destroy the righteous with the wicked?
    24 Peradventure there be fifty righteous within the city: wilt thou also destroy and not spare the place for the fifty righteous that [are] therein?
    25 That be far from thee to do after this manner, to slay the righteous with the wicked: and that the righteous should be as the wicked, that be far from thee: Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?
    26 And the LORD said, If I find in Sodom fifty righteous within the city, then I will spare all the place for their sakes.
    27 And Abraham answered and said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord, which [am but] dust and ashes:
    28 Peradventure there shall lack five of the fifty righteous: wilt thou destroy all the city for [lack of] five? And he said, If I find there forty and five, I will not destroy [it].
    29 And he spake unto him yet again, and said, Peradventure there shall be forty found there. And he said, I will not do [it] for forty’s sake.
    30 And he said [unto him], Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak: Peradventure there shall thirty be found there. And he said, I will not do [it], if I find thirty there.
    31 And he said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord: Peradventure there shall be twenty found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for twenty’s sake.
    32 And he said, Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak yet but this once: Peradventure ten shall be found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for ten’s sake.
    33 And the LORD went his way, as soon as he had left communing with Abraham: and Abraham returned unto his place.
    
    CHAPTER 19
    1 And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing [them] rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face toward the ground;
    2 And he said, Behold now, my lords, turn in, I pray you, into your servant’s house, and tarry all night, and wash your feet, and ye shall rise up early, and go on your ways. And they said, Nay; but we will abide in the street all night.
    3 And he pressed upon them greatly; and they turned in unto him, and entered into his house; and he made them a feast, and did bake unleavened bread, and they did eat.
    4 # But before they lay down, the men of the city, [even] the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:
    5 And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where [are] the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.
    6 And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him,
    7 And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly.
    8 Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as [is] good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.
    9 And they said, Stand back. And they said [again], This one [fellow] came in to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them. And they pressed sore upon the man, [even] Lot, and came near to break the door.
    10 But the men put forth their hand, and pulled Lot into the house to them, and shut to the door.
    11 And they smote the men that [were] at the door of the house with blindness, both small and great: so that they wearied themselves to find the door.
    12 # And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring [them] out of this place:
    13 For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the LORD; and the LORD hath sent us to destroy it.
    14 And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the LORD will destroy this city. But he seemed as one that mocked unto his sons in law.
    15 # And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city.
    16 And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife, a
    
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  - Bill DDoltree says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 9:46 pm
    
    ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ ☃ 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- Didn't get the whole thing says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:33 pm
  
  ch hath so bound and firmly knit the hearts of all Your Majesty’s loyal and religious people unto You, that Your very name is precious among them: their eye doth behold You with comfort, and they bless You in their hearts, as that sanctified Person, who, under God, is the immediate Author of their true happiness. And this their contentment doth not diminish or decay, but every day increaseth and taketh strength, when they observe, that the zeal of Your Majesty toward the house of God doth not slack or go backward, but is more and more kindled, manifesting itself abroad in the farthest parts of [Christendom], by writing in defence of the Truth, (which hath given such a blow unto that man of Sin, as will not be healed,) and every day at home, by religious and learned discourse, by frequenting the house of God, by hearing the Word preached, by cherishing the Teachers thereof, by caring for the Church, as a most tender and loving nursing Father.
  
  There are infinite arguments of this right Christian and religious affection in Your Majesty; but none is more forcible to declare it to others than the vehement and perpetuated desire of accomplishing and publishing of this work, which now with all humility we present unto Your Majesty. For when Your Highness had once out of deep judgment apprehended how convenient it was, that out of the Original Sacred Tongues, together with comparing of the labours, both in our own, and other foreign Languages, of many worthy men who went before us, there should be one more exact Translation of the holy Scriptures into the [English Tongue]; Your Majesty did never desist to urge and to excite those to whom it was commended, that the work might be hastened, and that the business might be expedited in so decent a manner, as a matter of such importance might justly require.
  
  And now at last, by the mercy of God, and the continuance of our labours, it being brought unto such a conclusion, as that we have great hopes that the Church of [England] shall reap good fruit thereby; we hold it our duty to offer it to Your Majesty, not only as to our King and Sovereign, but as to the principal Mover and Author of the work: humbly craving of Your most Sacred Majesty, that since things of this quality have ever been subject to the censures of illmeaning and discontented persons, it may receive approbation and patronage from so learned and judicious a Prince as Your Highness is, whose allowance and acceptance of our labours shall more honour and encourage us, than all the calumniations and hard interpretations of other men shall dismay us. So that if, on the one side, we shall be traduced by Popish Persons at home or abroad, who therefore will malign us, because we are poor instruments to make God’s holy Truth to be yet more and more known unto the people, whom they desire still to keep in ignorance and darkness; or if, on the other side, we shall be maligned by selfconceited Brethren, who run their own ways, and give liking unto nothing, but what is framed by themselves, and hammered on their anvil; we may rest secure, supported within by the truth and innocency of a good conscience, having walked the ways of simplicity and integrity, as before the Lord; and sustained without by the powerful protection of Your Majesty’s grace and favour, which will ever give countenance to honest and Christian endeavors against bitter censures and uncharitable imputations.
  
  The Lord of heaven and earth bless Your Majesty with many and happy days, that, as his heavenly hand hath enriched Your Highness with many singular and extraordinary graces, so You may be the wonder of the world in this latter age for happiness and true felicity, to the honour of that great GOD, and the good of his Church, through Jesus Christ our Lord and only Saviour.
  
  THE NAMES AND ORDER OF THE BOOKS OF THE HOLY BIBLE WITH THE NUMBER OF THEIR CHAPTERS
  
  THE BOOKS OF THE OLD TESTAMENT
  
  Genesis 50
  Exodus 40
  Leviticus 27
  Numbers 36
  Deuteronomy 34
  Joshua 24
  Judges 21
  Ruth 4
  1 Samuel 31
  2 Samuel 24
  1 Kings 22
  2 Kings 25
  1 Chronicles 29
  2 Chronicles 36
  Ezra 10
  Nehemiah 13
  Esther 10
  Job 42
  Psalms 150
  Proverbs 31
  Ecclesiastes 8
  Song of Songs 12
  Isaiah 66
  Jeremiah 52
  Lamentations 5
  Ezekiel 48
  Daniel 12
  Hosea 14
  Joel 3
  Amos 9
  Obadiah 1
  Jonah 4
  Micah 7
  Nahum 3
  Habakkuk 3
  Zephaniah 3
  Haggai 2
  Zechariah 14
  Malachi 4
  
  THE BOOKS OF THE NEW TESTAMENT
  
  Matthew 28
  Mark 16
  Luke 24
  John 21
  Acts 28
  Romans 16
  1 Corinthians 16
  2 Corinthians 13
  Galatians 6
  Ephesians 6
  Philippians 4
  Colossians 4
  1 Thessalonians 5
  2 Thessalonians 3
  1 Timothy 6
  2 Timothy 4
  Titus 3
  Philemon 1
  Hebrews 13
  James 5
  1 Peter 5
  2 Peter 3
  1 John 5
  2 John 1
  3 John 1
  Jude 1
  Revelation 22
  
  THE FIRST BOOK OF MOSES, CALLED GENESIS
  
  CHAPTER 1
  1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
  2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness [was] upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
  3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
  4 And God saw the light, that [it was] good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
  5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
  6 # And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
  7 And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which [were] under the firmament from the waters which [were] above the firmament: and it was so.
  8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
  9 # And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry [land] appear: and it was so.
  10 And God called the dry [land] Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that [it was] good.
  11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, [and] the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed [is] in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
  12 And the earth brought forth grass, [and] herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed [was] in itself, after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
  13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
  14 # And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:
  15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so.
  16 And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.
  17 And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,
  18 And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that [it was] good.
  19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
  20 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl [that] may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.
  21 And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
  22 And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.
  23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
  24 # And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.
  25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
  26 # And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
  27 So God created man in his [own] image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
  28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
  29 # And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which [is] upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which [is] the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.
  30 And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein [there is] life, [I have given] every green herb for meat: and it was so.
  31 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, [it was] very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.
  
  CHAPTER 2
  1 Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them.
  2 And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.
  3 And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.
  4 # These [are] the generations of the heavens and of the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens,
  5 And every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew: for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and [there was] not a man to till the ground.
  6 But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground.
  7 And the LORD God formed man [of] the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.
  8 # And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.
  9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
  10 And a river went out of Eden to water the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads.
  11 The name of the first [is] Pison: that [is] it which compasseth the whole land of Havilah, where [there is] gold;
  12 And the gold of that land [is] good: there [is] bdellium and the onyx stone.
  13 And the name of the second river [is] Gihon: the same [is] it that compasseth the whole land of Ethiopia.
  14 And the name of the third river [is] Hiddekel: that [is] it which goeth toward the east of Assyria. And the fourth river [is] Euphrates.
  15 And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.
  16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
  17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
  18 # And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
  19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought [them] unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that [was] the name thereof.
  20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
  21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
  22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
  23 And Adam said, This [is] now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
  24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
  25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
  
  CHAPTER 3
  1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
  2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:
  3 But of the fruit of the tree which [is] in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.
  4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
  5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.
  6 And when the woman saw that the tree [was] good for food, and that it [was] pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make [one] wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
  7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they [were] naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.
  8 And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.
  9 And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where [art] thou?
  10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I [was] naked; and I hid myself.
  11 And he said, Who told thee that thou [wast] naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?
  12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest [to be] with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.
  13 And the LORD God said unto the woman, What [is] this [that] thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.
  14 And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou [art] cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:
  15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
  16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire [shall be] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
  17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed [is] the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat [of] it all the days of thy life;
  18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;
  19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou [art], and unto dust shalt thou return.
  20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.
  21 Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of skins, and clothed them.
  22 # And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever:
  23 Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken.
  24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.
  
  CHAPTER 4
  1 And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.
  2 And she again bare his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground.
  3 And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD.
  4 And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering:
  5 But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.
  6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?
  7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee [shall be] his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.
  8 And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.
  9 # And the LORD said unto Cain, Where [is] Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: [Am] I my brother’s keeper?
  10 And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother’s blood crieth unto me from the ground.
  11 And now [art] thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother’s blood from thy hand;
  12 When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.
  13 And Cain said unto the LORD, My punishment [is] greater than I can bear.
  14 Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, [that] every one that findeth me shall slay me.
  15 And the LORD said unto him, Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And the LORD set a mark upon Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.
  16 # And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden.
  17 And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.
  18 And unto Enoch was born Irad: and Irad begat Mehujael: and Mehujael begat Methusael: and Methusael begat Lamech.
  19 # And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one [was] Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.
  20 And Adah bare Jabal: he was the father of such as dwell in tents, and [of such as have] cattle.
  21 And his brother’s name [was] Jubal: he was the father of all such as handle the harp and organ.
  22 And Zillah, she also bare Tubal-cain, an instructer of every artificer in brass and iron: and the sister of Tubal-cain [was] Naamah.
  23 And Lamech said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah, Hear my voice; ye wives of Lamech, hearken unto my speech: for I have slain a man to my wounding, and a young man to my hurt.
  24 If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy and sevenfold.
  25 # And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth: For God, [said she], hath appointed me another seed instead of Abel, whom Cain slew.
  26 And to Seth, to him also there was born a son; and he called his name Enos: then began men to call upon the name of the LORD.
  
  CHAPTER 5
  1 This [is] the book of the generations of Adam. In the day that God created man, in the likeness of God made he him;
  2 Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created.
  3 # And Adam lived an hundred and thirty years, and begat [a son] in his own likeness, after his image; and called his name Seth:
  4 And the days of Adam after he had begotten Seth were eight hundred years: and he begat sons and daughters:
  5 And all the days that Adam lived were nine hundred and thirty years: and he died.
  6 And Seth lived an hundred and five years, and begat Enos:
  7 And Seth lived after he begat Enos eight hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters:
  8 And all the days of Seth were nine hundred and twelve years: and he died.
  9 # And Enos lived ninety years, and begat Cainan:
  10 And Enos lived after he begat Cainan eight hundred and fifteen years, and begat sons and daughters:
  11 And all the days of Enos were nine hundred and five years: and he died.
  12 # And Cainan lived seventy years, and begat Mahalaleel:
  13 And Cainan lived after he begat Mahalaleel eight hundred and forty years, and begat sons and daughters:
  14 And all the days of Cainan were nine hundred and ten years: and he died.
  15 # And Mahalaleel lived sixty and five years, and begat Jared:
  16 And Mahalaleel lived after he begat Jared eight hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters:
  17 And all the days of Mahalaleel were eight hundred ninety and five years: and he died.
  18 # And Jared lived an hundred sixty and two years, and he begat Enoch:
  19 And Jared lived after he begat Enoch eight hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
  20 And all the days of Jared were nine hundred sixty and two years: and he died.
  21 # And Enoch lived sixty and five years, and begat Methuselah:
  22 And Enoch walked with God after he begat Methuselah three hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
  23 And all the days of Enoch were three hundred sixty and five years:
  24 And Enoch walked with God: and he [was] not; for God took him.
  25 And Methuselah lived an hundred eighty and seven years, and begat Lamech:
  26 And Methuselah lived after he begat Lamech seven hundred eighty and two years, and begat sons and daughters:
  27 And all the days of Methuselah were nine hundred sixty and nine years: and he died.
  28 # And Lamech lived an hundred eighty and two years, and begat a son:
  29 And he called his name Noah, saying, This [same] shall comfort us concerning our work and toil of our hands, because of the ground which the LORD hath cursed.
  30 And Lamech lived after he begat Noah five hundred ninety and five years, and begat sons and daughters:
  31 And all the days of Lamech were seven hundred seventy and seven years: and he died.
  32 And Noah was five hundred years old: and Noah begat Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
  
  CHAPTER 6
  1 And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them,
  2 That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they [were] fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose.
  3 And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also [is] flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.
  4 There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare [children] to them, the same [became] mighty men which [were] of old, men of renown.
  5 # And GOD saw that the wickedness of man [was] great in the earth, and [that] every imagination of the thoughts of his heart [was] only evil continually.
  6 And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart.
  7 And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them.
  8 But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD.
  9 # These [are] the generations of Noah: Noah was a just man [and] perfect in his generations, [and] Noah walked with God.
  10 And Noah begat three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
  11 The earth also was corrupt before God, and the earth was filled with violence.
  12 And God looked upon the earth, and, behold, it was corrupt; for all flesh had corrupted his way upon the earth.
  13 And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth.
  14 # Make thee an ark of gopher wood; rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch.
  15 And this [is the fashion] which thou shalt make it [of]: The length of the ark [shall be] three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.
  16 A window shalt thou make to the ark, and in a cubit shalt thou finish it above; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; [with] lower, second, and third [stories] shalt thou make it.
  17 And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life, from under heaven; [and] every thing that [is] in the earth shall die.
  18 But with thee will I establish my covenant; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
  19 And of every living thing of all flesh, two of every [sort] shalt thou bring into the ark, to keep [them] alive with thee; they shall be male and female.
  20 Of fowls after their kind, and of cattle after their kind, of every creeping thing of the earth after his kind, two of every [sort] shall come unto thee, to keep [them] alive.
  21 And take thou unto thee of all food that is eaten, and thou shalt gather [it] to thee; and it shall be for food for thee, and for them.
  22 Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he.
  
  CHAPTER 7
  1 And the LORD said unto Noah, Come thou and all thy house into the ark; for thee have I seen righteous before me in this generation.
  2 Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that [are] not clean by two, the male and his female.
  3 Of fowls also of the air by sevens, the male and the female; to keep seed alive upon the face of all the earth.
  4 For yet seven days, and I will cause it to rain upon the earth forty days and forty nights; and every living substance that I have made will I destroy from off the face of the earth.
  5 And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him.
  6 And Noah [was] six hundred years old when the flood of waters was upon the earth.
  7 # And Noah went in, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him, into the ark, because of the waters of the flood.
  8 Of clean beasts, and of beasts that [are] not clean, and of fowls, and of every thing that creepeth upon the earth,
  9 There went in two and two unto Noah into the ark, the male and the female, as God had commanded Noah.
  10 And it came to pass after seven days, that the waters of the flood were upon the earth.
  11 # In the six hundredth year of Noah’s life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.
  12 And the rain was upon the earth forty days and forty nights.
  13 In the selfsame day entered Noah, and Shem, and Ham, and Japheth, the sons of Noah, and Noah’s wife, and the three wives of his sons with them, into the ark;
  14 They, and every beast after his kind, and all the cattle after their kind, and every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind, and every fowl after his kind, every bird of every sort.
  15 And they went in unto Noah into the ark, two and two of all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life.
  16 And they that went in, went in male and female of all flesh, as God had commanded him: and the LORD shut him in.
  17 And the flood was forty days upon the earth; and the waters increased, and bare up the ark, and it was lift up above the earth.
  18 And the waters prevailed, and were increased greatly upon the earth; and the ark went upon the face of the waters.
  19 And the waters prevailed exceedingly upon the earth; and all the high hills, that [were] under the whole heaven, were covered.
  20 Fifteen cubits upward did the waters prevail; and the mountains were covered.
  21 And all flesh died that moved upon the earth, both of fowl, and of cattle, and of beast, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth, and every man:
  22 All in whose nostrils [was] the breath of life, of all that [was] in the dry [land], died.
  23 And every living substance was destroyed which was upon the face of the ground, both man, and cattle, and the creeping things, and the fowl of the heaven; and they were destroyed from the earth: and Noah only remained [alive], and they that [were] with him in the ark.
  24 And the waters prevailed upon the earth an hundred and fifty days.
  
  CHAPTER 8
  1 And God remembered Noah, and every living thing, and all the cattle that [was] with him in the ark: and God made a wind to pass over the earth, and the waters asswaged;
  2 The fountains also of the deep and the windows of heaven were stopped, and the rain from heaven was restrained;
  3 And the waters returned from off the earth continually: and after the end of the hundred and fifty days the waters were abated.
  4 And the ark rested in the seventh month, on the seventeenth day of the month, upon the mountains of Ararat.
  5 And the waters decreased continually until the tenth month: in the tenth [month], on the first [day] of the month, were the tops of the mountains seen.
  6 # And it came to pass at the end of forty days, that Noah opened the window of the ark which he had made:
  7 And he sent forth a raven, which went forth to and fro, until the waters were dried up from off the earth.
  8 Also he sent forth a dove from him, to see if the waters were abated from off the face of the ground;
  9 But the dove found no rest for the sole of her foot, and she returned unto him into the ark, for the waters [were] on the face of the whole earth: then he put forth his hand, and took her, and pulled her in unto him into the ark.
  10 And he stayed yet other seven days; and again he sent forth the dove out of the ark;
  11 And the dove came in to him in the evening; and, lo, in her mouth [was] an olive leaf pluckt off: so Noah knew that the waters were abated from off the earth.
  12 And he stayed yet other seven days; and sent forth the dove; which returned not again unto him any more.
  13 # And it came to pass in the six hundredth and first year, in the first [month], the first [day] of the month, the waters were dried up from off the earth: and Noah removed the covering of the ark, and looked, and, behold, the face of the ground was dry.
  14 And in the second month, on the seven and twentieth day of the month, was the earth dried.
  15 # And God spake unto Noah, saying,
  16 Go forth of the ark, thou, and thy wife, and thy sons, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
  17 Bring forth with thee every living thing that [is] with thee, of all flesh, [both] of fowl, and of cattle, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth; that they may breed abundantly in the earth, and be fruitful, and multiply upon the earth.
  18 And Noah went forth, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him:
  19 Every beast, every creeping thing, and every fowl, [and] whatsoever creepeth upon the earth, after their kinds, went forth out of the ark.
  20 # And Noah builded an altar unto the LORD; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar.
  21 And the LORD smelled a sweet savour; and the LORD said in his heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man’s sake; for the imagination of man’s heart [is] evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done.
  22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.
  
  CHAPTER 9
  1 And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.
  2 And the fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth, and upon every fowl of the air, upon all that moveth [upon] the earth, and upon all the fishes of the sea; into your hand are they delivered.
  3 Every moving thing that liveth shall be meat for you; even as the green herb have I given you all things.
  4 But flesh with the life thereof, [which is] the blood thereof, shall ye not eat.
  5 And surely your blood of your lives will I require; at the hand of every beast will I require it, and at the hand of man; at the hand of every man’s brother will I require the life of man.
  6 Whoso sheddeth man’s blood, by man shall his blood be shed: for in the image of God made he man.
  7 And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.
  8 # And God spake unto Noah, and to his sons with him, saying,
  9 And I, behold, I establish my covenant with you, and with your seed after you;
  10 And with every living creature that [is] with you, of the fowl, of the cattle, and of every beast of the earth with you; from all that go out of the ark, to every beast of the earth.
  11 And I will establish my covenant with you; neither shall all flesh be cut off any more by the waters of a flood; neither shall there any more be a flood to destroy the earth.
  12 And God said, This [is] the token of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that [is] with you, for perpetual generations:
  13 I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth.
  14 And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud:
  15 And I will remember my covenant, which [is] between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh.
  16 And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
  17 And God said unto Noah, This [is] the token of the covenant, which I have established between me and all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
  18 # And the sons of Noah, that went forth of the ark, were Shem, and Ham, and Japheth: and Ham [is] the father of Canaan.
  19 These [are] the three sons of Noah: and of them was the whole earth overspread.
  20 And Noah began [to be] an husbandman, and he planted a vineyard:
  21 And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.
  22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.
  23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid [it] upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces [were] backward, and they saw not their father’s nakedness.
  24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.
  25 And he said, Cursed [be] Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren.
  26 And he said, Blessed [be] the LORD God of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
  27 God shall enlarge Japheth, and he shall dwell in the tents of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
  28 # And Noah lived after the flood three hundred and fifty years.
  29 And all the days of Noah were nine hundred and fifty years: and he died.
  
  CHAPTER 10
  1 Now these [are] the generations of the sons of Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth: and unto them were sons born after the flood.
  2 The sons of Japheth; Gomer, and Magog, and Madai, and Javan, and Tubal, and Meshech, and Tiras.
  3 And the sons of Gomer; Ashkenaz, and Riphath, and Togarmah.
  4 And the sons of Javan; Elishah, and Tarshish, Kittim, and Dodanim.
  5 By these were the isles of the Gentiles divided in their lands; every one after his tongue, after their families, in their nations.
  6 # And the sons of Ham; Cush, and Mizraim, and Phut, and Canaan.
  7 And the sons of Cush; Seba, and Havilah, and Sabtah, and Raamah, and Sabtecha: and the sons of Raamah; Sheba, and Dedan.
  8 And Cush begat Nimrod: he began to be a mighty one in the earth.
  9 He was a mighty hunter before the LORD: wherefore it is said, Even as Nimrod the mighty hunter before the LORD.
  10 And the beginning of his kingdom was Babel, and Erech, and Accad, and Calneh, in the land of Shinar.
  11 Out of that land went forth Asshur, and builded Nineveh, and the city Rehoboth, and Calah,
  12 And Resen between Nineveh and Calah: the same [is] a great city.
  13 And Mizraim begat Ludim, and Anamim, and Lehabim, and Naphtuhim,
  14 And Pathrusim, and Casluhim, (out of whom came Philistim,) and Caphtorim.
  15 # And Canaan begat Sidon his firstborn, and Heth,
  16 And the Jebusite, and the Amorite, and the Girgasite,
  17 And the Hivite, and the Arkite, and the Sinite,
  18 And the Arvadite, and the Zemarite, and the Hamathite: and afterward were the families of the Canaanites spread abroad.
  19 And the border of the Canaanites was from Sidon, as thou comest to Gerar, unto Gaza; as thou goest, unto Sodom, and Gomorrah, and Admah, and Zeboim, even unto Lasha.
  20 These [are] the sons of Ham, after their families, after their tongues, in their countries, [and] in their nations.
  21 # Unto Shem also, the father of all the children of Eber, the brother of Japheth the elder, even to him were [children] born.
  22 The children of Shem; Elam, and Asshur, and Arphaxad, and Lud, and Aram.
  23 And the children of Aram; Uz, and Hul, and Gether, and Mash.
  24 And Arphaxad begat Salah; and Salah begat Eber.
  25 And unto Eber were born two sons: the name of one [was] Peleg; for in his days was the earth divided; and his brother’s name [was] Joktan.
  26 And Joktan begat Almodad, and Sheleph, and Hazarmaveth, and Jerah,
  27 And Hadoram, and Uzal, and Diklah,
  28 And Obal, and Abimael, and Sheba,
  29 And Ophir, and Havilah, and Jobab: all these [were] the sons of Joktan.
  30 And their dwelling was from Mesha, as thou goest unto Sephar a mount of the east.
  31 These [are] the sons of Shem, after their families, after their tongues, in their lands, after their nations.
  32 These [are] the families of the sons of Noah, after their generations, in their nations: and by these were the nations divided in the earth after the flood.
  
  CHAPTER 11
  1 And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech.
  2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there.
  3 And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them throughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for morter.
  4 And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top [may reach] unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.
  5 And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded.
  6 And the LORD said, Behold, the people [is] one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do.
  7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.
  8 So the LORD scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.
  9 Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the LORD did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the LORD scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth.
  10 # These [are] the generations of Shem: Shem [was] an hundred years old, and begat Arphaxad two years after the flood:
  11 And Shem lived after he begat Arphaxad five hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
  12 And Arphaxad lived five and thirty years, and begat Salah:
  13 And Arphaxad lived after he begat Salah four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
  14 And Salah lived thirty years, and begat Eber:
  15 And Salah lived after he begat Eber four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
  16 And Eber lived four and thirty years, and begat Peleg:
  17 And Eber lived after he begat Peleg four hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters.
  18 And Peleg lived thirty years, and begat Reu:
  19 And Peleg lived after he begat Reu two hundred and nine years, and begat sons and daughters.
  20 And Reu lived two and thirty years, and begat Serug:
  21 And Reu lived after he begat Serug two hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters.
  22 And Serug lived thirty years, and begat Nahor:
  23 And Serug lived after he begat Nahor two hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
  24 And Nahor lived nine and twenty years, and begat Terah:
  25 And Nahor lived after he begat Terah an hundred and nineteen years, and begat sons and daughters.
  26 And Terah lived seventy years, and begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran.
  27 # Now these [are] the generations of Terah: Terah begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran; and Haran begat Lot.
  28 And Haran died before his father Terah in the land of his nativity, in Ur of the Chaldees.
  29 And Abram and Nahor took them wives: the name of Abram’s wife [was] Sarai; and the name of Nahor’s wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran, the father of Milcah, and the father of Iscah.
  30 But Sarai was barren; she [had] no child.
  31 And Terah took Abram his son, and Lot the son of Haran his son’s son, and Sarai his daughter in law, his son Abram’s wife; and they went forth with them from Ur of the Chaldees, to go into the land of Canaan; and they came unto Haran, and dwelt there.
  32 And the days of Terah were two hundred and five years: and Terah died in Haran.
  
  CHAPTER 12
  1 Now the LORD had said unto Abram, Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father’s house, unto a land that I will shew thee:
  2 And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing:
  3 And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed.
  4 So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram [was] seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran.
  5 And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother’s son, and all their substance that they had gathered, and the souls that they had gotten in Haran; and they went forth to go into the land of Canaan; and into the land of Canaan they came.
  6 # And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite [was] then in the land.
  7 And the LORD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the LORD, who appeared unto him.
  8 And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Beth-el, and pitched his tent, [having] Beth-el on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD.
  9 And Abram journeyed, going on still toward the south.
  10 # And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine [was] grievous in the land.
  11 And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou [art] a fair woman to look upon:
  12 Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This [is] his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive.
  13 Say, I pray thee, thou [art] my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
  14 # And it came to pass, that, when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she [was] very fair.
  15 The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into Pharaoh’s house.
  16 And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels.
  17 And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram’s wife.
  18 And Pharaoh called Abram, and said, What [is] this [that] thou hast done unto me? why didst thou not tell me that she [was] thy wife?
  19 Why saidst thou, She [is] my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take [her], and go thy way.
  20 And Pharaoh commanded [his] men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.
  
  CHAPTER 13
  1 And Abram went up out of Egypt, he, and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the south.
  2 And Abram [was] very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold.
  3 And he went on his journeys from the south even to Beth-el, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Beth-el and Hai;
  4 Unto the place of the altar, which he had made there at the first: and there Abram called on the name of the LORD.
  5 # And Lot also, which went with Abram, had flocks, and herds, and tents.
  6 And the land was not able to bear them, that they might dwell together: for their substance was great, so that they could not dwell together.
  7 And there was a strife between the herdmen of Abram’s cattle and the herdmen of Lot’s cattle: and the Canaanite and the Perizzite dwelled then in the land.
  8 And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we [be] brethren.
  9 [Is] not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: if [thou wilt take] the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if [thou depart] to the right hand, then I will go to the left.
  10 And Lot lifted up his eyes, and beheld all the plain of Jordan, that it [was] well watered every where, before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, [even] as the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt, as thou comest unto Zoar.
  11 Then Lot chose him all the plain of Jordan; and Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other.
  12 Abram dwelled in the land of Canaan, and Lot dwelled in the cities of the plain, and pitched [his] tent toward Sodom.
  13 But the men of Sodom [were] wicked and sinners before the LORD exceedingly.
  14 # And the LORD said unto Abram, after that Lot was separated from him, Lift up now thine eyes, and look from the place where thou art northward, and southward, and eastward, and westward:
  15 For all the land which thou seest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed for ever.
  16 And I will make thy seed as the dust of the earth: so that if a man can number the dust of the earth, [then] shall thy seed also be numbered.
  17 Arise, walk through the land in the length of it and in the breadth of it; for I will give it unto thee.
  18 Then Abram removed [his] tent, and came and dwelt in the plain of Mamre, which [is] in Hebron, and built there an altar unto the LORD.
  
  CHAPTER 14
  1 And it came to pass in the days of Amraphel king of Shinar, Arioch king of Ellasar, Chedorlaomer king of Elam, and Tidal king of nations;
  2 [That these] made war with Bera king of Sodom, and with Birsha king of Gomorrah, Shinab king of Admah, and Shemeber king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela, which is Zoar.
  3 All these were joined together in the vale of Siddim, which is the salt sea.
  4 Twelve years they served Chedorlaomer, and in the thirteenth year they rebelled.
  5 And in the fourteenth year came Chedorlaomer, and the kings that [were] with him, and smote the Rephaims in Ashteroth Karnaim, and the Zuzims in Ham, and the Emims in Shaveh Kiriathaim,
  6 And the Horites in their mount Seir, unto El-paran, which [is] by the wilderness.
  7 And they returned, and came to En-mishpat, which [is] Kadesh, and smote all the country of the Amalekites, and also the Amorites, that dwelt in Hazezon-tamar.
  8 And there went out the king of Sodom, and the king of Gomorrah, and the king of Admah, and the king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela (the same [is] Zoar;) and they joined battle with them in the vale of Siddim;
  9 With Chedorlaomer the king of Elam, and with Tidal king of nations, and Amraphel king of Shinar, and Arioch king of Ellasar; four kings with five.
  10 And the vale of Siddim [was full of] slimepits; and the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah fled, and fell there; and they that remained fled to the mountain.
  11 And they took all the goods of Sodom and Gomorrah, and all their victuals, and went their way.
  12 And they took Lot, Abram’s brother’s son, who dwelt in Sodom, and his goods, and departed.
  13 And there came one that had escaped, and told Abram the Hebrew; for he dwelt in the plain of Mamre the Amorite, brother of Eshcol, and brother of Aner: and these [were] confederate with Abram.
  14 And when Abram heard that his brother was taken captive, he armed his trained [servants], born in his own house, three hundred and eighteen, and pursued [them] unto Dan.
  15 And he divided himself against them, he and his servants, by night, and smote them, and pursued them unto Hobah, which [is] on the left hand of Damascus.
  16 And he brought back all the goods, and also brought again his brother Lot, and his goods, and the women also, and the people.
  17 # And the king of Sodom went out to meet him after his return from the slaughter of Chedorlaomer, and of the kings that [were] with him, at the valley of Shaveh, which [is] the king’s dale.
  18 And Melchizedek king of Salem brought forth bread and wine: and he [was] the priest of the most high God.
  19 And he blessed him, and said, Blessed [be] Abram of the most high God, possessor of heaven and earth:
  20 And blessed be the most high God, which hath delivered thine enemies into thy hand. And he gave him tithes of all.
  21 And the king of Sodom said unto Abram, Give me the persons, and take the goods to thyself.
  22 And Abram said to the king of Sodom, I have lift up mine hand unto the LORD, the most high God, the possessor of heaven and earth,
  23 That I will not [take] from a thread even to a shoelatchet, and that I will not take any thing that [is] thine, lest thou shouldest say, I have made Abram rich:
  24 Save only that which the young men have eaten, and the portion of the men which went with me, Aner, Eshcol, and Mamre; let them take their portion.
  
  CHAPTER 15
  1 After these things the word of the LORD came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I [am] thy shield, [and] thy exceeding great reward.
  2 And Abram said, Lord GOD, what wilt thou give me, seeing I go childless, and the steward of my house [is] this Eliezer of Damascus?
  3 And Abram said, Behold, to me thou hast given no seed: and, lo, one born in my house is mine heir.
  4 And, behold, the word of the LORD [came] unto him, saying, This shall not be thine heir; but he that shall come forth out of thine own bowels shall be thine heir.
  5 And he brought him forth abroad, and said, Look now toward heaven, and tell the stars, if thou be able to number them: and he said unto him, So shall thy seed be.
  6 And he believed in the LORD; and he counted it to him for righteousness.
  7 And he said unto him, I [am] the LORD that brought thee out of Ur of the Chaldees, to give thee this land to inherit it.
  8 And he said, Lord GOD, whereby shall I know that I shall inherit it?
  9 And he said unto him, Take me an heifer of three years old, and a she goat of three years old, and a ram of three years old, and a turtledove, and a young pigeon.
  10 And he took unto him all these, and divided them in the midst, and laid each piece one against another: but the birds divided he not.
  11 And when the fowls came down upon the carcases, Abram drove them away.
  12 And when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and, lo, an horror of great darkness fell upon him.
  13 And he said unto Abram, Know of a surety that thy seed shall be a stranger in a land [that is] not their’s, and shall serve them; and they shall afflict them four hundred years;
  14 And also that nation, whom they shall serve, will I judge: and afterward shall they come out with great substance.
  15 And thou shalt go to thy fathers in peace; thou shalt be buried in a good old age.
  16 But in the fourth generation they shall come hither again: for the iniquity of the Amorites [is] not yet full.
  17 And it came to pass, that, when the sun went down, and it was dark, behold a smoking furnace, and a burning lamp that passed between those pieces.
  18 In the same day the LORD made a covenant with Abram, saying, Unto thy seed have I given this land, from the river of Egypt unto the great river, the river Euphrates:
  19 The Kenites, and the Kenizzites, and the Kadmonites,
  20 And the Hittites, and the Perizzites, and the Rephaims,
  21 And the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Girgashites, and the Jebusites.
  
  CHAPTER 16
  1 Now Sarai Abram’s wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name [was] Hagar.
  2 And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai.
  3 And Sarai Abram’s wife took Hagar her maid the Egyptian, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan, and gave her to her husband Abram to be his wife.
  4 # And he went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes.
  5 And Sarai said unto Abram, My wrong [be] upon thee: I have given my maid into thy bosom; and when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes: the LORD judge between me and thee.
  6 But Abram said unto Sarai, Behold, thy maid [is] in thy hand; do to her as it pleaseth thee. And when Sarai dealt hardly with her, she fled from her face.
  7 # And the angel of the LORD found her by a fountain of water in the wilderness, by the fountain in the way to Shur.
  8 And he said, Hagar, Sarai’s maid, whence camest thou? and whither wilt thou go? And she said, I flee from the face of my mistress Sarai.
  9 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Return to thy mistress, and submit thyself under her hands.
  10 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, I will multiply thy seed exceedingly, that it shall not be numbered for multitude.
  11 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Behold, thou [art] with child, and shalt bear a son, and shalt call his name Ishmael; because the LORD hath heard thy affliction.
  12 And he will be a wild man; his hand [will be] against every man, and every man’s hand against him; and he shall dwell in the presence of all his brethren.
  13 And she called the name of the LORD that spake unto her, Thou God seest me: for she said, Have I also here looked after him that seeth me?
  14 Wherefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi; behold, [it is] between Kadesh and Bered.
  15 # And Hagar bare Abram a son: and Abram called his son’s name, which Hagar bare, Ishmael.
  16 And Abram [was] fourscore and six years old, when Hagar bare Ishmael to Abram.
  
  CHAPTER 17
  1 And when Abram was ninety years old and nine, the LORD appeared to Abram, and said unto him, I [am] the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect.
  2 And I will make my covenant between me and thee, and will multiply thee exceedingly.
  3 And Abram fell on his face: and God talked with him, saying,
  4 As for me, behold, my covenant [is] with thee, and thou shalt be a father of many nations.
  5 Neither shall thy name any more be called Abram, but thy name shall be Abraham; for a father of many nations have I made thee.
  6 And I will make thee exceeding fruitful, and I will make nations of thee, and kings shall come out of thee.
  7 And I will establish my covenant between me and thee and thy seed after thee in their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be a God unto thee, and to thy seed after thee.
  8 And I will give unto thee, and to thy seed after thee, the land wherein thou art a stranger, all the land of Canaan, for an everlasting possession; and I will be their God.
  9 # And God said unto Abraham, Thou shalt keep my covenant therefore, thou, and thy seed after thee in their generations.
  10 This [is] my covenant, which ye shall keep, between me and you and thy seed after thee; Every man child among you shall be circumcised.
  11 And ye shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskin; and it shall be a token of the covenant betwixt me and you.
  12 And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every man child in your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any stranger, which [is] not of thy seed.
  13 He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised: and my covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant.
  14 And the uncircumcised man child whose flesh of his foreskin is not circumcised, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken my covenant.
  15 # And God said unto Abraham, As for Sarai thy wife, thou shalt not call her name Sarai, but Sarah [shall] her name [be].
  16 And I will bless her, and give thee a son also of her: yea, I will bless her, and she shall be [a mother] of nations; kings of people shall be of her.
  17 Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall [a child] be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?
  18 And Abraham said unto God, O that Ishmael might live before thee!
  19 And God said, Sarah thy wife shall bear thee a son indeed; and thou shalt call his name Isaac: and I will establish my covenant with him for an everlasting covenant, [and] with his seed after him.
  20 And as for Ishmael, I have heard thee: Behold, I have blessed him, and will make him fruitful, and will multiply him exceedingly; twelve princes shall he beget, and I will make him a great nation.
  21 But my covenant will I establish with Isaac, which Sarah shall bear unto thee at this set time in the next year.
  22 And he left off talking with him, and God went up from Abraham.
  23 # And Abraham took Ishmael his son, and all that were born in his house, and all that were bought with his money, every male among the men of Abraham’s house; and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin in the selfsame day, as God had said unto him.
  24 And Abraham [was] ninety years old and nine, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
  25 And Ishmael his son [was] thirteen years old, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
  26 In the selfsame day was Abraham circumcised, and Ishmael his son.
  27 And all the men of his house, born in the house, and bought with money of the stranger, were circumcised with him.
  
  CHAPTER 18
  1 And the LORD appeared unto him in the plains of Mamre: and he sat in the tent door in the heat of the day;
  2 And he lift up his eyes and looked, and, lo, three men stood by him: and when he saw [them], he ran to meet them from the tent door, and bowed himself toward the ground,
  3 And said, My Lord, if now I have found favour in thy sight, pass not away, I pray thee, from thy servant:
  4 Let a little water, I pray you, be fetched, and wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree:
  5 And I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort ye your hearts; after that ye shall pass on: for therefore are ye come to your servant. And they said, So do, as thou hast said.
  6 And Abraham hastened into the tent unto Sarah, and said, Make ready quickly three measures of fine meal, knead [it], and make cakes upon the hearth.
  7 And Abraham ran unto the herd, and fetcht a calf tender and good, and gave [it] unto a young man; and he hasted to dress it.
  8 And he took butter, and milk, and the calf which he had dressed, and set [it] before them; and he stood by them under the tree, and they did eat.
  9 # And they said unto him, Where [is] Sarah thy wife? And he said, Behold, in the tent.
  10 And he said, I will certainly return unto thee according to the time of life; and, lo, Sarah thy wife shall have a son. And Sarah heard [it] in the tent door, which [was] behind him.
  11 Now Abraham and Sarah [were] old [and] well stricken in age; [and] it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.
  12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?
  13 And the LORD said unto Abraham, Wherefore did Sarah laugh, saying, Shall I of a surety bear a child, which am old?
  14 Is any thing too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.
  15 Then Sarah denied, saying, I laughed not; for she was afraid. And he said, Nay; but thou didst laugh.
  16 # And the men rose up from thence, and looked toward Sodom: and Abraham went with them to bring them on the way.
  17 And the LORD said, Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do;
  18 Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him?
  19 For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.
  20 And the LORD said, Because the cry of Sodom and Gomorrah is great, and because their sin is very grievous;
  21 I will go down now, and see whether they have done altogether according to the cry of it, which is come unto me; and if not, I will know.
  22 And the men turned their faces from thence, and went toward Sodom: but Abraham stood yet before the LORD.
  23 # And Abraham drew near, and said, Wilt thou also destroy the righteous with the wicked?
  24 Peradventure there be fifty righteous within the city: wilt thou also destroy and not spare the place for the fifty righteous that [are] therein?
  25 That be far from thee to do after this manner, to slay the righteous with the wicked: and that the righteous should be as the wicked, that be far from thee: Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?
  26 And the LORD said, If I find in Sodom fifty righteous within the city, then I will spare all the place for their sakes.
  27 And Abraham answered and said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord, which [am but] dust and ashes:
  28 Peradventure there shall lack five of the fifty righteous: wilt thou destroy all the city for [lack of] five? And he said, If I find there forty and five, I will not destroy [it].
  29 And he spake unto him yet again, and said, Peradventure there shall be forty found there. And he said, I will not do [it] for forty’s sake.
  30 And he said [unto him], Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak: Peradventure there shall thirty be found there. And he said, I will not do [it], if I find thirty there.
  31 And he said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord: Peradventure there shall be twenty found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for twenty’s sake.
  32 And he said, Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak yet but this once: Peradventure ten shall be found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for ten’s sake.
  33 And the LORD went his way, as soon as he had left communing with Abraham: and Abraham returned unto his place.
  
  CHAPTER 19
  1 And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing [them] rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face toward the ground;
  2 And he said, Behold now, my lords, turn in, I pray you, into your servant’s house, and tarry all night, and wash your feet, and ye shall rise up early, and go on your ways. And they said, Nay; but we will abide in the street all night.
  3 And he pressed upon them greatly; and they turned in unto him, and entered into his house; and he made them a feast, and did bake unleavened bread, and they did eat.
  4 # But before they lay down, the men of the city, [even] the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:
  5 And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where [are] the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.
  6 And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him,
  7 And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly.
  8 Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as [is] good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.
  9 And they said, Stand back. And they said [again], This one [fellow] came in to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them. And they pressed sore upon the man, [even] Lot, and came near to break the door.
  10 But the men put forth their hand, and pulled Lot into the house to them, and shut to the door.
  11 And they smote the men that [were] at the door of the house with blindness, both small and great: so that they wearied themselves to find the door.
  12 # And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring [them] out of this place:
  13 For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the LORD; and the LORD hath sent us to destroy it.
  14 And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the LORD will destroy this city. But he seemed as one that mocked unto his sons in law.
  15 # And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city.
  16 And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife, a
  
  Log in to Reply
- Bill Doltree says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:36 pm
  
  ch hath so bound and firmly knit the hearts of all Your Majesty’s loyal and religious people unto You, that Your very name is precious among them: their eye doth behold You with comfort, and they bless You in their hearts, as that sanctified Person, who, under God, is the immediate Author of their true happiness. And this their contentment doth not diminish or decay, but every day increaseth and taketh strength, when they observe, that the zeal of Your Majesty toward the house of God doth not slack or go backward, but is more and more kindled, manifesting itself abroad in the farthest parts of [Christendom], by writing in defence of the Truth, (which hath given such a blow unto that man of Sin, as will not be healed,) and every day at home, by religious and learned discourse, by frequenting the house of God, by hearing the Word preached, by cherishing the Teachers thereof, by caring for the Church, as a most tender and loving nursing Father.
  
  There are infinite arguments of this right Christian and religious affection in Your Majesty; but none is more forcible to declare it to others than the vehement and perpetuated desire of accomplishing and publishing of this work, which now with all humility we present unto Your Majesty. For when Your Highness had once out of deep judgment apprehended how convenient it was, that out of the Original Sacred Tongues, together with comparing of the labours, both in our own, and other foreign Languages, of many worthy men who went before us, there should be one more exact Translation of the holy Scriptures into the [English Tongue]; Your Majesty did never desist to urge and to excite those to whom it was commended, that the work might be hastened, and that the business might be expedited in so decent a manner, as a matter of such importance might justly require.
  
  And now at last, by the mercy of God, and the continuance of our labours, it being brought unto such a conclusion, as that we have great hopes that the Church of [England] shall reap good fruit thereby; we hold it our duty to offer it to Your Majesty, not only as to our King and Sovereign, but as to the principal Mover and Author of the work: humbly craving of Your most Sacred Majesty, that since things of this quality have ever been subject to the censures of illmeaning and discontented persons, it may receive approbation and patronage from so learned and judicious a Prince as Your Highness is, whose allowance and acceptance of our labours shall more honour and encourage us, than all the calumniations and hard interpretations of other men shall dismay us. So that if, on the one side, we shall be traduced by Popish Persons at home or abroad, who therefore will malign us, because we are poor instruments to make God’s holy Truth to be yet more and more known unto the people, whom they desire still to keep in ignorance and darkness; or if, on the other side, we shall be maligned by selfconceited Brethren, who run their own ways, and give liking unto nothing, but what is framed by themselves, and hammered on their anvil; we may rest secure, supported within by the truth and innocency of a good conscience, having walked the ways of simplicity and integrity, as before the Lord; and sustained without by the powerful protection of Your Majesty’s grace and favour, which will ever give countenance to honest and Christian endeavors against bitter censures and uncharitable imputations.
  
  The Lord of heaven and earth bless Your Majesty with many and happy days, that, as his heavenly hand hath enriched Your Highness with many singular and extraordinary graces, so You may be the wonder of the world in this latter age for happiness and true felicity, to the honour of that great GOD, and the good of his Church, through Jesus Christ our Lord and only Saviour.
  
  THE NAMES AND ORDER OF THE BOOKS OF THE HOLY BIBLE WITH THE NUMBER OF THEIR CHAPTERS
  
  THE BOOKS OF THE OLD TESTAMENT
  
  Genesis 50
  Exodus 40
  Leviticus 27
  Numbers 36
  Deuteronomy 34
  Joshua 24
  Judges 21
  Ruth 4
  1 Samuel 31
  2 Samuel 24
  1 Kings 22
  2 Kings 25
  1 Chronicles 29
  2 Chronicles 36
  Ezra 10
  Nehemiah 13
  Esther 10
  Job 42
  Psalms 150
  Proverbs 31
  Ecclesiastes 8
  Song of Songs 12
  Isaiah 66
  Jeremiah 52
  Lamentations 5
  Ezekiel 48
  Daniel 12
  Hosea 14
  Joel 3
  Amos 9
  Obadiah 1
  Jonah 4
  Micah 7
  Nahum 3
  Habakkuk 3
  Zephaniah 3
  Haggai 2
  Zechariah 14
  Malachi 4
  
  THE BOOKS OF THE NEW TESTAMENT
  
  Matthew 28
  Mark 16
  Luke 24
  John 21
  Acts 28
  Romans 16
  1 Corinthians 16
  2 Corinthians 13
  Galatians 6
  Ephesians 6
  Philippians 4
  Colossians 4
  1 Thessalonians 5
  2 Thessalonians 3
  1 Timothy 6
  2 Timothy 4
  Titus 3
  Philemon 1
  Hebrews 13
  James 5
  1 Peter 5
  2 Peter 3
  1 John 5
  2 John 1
  3 John 1
  Jude 1
  Revelation 22
  
  THE FIRST BOOK OF MOSES, CALLED GENESIS
  
  CHAPTER 1
  1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
  2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness [was] upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
  3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
  4 And God saw the light, that [it was] good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
  5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
  6 # And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
  7 And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which [were] under the firmament from the waters which [were] above the firmament: and it was so.
  8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
  9 # And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry [land] appear: and it was so.
  10 And God called the dry [land] Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that [it was] good.
  11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, [and] the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed [is] in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
  12 And the earth brought forth grass, [and] herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed [was] in itself, after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
  13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
  14 # And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:
  15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so.
  16 And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.
  17 And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,
  18 And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that [it was] good.
  19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
  20 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl [that] may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.
  21 And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
  22 And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.
  23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
  24 # And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.
  25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
  26 # And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
  27 So God created man in his [own] image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
  28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
  29 # And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which [is] upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which [is] the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.
  30 And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein [there is] life, [I have given] every green herb for meat: and it was so.
  31 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, [it was] very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.
  
  CHAPTER 2
  1 Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them.
  2 And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.
  3 And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.
  4 # These [are] the generations of the heavens and of the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens,
  5 And every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew: for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and [there was] not a man to till the ground.
  6 But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground.
  7 And the LORD God formed man [of] the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.
  8 # And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.
  9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
  10 And a river went out of Eden to water the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads.
  11 The name of the first [is] Pison: that [is] it which compasseth the whole land of Havilah, where [there is] gold;
  12 And the gold of that land [is] good: there [is] bdellium and the onyx stone.
  13 And the name of the second river [is] Gihon: the same [is] it that compasseth the whole land of Ethiopia.
  14 And the name of the third river [is] Hiddekel: that [is] it which goeth toward the east of Assyria. And the fourth river [is] Euphrates.
  15 And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.
  16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
  17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
  18 # And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
  19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought [them] unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that [was] the name thereof.
  20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
  21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
  22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
  23 And Adam said, This [is] now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
  24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
  25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
  
  CHAPTER 3
  1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
  2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:
  3 But of the fruit of the tree which [is] in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.
  4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
  5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.
  6 And when the woman saw that the tree [was] good for food, and that it [was] pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make [one] wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
  7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they [were] naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.
  8 And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.
  9 And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where [art] thou?
  10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I [was] naked; and I hid myself.
  11 And he said, Who told thee that thou [wast] naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?
  12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest [to be] with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.
  13 And the LORD God said unto the woman, What [is] this [that] thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.
  14 And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou [art] cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:
  15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
  16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire [shall be] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
  17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed [is] the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat [of] it all the days of thy life;
  18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;
  19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou [art], and unto dust shalt thou return.
  20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.
  21 Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of skins, and clothed them.
  22 # And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever:
  23 Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken.
  24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.
  
  CHAPTER 4
  1 And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.
  2 And she again bare his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground.
  3 And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD.
  4 And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering:
  5 But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.
  6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?
  7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee [shall be] his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.
  8 And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.
  9 # And the LORD said unto Cain, Where [is] Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: [Am] I my brother’s keeper?
  10 And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother’s blood crieth unto me from the ground.
  11 And now [art] thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother’s blood from thy hand;
  12 When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.
  13 And Cain said unto the LORD, My punishment [is] greater than I can bear.
  14 Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, [that] every one that findeth me shall slay me.
  15 And the LORD said unto him, Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And the LORD set a mark upon Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.
  16 # And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden.
  17 And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.
  18 And unto Enoch was born Irad: and Irad begat Mehujael: and Mehujael begat Methusael: and Methusael begat Lamech.
  19 # And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one [was] Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.
  20 And Adah bare Jabal: he was the father of such as dwell in tents, and [of such as have] cattle.
  21 And his brother’s name [was] Jubal: he was the father of all such as handle the harp and organ.
  22 And Zillah, she also bare Tubal-cain, an instructer of every artificer in brass and iron: and the sister of Tubal-cain [was] Naamah.
  23 And Lamech said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah, Hear my voice; ye wives of Lamech, hearken unto my speech: for I have slain a man to my wounding, and a young man to my hurt.
  24 If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy and sevenfold.
  25 # And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth: For God, [said she], hath appointed me another seed instead of Abel, whom Cain slew.
  26 And to Seth, to him also there was born a son; and he called his name Enos: then began men to call upon the name of the LORD.
  
  CHAPTER 5
  1 This [is] the book of the generations of Adam. In the day that God created man, in the likeness of God made he him;
  2 Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created.
  3 # And Adam lived an hundred and thirty years, and begat [a son] in his own likeness, after his image; and called his name Seth:
  4 And the days of Adam after he had begotten Seth were eight hundred years: and he begat sons and daughters:
  5 And all the days that Adam lived were nine hundred and thirty years: and he died.
  6 And Seth lived an hundred and five years, and begat Enos:
  7 And Seth lived after he begat Enos eight hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters:
  8 And all the days of Seth were nine hundred and twelve years: and he died.
  9 # And Enos lived ninety years, and begat Cainan:
  10 And Enos lived after he begat Cainan eight hundred and fifteen years, and begat sons and daughters:
  11 And all the days of Enos were nine hundred and five years: and he died.
  12 # And Cainan lived seventy years, and begat Mahalaleel:
  13 And Cainan lived after he begat Mahalaleel eight hundred and forty years, and begat sons and daughters:
  14 And all the days of Cainan were nine hundred and ten years: and he died.
  15 # And Mahalaleel lived sixty and five years, and begat Jared:
  16 And Mahalaleel lived after he begat Jared eight hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters:
  17 And all the days of Mahalaleel were eight hundred ninety and five years: and he died.
  18 # And Jared lived an hundred sixty and two years, and he begat Enoch:
  19 And Jared lived after he begat Enoch eight hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
  20 And all the days of Jared were nine hundred sixty and two years: and he died.
  21 # And Enoch lived sixty and five years, and begat Methuselah:
  22 And Enoch walked with God after he begat Methuselah three hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
  23 And all the days of Enoch were three hundred sixty and five years:
  24 And Enoch walked with God: and he [was] not; for God took him.
  25 And Methuselah lived an hundred eighty and seven years, and begat Lamech:
  26 And Methuselah lived after he begat Lamech seven hundred eighty and two years, and begat sons and daughters:
  27 And all the days of Methuselah were nine hundred sixty and nine years: and he died.
  28 # And Lamech lived an hundred eighty and two years, and begat a son:
  29 And he called his name Noah, saying, This [same] shall comfort us concerning our work and toil of our hands, because of the ground which the LORD hath cursed.
  30 And Lamech lived after he begat Noah five hundred ninety and five years, and begat sons and daughters:
  31 And all the days of Lamech were seven hundred seventy and seven years: and he died.
  32 And Noah was five hundred years old: and Noah begat Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
  
  CHAPTER 6
  1 And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them,
  2 That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they [were] fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose.
  3 And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also [is] flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.
  4 There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare [children] to them, the same [became] mighty men which [were] of old, men of renown.
  5 # And GOD saw that the wickedness of man [was] great in the earth, and [that] every imagination of the thoughts of his heart [was] only evil continually.
  6 And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart.
  7 And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them.
  8 But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD.
  9 # These [are] the generations of Noah: Noah was a just man [and] perfect in his generations, [and] Noah walked with God.
  10 And Noah begat three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
  11 The earth also was corrupt before God, and the earth was filled with violence.
  12 And God looked upon the earth, and, behold, it was corrupt; for all flesh had corrupted his way upon the earth.
  13 And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth.
  14 # Make thee an ark of gopher wood; rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch.
  15 And this [is the fashion] which thou shalt make it [of]: The length of the ark [shall be] three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.
  16 A window shalt thou make to the ark, and in a cubit shalt thou finish it above; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; [with] lower, second, and third [stories] shalt thou make it.
  17 And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life, from under heaven; [and] every thing that [is] in the earth shall die.
  18 But with thee will I establish my covenant; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
  19 And of every living thing of all flesh, two of every [sort] shalt thou bring into the ark, to keep [them] alive with thee; they shall be male and female.
  20 Of fowls after their kind, and of cattle after their kind, of every creeping thing of the earth after his kind, two of every [sort] shall come unto thee, to keep [them] alive.
  21 And take thou unto thee of all food that is eaten, and thou shalt gather [it] to thee; and it shall be for food for thee, and for them.
  22 Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he.
  
  CHAPTER 7
  1 And the LORD said unto Noah, Come thou and all thy house into the ark; for thee have I seen righteous before me in this generation.
  2 Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that [are] not clean by two, the male and his female.
  3 Of fowls also of the air by sevens, the male and the female; to keep seed alive upon the face of all the earth.
  4 For yet seven days, and I will cause it to rain upon the earth forty days and forty nights; and every living substance that I have made will I destroy from off the face of the earth.
  5 And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him.
  6 And Noah [was] six hundred years old when the flood of waters was upon the earth.
  7 # And Noah went in, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him, into the ark, because of the waters of the flood.
  8 Of clean beasts, and of beasts that [are] not clean, and of fowls, and of every thing that creepeth upon the earth,
  9 There went in two and two unto Noah into the ark, the male and the female, as God had commanded Noah.
  10 And it came to pass after seven days, that the waters of the flood were upon the earth.
  11 # In the six hundredth year of Noah’s life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.
  12 And the rain was upon the earth forty days and forty nights.
  13 In the selfsame day entered Noah, and Shem, and Ham, and Japheth, the sons of Noah, and Noah’s wife, and the three wives of his sons with them, into the ark;
  14 They, and every beast after his kind, and all the cattle after their kind, and every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind, and every fowl after his kind, every bird of every sort.
  15 And they went in unto Noah into the ark, two and two of all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life.
  16 And they that went in, went in male and female of all flesh, as God had commanded him: and the LORD shut him in.
  17 And the flood was forty days upon the earth; and the waters increased, and bare up the ark, and it was lift up above the earth.
  18 And the waters prevailed, and were increased greatly upon the earth; and the ark went upon the face of the waters.
  19 And the waters prevailed exceedingly upon the earth; and all the high hills, that [were] under the whole heaven, were covered.
  20 Fifteen cubits upward did the waters prevail; and the mountains were covered.
  21 And all flesh died that moved upon the earth, both of fowl, and of cattle, and of beast, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth, and every man:
  22 All in whose nostrils [was] the breath of life, of all that [was] in the dry [land], died.
  23 And every living substance was destroyed which was upon the face of the ground, both man, and cattle, and the creeping things, and the fowl of the heaven; and they were destroyed from the earth: and Noah only remained [alive], and they that [were] with him in the ark.
  24 And the waters prevailed upon the earth an hundred and fifty days.
  
  CHAPTER 8
  1 And God remembered Noah, and every living thing, and all the cattle that [was] with him in the ark: and God made a wind to pass over the earth, and the waters asswaged;
  2 The fountains also of the deep and the windows of heaven were stopped, and the rain from heaven was restrained;
  3 And the waters returned from off the earth continually: and after the end of the hundred and fifty days the waters were abated.
  4 And the ark rested in the seventh month, on the seventeenth day of the month, upon the mountains of Ararat.
  5 And the waters decreased continually until the tenth month: in the tenth [month], on the first [day] of the month, were the tops of the mountains seen.
  6 # And it came to pass at the end of forty days, that Noah opened the window of the ark which he had made:
  7 And he sent forth a raven, which went forth to and fro, until the waters were dried up from off the earth.
  8 Also he sent forth a dove from him, to see if the waters were abated from off the face of the ground;
  9 But the dove found no rest for the sole of her foot, and she returned unto him into the ark, for the waters [were] on the face of the whole earth: then he put forth his hand, and took her, and pulled her in unto him into the ark.
  10 And he stayed yet other seven days; and again he sent forth the dove out of the ark;
  11 And the dove came in to him in the evening; and, lo, in her mouth [was] an olive leaf pluckt off: so Noah knew that the waters were abated from off the earth.
  12 And he stayed yet other seven days; and sent forth the dove; which returned not again unto him any more.
  13 # And it came to pass in the six hundredth and first year, in the first [month], the first [day] of the month, the waters were dried up from off the earth: and Noah removed the covering of the ark, and looked, and, behold, the face of the ground was dry.
  14 And in the second month, on the seven and twentieth day of the month, was the earth dried.
  15 # And God spake unto Noah, saying,
  16 Go forth of the ark, thou, and thy wife, and thy sons, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
  17 Bring forth with thee every living thing that [is] with thee, of all flesh, [both] of fowl, and of cattle, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth; that they may breed abundantly in the earth, and be fruitful, and multiply upon the earth.
  18 And Noah went forth, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him:
  19 Every beast, every creeping thing, and every fowl, [and] whatsoever creepeth upon the earth, after their kinds, went forth out of the ark.
  20 # And Noah builded an altar unto the LORD; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar.
  21 And the LORD smelled a sweet savour; and the LORD said in his heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man’s sake; for the imagination of man’s heart [is] evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done.
  22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.
  
  CHAPTER 9
  1 And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.
  2 And the fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth, and upon every fowl of the air, upon all that moveth [upon] the earth, and upon all the fishes of the sea; into your hand are they delivered.
  3 Every moving thing that liveth shall be meat for you; even as the green herb have I given you all things.
  4 But flesh with the life thereof, [which is] the blood thereof, shall ye not eat.
  5 And surely your blood of your lives will I require; at the hand of every beast will I require it, and at the hand of man; at the hand of every man’s brother will I require the life of man.
  6 Whoso sheddeth man’s blood, by man shall his blood be shed: for in the image of God made he man.
  7 And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.
  8 # And God spake unto Noah, and to his sons with him, saying,
  9 And I, behold, I establish my covenant with you, and with your seed after you;
  10 And with every living creature that [is] with you, of the fowl, of the cattle, and of every beast of the earth with you; from all that go out of the ark, to every beast of the earth.
  11 And I will establish my covenant with you; neither shall all flesh be cut off any more by the waters of a flood; neither shall there any more be a flood to destroy the earth.
  12 And God said, This [is] the token of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that [is] with you, for perpetual generations:
  13 I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth.
  14 And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud:
  15 And I will remember my covenant, which [is] between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh.
  16 And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
  17 And God said unto Noah, This [is] the token of the covenant, which I have established between me and all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
  18 # And the sons of Noah, that went forth of the ark, were Shem, and Ham, and Japheth: and Ham [is] the father of Canaan.
  19 These [are] the three sons of Noah: and of them was the whole earth overspread.
  20 And Noah began [to be] an husbandman, and he planted a vineyard:
  21 And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.
  22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.
  23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid [it] upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces [were] backward, and they saw not their father’s nakedness.
  24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.
  25 And he said, Cursed [be] Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren.
  26 And he said, Blessed [be] the LORD God of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
  27 God shall enlarge Japheth, and he shall dwell in the tents of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
  28 # And Noah lived after the flood three hundred and fifty years.
  29 And all the days of Noah were nine hundred and fifty years: and he died.
  
  CHAPTER 10
  1 Now these [are] the generations of the sons of Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth: and unto them were sons born after the flood.
  2 The sons of Japheth; Gomer, and Magog, and Madai, and Javan, and Tubal, and Meshech, and Tiras.
  3 And the sons of Gomer; Ashkenaz, and Riphath, and Togarmah.
  4 And the sons of Javan; Elishah, and Tarshish, Kittim, and Dodanim.
  5 By these were the isles of the Gentiles divided in their lands; every one after his tongue, after their families, in their nations.
  6 # And the sons of Ham; Cush, and Mizraim, and Phut, and Canaan.
  7 And the sons of Cush; Seba, and Havilah, and Sabtah, and Raamah, and Sabtecha: and the sons of Raamah; Sheba, and Dedan.
  8 And Cush begat Nimrod: he began to be a mighty one in the earth.
  9 He was a mighty hunter before the LORD: wherefore it is said, Even as Nimrod the mighty hunter before the LORD.
  10 And the beginning of his kingdom was Babel, and Erech, and Accad, and Calneh, in the land of Shinar.
  11 Out of that land went forth Asshur, and builded Nineveh, and the city Rehoboth, and Calah,
  12 And Resen between Nineveh and Calah: the same [is] a great city.
  13 And Mizraim begat Ludim, and Anamim, and Lehabim, and Naphtuhim,
  14 And Pathrusim, and Casluhim, (out of whom came Philistim,) and Caphtorim.
  15 # And Canaan begat Sidon his firstborn, and Heth,
  16 And the Jebusite, and the Amorite, and the Girgasite,
  17 And the Hivite, and the Arkite, and the Sinite,
  18 And the Arvadite, and the Zemarite, and the Hamathite: and afterward were the families of the Canaanites spread abroad.
  19 And the border of the Canaanites was from Sidon, as thou comest to Gerar, unto Gaza; as thou goest, unto Sodom, and Gomorrah, and Admah, and Zeboim, even unto Lasha.
  20 These [are] the sons of Ham, after their families, after their tongues, in their countries, [and] in their nations.
  21 # Unto Shem also, the father of all the children of Eber, the brother of Japheth the elder, even to him were [children] born.
  22 The children of Shem; Elam, and Asshur, and Arphaxad, and Lud, and Aram.
  23 And the children of Aram; Uz, and Hul, and Gether, and Mash.
  24 And Arphaxad begat Salah; and Salah begat Eber.
  25 And unto Eber were born two sons: the name of one [was] Peleg; for in his days was the earth divided; and his brother’s name [was] Joktan.
  26 And Joktan begat Almodad, and Sheleph, and Hazarmaveth, and Jerah,
  27 And Hadoram, and Uzal, and Diklah,
  28 And Obal, and Abimael, and Sheba,
  29 And Ophir, and Havilah, and Jobab: all these [were] the sons of Joktan.
  30 And their dwelling was from Mesha, as thou goest unto Sephar a mount of the east.
  31 These [are] the sons of Shem, after their families, after their tongues, in their lands, after their nations.
  32 These [are] the families of the sons of Noah, after their generations, in their nations: and by these were the nations divided in the earth after the flood.
  
  CHAPTER 11
  1 And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech.
  2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there.
  3 And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them throughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for morter.
  4 And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top [may reach] unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.
  5 And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded.
  6 And the LORD said, Behold, the people [is] one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do.
  7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.
  8 So the LORD scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.
  9 Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the LORD did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the LORD scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth.
  10 # These [are] the generations of Shem: Shem [was] an hundred years old, and begat Arphaxad two years after the flood:
  11 And Shem lived after he begat Arphaxad five hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
  12 And Arphaxad lived five and thirty years, and begat Salah:
  13 And Arphaxad lived after he begat Salah four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
  14 And Salah lived thirty years, and begat Eber:
  15 And Salah lived after he begat Eber four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
  16 And Eber lived four and thirty years, and begat Peleg:
  17 And Eber lived after he begat Peleg four hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters.
  18 And Peleg lived thirty years, and begat Reu:
  19 And Peleg lived after he begat Reu two hundred and nine years, and begat sons and daughters.
  20 And Reu lived two and thirty years, and begat Serug:
  21 And Reu lived after he begat Serug two hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters.
  22 And Serug lived thirty years, and begat Nahor:
  23 And Serug lived after he begat Nahor two hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
  24 And Nahor lived nine and twenty years, and begat Terah:
  25 And Nahor lived after he begat Terah an hundred and nineteen years, and begat sons and daughters.
  26 And Terah lived seventy years, and begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran.
  27 # Now these [are] the generations of Terah: Terah begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran; and Haran begat Lot.
  28 And Haran died before his father Terah in the land of his nativity, in Ur of the Chaldees.
  29 And Abram and Nahor took them wives: the name of Abram’s wife [was] Sarai; and the name of Nahor’s wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran, the father of Milcah, and the father of Iscah.
  30 But Sarai was barren; she [had] no child.
  31 And Terah took Abram his son, and Lot the son of Haran his son’s son, and Sarai his daughter in law, his son Abram’s wife; and they went forth with them from Ur of the Chaldees, to go into the land of Canaan; and they came unto Haran, and dwelt there.
  32 And the days of Terah were two hundred and five years: and Terah died in Haran.
  
  CHAPTER 12
  1 Now the LORD had said unto Abram, Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father’s house, unto a land that I will shew thee:
  2 And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing:
  3 And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed.
  4 So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram [was] seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran.
  5 And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother’s son, and all their substance that they had gathered, and the souls that they had gotten in Haran; and they went forth to go into the land of Canaan; and into the land of Canaan they came.
  6 # And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite [was] then in the land.
  7 And the LORD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the LORD, who appeared unto him.
  8 And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Beth-el, and pitched his tent, [having] Beth-el on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD.
  9 And Abram journeyed, going on still toward the south.
  10 # And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine [was] grievous in the land.
  11 And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou [art] a fair woman to look upon:
  12 Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This [is] his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive.
  13 Say, I pray thee, thou [art] my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
  14 # And it came to pass, that, when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she [was] very fair.
  15 The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into Pharaoh’s house.
  16 And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels.
  17 And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram’s wife.
  18 And Pharaoh called Abram, and said, What [is] this [that] thou hast done unto me? why didst thou not tell me that she [was] thy wife?
  19 Why saidst thou, She [is] my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take [her], and go thy way.
  20 And Pharaoh commanded [his] men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.
  
  CHAPTER 13
  1 And Abram went up out of Egypt, he, and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the south.
  2 And Abram [was] very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold.
  3 And he went on his journeys from the south even to Beth-el, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Beth-el and Hai;
  4 Unto the place of the altar, which he had made there at the first: and there Abram called on the name of the LORD.
  5 # And Lot also, which went with Abram, had flocks, and herds, and tents.
  6 And the land was not able to bear them, that they might dwell together: for their substance was great, so that they could not dwell together.
  7 And there was a strife between the herdmen of Abram’s cattle and the herdmen of Lot’s cattle: and the Canaanite and the Perizzite dwelled then in the land.
  8 And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we [be] brethren.
  9 [Is] not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: if [thou wilt take] the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if [thou depart] to the right hand, then I will go to the left.
  10 And Lot lifted up his eyes, and beheld all the plain of Jordan, that it [was] well watered every where, before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, [even] as the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt, as thou comest unto Zoar.
  11 Then Lot chose him all the plain of Jordan; and Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other.
  12 Abram dwelled in the land of Canaan, and Lot dwelled in the cities of the plain, and pitched [his] tent toward Sodom.
  13 But the men of Sodom [were] wicked and sinners before the LORD exceedingly.
  14 # And the LORD said unto Abram, after that Lot was separated from him, Lift up now thine eyes, and look from the place where thou art northward, and southward, and eastward, and westward:
  15 For all the land which thou seest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed for ever.
  16 And I will make thy seed as the dust of the earth: so that if a man can number the dust of the earth, [then] shall thy seed also be numbered.
  17 Arise, walk through the land in the length of it and in the breadth of it; for I will give it unto thee.
  18 Then Abram removed [his] tent, and came and dwelt in the plain of Mamre, which [is] in Hebron, and built there an altar unto the LORD.
  
  CHAPTER 14
  1 And it came to pass in the days of Amraphel king of Shinar, Arioch king of Ellasar, Chedorlaomer king of Elam, and Tidal king of nations;
  2 [That these] made war with Bera king of Sodom, and with Birsha king of Gomorrah, Shinab king of Admah, and Shemeber king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela, which is Zoar.
  3 All these were joined together in the vale of Siddim, which is the salt sea.
  4 Twelve years they served Chedorlaomer, and in the thirteenth year they rebelled.
  5 And in the fourteenth year came Chedorlaomer, and the kings that [were] with him, and smote the Rephaims in Ashteroth Karnaim, and the Zuzims in Ham, and the Emims in Shaveh Kiriathaim,
  6 And the Horites in their mount Seir, unto El-paran, which [is] by the wilderness.
  7 And they returned, and came to En-mishpat, which [is] Kadesh, and smote all the country of the Amalekites, and also the Amorites, that dwelt in Hazezon-tamar.
  8 And there went out the king of Sodom, and the king of Gomorrah, and the king of Admah, and the king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela (the same [is] Zoar;) and they joined battle with them in the vale of Siddim;
  9 With Chedorlaomer the king of Elam, and with Tidal king of nations, and Amraphel king of Shinar, and Arioch king of Ellasar; four kings with five.
  10 And the vale of Siddim [was full of] slimepits; and the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah fled, and fell there; and they that remained fled to the mountain.
  11 And they took all the goods of Sodom and Gomorrah, and all their victuals, and went their way.
  12 And they took Lot, Abram’s brother’s son, who dwelt in Sodom, and his goods, and departed.
  13 And there came one that had escaped, and told Abram the Hebrew; for he dwelt in the plain of Mamre the Amorite, brother of Eshcol, and brother of Aner: and these [were] confederate with Abram.
  14 And when Abram heard that his brother was taken captive, he armed his trained [servants], born in his own house, three hundred and eighteen, and pursued [them] unto Dan.
  15 And he divided himself against them, he and his servants, by night, and smote them, and pursued them unto Hobah, which [is] on the left hand of Damascus.
  16 And he brought back all the goods, and also brought again his brother Lot, and his goods, and the women also, and the people.
  17 # And the king of Sodom went out to meet him after his return from the slaughter of Chedorlaomer, and of the kings that [were] with him, at the valley of Shaveh, which [is] the king’s dale.
  18 And Melchizedek king of Salem brought forth bread and wine: and he [was] the priest of the most high God.
  19 And he blessed him, and said, Blessed [be] Abram of the most high God, possessor of heaven and earth:
  20 And blessed be the most high God, which hath delivered thine enemies into thy hand. And he gave him tithes of all.
  21 And the king of Sodom said unto Abram, Give me the persons, and take the goods to thyself.
  22 And Abram said to the king of Sodom, I have lift up mine hand unto the LORD, the most high God, the possessor of heaven and earth,
  23 That I will not [take] from a thread even to a shoelatchet, and that I will not take any thing that [is] thine, lest thou shouldest say, I have made Abram rich:
  24 Save only that which the young men have eaten, and the portion of the men which went with me, Aner, Eshcol, and Mamre; let them take their portion.
  
  CHAPTER 15
  1 After these things the word of the LORD came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I [am] thy shield, [and] thy exceeding great reward.
  2 And Abram said, Lord GOD, what wilt thou give me, seeing I go childless, and the steward of my house [is] this Eliezer of Damascus?
  3 And Abram said, Behold, to me thou hast given no seed: and, lo, one born in my house is mine heir.
  4 And, behold, the word of the LORD [came] unto him, saying, This shall not be thine heir; but he that shall come forth out of thine own bowels shall be thine heir.
  5 And he brought him forth abroad, and said, Look now toward heaven, and tell the stars, if thou be able to number them: and he said unto him, So shall thy seed be.
  6 And he believed in the LORD; and he counted it to him for righteousness.
  7 And he said unto him, I [am] the LORD that brought thee out of Ur of the Chaldees, to give thee this land to inherit it.
  8 And he said, Lord GOD, whereby shall I know that I shall inherit it?
  9 And he said unto him, Take me an heifer of three years old, and a she goat of three years old, and a ram of three years old, and a turtledove, and a young pigeon.
  10 And he took unto him all these, and divided them in the midst, and laid each piece one against another: but the birds divided he not.
  11 And when the fowls came down upon the carcases, Abram drove them away.
  12 And when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and, lo, an horror of great darkness fell upon him.
  13 And he said unto Abram, Know of a surety that thy seed shall be a stranger in a land [that is] not their’s, and shall serve them; and they shall afflict them four hundred years;
  14 And also that nation, whom they shall serve, will I judge: and afterward shall they come out with great substance.
  15 And thou shalt go to thy fathers in peace; thou shalt be buried in a good old age.
  16 But in the fourth generation they shall come hither again: for the iniquity of the Amorites [is] not yet full.
  17 And it came to pass, that, when the sun went down, and it was dark, behold a smoking furnace, and a burning lamp that passed between those pieces.
  18 In the same day the LORD made a covenant with Abram, saying, Unto thy seed have I given this land, from the river of Egypt unto the great river, the river Euphrates:
  19 The Kenites, and the Kenizzites, and the Kadmonites,
  20 And the Hittites, and the Perizzites, and the Rephaims,
  21 And the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Girgashites, and the Jebusites.
  
  CHAPTER 16
  1 Now Sarai Abram’s wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name [was] Hagar.
  2 And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai.
  3 And Sarai Abram’s wife took Hagar her maid the Egyptian, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan, and gave her to her husband Abram to be his wife.
  4 # And he went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes.
  5 And Sarai said unto Abram, My wrong [be] upon thee: I have given my maid into thy bosom; and when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes: the LORD judge between me and thee.
  6 But Abram said unto Sarai, Behold, thy maid [is] in thy hand; do to her as it pleaseth thee. And when Sarai dealt hardly with her, she fled from her face.
  7 # And the angel of the LORD found her by a fountain of water in the wilderness, by the fountain in the way to Shur.
  8 And he said, Hagar, Sarai’s maid, whence camest thou? and whither wilt thou go? And she said, I flee from the face of my mistress Sarai.
  9 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Return to thy mistress, and submit thyself under her hands.
  10 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, I will multiply thy seed exceedingly, that it shall not be numbered for multitude.
  11 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Behold, thou [art] with child, and shalt bear a son, and shalt call his name Ishmael; because the LORD hath heard thy affliction.
  12 And he will be a wild man; his hand [will be] against every man, and every man’s hand against him; and he shall dwell in the presence of all his brethren.
  13 And she called the name of the LORD that spake unto her, Thou God seest me: for she said, Have I also here looked after him that seeth me?
  14 Wherefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi; behold, [it is] between Kadesh and Bered.
  15 # And Hagar bare Abram a son: and Abram called his son’s name, which Hagar bare, Ishmael.
  16 And Abram [was] fourscore and six years old, when Hagar bare Ishmael to Abram.
  
  CHAPTER 17
  1 And when Abram was ninety years old and nine, the LORD appeared to Abram, and said unto him, I [am] the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect.
  2 And I will make my covenant between me and thee, and will multiply thee exceedingly.
  3 And Abram fell on his face: and God talked with him, saying,
  4 As for me, behold, my covenant [is] with thee, and thou shalt be a father of many nations.
  5 Neither shall thy name any more be called Abram, but thy name shall be Abraham; for a father of many nations have I made thee.
  6 And I will make thee exceeding fruitful, and I will make nations of thee, and kings shall come out of thee.
  7 And I will establish my covenant between me and thee and thy seed after thee in their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be a God unto thee, and to thy seed after thee.
  8 And I will give unto thee, and to thy seed after thee, the land wherein thou art a stranger, all the land of Canaan, for an everlasting possession; and I will be their God.
  9 # And God said unto Abraham, Thou shalt keep my covenant therefore, thou, and thy seed after thee in their generations.
  10 This [is] my covenant, which ye shall keep, between me and you and thy seed after thee; Every man child among you shall be circumcised.
  11 And ye shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskin; and it shall be a token of the covenant betwixt me and you.
  12 And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every man child in your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any stranger, which [is] not of thy seed.
  13 He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised: and my covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant.
  14 And the uncircumcised man child whose flesh of his foreskin is not circumcised, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken my covenant.
  15 # And God said unto Abraham, As for Sarai thy wife, thou shalt not call her name Sarai, but Sarah [shall] her name [be].
  16 And I will bless her, and give thee a son also of her: yea, I will bless her, and she shall be [a mother] of nations; kings of people shall be of her.
  17 Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall [a child] be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?
  18 And Abraham said unto God, O that Ishmael might live before thee!
  19 And God said, Sarah thy wife shall bear thee a son indeed; and thou shalt call his name Isaac: and I will establish my covenant with him for an everlasting covenant, [and] with his seed after him.
  20 And as for Ishmael, I have heard thee: Behold, I have blessed him, and will make him fruitful, and will multiply him exceedingly; twelve princes shall he beget, and I will make him a great nation.
  21 But my covenant will I establish with Isaac, which Sarah shall bear unto thee at this set time in the next year.
  22 And he left off talking with him, and God went up from Abraham.
  23 # And Abraham took Ishmael his son, and all that were born in his house, and all that were bought with his money, every male among the men of Abraham’s house; and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin in the selfsame day, as God had said unto him.
  24 And Abraham [was] ninety years old and nine, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
  25 And Ishmael his son [was] thirteen years old, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
  26 In the selfsame day was Abraham circumcised, and Ishmael his son.
  27 And all the men of his house, born in the house, and bought with money of the stranger, were circumcised with him.
  
  CHAPTER 18
  1 And the LORD appeared unto him in the plains of Mamre: and he sat in the tent door in the heat of the day;
  2 And he lift up his eyes and looked, and, lo, three men stood by him: and when he saw [them], he ran to meet them from the tent door, and bowed himself toward the ground,
  3 And said, My Lord, if now I have found favour in thy sight, pass not away, I pray thee, from thy servant:
  4 Let a little water, I pray you, be fetched, and wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree:
  5 And I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort ye your hearts; after that ye shall pass on: for therefore are ye come to your servant. And they said, So do, as thou hast said.
  6 And Abraham hastened into the tent unto Sarah, and said, Make ready quickly three measures of fine meal, knead [it], and make cakes upon the hearth.
  7 And Abraham ran unto the herd, and fetcht a calf tender and good, and gave [it] unto a young man; and he hasted to dress it.
  8 And he took butter, and milk, and the calf which he had dressed, and set [it] before them; and he stood by them under the tree, and they did eat.
  9 # And they said unto him, Where [is] Sarah thy wife? And he said, Behold, in the tent.
  10 And he said, I will certainly return unto thee according to the time of life; and, lo, Sarah thy wife shall have a son. And Sarah heard [it] in the tent door, which [was] behind him.
  11 Now Abraham and Sarah [were] old [and] well stricken in age; [and] it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.
  12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?
  13 And the LORD said unto Abraham, Wherefore did Sarah laugh, saying, Shall I of a surety bear a child, which am old?
  14 Is any thing too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.
  15 Then Sarah denied, saying, I laughed not; for she was afraid. And he said, Nay; but thou didst laugh.
  16 # And the men rose up from thence, and looked toward Sodom: and Abraham went with them to bring them on the way.
  17 And the LORD said, Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do;
  18 Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him?
  19 For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.
  20 And the LORD said, Because the cry of Sodom and Gomorrah is great, and because their sin is very grievous;
  21 I will go down now, and see whether they have done altogether according to the cry of it, which is come unto me; and if not, I will know.
  22 And the men turned their faces from thence, and went toward Sodom: but Abraham stood yet before the LORD.
  23 # And Abraham drew near, and said, Wilt thou also destroy the righteous with the wicked?
  24 Peradventure there be fifty righteous within the city: wilt thou also destroy and not spare the place for the fifty righteous that [are] therein?
  25 That be far from thee to do after this manner, to slay the righteous with the wicked: and that the righteous should be as the wicked, that be far from thee: Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?
  26 And the LORD said, If I find in Sodom fifty righteous within the city, then I will spare all the place for their sakes.
  27 And Abraham answered and said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord, which [am but] dust and ashes:
  28 Peradventure there shall lack five of the fifty righteous: wilt thou destroy all the city for [lack of] five? And he said, If I find there forty and five, I will not destroy [it].
  29 And he spake unto him yet again, and said, Peradventure there shall be forty found there. And he said, I will not do [it] for forty’s sake.
  30 And he said [unto him], Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak: Peradventure there shall thirty be found there. And he said, I will not do [it], if I find thirty there.
  31 And he said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord: Peradventure there shall be twenty found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for twenty’s sake.
  32 And he said, Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak yet but this once: Peradventure ten shall be found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for ten’s sake.
  33 And the LORD went his way, as soon as he had left communing with Abraham: and Abraham returned unto his place.
  
  CHAPTER 19
  1 And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing [them] rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face toward the ground;
  2 And he said, Behold now, my lords, turn in, I pray you, into your servant’s house, and tarry all night, and wash your feet, and ye shall rise up early, and go on your ways. And they said, Nay; but we will abide in the street all night.
  3 And he pressed upon them greatly; and they turned in unto him, and entered into his house; and he made them a feast, and did bake unleavened bread, and they did eat.
  4 # But before they lay down, the men of the city, [even] the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:
  5 And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where [are] the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.
  6 And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him,
  7 And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly.
  8 Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as [is] good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.
  9 And they said, Stand back. And they said [again], This one [fellow] came in to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them. And they pressed sore upon the man, [even] Lot, and came near to break the door.
  10 But the men put forth their hand, and pulled Lot into the house to them, and shut to the door.
  11 And they smote the men that [were] at the door of the house with blindness, both small and great: so that they wearied themselves to find the door.
  12 # And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring [them] out of this place:
  13 For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the LORD; and the LORD hath sent us to destroy it.
  14 And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the LORD will destroy this city. But he seemed as one that mocked unto his sons in law.
  15 # And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city.
  16 And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife, a
  
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- Bill Doltree says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:41 pm
  
  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 
  Log in to Reply
  - MD Burbs says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 9:03 am
    
    Psssst, you’re late for the Inquisition.
    
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    - FUWI says:
      
      July 7, 2012 at 2:09 pm
      
      ROFLMAO!!!
      
      He’s getting his angries out.
      
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- tcaster says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 10:59 am
  
  Y’all are gonna love this.
  http://audio.skeyelab.com/howtospeakhip/
  
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Urban Infidel (@urbaninfidel) says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:43 am

The other day I was walking down Bedford Avenue and overheard one rubberband-bodied hipster say to another, “I’m so addicted to my phone, I never look up anymore.”

And I spotted this “Hipsters Deserve to Die” poster on Wythe Avenue and N. 4th Street a couple of days ago.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/46896052@N00/sets/72157630434143966/show/

Went by yesterday and it’s gone.

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- MD Burbs says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 11:04 am
  
  “I’m so addicted to my phone, I never look up anymore.”
  The stupid is strong in this one – Natural Selection is watching.
  
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  - Pat I says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 12:04 pm
    
    Bingo. That’s why my son and I love to people watch. nothing like watching some tex-obsessive d*8chebag wall full force into a glass door because he wasn’t looking.
    
    Now if only we can start removing manhole covers….
    
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    - Urban Infidel (@urbaninfidel) says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 2:06 pm
      
      Spotted. The poster boy for the Committee to Remove Manhole Covers.
      
      http://www.flickr.com/photos/46896052@N00/7387405232/in/set-72157630163035376/
      
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    - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 8:39 pm
      
      I love watching people wall full force. What’s a tex-obsessive?
      
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      - FUWI says:
        
        July 7, 2012 at 2:12 pm
        
        Well Johnny, on the internet they are often grammar nazi’s who like to obsess over, aka ‘troll’, website forums and boards. Their liveable irony is that they don’t feel as strongly about grammar and spelling when it comes to using their iShit to send msgs.
        
        Do you understand or…should we put it even more simply?
        
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DieHipsterScum says:

July 5, 2012 at 11:46 am

The NY Times did a feature on NYC’s ‘Power Siblings’, and I had to laugh at the first and third pairs (The Antonoffs and the Macklovitches)… they are the perfect embodiment of what this blog is about. Where as the other sibling pairs featured here appear to have a diligent sense of enterprise and businesses with real purpose, the two Antonoff idiots are all about retro fun, fun, fun!!! Like, yah! And please don’t get me started on the Macklovitch siblings… What a couple of douschey-better-than-thou-look-at-meeeeees. GROW THE FUCK UP!!!!

http://www.nytimes.com/2012/07/05/fashion/new-yorks-power-siblings-make-names-for-themselves.html?_r=1&hpw

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- Mohawk Vellum says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 1:58 pm
  
  Chris and Heather Tierney, from INDIANA, put the best Vietnamese place to eat in the city out of business with their little bar. AND put >30 people out of work. The place was called Vietnam and had been there for ages. It was the best place to go on a Sunday for rolls. Fucking Indiana. And don’t even look at the web page for the place – I’m so mad I want to vomit.
  
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  - linguini leg cracker says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 2:05 pm
    
    I just came back to post something similar. Although they may not be as visually hipster as the other pairs, the Tierneys are from Indianapolis, and they did open non-chinese restaurants in china town. If there’s one thing that a hipster would say, it’s “what this chinese area really needs is some Mexico City street food”…
    Oh, and apparently their first restaurant featured a $175 hamburger. Is that for real? And they blame the recession for that business plan failing? Only a hipster!
    
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    - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 8:45 pm
      
      LOL!
      
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  - DieHipsterScum says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 2:12 pm
    
    I stand corrected… I honestly didn’t read their story. I read the others’ and missed this douschebag duo! What a shame :/ I didn’t know about that restaurant
    
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  - Mickey Shea says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 8:22 pm
    
    I was heartbroken when that restaurant closed. I had been going there since the 80s when it
    was called Vietnam right up to the end when it was called Doyers St.restaurant. Had the greatest memories from that joint. Now I know who the douchebags are who are responsible.
    
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  - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 8:40 pm
    
    How does a bar make a Vietnamese restaurant go out of business?
    
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- MD Burbs says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 4:16 pm
  
  They’re the Incest Poster Children ™.
  
  Log in to Reply
- sledgehammer says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 6:08 pm
  
  “David, 34, is enrolled at Columbia University, where he is finishing a Ph.D. in French literature. His dissertation is titled “Theorizing the Pleasure of Reading in 18th-Century France.” Plays guitar, lives in Williamsburg.
  
  I think I need to puke now.
  
  Log in to Reply
  - Mickey Shea says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 8:24 pm
    
    Like yah, my phd is in Deconstructing French Existentialism. Like yah, you can call me
    Doctor now.
    
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    - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 9:04 pm
      
      I don’t think you can get a Ph.D. in “Deconstructing French Existentialism”. You probably mean something more along the lines of cultural criticism or cultural studies, though.
      
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  - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 8:41 pm
    
    Your dissertation is so much better.
    
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DieHipsterScum says:

July 5, 2012 at 11:47 am

And the accompanying pics…

http://www.nytimes.com/slideshow/2012/06/28/fashion/20120628_SIBS-2.html

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- JAZ says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 2:00 pm
  
  LIKE YAH!!!!!!! WE ARE FEATURED IN THE NY TIMES BECAUSE WE ARE YOUNG QUIRKY AND CREATIVE !!!!!! LIKEEEEEE YAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
  
  Log in to Reply
  - DieHipsterScum says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 2:13 pm
    
    LIKE LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEEE!!! YAAAHHH!!!!!!!!!!!
    
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    - Vodka says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 5:39 pm
      
      If you could hunt hipsters, it would be similar to hunting a 3 month old cub that’s been chained to a tree: That easy.
      
      They stick out like a sore thumb, they always try to get your attention, and there is distinguishable malodorous, foul air to them that would give a sewage plant a run for its money.
      
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  - sledgehammer says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 5:45 pm
    
    They’re featured in the NYT because their rich parents have some richy rich connections. I personally would like to make a connection with their heads and baseball bats.
    
    Not impressed with the Anna Wintour assistant. There’s an unspoken fact in the fashion business: you can have no talent and nothing but empty vacuous space between your ears; but if you show up in $5000 worth of designer clothing every day(borrowed/hand-me-down/and or bought from mommy), and the magazine people know you as the daughter of so-and-so charity/big museum/other richy rich board member/billionaire heiress, you will slide right into the job.
    
    In the fashion industry it’s actually cooler to say you went into mommy’s closet and took her $3000 Dior handbag and off-handedly say “oh, she’ll never notice” than to say you worked hard and saved every penny to buy it yourself. Coming into work in overpriced fall-apart vintage rags, knockoffs of Christian Louboutin platform heels, Forever 21 crap, faux Coach bags bought on Canal St. and Urban Outfitters hipster scarves won’t cut it at Vogue. They may let you be an intern there, but you’ll never get much further than that.
    
    The rest of the plebes, even though they may be smarter(doubtful in the fashion industry though), who are willing to work hard and may have actual talent but are not socially connected, will have to wait in a long, long line for NYT coverage.
    
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- Mickey Shea says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 8:25 pm
  
  Jesus, a bunch of walking Jack Skellingtons
  
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The Pontificator says:

July 5, 2012 at 12:09 pm

“Josh from Osh Kosh”

Rice Krispy treat-eating waste of sperm…

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uesider says:

July 5, 2012 at 12:16 pm

Just to remind everyone, it is “Williamsburg Night” at Cyclones Stadium. Someone needs to talk to the management about letting these beardos below the line. After the game, unlucky fans will be treated to “Skinny Jeans Post-Game Run the Bases.”

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SwampYankee says:

July 5, 2012 at 12:50 pm

Chewing Gum!!!!!! thats it. thanks DH. I’ve been trying to get them to stick to the wall and nothing works. The nail gun wouldn’t do it and if the the staple gun went right through them even when using 1/2″ staples. It’s like they are made of tissue. Chewing gum…..should have thought of that

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- Pat I says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 12:59 pm
  
  A a rabid rottweiler works well for me.
  
  Log in to Reply
- No thanks says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 8:38 pm
  
  You’re a hipster.
  
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Pat I says:

July 5, 2012 at 3:48 pm

http://www.coffeereview.com/allreviews.cfm?cupdate=%7Bts%20%272012%2D06%2D05%2000%3A00%3A00%27%7D

Introducing: A new way to burn through your parent’s retirement fund!

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- MD Burbs says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 4:23 pm
  
  Those are in New Taiwanese Dollars (NT$), which go 29.89 to the U.S. greenback. The shipping will kill you though…
  http://coinmill.com/TWD_calculator.html#USD=1
  
  Log in to Reply
  - Pat I says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 4:49 pm
    
    I know. But that’s 60 bucks a pound….without shipping.
    
    Log in to Reply
    - MD Burbs says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 4:55 pm
      
      Yup, and it’s all Monopoly money to them anyway.
      
      Log in to Reply
    - Mickey Shea says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 8:28 pm
      
      You know those little individual coffee canisters that fit into that special machine to make one cup of coffee? I read that by weight, you end up paying roughly 51 bucks a pound for the coffee. Suckers….
      
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- SwampYankee says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 6:48 pm
  
  Jeez. I had a cup of 7-11 this morning for $2.09 (it was a big one). I like 7-11. I go in, I make a cup myself, I pay, I leave. Even Dunkin Fucking Donuts now has a tip jar out. Maybe I just like 7-11 because they have PARKING!!! Even if the hipster coffee tasts a bit better it’s 3x as much, takes 5x as long, and there is no where to park and I am not cycling for a cup of coffee
  
  Log in to Reply
  - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 8:47 pm
    
    I can find you some of the best “hipster” coffee in the city, and it’s $2.
    
    Log in to Reply
    - diehipster says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 8:49 pm
      
      LOL is $2 a bargain to you Linus?
      
      Log in to Reply
      - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
        
        July 5, 2012 at 8:54 pm
        
        Nah, I usually get $1 deli coffee. I was just pointing out that it’s cheaper than Mr. Big Gulp up there’s selection.
        
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- Awesome Dude Hipster says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 8:43 pm
  
  Why would a child receive his parents’ retirement fund?
  
  Log in to Reply
  - MD Burbs says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 9:07 am
    
    Maybe when you’re out of high school and old enough to have one you’ll find out.
    
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Wally Balls says:

July 5, 2012 at 4:07 pm

May God continue to bless you and guide you in the eradication of hipsters not only in Brooklyn but throughout the U.S.!

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eiurehruehreu says:

July 5, 2012 at 7:43 pm

Has anyone noticed the beardo on this commercial, at 39 to 40 seconds in?
[youtube http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aQgILlGg1E8&w=560&h=315%5D

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This is not my name. says:

July 5, 2012 at 8:02 pm

I like how on your FAQ you call genocide “world exploration”.

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This is not my name. says:

July 5, 2012 at 8:02 pm

“Wrong you stupid fuck! Although it is kind of sad how Europeans came here and took away this land from the native Indians – it was part of world exploration.” You are five years old.

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This is not my name. says:

July 5, 2012 at 8:04 pm

Gentrification means to make something conform to middle class standards and taste. Please explain what this has to do with so-called “hipsterdom”.

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- Curbstomping Hipsters is My Business and Business is Good! says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 8:22 pm
  
  Give up. You won’t change any minds with your weak ass attempt at an argument. If you peices of shit were as progressive and ‘caring’ as you pretend to be, you wouldn’t be so keen to displace the working poor (which is an effect of gentrification) while you pursue your second childhood.
  
  Hipsters are hated for many reasons, so it could be much worse: Instead of a blog where the beatings are imaginary, you could find yourself the victim of a real beating. Count your blessings. You pseudo-creative fauxhemian fucktards have only one redeeming quality — biodegradeability. Die hipster die!
  
  Log in to Reply
  - This is not my name. says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 8:34 pm
    
    Who are “you pieces of shit”, specifically? I’ve only lived in New York for eight years, so I’m definitely not a “New Yorker”. I have a full-time job as a software engineer, and I work in New Jersey. I don’t live in Williamsburg, but I have tons of friends who do. Every last one of them has a job (some of them work their asses off and do really well), and none of them gets money from their parents. I’m just not sure who this weird imaginary target is that you’re directing so much anger at.
    
    By the way, the “Die (something) die!” actually comes from an old Boris Karloff movie called “Die, Monster, Die!”, which is a pretty hip thing to reference, intentional or not.
    
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    - diehipster says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 8:46 pm
      
      My god. Just listen to yourself. Coming here over and over with your bearded nasally mentality under different names. Cant you simply use your awesome and gnarly liberal arts degree to figure out you and your thousands of North Brooklyn beardo buddies are hated beyond belief? How hard is simple logic? It’s always gonna be: coddled suburb soyboy VS guy who grew up in the city. End of story you stupid fuck.
      
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      - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
        
        July 5, 2012 at 8:52 pm
        
        I actually just shaved, so I don’t have a beard. I don’t have a liberal arts degree. I did go to NYU, though, which I bet makes you SUPER mad. Guess what? I’m paying for it. With my own damn money. I wish I had “thousands of North Brooklyn beardo buddies”, because that sounds pretty awesome. I’d say I have one good friend that has a beard, and it’s not large enough that one would call him a “beardo”. What I would call the most hispter-ish friends I have (as you would define them) actually were born and raised in Queens. They also have jobs and don’t get money from their parents.
        
        Log in to Reply
      - Awesome Dude Hipster says:
        
        July 5, 2012 at 9:02 pm
        
        Also, please tell me what a “nasally mentality” is.
        
        Log in to Reply
        
        Hipster Hatergade says:
        
        July 6, 2012 at 4:52 pm
        
        Trollin trolling trolling, get them doggies trolling.
        
        1. Ask inane questions, point out grammar mistakes to achieve superiority on random site.
        2. ???
        3. Profit!
        
        Why do you give a shit about this site? Why are you here? Why do you keep asking questions about stuff you don’t care about or apparently aren’t related to since OBVIOUSLY none of your friends are hipsters, you’re not one, and you don’t even know any. If the target is imaginary, why bother defending the imaginary target? Unless its real? Unless someone hit a nerve?
        
        At least grace us with the presence of some genuine wit or creative trolling. Way too goddamn obvious, F- for you.
        
        Log in to Reply
        
        FaceTheFacts says:
        
        July 6, 2012 at 5:11 pm
        
        Genuine wit or creative trolling from a hipturd? You have a better chance of seeing Steve Lam getting into Force Recon and the Mast Brothers becoming full-patched Hell’s Angels.
        
        Log in to Reply
      - Hipster Hater XXX says:
        
        July 5, 2012 at 9:18 pm
        
        I feel the same way. Why is this person even on the site?
        
        Log in to Reply
    - Urban Infidel (@urbaninfidel) says:
      
      July 6, 2012 at 10:45 am
      
      You wouldn’t understand. You’re not a native NYker, and probably neither are most of your friends who live in Williamsburg. Imagine your home town taken over by monstrously superficial, bubble-dwelling, rude people who have transformed it into a zoo of ‘LOOOK AT ME’ types. Other than the daily Halloween parade, it’s the noise, garbage and general trashing of what was once a nice old neighborhood and the insistence that there ‘was no culture’ here before you landed a few minutes ago. Yea, NY has changed, we all know that, but who said we have to embrace you as you shove us off our own sidewalks?
      
      Log in to Reply
- rott635 says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 1:06 am
  
  Did you pay attention in school or did you spend all your parents’ money just sitting in your dorm room getting high?
  
  Your definition of gentrification is laughably ignorant.
  
  Log in to Reply
Awesome Dude Hipster says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:09 pm

YO IT’S SO HOT OUT I SAW LIKE THREE HIPSTERS WEARING STOCKING CAPS AND I WAS LIKE WHUUUUUUUT?

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Awesome Dude Hipster says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:10 pm

TODAY I SAW A HIPSTER WITH A BIKE THAT WAS WAY TOO TALL FOR HIM AND I WAS ALL LIKE WHUUUUUUUUUUT?

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Awesome Dude Hipster says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:10 pm

What’s the deal with hipsters, am I right?

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- Hipster Hater XXX says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:17 pm
  
  GET RAPED! GET RAPED!
  
  Log in to Reply
- FUWI says:
  
  July 7, 2012 at 2:30 pm
  
  Calling Mr.Pupkin, calling Mr.Pupkin!!
  
  Your artisanal straight-jacket is ready!
  
  Log in to Reply
Awesome Dude Hipster says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:11 pm

LOL if hipsters were stars they’d be hipstars.

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- Hipster Hater XXX says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:13 pm
  
  Are you fucking serious? THat’s the stupidest thing I ever heard. Seriously, why don’t you spend time drinking fucking $87 iced lattes and riding around on your fixie with a mustache on the front of it?
  
  Log in to Reply
Awesome Dude Hipster says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:11 pm

I am confused and hurt by these hipsters. Their presence ruins my every day. I have scars that run deep from cuts made by hipsters.

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- Hipster Hater XXX says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:12 pm
  
  Dude, shut the fuck up!
  
  Log in to Reply
- FaceTheFacts says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:14 pm
  
  Get raped.
  
  Log in to Reply
  - Hipster Hater XXX says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 9:15 pm
    
    Seriously, can you believe this asshole? Why even spend time on teh site?
    
    Log in to Reply
    - FaceTheFacts says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 9:21 pm
      
      They actually think they’re making an impact. To say they’re “Reality Challenged” is putting it lightly.
      
      Log in to Reply
      - Hipster Hater XXX says:
        
        July 5, 2012 at 9:22 pm
        
        Yeah they’re comments are so annoying!
        
        Log in to Reply
        
        FaceTheFacts says:
        
        July 6, 2012 at 9:44 am
        
        Honestly, I find their comments too boring to be annoying. A hipturd is truly annoying in a face to face situation. It’s what makes it easy to punch one in the mouth and not have any misgiving or remorse later on.
        
        Log in to Reply
I Love the Smiths says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:22 pm

Is there a length limit on these posts? I’ll check by posting Smiths lyrics.

THE QUEEN IS DEAD

Farewell to this lands cheerless marches
hemmed in like a boar between arches
her very Lowness with her head in a sling
Im truely sorry-but it sounds like a wonderful thing
dear Charles, dont you ever crave
to appear on the front of the Daily mail
dressed in your Mother’s bridal veil?
So, I checked all the registered historical facts
and I was shocked into shame to discover
how Im the 18th pale descendent
of some, old queen or other
has the world changed, or have I changed?
has the world changed, or have I changed?
as some 9-year old tough peddles drugs
(I never even knew what drugs were)
And so, I broke into the Palace
with a sponge and a rusty spanner
she said: “Eh, I know you, and you cannot sing”
I said: “that’s nothing -you should hear me play piano”
We can go for a walk where it’s quiet and dry
and we can talk about precious things
but when you are tied to your mother’s apron
not one talks about castration
We can go for a walk where it’s quiet and dry
and we can talk about precious things
like love and law and poverty
these are the things that kill me
We can go for a walk where it’s quiet and dry
and we can talk about precious things
but the rain that flattens my hair
theses are the things that kill me
Passed the Pub that saps your body
and the church who’ll snatch your money
the Queen is dead, boys
and it’s so lonely on a limb
Pass the Pub that wrecks your body
and the church-all they want is your money
the Queen is dead, boys`
you can trust me, boys
life is very long, when you’re lonely
life is very long, when you’re lonely…

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

FRANKLY MR.SHANKLY

Frankly, Mr Shankly, this position Ive held
it pays my way, but it corrodes my soul
I want to leave you will not miss me
I want to go down in musical history
Frankly, Mr Shankly, Im a sickening wreck
Ive got the 21st Century breathing down my neck
I must move fast, you understand me
I want to go down in celluloid history
Fame, Fame, fatal Fame
it can play hideous tricks on the brain
but still I rather be Famous
than righteous or holy, any day
but sometimes Id feel more fulfilled
making Christmas cards with the mentally ill
I want to Live and I want to Love
I want to catch something that I might be ashamed of
Frankly, Mr Shankly, this position I’ve held
it pays my way and it corrodes my soul
oh, I didnt realise that you wrote poetry
(I didnt realise you wrote such bloody awful poetry)
Frankly, Mr Shankly, since you ask
you are a flatulent pain the arse
I do not mean to be so rude
but still, I must speck frankly, Mr Shankly

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

I KNOW IT’S ALL OVER

Oh Mother, I can fell the soil falling over my head
and as i climb into an empty bed
Oh well, Enough said
I know it’s over-still I cling
I don’t know where else I can go
Oh Mother, I can feel the soil falling over my head
see, the sea want s to take me
the knife wants to cut me
do you think you can help me?
Sad veiled bride, please be happy
handsome groom, give her room
loud, loutish lover, treat her kindly
(although she needs you
more than she loves you)
and I know it’s over
and it never really began
but in my heart it was so real
and you even spoke to me and said:
“If you’re so funny
then why are you on your own tonight?
and if you are so clever
then why are you on your own tonight?
if you’re so terribly good looking
then why do you sleep alone tonight?
because tonight is just like any other night
that’s why you’re on your own tonight
with your triumphs and your charms
while they are in each other’s arms..”
It’s so easy to laugh
it’s so easy to hate
it takes strength to be gentle and kind
It’s so easy to laugh
it’s so easy to hate
it takes guts to be gentle and kind
love is Natural and Real
but not for you, my love
not tonight my love
love is Natural and Real
but not for such as you and I, my love
Oh Mother, I can fell the soil falling over my head
Oh Mother, I can fell the soil falling over my head…

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

NEVER HAD NO ONE EVER

When you walk without ease
on these
the very streets where you were raised
I had a really bad dream
it lasted 20 years, 7 months, and 27 days
Never had no one ever.

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

CEMETERY GATES

A dreaded sunny day
so I meet you at the cemetry gates
Keats and Yeats are on your side
A dreaded sunny day
so I meet you at the cemetry gates
Keats and Yeats are on your side
while Wilde is on mine
So we go inside and we gravely read the stones
all those people all those lives
where are they now ?
with loves, and hates
and passions just like mine
they were born
and then they lived and then they died
which seems so unfair
and I wantr to crv
You say: “ere thrice the sun hath done salutation to the dawn”
and you claim these words as your own
but Im well-read, have heard them said
a hundred times (maybe less, maybe more)
if you must write prose/poems
the words you use should be your own
dont plagiarise or take “on loans”
there’s alweays someone, somewhere
with a big nose, who knows
and who trips you up and laughs
when you fall
You say: “ere long done do does did ”
words which could only be your own
you then produce the text
from whence was ripped
(some dizzy whore, 1804)
A dreaded sunny day
so let’s go where we’re happy
so I meet you at the cemetry gates
Keats and Yeats are on your side
A dreaded sunny day
so let’s go where we’re wanted
so I meet you at the cemetry gates
Keats and Yeats are on your side
but you lose
because Wilde is on mine

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

BIGMOUTH STRIKES AGAIN

Sweetness, sweetness I was only joking
when I said Id like to smash every tooth
in your head
Sweetness, sweetness I was only joking
when I said by right s you should be
bludgeoned in your bed
and now I know how Joan of Arc felt
now I know how Joan of Arc felt
as the flames roseto her roman nose
and her Walkman stared to melt
Bibmouth, bigmouth
bigmouth strikes again
and Ive got no right to take my place
with the Human race
and now I know how Joan of Arc felt
now I know of Joan of Arc felt
as the flames rose to her roman nose
and her hearing aid started to melt
Bigmouth, bigmouth
bigmouth strikes again
and Ive got no right to take my place
with the Human race

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

THE BOY WITH A THORN IN HIS SIDE

The boy with the thorn in his side
behind the hatred there lies
a murderous desire for love
how can they look into my eyes
and still they dont believe me
how can they hear me say those words
and still they dont believe me
and if they don’t believe me now
will they ever believe me?
and if they don’t believe me now
will they ever believe me?
The boy with the thorn in his side
behind the hatred there lies
a plundering desire for love
how can they see the Love in our eyes
and still they don’t believe us
and after all this time
they don’t want to believe us
and if they dont believe us now
will they ever believe us ?
andd when you want to Live
how do you start ?
where do you go ?
who do you know?

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

VICAR IN A TUTU

I was minding mind business
lifting some lead off
the roof of the Holy Name church
it was worthwhile living a laughable life
just to set my eyes on a blistering sight
of a vicar in a tu-tu
he’s not strange
he just wants to live his life this way
a scanty bit of a thing
with a decorative ring
that wouldn’t cover the head of a child
as Rose collects the money in the cannister
who comes sliding down the bannister
the vicar in a tu-tu
he’s not strange
he just wants to live his life this way
the monkish monsignor
with a head full of plaster
said “my man, get your vile soul dry-cleaned”
as Rose counts the money in the cannister
as natural as rain
he dances again
vicar in a tu-tu
The next day in the pulpit
with Freedom and Ease
combating ignoranca,dust and disease
as Rose counts the money in the cannister
as natural as rain
he dances again
the fabric of a tu-tu
any man could get us to
and I am a living sign.

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

THERE IS A LIGHT THAT NEVER GOES OUT

Take me out tonight
where there’s music and there’s people
who are young and alive
driving in your car
I never never want to go home
because I havent got one
anymore
take me out tonight
because I want to see people and I
want to see lights
driving in your car
oh please dont drop me home
because it’s not my home, it’s their
home, and Im welcome no morw
and if a double-decker bus
crashes in to us
to die by your side
such a heavenly way to die
and if a ten ton truck
kills the both of us
to die by your side
the pleasure and the privilege is mine
take me out tonight
oh take me anywhere, I dont care
and in the darken underpass
I thought Oh God, my chance has come at last
(but then a strange fear gripped me and I just couldn’t ask)
take me out tonight
take me anywhere, I dont care
just driving in your car
I never never want to go home
because I havent got one
I havent got one.

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

SOME GIRLS ARE BIGGER THAN OTHERS

From the ice-age to the dole-age
there is but one concern
and I have just discover
some girls are bigger than others
some girls are bigger than others
some girls mothers are bigger than
other girls mothers
As Anthony said to Cleopatra
as he opened a crate of ale:
some girls are bigger than others
some girls are bigger than others
some girls mothers are bigger than
other girls mothers.

BACK TO TOP | BACK TO DATABASE

THE HEADMASTER RITUAL

Belligerent ghouls
run Manchester schools
spineless swines
cemented mines
Sir leads the troops
jealous of youth
same old suit since 1962
he does the military two-step
down the nape of my neck
I wanna go home
I don’t want to stay
give up education
is a bad mistake
mid-week on the playing fields
Sir thwacks you on the knees
knees you in the groin
elbow in the face
I wanna go home
I don’t want to stay
Belligerent ghouls
run Manchester schools
spineless bastards all
Sir leads the troops
jealous of youth
same old jokes since 1902
he does the military two-step
down the nape of my neck
I wanna go home
I don’t want to stay
give up life
as a bad mistake
please excuse me from gym
I’ve got this terrible cold coming on
he grabs and devours
he kicks me in the showers
kicks me in the showers
and he grabs and devours
I wanna go home
I don’t want to stay

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RUSHOLME RUFFIANS

The last night at the fair
by the big wheel generator
a boy is stabbed
and his money is grabbed
and the air hangs heavy like a dulling wine
she is famous
she is funny
an engagement ring
doesn’t mean a thing
to a mind consumed by brass(money)
and though I walk home alone
my faith in love is still devout
the last night at the fair
from a seat on a whirling waltzer
her skirt ascends for a watching eye
it’s a hideous trait( on her mother’s side)
and though I walk home alone
my faith in love is still devout
then someone falls in love
and someone’s beaten up
and the senses being dulled are mine
and someone falls in love
someone’s beaten up
and the senses being dulled are mine
and though I walk home alone
my faith in love is still devout
this is the last night of the fair
and the grease in the hair
of a speedway operator
is all a tremulous heart requires
a schoolgirl is denied
she said “How quickly would I die
if I jumped from the top of the parachutes?”
this is the last night of the fair
and the grease in the hair
of a speedway operator
is all a tremulous heart requires
a schoolgirl is denied
she said “How quickly would I die
if I jumped from the top of the parachutes?”
scratch my name on your arm with a fountain pen
(this means you really love me)
scratch my name on your arm with a fountain pen
(this means you really love me)
and though I walk home alone
my faith in love is still devout

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I WANT THE ONE I CAN’T HAVE

On the day that your mentality
catches up with your biology
I want the one I can’t have
and it’s driving me mad
it’s written all over my face
A double-bed
and a stalwart lover, for sure
these are the riches of the poor
A double-bed
and a stalwart lover, for sure
these are the riches of the poor
a tough kid who sometimes swallows nails
raised on Prisoner’s Aid
he killed a policeman when he was thirteen
and somehow that really impressed me
it’s written all over my face
On the day that your mentality
catches up with your biology
And if you ever need self-validation
just meet me in the alley by the
railway-station
it’s written all over my face

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WHAT SHE SAID

What she said:
“How come someone hasn’t noticed
that I’m dead
and decided to bury me
God knows, I’m ready”
What she said was
but then, all the rejection she’s had
to pretend to be happy
could only be idiocy
What she said was not for the job or
lover that she never had
What she read
all heady books
she’d sit and prophesise
(it took a tattoed boy from Birkenhead
to really really open her eyes)
What she read
all heady books
she’d sit and prophesise
(it took a tattoed boy from Birkenhead
to really really open her eyes)
What she said:
“I smoke ‘cos I’m hoping for an early death
AND I NEED TO CLING TO SOMETHING
What she said:
“I smoke ‘cos I’m hoping for an early death
AND I NEED TO CLING TO SOMETHING!”

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THAT JOKE ISN’T FUNNY ANYMORE

Park the car at the side of the road
you should know
time’s tide will smother you
and I will too
when you laugh about other people who feel so
very lonely
their only desire is to die
well I’m afraid
it doesn’t make me smile
I wish I could laugh
but that joke isn’t funny anymore
it’s too close to home and it’s too near the bone
it’s too close to home and it’s too near the bone
more than you’ll ever know
It was dark as I drove the point home
and on cold leather seats
well, it suddenly struck me
I just might die with a smile on my
face after all
I’ve seen this happen in other people’s lives
and now it’s happening in mine

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NOWHERE FAST

I’d like to drop my trousers to the world
I am a man of means(of slender means)
each household appliance
is like a new science in my town
and if a day came when I felt a natural emotion
I’d get such a shock I’d probably jump in the ocean
and when a train goes by
it’s such a sad sound
I’d like to drop my trousers to the Queen
every sensible child will know what this means
the poor and the needy
are selfish and greedy on her terms
and if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I’d get such a shock I’d probably jump in the ocean
and when a train goes by
it’s such a sad song
And when I’m lying in my bed
I think about life
and I think about death
and neither one particularly appeals to me
and if the day came when I felt a natural emotion
I’d get such a shock I’d probably lie
in the middle of the street and die
I’d lie down and die

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WELL I WONDER

Well I wonder
do you hear me when you sleep?
I hoarsely cry
Well I wonder
do you see me when we pass?
I half-die
Please keep me in mind
please keep me in mind
Gasping-but somehow still alive
this is the fierce last stand of all I am
Gasping-dying-but somehow still alive
this is the final stand of all I am
Please keep me in mind

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BARBARISM BEGINS AT HOME

Unruly boys
who will not grow up
must be taken in hand
Unruly girls
who will not settle down
they must be taken in hand
A crack on the head
is what you get for not asking
and a crack on the head
is what you get for asking

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MEAT IS MURDER

Heifer whines could be human cries
closer comes the screaming knife
this beautiful creature must die
this beautiful creature must die
a death for no reason
and death for reason is MURDER
and the flesh you so fancifully fry
is not succulent, tasty or nice
it’s death for no reason
and death for no reason is MURDER
and the calf that you carve with a smile
is MURDER
and the turkey you festively slice
is MURDER
do you know how animals die?
kitchen aroma aren’t very homely
it’s not “comforting,” “cheery” or kind
it’s sizzling blood and the unholy stench
of MURDER
it’s not “natural,” “normal” or kind
the fleas you so fancifully fry
as you savour the flavour
of MURDER
NO, NO, NO, IT’S MURDER
NO, NO, NO, IT’S MURDER
who hears when animals cry?

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Log in to Reply
- SwampYankee says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 5:00 am
  
  I was into cut & paste before it was cool
  
  Log in to Reply
I Love HTML says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:24 pm

YO DO THESE POSTS SUPPORT **MARKDOWN** OR HTML

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- I Hate HTML says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 9:24 pm
  
  NO
  
  Log in to Reply
It's just the entire KJV Bible! says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:26 pm

THE HOLY BIBLE

CONTAINING THE OLD AND NEW TESTAMENTS

TRANSLATED OUT OF THE ORIGINAL TONGUES AND WITH THE FORMER TRANSLATIONS DILIGENTLY COMPARED AND REVISED BY HIS MAJESTY’S SPECIAL COMMAND

APPOINTED TO BE READ IN CHURCHES

THE TEXT CONFORMABLE TO THAT OF THE EDITION OF 1611 COMMONLY KNOWN AS THE AUTHORIZED OR KING JAMES VERSION

THE TRANSLATORS TO THE READER

The best things have been calumniated

Zeal to promote the common good, whether it be by devising anything ourselves, or revising that which hath been laboured by others, deserveth certainly much respect and esteem, but yet findeth but cold entertainment in the world. It is welcomed with suspicion instead of love, and with emulation instead of thanks: and if there be any hole left for cavil to enter (and cavil, if it do not find a hole, will make one), it is sure to be misconstrued, and in danger to be condemned. This will easily be granted by as many as know story, or have any experience. For, was there ever anything projected, that savoured any way of newness or renewing, but the same endured many a storm of gainsaying, or opposition? A man would think that civility, wholesome laws, learning and eloquence, synods, and church maintenance (that we speak of no more things of this kind) should be as safe as a sanctuary, and out of shot, as they say, that no man would lift up the heel; no, nor dog move his tongue against the motioners of them. For by the first, we are distinguished from brute beasts led with sensuality; by the second, we are bridled and restrained from outrageous behaviour, and from doing of injuries, whether by fraud or by violence; by the third, we are enabled to inform and reform others, by the light and feeling that we have attained unto ourselves; briefly, by the fourth being brought together to a parle face to face, we sooner compose our differences than by writings, which are endless; and lastly, that the church be sufficiently provided for, is so agreeable to good reason and conscience, that those mothers are holden to be less cruel, that kill their children as soon as they are born, than those nursing fathers and mothers (wheresoever they be) that withdraw from them who hang upon their breasts (and upon whose breasts again themselves do hang to receive the spiritual and sincere milk of the word) livelihood and support fit for their estates. Thus it is apparent, that these things which we speak of, are of most necessary use, and therefore, that none, either without absurdity can speak against them, or without note of wickedness can spurn against them.

Yet for all that, the learned know that certain worthy men have been brought to untimely death for none other fault, but for seeking to reduce their countrymen to good order and discipline; and that in some commonweals it was made a capital crime, once to motion the making of a new law for the abrogating of an old, though the same were most pernicious; and that certain, which would be counted pillars of the state, and patterns of virtue and prudence, could not be brought for a long time to give way to good letters and refined speech, but bare themselves as averse from them, as from rocks or boxes of poison; and fourthly, that he was no babe, but a great clerk, that gave forth (and in writing to remain to posterity) in passion peradventure, but yet he gave forth, that he had not seen any profit to come by any synod, or meeting of the clergy, but rather the contrary; and lastly, against church maintenance and allowance, in such sort, as the ambassadors and messengers of the great King of Kings should be furnished, it is not unknown what a fiction or fable (so it is esteemed, and for no better by the reporter himself, though superstitious) was devised–namely, that at such a time as the professors and teachers of Christianity in the Church of Rome, then a true church, were liberally endowed, a voice forsooth was heard from heaven, saying, “Now is poison poured down into the church,” etc.. Thus not only as oft as we speak, as one saith, but also as oft as we do anything of note or consequence, we subject ourselves to everyone’s censure, and happy is he that is least tossed upon tongues; for utterly to escape the snatch of them it is impossible. If any man conceit, that this is the lot and portion of the meaner sort only, and that princes are privileged by their high estate, he is deceived. “As the sword devoureth as well one as the other,” as it is in Samuel ; nay, as the great commander charged his soldiers in a certain battle, to strike at no part of the enemy, but at the face; and as the king of Syria commanded his chief captains to “fight neither with small nor great, save only against the king of Israel” ; so it is too true, that Envy striketh most spitefully at the fairest, and at the chiefest. David was a worthy prince, and no man to be compared to him for his first deeds, and yet for as worthy as act as ever he did (even for bringing back the Ark of God in solemnity), he was scorned and scoffed at by his own wife. Solomon was greater than David–though not in virtue, yet in power–and by his power and wisdom he built a temple to the LORD, such a one as was the glory of the land of Israel, and the wonder of the whole world. But was that his magnificence liked of by all? We doubt of it. Otherwise, why do they lay it in his son’s dish, and call unto him for easing of the burden : “Make,” say they, “the grievous servitude of thy father, and his sore yoke, lighter”? Belike he had charged them with some levies, and troubled them with some carriages. Hereupon they raise up a tragedy, and wish in their heart the temple had never been built. So hard a thing it is to please all, even when we please God best, and do seek to approve ourselves to every one’s conscience.

The highest personages have been calumniated

If we will descend to later times, we shall find many the like examples of such kind, or rather unkind, acceptance. The first Roman emperor did never do a more pleasing deed to the learned, nor more profitable to posterity, for conserving the record of times in true supputation, than when he corrected the calendar, and ordered the year according to the course of the sun; and yet this was imputed to him for novelty, and arrogancy, and procured to him great obloquy. So the first christened emperor (at the leastwise, that openly professed the faith himself, and allowed others to do the like), for strengthening the empire at his great charges, and providing for the church as he did, got for his labour the name “Pupillus,” as who would say, a wasteful prince, that had need of a guardian or overseer. So the best christened emperor, for the love that he bare unto peace, thereby to enrich both himself and his subjects, and because he did not see war but find it, was judged to be no man at arms (though indeed he excelled in feats of chivalry, and showed so much when he was provoked), and condemned for giving himself to his ease, and to his pleasure. To be short, the most learned emperor of former times (at the least, the greatest politician), what thanks had he for cutting off the superfluities of the laws, and digesting them into some order and method? This, that he hath been blotted by some to be an epitomist–that is, one that extinguished worthy whole volumes, to bring his abridgments into request. This is the measure that hath been rendered to excellent princes in former times, even, Cum bene facerent, male audire–”for their good deeds to be evil spoken of.” Neither is there any likelihood that envy and malignity died and were buried with the ancient. No, no, the reproof of Moses taketh hold of most ages: “You are risen up in your fathers’ stead, an increase of sinful men”. “What is that that hath been done? that which shall be done, and there is no new thing under the sun,” saith the wise man ; and St. Stephen, “As your fathers did, so do you”.

His Majesty’s constancy, notwithstanding calumniation, for the survey of the English translations

This, and more to this purpose, His Majesty that now reigneth (and long, and long may he reign, and his offspring forever, “Himself and children, and children’s children always”) knew full well, according to the singular wisdom given unto him by God, and the rare learning and experience that he hath attained unto; namely that whosoever attempteth anything for the public (especially if it pertain to religion, and to the opening and clearing of the word of God), the same setteth himself upon a stage to be glouted upon by every evil eye; yea, he casteth himself headlong upon pikes, to be gored by every sharp tongue. For he that meddleth with men’s religion in any part, meddleth with their custom, nay, with their freehold; and though they find no content in that which they have, yet they cannot abide to hear of altering. Notwithstanding, his royal heart was not daunted or discouraged for this that colour, but stood resolute, “as a statue immovable, and an anvil not easy to be beaten into plates”, as one saith; he knew who had chosen him to be a soldier, or rather a captain, and being assured that the course which he intended made much for the glory of God, and the building up of his church, he would not suffer it to be broken off for whatsoever speeches or practices. It doth certainly belong unto kings, yea, it doth specially belong unto them, to have care of religion; yea, to know it aright; yea, to profess it zealously; yea, to promote it to the uttermost of their power. This is their glory before all nations which mean well, and this will bring unto them a far most excellent weight of glory in the day of the Lord Jesus. For the Scripture saith not in vain, “Them that honor me, I will honor” ; neither was it a vain word that Eusebius delivered long ago, that piety towards God was the weapon, and the only weapon, that both preserved Constantine’s person, and avenged him of his enemies.

The praise of the Holy Scriptures

But now what piety without truth? what truth (what saving truth) without the word of God? What word of God (whereof we may be sure) without the Scripture? The Scriptures we are commanded to search, John 5:39, Isa. 8:20. They are commended that searched and studied them, Acts 17:11 and 8:28-29. They are reproved that were unskillful in them, or slow to believe them, Matt. 22:29, Luke 24:25. They can make us wise unto salvation, 2 Tim. 3:15. If we be ignorant, they will instruct us; if out of the way, they will bring us home; if out of order, they will reform us; if in heaviness, comfort us; if dull, quicken us; if cold, inflame us. Tolle, lege; tolle, lege, “take up and read, take up and read” the Scriptures (for unto them was the direction), it was said unto St. Augustine by a supernatural voice. “Whatsoever is in the Scriptures, believe me,” saith the same St. Augustine, “is high and divine; there is verily truth, and a doctrine most fit for the refreshing of men’s minds, and truly so tempered, that everyone may draw from thence that which is sufficient for him, if he come to draw with a devout and pious mind, as true religion requireth”. Thus St. Augustine. And St. Jerome: Ama scripturas, et amabit te sapientia, etc., “Love the Scriptures, and wisdom will love thee.” And St. Cyril against Julian: “Even boys that are bred up in the Scriptures, become most religious, etc.”. But what mention we three or four uses of the Scripture, whereas whatsoever is to be believed or practiced, or hoped for, is contained in them? or three or four sentences of the Fathers, since whosoever is worthy the name of a Father, from Christ’s time downward, hath likewise written not only of the riches, but also of the perfection of the Scripture? “I adore the fulness of the Scripture,” saith Tertullian against Hermogenes. And again, to Apelles, an heretic of the like stamp, he saith, “I do not admit that which thou bringest in (or concludest) of thine own (head or store, de tuo) without scripture.” So St. Justin Martyr before him: “We must know by all means,” saith he, “that it is not lawful (or possible) to learn (anything) of God or of right piety, save only out of the prophets, who teach us by divine inspiration”. So Saint Basil after Tertullian, “It is a manifest falling way from the faith, and a fault of presumption, either to reject any of those things that are written, or to bring in (upon the head of them, epeisagein) any of those things that are not written”. We omit to cite to the same effect, St. Cyril, b of Jerusalem, in his Fourth Cataches, St. Jerome against Helvidius, St. Augustine in his third book against the letters of Petilian, and in very many other places of his works. Also we forebear to descend to later Fathers, because we will not weary the reader. The Scriptures then being acknowledged to be so full and so perfect, how can we excuse ourselves of negligence, if we do not study them? of curiosity, if we be not content with them? Men talk much of eiresiwnh, how many sweet and goodly things it had hanging on it; of the Philosopher’s Stone, that it turneth copper into gold; of cornucopia, that it had all things necessary for food in it; of Panaces the herb, that it was good for diseases; of Catholicon the drug, that it is in stead of all purges; of Vulcan’s armor, that it was an armor of proof against all thrusts and all blows, etc.. Well, that which they falsely or vainly attributed to these things for bodily good, we may justly and with full measure ascribe unto the Scripture, for spiritual. It is not only an armor, but also a whole armory of weapons, both offensive and defensive, whereby we may save ourselves and put the enemy to flight. It is not an herb, but a tree, or rather a whole paradise of trees of life, which bring forth fruit every month, and the fruit thereof is for meat, and the leaves for medicine. It is not a pot of manna, or a cruse of oil, which were for memory only, or for a meal’s meat or two, but as it were a shower of heavenly bread sufficient for a whole host, be it never so great; and as it were a whole cellar full of oil vessels; whereby all our necessities may be provided for, and our debts discharged. In a word, it is a panary of wholesome food against finewed traditions; a physician’s shop (St. Basil calleth it) of preservatives against poisoned heresies; a pandect of profitable laws against rebellious spirits; a treasury of most costly jewels against beggarly rudiments; finally, a fountain of most pure water springing up unto everlasting life. And what marvel? The original thereof being from heaven, not from earth; the Author being God, not man; the Inditer, the Holy Spirit, not the wit of the apostles or prophets; the penmen such as were sanctified from the womb, and endued with a principal portion of God’s spirit; the matter, verity, piety, purity, uprightness; the form, God’s word, God’s testimony, God’s oracles, the word of truth, the word of salvation, etc.; the effects, light of understanding, stableness of persuasion, repentance from dead works, newness of life, holiness, peace, joy in the Holy Ghost; lastly, the end and reward of the study thereof, fellowship with the saints, participation of the heavenly nature, fruition of an inheritance immortal, undefiled, and that never shall fade away. Happy is the man that delighteth in the Scripture, and thrice happy that meditateth in it day and night.

Translation necessary

But how shall men meditate in that which they cannot understand? How shall they understand that which is kept close in an unknown tongue? As it is written, “Except I know the power of the voice, I shall be to him that speaketh a barbarian, and he that speaketh shall be a barbarian to me”. The apostle excepteth no tongue; not Hebrew the ancientest, not Greek the most copious, not Latin the finest. Nature taught a natural man to confess that all of us in those tongues which we do not understand are plainly deaf; we may turn the deaf ear unto them. The Scythian counted the Athenian, whom he did not understand, barbarous ; so the Roman did the Syrian and the Jew (even St. Jerome himself called the Hebrew tongue barbarous, belike because it was strange to so many) ; so the Emperor of Constantinople calleth the Latin tongue barbarous, though Pope Nicolas do storm at it: ; so the Jews long before Christ called all other nations Lognazim, which is little better than barbarous. Therefore as one complaineth, that always in the senate of Rome, there was one or other that called for an interpreter, so, lest the church be driven to the like exigent, it is necessary to have translations in a readiness. Translation it is that openeth the window, to let in the light; that breaketh the shell, that we may eat the kernel; that putteth aside the curtain, that we may look into the most holy place; that removeth the cover of the well, that we may come by the water, even as Jacob rolled away the stone from the mouth of the well, by which means the flocks of Laban were watered. Indeed, without translation into the vulgar tongue, the unlearned are but like children at Jacob’s well (which was deep) without a bucket or something to draw with; or as that person mentioned by Isaiah, to whom when a sealed book was delivered, with this motion, “Read this, I pray thee,” he was fain to make this answer: “I cannot, for it is sealed”.

The translation of the Old Testament out of the Hebrew into Greek

While God would be known only in Jacob, and have his name great in Israel, and in none other place; while the dew lay on Gideon’s fleece only, and all the earth besides was dry; then for one and the same people, which spake all of them the language of Canaan–that is, Hebrew–, one and the same original in Hebrew was sufficient. But when the fulness of time drew near that the Sun of righteousness, the Son of God, should come into the world, whom God ordained to be a reconciliation through faith in His blood, not of the Jew only, but also of the Greek, yea, of all them that were scattered abroad; then lo, it pleased the Lord to stir up the spirit of a Greek prince (Greek for descent and language), even of Ptolemy Philadelph, king of Egypt, to procure the translating of the book of God out of Hebrew into Greek. This is the translation of the Seventy Interpreters, commonly so called, which prepared the way for our Saviour among the Gentiles by written preaching, as St. John Baptist did among the Jews by vocal. For the Grecians, being desirous of learning, were not wont to suffer books of worth to lie moulding in kings’ libraries, but had many of their servants, ready scribes, to copy them out, and so they were dispersed and made common. Again, the Greek tongue was well known and made familiar to most inhabitants in Asia, by reason of the conquest that there the Grecians had made, as also by the Colonies, which thither they had sent. For the same causes also it was well understood in many places of Europe, yea, and of Africa too. Therefore the word of God, being set forth in Greek, becometh hereby like a candle set upon a candlestick, which giveth light to all that are in the house; or like a proclamation sounded forth in the market place, which most men presently take knowledge of; and therefore that language was fittest to contain the Scriptures, both for the first preachers of the gospel to appeal unto for witness, and for the learners also of those times to make search and trial by. It is certain, that that translation was not so sound and so perfect, but it needed in many places correction; and who had been so sufficient for this work as the apostles or apostolic men? Yet it seemed good to the Holy Ghost and to them, to take that which they found (the same being for the greatest part true and sufficient), rather than making a new, in that new world and green age of the church–to expose themselves to many exceptions and cavillations, as though they made a translation to serve their own turn, and therefore bearing a witness to themselves, their witness not to be regarded. This may be supposed to be some cause why the translation of the Seventy was allowed to pass for current. Notwithstanding, though it was commended generally, yet it did not fully content the learned–no, not of the Jews. For not long after Christ, Aquila fell in hand with a new translation, and after him Theodotion, and after him Symmachus; yea, there was a fifth and a sixth edition, the authors whereof were not known. These with the Seventy made up the Hexapla, and were worthily and to great purpose compiled together by Origen. Howbeit the edition of the Seventy went away with the credit, and therefore not only was placed in the midst by Origen (for the worth and excellency thereof above the rest, as Epiphanius gathereth), but also was used by the Greek Fathers for the ground and foundation of their commentaries. Yea, Epiphanius above named doth attribute so much unto it, that he holdeth the authors thereof not only for interpreters, but also for prophets in some respect; and Justinian the Emperor, enjoining the Jews his subjects to use specially the translation of the Seventy, rendereth this reason thereof: because they were as it were enlightened with prophetical grace. Yet for all that, as the Egyptians are said of the prophet to be men and not God, and their horses flesh and not spirit ; so it is evident (and St. Jerome affirmeth as much) that the Seventy were interpreters; they were not prophets. They did many things well, as learned men; but yet as men they stumbled and fell, one while through oversight, another while through ignorance; yea, sometimes they may be noted to add to the original, and sometimes to take from it, which made the apostles to leave them many times, when they left the Hebrew, and to deliver the sense thereof according to the truth of the word, as the Spirit gave them utterance. This may suffice touching the Greek translations of the Old Testament.

Translation out of Hebrew and Greek into Latin

There were also, within a few hundred years after Christ, translations many into the Latin tongue; for this tongue also was very fit to convey the law and the gospel by, because in those times very many countries of the West, yea of the South, East and North, spake or understood Latin, being made provinces to the Romans. But now the Latin translations were too many to be all good, for they were infinite (Latini interpretes nullo modo numerari possunt, saith St. Augustine). Again they were not out of the Hebrew fountain (we speak of the Latin translations of the Old Testament) but out of the Greek stream; therefore, the Greek being not altogether clear, the Latin derived from it must needs be muddy. This moved St. Jerome–a most learned father, and the best linguist without controversy of his age or of any that went before him–to undertake the translating of the Old Testament, out of the very fountains themselves; which he performed with that evidence of great learning, judgment, industry, and faithfulness, that he hath forever bound the church unto him in a debt of special remembrance and thankfulness.

The translating of the Scripture into the vulgar tongues

Now though the Church were thus furnished with Greek and Latin translations, even before the faith of Christ was generally embraced in the empire (for the learned know that even in St. Jerome’s time, the consul of Rome and his wife were both Ethnics, and about the same time the greatest part of the senate also) ; yet for all that the godly-learned were not content to have the Scriptures in the language which they themselves understood, Greek and Latin (as the good lepers were not content to fare well themselves, but acquainted their neighbors with the store that God had sent, that they also might provide for themselves) ; but also for the behoof and edifying of the unlearned which hungered and thirsted after righteousness, and had souls to be saved as well as they, they provided translations into the vulgar for their countrymen, insomuch that most nations under heaven did shortly after their conversion, hear Christ speaking unto them in their mother tongue, not by the voice of their minister only, but also by the written word translated. If any doubt hereof, he may be satisfied by examples enough, if enough will serve the turn. First, St. Jerome saith, Multarum gentium linguis Scriptura ante translata, docet falsa esse quae addita sunt, etc.; i.e., “The Scripture being translated before in the languages of many nations, doth show that those things that were added (by Lucian and Hesychius) are false”. So St. Jerome in that place. The same Jerome elsewhere affirmeth that he, the time was, had set forth the translation of the Seventy suae linguae hominibus, i.e., for his countrymen of Dalmatia Which words not only Erasmus doth understand to purport, that St. Jerome translated the Scripture into the Dalmatian tongue, but also Sixtus Senensis, and Alphonsus a’ Castro (that we speak of no more), men not to be excepted against by them of Rome, do ingenuously confess as much. So St. Chrysostom, that lived in St. Jerome’s time, giveth evidence with him: “The doctrine of St. John,” saith he, “did not in such sort”–as the philosophers’ did–”vanish away; but the Syrians, Egyptians, Indians, Persians, Ethiopians, and infinite other nations, being barbarous people, translated it into their (mother) tongue, and have learned to be (true) philosophers”–he meaneth “Christians”. To this may be added Theodoret, as next unto him, both for antiquity and for learning. His words be these: “Every country that is under the sun, is full of these words (of the apostles and prophets) and the Hebrew tongue (he meaneth the Scriptures in the Hebrew tongue) is turned not only into the language of the Grecians, but also of the Romans, and Egyptians, and Persians, and Indians, and Armenians, and Scythians, and Sauromatians, and briefly into all the languages that any nation useth”. So he. In like manner, Ulpilas is reported by Paulus Diaconus and Isidor (and before them by Sozomen) to have translated the Scriptures into the Gothic tongue, John, bishop of Sevil, by Vasseus to have turned them into Arabic, about the year of our Lord 717 ; Beda by Cistertiensis, to have turned a great part of them into Saxon; Efnard by Trithemius, to have abridged the French psalter, as Beda had done the Hebrew, about the year 800; King Alfred by the said Cistertiensis, to have turned the psalter into Saxon ; Methodius by Aventinus (printed at Ingolstadt) to have turned the Scriptures into Slavonian ; Valdo, bishop of Frising, by Beatus Rhenanus to have caused about that time the gospels to be translated into Dutch rhythm, yet extant in the Library of Corbinian ; Valdus, by divers to have turned them himself or to have gotten them turned into French, about the year 1160; Charles the Fifth of that name, surnamed the Wise, to have caused them to be turned into French, about 200 years after Valdus his time, of which translation there be many copies yet extant, as witnesseth Beroaldus. Much about that time, even in our King Richard the Second’s days, John Trevisa translated them into English, and many English Bibles in written hand are yet to be seen with divers, translated, as it is very probable, in that age. So the Syrian translation of the New Testament is in most learned men’s libraries of Widminstadius his setting forth, and the psalter in Arabic is with many of Augustinus Nebiensis’ setting forth. So Postel affirmeth, that in his travel he saw the gospels in the Ethiopian tongue; and Ambrose Thesius allegeth the psalter of the Indians, which he testifieth to have been set forth by Potken in Syrian characters. So that to have the Scriptures in the mother tongue is not a quaint conceit lately taken up, either by the Lord Cromwell in England, or by the Lord Radevile in Polony, or by the Lord Ungnadius in the emperor’s dominion, but hath been thought upon and put in practice of old, even from the first times of the conversion of any nation; no doubt because it was esteemed most profitable, to cause faith to grow in men’s hearts the sooner, and to make them to be able to say with the words of the Psalms, “As we have heard, so we have seen”.

The unwillingness of our chief adversaries that the Scriptures should be divulged in the mother tongue, etc.

Now the church of Rome would seem at the length to bear a motherly affection towards her children, and to allow them the Scriptures in their mother tongue. But indeed it is a gift, not deserving to be called a gift–an unprofitable gift ; they must first get a license in writing before they may use them, and to get that, they must approve themselves to their confessor–that is, to be such as are, if not frozen in the dregs, yet soured with the leaven of their superstition. Howbeit, it seemed too much to Clement the Eighth that there should be any license granted to have them in the vulgar tongue, and therefore he overruleth and frustrateth the grant of Pius the Fourth. So much are they afraid of the light of the Scripture (Lucifugae Scripturarum, as Tertullian speaketh) that they will not trust the people with it–no, not as it is set forth by their own sworn men; no, not with the license of their own bishops and inquisitors. Yea, so unwilling they are to communicate the Scriptures to the people’s understanding in any sort, that they are not ashamed to confess that we forced them to translate it into English against their wills. This seemeth to argue a bad cause, or a bad conscience, or both. Sure we are, that it is not he that hath good gold, that is afraid to bring it to the touchstone, but he that hath the counterfeit; neither is it the true man that shunneth the light, but the malefactor, lest his deeds should be reproved ; neither is it the plain-dealing merchant that is unwilling to have the weights, or the meteyard brought in place, but he that useth deceit. But we will let them alone for this fault, and return to translation.

The speeches and reasons, both of our brethren and of our adversaries, against this work

Many men’s mouths have been open a good while (and yet are not stopped) with speeches about the translation so long in hand, or rather perusals of translations made before, and ask what may be the reason, what the necessity of the employment. Hath the church been deceived, say they, all this while? Hath her sweet bread been mingled with leaven, here silver with dross, her wine with water, her milk with lime? (Lacte gypsum male miscetur, saith St. Ireney.) We hoped that we had been in the right way, that we had had the oracles of God delivered unto us, and that though all the world had cause to be offended and to complain, yet that we had none. Hath the nurse holden out the breast, and nothing but wind in it? Hath the bread been delivered by the Fathers of the Church, and the same proved to be lapidosus, as Seneca speaketh? What is it to handle the word of God deceitfully, if this be not? Thus certain brethren. Also the adversaries of Judah and Jerusalem, like Sanballat in Nehemiah, mock, as we hear, both the work and the workmen, saying, “What do these weak Jews, etc.? Will they make the stones whole again out of the heaps of dust which are burnt? Although they build, yet if a fox go up, he shall even break down their stony wall”. “Was their translation good before? Why do they now mend it? Was it not good? Why then was it obtruded to the people? Yea, why did the Catholics (meaning popish Romanists) always go in jeopardy, for refusing to go to hear it? Nay, if it must be translated into English, Catholics are fittest to do it. They have learning, and they know when a thing is well; they can manum de tabula.” We will answer them both briefly; and the former, being brethren, thus, with St. Jerome, Damnamus veteres? Minime, sed post priorum studia in domo Domini quod possums laboramus. That is, “Do we condemn the ancient? In no case, but after the endeavors of them that were before us, we take the best pains we can in the house of God.” As if he said, “Being provoked by the example of the learned men that lived before my time, I have thought it my duty, to assay whether my talent in the knowledge of the tongues may be profitable in any measure to God’s church, lest I should seem to laboured in them in vain, and lest I should be thought to glory in men (although ancient) above that which was in them.” Thus St. Jerome may be thought to speak.

A satisfaction to our brethren

And to the same effect say we, that we are so far off from condemning any of their labors that travailed before us in this kind, either in this land or beyond sea, either in King Henry’s time or King Edward’s (if there were any translation or correction of a translation in his time), or Queen Elizabeth’s of ever renowned memory, that we acknowledge them to have been raised up of God, for the building and furnishing of his church, and that they deserve to be had of us and of posterity in everlasting remembrance. The judgment of Aristotle is worthy and well known: “If Timotheus had not been, we had not had much sweet music; but if Phrynis (Timotheus his master) had not been, we had not had Timotheus”. Therefore blessed be they, and most honoured be their name, that break the ice, and give the onset upon that which helpeth forward to the saving of souls. Now what can be more available thereto, than to deliver God’s book unto God’s people in a tongue which they understand? Since of a hidden treasure and of a fountain that is sealed there is no profit, as Ptolemy Philadelph wrote to the rabbins or masters of the Jews, as witnesseth Epiphanius ; and as St. Augustine saith, “A man had rather be with his dog than with a stranger (whose tongue is strange unto him)” ; yet for all that, as nothing is begun and perfected at the same time, and the later thoughts are thought to be the wiser; so, if we building upon their foundation that went before us, and being holpen by their labours, do endeavor to make that better which they left so good, no man, we are sure, hath cause to mislike us; they, we persuade ourselves, if they were alive, would thank us. The vintage of Abiezer, that strake the stroke, yet the gleaning of grapes of Ephraim was not to be despised (see Judges 8:2). Joash the king of Israel did not satisfy himself till he had smitten the ground three times; and yet he offended the prophet, for giving over then. Aquila, of whom we spake before, translated the Bible as carefully and as skillfully as he could; and yet he thought good to go over it again, and then it got the credit with the Jews, to be called kata akribeian, that is, “accurately done,” as St. Jerome witnesseth. How many books of profane learning have been gone over again and again by the same translators? by others? Of one and the same book of Aristotle’s Ethics, there are extant not so few as six or seven several translations. Now if this cost may be bestowed upon the gourd, which affordeth us a little shade, and which today flourisheth, but tomorrow is cut down; what may we bestow–nay, what ought we not to bestow–upon the vine, the fruit whereof maketh glad the conscience of man, and the stem whereof abideth forever? And this is the word of God, which we translate. “What is the chaff to the wheat, saith the Lord?” Tanti vitreum, quanti verum margaritum, saith Tertullian –”if a toy of glass be of that reckoning with us, how ought we to value the true pearl?” Therefore let no man’s eye be evil, because His Majesty’s is good; neither let any be grieved, that we have a prince that seeketh the increase of the spiritual wealth of Israel. (Let Sanballats and Tobiahs do so, which therefore do bear their just reproof.) But let us rather bless God from the ground of our heart, for working this religious care in him, to have the translations of the Bible maturely considered of and examined. For by this means it cometh to pass, that whatsoever is sound already (and all is sound for substance, in one or other of our editions, and the worst of ours far better than their authentic vulgar), the same will shine as gold more brightly, being rubbed and polished; also, if anything be halting, or superfluous, or not so agreeable to the original, the same may be corrected, and the truth set in place. And what can the king command to be done, that will bring him more true honour than this? and wherein could they that have been set a work, approve their duty to the king,–yea their obedience to God, and love to his saints–more, than by yielding their service, and all that is within them, for the furnishing of the work? But besides all this, they were the principal motives of it, and therefore ought least to quarrel it; for the very historical truth is, that upon the importunate petitions of the Puritans, at His Majesty’s coming to this crown, the conference at Hampton Court having been appointed for hearing their complaints, when by force of reason they were put from all other grounds, they had recourse at the last, to this shift, that they could not with good conscience subscribe to the communion book, since it maintained the Bible as it was there translated, which was (as they said) a most corrupted translation. And although this was judged to be but a very poor and empty shift, yet even hereupon did His Majesty begin to bethink himself of the good that might ensue by a new translation, and presently after gave order for this translation which is now presented unto thee. Thus much to satisfy our scrupulous brethren.

An answer to the imputations of our adversaries

Now to the latter we answer that we do not deny–nay, we affirm and avow–that the very meanest translation of the Bible in English, set forth by men of our profession, (for we have seen none of theirs of the whole Bible as yet) containeth the word of God, nay, is the word of God. As the king’s speech, which he uttered in Parliament, being translated into French, Dutch, Italian, and Latin, is still the king’s speech, though it be not interpreted by every translator with the like grace, nor peradventure so fitly for phrase, nor so expressly for sense, everywhere. For it is confessed that things are to take their denomination of the greater part; and a natural man could say, Verum ubi multa nitent in carmine, non ego paucis offendor maculis, etc. –”a man may be counted a virtuous man, though he have made many slips in his life” (else there were none virtuous, for in many things we offend all) ; also a comely man and lovely, though he have some warts upon his hand–yea, not only freckles upon his face, but also scars. No cause therefore why the word translated should be denied to be the word, or forbidden to be current, notwithstanding that some imperfections and blemishes may be noted in the setting forth of it. For whatever was perfect under the sun, where apostles or apostolic men–that is, men endued with an extraordinary measure of God’s spirit, and privileged with the privilege of infallibility–had not their hand? The Romanists therefore, in refusing to hear, and daring to burn the word translated, did no less than despite the Spirit of grace, from whom originally it proceeded, and whose sense and meaning, as well as man’s weakness would enable, it did express. Judge by an example or two. Plutarch writeth, that after that Rome had been burnt by the Gauls, they fell soon to build it again; but doing it in haste, they did not cast the streets, nor proportion the houses in such comely fashion, as had been most sightly and convenient. Was Catiline therefore an honest man, or a good patriot, that sought to bring it to a combustion? or Nero a good prince, that did indeed set it on fire? So by the story of Ezra and the prophecy of Haggai it may be gathered, that the temple built by Zerubbabel after the return from Babylon, was by no means to be compared to the former built by Solomon (for they that remembered the former wept when they considered the latter) ; notwithstanding, might this latter either have been abhorred and forsaken by the Jews, or profaned by the Greeks? The like we are to think of translations. The translation of the Seventy dissenteth from the original in many places; neither doth it come near it, for perspicuity, gravity, majesty; yet which of the apostles did condemn it? Condemn it? Nay, they used it (as it is apparent, and as St. Jerome and most learned men do confess), which they would not have done, nor by their example of using it so grace and commend it to the church, if it had been unworthy the appellation and name of the word of God. And whereas they urge for their second defence of their vilifying and abusing of the English Bibles, or some pieces thereof which they meet with, for that “heretics,” forsooth, were the authors of the translations (“heretics” they call us by the same right that they call themselves “Catholics,” both being wrong), we marvel what divinity taught them so. We are sure Tertullian was of another mind: Ex personis probamus fidem, an ex fide personas? –”Do we try men’s faith by their persons? We should try their persons by their faith.” Also St. Augustine was of another mind, for he lighting upon certain rules made by Tychonius, a Donatist, for the better understanding of the word, was not ashamed to make use of them–yea, to insert them into his own book, with giving commendation to them so far forth as they were worthy to be commended, as is to be seen in St. Augustine’s third book De doctrina Christiana. To be short, Origen, and the whole church of God for certain hundred years, were of another mind, for they were so far from treading under foot (much more from burning) the translation of Aquila, a proselyte (that is, one that had turned Jew)–of Symmachus, and Theodotion, both Ebionites (that is, most vile heretics)–that they joined them together with the Hebrew original, and the translation of the Seventy (as hath been before signified out of Epiphanius) and set them forth openly to be considered of and perused by all. But we weary the unlearned, who need not know so much, and trouble the learned, who know it already.

Yet before we end, we must answer a third cavil and objection of theirs against us, for altering and amending our translations so oft; wherein truly they deal hardly and strangely with us. For to whomever was it imputed for a fault (by such as were wise) to go over that which he had done, and to amend it where he saw cause? St. Augustine was not afraid to exhort St. Jerome to a palinodia or recantation, and doth even glory that he seeth his infirmities. If we be sons of the truth, we must consider what it speaketh, and trample upon our own credit, yea, and upon other men’s too, if either be any way an hindrance to it. This to the cause. Then to the persons we say, that of all men they ought to be most silent in this case. For what varieties have they, and what alterations have they made, not only of their service books, portasses, and breviaries, but also of their Latin translation? The service book supposed to be made by St. Ambrose (Officium Ambrosianum) was a great while in special use and request, but Pope Hadrian calling a council with the aid of Charles the emperor, abolished it–yea, burned it–and commanded the service book of St. Gregory universally to be used. Well, Officium Gregorianum gets by this means to be in credit, but doth it continue without change or altering? No, the very Roman service was of two fashions, the “new” fashion, and the “old”–the one used in one church, the other in another–, as is to be seen in Pamelius, a Romanist, his preface before Micrologus. The same Pamelius reporteth out Radulphus de Rivo, that about the year of our Lord 1277, Pope Nicolas the Third removed out of the churches of Rome the more ancient books (of service), and brought into use the missals of the Friars Minorites, and commanded them to be observed there; insomuch that about an hundred years after, when the above-named Radulphus happened to be at Rome, he found all the books to be new (of the new stamp). Neither were there this chopping and changing in the more ancient times only, but also of late: Pius Quintus himself confesseth, that every bishopric almost had a peculiar kind of service, most unlike to that which others had; which moved him to abolish all other breviaries, though never so ancient, and privileged and published by bishops in their dioceses, and to establish and ratify that only which was of his own setting forth, in the year 1568. Now when the father of their church, who gladly would heal the sore of the daughter of his people softly and slightly and make the best of it, findeth so great fault with them for their odds and jarring, we hope the children have no great cause to vaunt of their uniformity. But the difference that appeareth between our translations, and our often correcting of them, is the thing that we are specially charged with; let us see therefore whether they themselves be without fault this way (if it be to be counted a fault, to correct), and whether they be fit men to throw stones at us. O tandem major parcas insane minori–”they that are less sound themselves, ought not to object infirmities to others”. If we should tell them that Valla, Stapulensis, Erasmus, and Vives found fault with their vulgar translation, and consequently wished the same to be mended, or a new one to be made, they would answer peradventure, that we produced their enemies for witnesses against them; albeit, they were in no other sort enemies than as St. Paul was to the Galatians, for telling them the truth, and it were to be wished that they had dared to tell it them plainlier and oftener. But what will they say to this, that Pope Leo the Tenth allowed Erasmus’ translation of the New Testament, so much different from the vulgar, by his apostolic letter and bull; that the same Leo exhorted Pagnin to translate the whole Bible, and bare whatsoever charges was necessary for the work? Surely, as the apostle reasoneth to the Hebrews, that “if the former law and testament had been sufficient, there had been no need of the latter”, so we may say, that if the old vulgar had been at all points allowable, to small purpose had labour and charges been undergone, about framing of a new. If they say, it was one pope’s private opinion, and that he consulted only himself, then we are able to go further with them, and to aver that more of their chief men of all sorts, even their own Trent champions Paiva and Vega, and their own inquisitors, Hieronymus ab Oleastro, and their own Bishop Isidorus Clarius, and their own Cardinal Thomas a Vio Caietan, do either make new translations themselves, or follow new ones of other men’s making, or note the vulgar interpreter for halting; none of them fear to dissent from him, nor yet to except against him. And call they this an uniform tenor of text and judgment about the text, so many of their worthies disclaiming the now received conceit? Nay, we will yet come nearer the quick: doth not their Paris edition differ from the Lovaine, and Hentenius his from them both, and yet all of them allowed by authority? Nay, doth not Sixtus Quintus confess, that certain Catholics (he meaneth certain of his own side) were in such an humor of translating the Scriptures into Latin, that Satan taking occasion by them, though they thought of no such matter, did strive what he could, out of so uncertain and manifold a variety of translations, so to mingle all things that nothing might seem to be left certain and firm in them, etc.? Nay, further, did not the same Sixtus ordain by an inviolable decree, and that with the counsel and consent of his cardinals, that the Latin edition of the Old and New Testament, which the Council of Trent would have to be authentic, is the same without controversy which he then set forth, being diligently corrected and printed in the printing house of Vatican? Thus Sixtus in his preface before his Bible. And yet Clement the Eighth, his immediate successor, published another edition of the Bible, containing in it infinite differences from that of Sixtus (and many of them weighty and material), and yet this must be authentic by all means. What is to have the faith of our glorious Lord Jesus Christ with “yea and nay,” if this be not? Again, what is sweet harmony and consent, if this be? Therefore, as Demaratus of Corinth advised a great king, before he talked of the dissensions among the Grecians, to compose his domestic broils (for at that time his queen and his son and heir were at deadly feud with him), so all the while that our adversaries do make so many and so various editions themselves, and do jar so much about the worth and authority of them, they can with no show of equity challenge us for changing and correcting.

The purpose of the translators with their number, furniture, care, etc.

But it is high time to leave them, and to show in brief what we proposed to ourselves, and what course we held in this our perusal and survey of the Bible. Truly, good Christian reader, we never thought from the beginning, that we should need to make a new translation, nor yet to make of a bad one a good one (for then the imputation of Sixtus had been true in some sort, that our people had been fed with gall of dragons instead of wine, with whey instead of milk); but to make a good one better, or out of many good ones, one principal good one, not justly to be excepted against. That hath been our endeavor, that our mark. To that purpose, there were many chosen that were greater in other men’s eyes than in their own, and that sought the truth rather than their own praise. Again, they came or were thought to come to the work, not exercendi causa (as one saith) but exercitati, that is, “learned, not to learn.” For the chief overseer and ergodiwkthV under his Majesty, to whom not only we, but also our whole church was much bound, knew by his wisdom, which thing also Nazianzen taught so long ago, that it is a preposterous order to teach first and to learn after, yea that to en piqw keramian manqanein, “to learn and practice together,” is neither commendable for the workman, nor safe for the work. Therefore such were thought upon as could say modestly with St. Jerome, Et Hebreaeum sermonem ex parte didicimus, et in Latino pene ab ipsis incunabulis, etc., detriti sumus.–”Both we have learned the Hebrew tongue in part, and in the Latin we have been exercised almost from our very cradle.” (St. Jerome maketh no mention of the Greek tongue, wherein yet he did excel, because he translated not the Old Testament out of Greek, but out of Hebrew.) And in what sort did these assemble? In the trust of their own knowledge, or of their sharpness of wit, or deepness of judgment, as it were in an arm of flesh? At no hand. They trusted in him that hath the key of David, opening and no man shutting; they prayed to the Lord, the Father of our Lord, to the effect that St. Augustine did: “O let thy Scriptures be my pure Scriptures be my pure delight; let me not be deceived in them, neither let me deceive by them”. In this confidence and with this devotion did they assemble together; not too many, lest one should trouble another, and yet many, lest many things haply might escape them. If you ask what they had before them, truly it was the Hebrew text of the Old Testament, the Greek of the New. These are the two golden pipes, or rather conduits, wherethrough the olive branches empty themselves into the gold. St. Augustine calleth them precedent, or original tongues ; St. Jerome, fountains. The same St. Jerome affirmeth, and Gratian hath not spared to put it into his decree, that “as the credit of the old books (he meaneth of the Old Testament) is to be tried by the Hebrew volumes, so of the New by the Greek tongue (he meaneth by the original Greek). If truth be tried by these tongues, then whence should a translation be made, but out of them? These tongues therefore–the Scriptures, we say, in those tongues–we set before us to translate, being the tongues wherein God was pleased to speak to His church by His prophets and apostles. Neither did we run over the work with that posting haste that the Septuagint did, if that be true which is reported of them, that they finished it in seventy-two days ; neither were we barred or hindered from going over it again, having once done it, like St. Jerome–if that be true which himself reporteth, that he could no sooner write anything but presently it was caught from him and published, and he could not have leave to mend it –; neither, to be short, were we the first that fell in hand with translating the Scripture into English, and consequently destitute of former helps, as it is written of Origen, that he was the first in a manner that put his hand to write commentaries upon the Scriptures, and therefore no marvel, if he overshot himself many times. None of these things; the work hath not been huddled up in seventy-two days, but hath cost the workmen, as light as it seemeth, the pains of twice seven times seventy-two days and more. Matters of such weight and consequence are to be speeded with maturity, for in a business of moment a man feareth not the blame of convenient slackness. Neither did we think much to consult the translators or commentators, Chaldee, Hebrew, Syrian, Greek or Latin–no, nor the Spanish, French, Italian, or Dutch. Neither did we disdain to revise that which we had done, and to bring back to the anvil that which we had hammered: but having and using as great helps as were needful, and fearing no reproach for slowness, nor coveting praise for expedition, we have at length, through the good hand of the Lord upon us, brought the work to that pass that you see.

Reasons moving us to set diversity of senses in the margin, where there is great probability for each

Some peradventure would have no variety of senses to be set in the margin, lest the authority of the Scriptures for deciding of controversies by that show of uncertainty should somewhat be shaken. But we hold their judgment not to be so sound in this point. For though “whatsoever things are necessary are manifest,” as St. Chrysostom saith, and as St. Augustine, “In those things that are plainly set down in the Scriptures, all such matters are found that concern faith, hope, and charity” ; yet for all that it cannot be dissembled, that partly to exercise and whet our wits, partly to wean the curious from the loathing of them for their everywhere plainness, partly also to stir up our devotion to crave the assistance of God’s Spirit by prayer, and lastly, that we might be forward to seek aid of our brethren by conference, and never scorn those that be not in all respects so complete as they should be, being to seek in many things ourselves, it hath pleased God in His divine providence, here and there to scatter words and sentences of that difficulty and doubtfulness, not in doctrinal points that concern salvation (for in such it hath been vouched that the Scriptures are plain), but in matters of less moment, that fearfulness would better beseem us than confidence, and if we will resolve upon modesty with St. Augustine (though not in this same case altogether, yet upon the same ground), Melius est dubitare de occultis, quam litigare de incertis, –”it is better to make doubt of those things which are secret, than to strive about those things that are uncertain.” There be many words in the Scriptures which be never found there but once (having neither brother nor neighbor, as the Hebrews speak), so that we cannot be holpen by conference of places. Again, there be many rare names of certain birds, beasts and precious stones, etc., concerning which the Hebrews themselves are so divided among themselves for judgment, that they may seem to have defined this or that rather because they would say something than because they were sure of that which they said, as St. Jerome somewhere saith of the Septuagint. Now in such a case, doth not a margin do well to admonish the reader to seek further, and not to conclude or dogmatize upon this or that peremptorily? For as it is a fault of incredulity, to doubt of those things that are evident, so to determine of such things as the Spirit of God hath left (even in the judgment of the judicious) questionable, can be no less than presumption. Therefore as St. Augustine saith, that variety of translations is profitable for the finding out of the sense of the Scriptures ; so diversity of signification and sense in the margin, where the text is not so clear, must needs do good–yea, is necessary, as we are persuaded. We know that Sixtus Quintus expressly forbiddeth that any variety of readings of their vulgar edition should be put in the margin –which though it be not altogether the same thing to that we have in hand, yet it looketh that way–, but we think he hath not all of his own side his favorers for this conceit. They that are wise had rather have their judgments at liberty in differences of readings, than to be captivated to one, when it may be the other. If they were sure that their high priest had all laws shut up in his breast, as Paul the Second bragged, and that he were as free from error by special privilege as the dictators of Rome were made by law inviolable, it were another matter; then his word were an oracle, his opinion a decision. But the eyes of the world are now open, God be thanked, and have been a great while. They find that he is subject to the same affections and infirmities that others be, that his skin is penetrable; and therefore so much as he proveth, not as much as he claimeth, they grant and embrace.

Reasons inducing us not to stand curiously upon an identity of phrasing

Another thing we think good to admonish thee of, gentle reader: that we have not tied ourselves to an uniformity of phrasing, or to an identity of words, as some peradventure would wish that we had done, because they observe that some learned men somewhere have been as exact as they could that way. Truly, that we might not vary from the sense of that which we had translated before, if the word signified the same thing in both places (for there be some words that be not of the same sense everywhere), we were especially careful, and made a conscience according to our duty. But that we should express the same notion in the same particular word, as for example, if we translate the Hebrew or Greek word once by purpose, never to call it intent; if one where journeying, never travelling; if one where think, never suppose; if one where pain, never ache; if one where joy, never gladness, etc–thus, to mince the matter, we thought to savor more of curiosity than wisdom, and that rather it would breed scorn in the atheist than bring profit to the godly reader. For is the kingdom of God become words or syllables? Why should we be in bondage to them if we may be free, use one precisely when we may use another no less fit, as commodiously? A godly Father in the Primitive time showed himself greatly moved, that one of newfangleness called krabbaton, “skimpouV”, though the difference be little or none; and another reporteth that he was much abused for turning “cucurbita” (to which reading the people had been used) into “hedera”. Now if this happen in better times, and upon so small occasions, we might justly fear hard censure, if generally we should make verbal and unnecessary changings. We might also be charged (by scoffers) with some unequal dealing towards a great number of good English words. For as it is written of a certain great philosopher, that he should say, that those logs were happy that were made images to be worshipped, for their fellows, as good as they, lay for blocks behind the fire; so if we should say, as it were, unto certain words, “Stand up higher; have a place in the Bible always,” and to others of like quality, “Get ye hence; be banished forever,” we might be taxed peradventure with St. James his words, namely, “To be partial in ourselves, and judges of evil thoughts.” Add hereunto, that niceness in words was always counted the next step to trifling, and so was to be curious about names, too; also, that we cannot follow a better pattern for elocution than God Himself; therefore, He using divers words, in His holy writ, and indifferently for one thing in nature, we, if we will not be superstitious, may use the same liberty in our English versions out of Hebrew and Greek, for that copy or store that He hath given us. Lastly, we have on the one side avoided the scrupulosity of the Puritans, who leave the old ecclesiastical words and betake them to other, as when they put washing for baptism, and congregation instead of church; as also on the other side we have shunned the obscurity of the Papists, in their azimes, tunic, rational, holocausts, praepuce, pasche, and a number of such like, whereof their late translation is full–and that of purpose to darken the sense, that since they must needs translate the Bible, yet by the language thereof, it may be kept from being understood. But we desire that the Scripture may speak like itself, as in the language of Canaan, that it may be understood even of the very vulgar.

Many other things we might give thee warning of, gentle reader, if we had not exceeded the measure of a preface already. It remaineth that we commend thee to God, and to the Spirit of His grace, which is able to build further than we can ask or think. He removeth the scales from our eyes, the veil from our hearts, opening our wits that we may understand His word, enlarging our hearts; yea, correcting our affections, that we may love it to the end. Ye are brought unto fountains of living water which ye digged not; do not cast earth into them with the Philistines, neither prefer broken pits before them with the wicked Jews. Others have laboured, and you may enter into their labours. O receive not so great things in vain, O despise not so great salvation! Be not like swine to tread under foot so precious things, neither yet like dogs to tear and abuse holy things. Say not to our Saviour with the Gergesites, “Depart out of our coasts” ; neither yet with Esau sell your birthright for a mess of pottage. If light be come into the world, love not darkness more than light; if food, if clothing be offered, go not naked, starve not yourselves. Remember the advice of Nazianzene, “It is a grievous thing (or dangerous) to neglect a great fair, and to seek to make markets afterwards” ; also the encouragement of St. Chrysostom, “It is altogether impossible, that he that is sober (and watchful) should at any time be neglected” ; lastly, the admonition and menacing of St. Augustine, “They that despise God’s will inviting them, shall feel God’s will taking vengeance of them”. It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God ; but a blessed thing it is, and will bring us to everlasting blessedness in the end, when God speaketh unto us, to hearken; when He setteth His word before us, to read it; when He stretcheth out His hand and calleth, to answer, “Here am I! here we are to do thy will, O God.” The Lord work a care and conscience in us to know Him and serve Him, that we may be acknowledged of Him at the appearing of our Lord Jesus Christ, to whom, with the Holy Ghost, be all praise and thanksgiving. Amen.

TO THE MOST HIGH AND MIGHTY PRINCE
JAMES,
[BY THE GRACE OF GOD,]
KING OF GREAT BRITAIN, FRANCE, AND IRELAND,
DEFENDER OF THE FAITH, &c.

The Translators of the Bible wish Grace, Mercy, and Peace,
through JESUS CHRIST our Lord.

GREAT and manifold were the blessings, most dread Sovereign, which Almighty God, the Father of all mercies, bestowed upon us the people of [England], when first he sent Your Majesty’s Royal Person to rule and reign over us. For whereas it was the expectation of many, who wished not well unto our [Sion], that upon the setting of that bright [Occidental Star], Queen [Elizabeth] of most happy memory, some thick and palpable clouds of darkness would so have overshadowed this Land, that men should have been in doubt which way they were to walk; and that it should hardly be known, who was to direct the unsettled State; the appearance of Your Majesty, as of the [Sun] in his strength, instantly dispelled those supposed and surmised mists, and gave unto all that were well affected exceeding cause of comfort; especially when we beheld the Government established in Your Highness and Your hopeful Seed, by an undoubted Title, and this also accompanied with peace and tranquility at home and abroad.

But among all our joys, there was no one that more filled our hearts, than the blessed continuance of the preaching of God’s sacred Word among us; which is that inestimable treasure, which excelleth all the riches of earth; because the fruit thereof extendeth itself, not only to the time spent in this transitory world, but directeth and disposeth men unto that eternal happiness which is above in heaven.

Then not to suffer this to fall to the ground, but rather to take it up, and to continue it in that state, wherein the famous Predecessor of Your Highness did leave it: nay, to go forward with the confidence and resolution of a Man in maintaining the truth of Christ, and propagating it far and near, is that whi

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ch hath so bound and firmly knit the hearts of all Your Majesty’s loyal and religious people unto You, that Your very name is precious among them: their eye doth behold You with comfort, and they bless You in their hearts, as that sanctified Person, who, under God, is the immediate Author of their true happiness. And this their contentment doth not diminish or decay, but every day increaseth and taketh strength, when they observe, that the zeal of Your Majesty toward the house of God doth not slack or go backward, but is more and more kindled, manifesting itself abroad in the farthest parts of [Christendom], by writing in defence of the Truth, (which hath given such a blow unto that man of Sin, as will not be healed,) and every day at home, by religious and learned discourse, by frequenting the house of God, by hearing the Word preached, by cherishing the Teachers thereof, by caring for the Church, as a most tender and loving nursing Father.

There are infinite arguments of this right Christian and religious affection in Your Majesty; but none is more forcible to declare it to others than the vehement and perpetuated desire of accomplishing and publishing of this work, which now with all humility we present unto Your Majesty. For when Your Highness had once out of deep judgment apprehended how convenient it was, that out of the Original Sacred Tongues, together with comparing of the labours, both in our own, and other foreign Languages, of many worthy men who went before us, there should be one more exact Translation of the holy Scriptures into the [English Tongue]; Your Majesty did never desist to urge and to excite those to whom it was commended, that the work might be hastened, and that the business might be expedited in so decent a manner, as a matter of such importance might justly require.

And now at last, by the mercy of God, and the continuance of our labours, it being brought unto such a conclusion, as that we have great hopes that the Church of [England] shall reap good fruit thereby; we hold it our duty to offer it to Your Majesty, not only as to our King and Sovereign, but as to the principal Mover and Author of the work: humbly craving of Your most Sacred Majesty, that since things of this quality have ever been subject to the censures of illmeaning and discontented persons, it may receive approbation and patronage from so learned and judicious a Prince as Your Highness is, whose allowance and acceptance of our labours shall more honour and encourage us, than all the calumniations and hard interpretations of other men shall dismay us. So that if, on the one side, we shall be traduced by Popish Persons at home or abroad, who therefore will malign us, because we are poor instruments to make God’s holy Truth to be yet more and more known unto the people, whom they desire still to keep in ignorance and darkness; or if, on the other side, we shall be maligned by selfconceited Brethren, who run their own ways, and give liking unto nothing, but what is framed by themselves, and hammered on their anvil; we may rest secure, supported within by the truth and innocency of a good conscience, having walked the ways of simplicity and integrity, as before the Lord; and sustained without by the powerful protection of Your Majesty’s grace and favour, which will ever give countenance to honest and Christian endeavors against bitter censures and uncharitable imputations.

The Lord of heaven and earth bless Your Majesty with many and happy days, that, as his heavenly hand hath enriched Your Highness with many singular and extraordinary graces, so You may be the wonder of the world in this latter age for happiness and true felicity, to the honour of that great GOD, and the good of his Church, through Jesus Christ our Lord and only Saviour.

THE NAMES AND ORDER OF THE BOOKS OF THE HOLY BIBLE WITH THE NUMBER OF THEIR CHAPTERS

THE BOOKS OF THE OLD TESTAMENT

Genesis 50
Exodus 40
Leviticus 27
Numbers 36
Deuteronomy 34
Joshua 24
Judges 21
Ruth 4
1 Samuel 31
2 Samuel 24
1 Kings 22
2 Kings 25
1 Chronicles 29
2 Chronicles 36
Ezra 10
Nehemiah 13
Esther 10
Job 42
Psalms 150
Proverbs 31
Ecclesiastes 8
Song of Songs 12
Isaiah 66
Jeremiah 52
Lamentations 5
Ezekiel 48
Daniel 12
Hosea 14
Joel 3
Amos 9
Obadiah 1
Jonah 4
Micah 7
Nahum 3
Habakkuk 3
Zephaniah 3
Haggai 2
Zechariah 14
Malachi 4

THE BOOKS OF THE NEW TESTAMENT

Matthew 28
Mark 16
Luke 24
John 21
Acts 28
Romans 16
1 Corinthians 16
2 Corinthians 13
Galatians 6
Ephesians 6
Philippians 4
Colossians 4
1 Thessalonians 5
2 Thessalonians 3
1 Timothy 6
2 Timothy 4
Titus 3
Philemon 1
Hebrews 13
James 5
1 Peter 5
2 Peter 3
1 John 5
2 John 1
3 John 1
Jude 1
Revelation 22

THE FIRST BOOK OF MOSES, CALLED GENESIS

CHAPTER 1
1 In the beginning God created the heaven and the earth.
2 And the earth was without form, and void; and darkness [was] upon the face of the deep. And the Spirit of God moved upon the face of the waters.
3 And God said, Let there be light: and there was light.
4 And God saw the light, that [it was] good: and God divided the light from the darkness.
5 And God called the light Day, and the darkness he called Night. And the evening and the morning were the first day.
6 # And God said, Let there be a firmament in the midst of the waters, and let it divide the waters from the waters.
7 And God made the firmament, and divided the waters which [were] under the firmament from the waters which [were] above the firmament: and it was so.
8 And God called the firmament Heaven. And the evening and the morning were the second day.
9 # And God said, Let the waters under the heaven be gathered together unto one place, and let the dry [land] appear: and it was so.
10 And God called the dry [land] Earth; and the gathering together of the waters called he Seas: and God saw that [it was] good.
11 And God said, Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, [and] the fruit tree yielding fruit after his kind, whose seed [is] in itself, upon the earth: and it was so.
12 And the earth brought forth grass, [and] herb yielding seed after his kind, and the tree yielding fruit, whose seed [was] in itself, after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
13 And the evening and the morning were the third day.
14 # And God said, Let there be lights in the firmament of the heaven to divide the day from the night; and let them be for signs, and for seasons, and for days, and years:
15 And let them be for lights in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth: and it was so.
16 And God made two great lights; the greater light to rule the day, and the lesser light to rule the night: [he made] the stars also.
17 And God set them in the firmament of the heaven to give light upon the earth,
18 And to rule over the day and over the night, and to divide the light from the darkness: and God saw that [it was] good.
19 And the evening and the morning were the fourth day.
20 And God said, Let the waters bring forth abundantly the moving creature that hath life, and fowl [that] may fly above the earth in the open firmament of heaven.
21 And God created great whales, and every living creature that moveth, which the waters brought forth abundantly, after their kind, and every winged fowl after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
22 And God blessed them, saying, Be fruitful, and multiply, and fill the waters in the seas, and let fowl multiply in the earth.
23 And the evening and the morning were the fifth day.
24 # And God said, Let the earth bring forth the living creature after his kind, cattle, and creeping thing, and beast of the earth after his kind: and it was so.
25 And God made the beast of the earth after his kind, and cattle after their kind, and every thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind: and God saw that [it was] good.
26 # And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth.
27 So God created man in his [own] image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them.
28 And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth.
29 # And God said, Behold, I have given you every herb bearing seed, which [is] upon the face of all the earth, and every tree, in the which [is] the fruit of a tree yielding seed; to you it shall be for meat.
30 And to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein [there is] life, [I have given] every green herb for meat: and it was so.
31 And God saw every thing that he had made, and, behold, [it was] very good. And the evening and the morning were the sixth day.

CHAPTER 2
1 Thus the heavens and the earth were finished, and all the host of them.
2 And on the seventh day God ended his work which he had made; and he rested on the seventh day from all his work which he had made.
3 And God blessed the seventh day, and sanctified it: because that in it he had rested from all his work which God created and made.
4 # These [are] the generations of the heavens and of the earth when they were created, in the day that the LORD God made the earth and the heavens,
5 And every plant of the field before it was in the earth, and every herb of the field before it grew: for the LORD God had not caused it to rain upon the earth, and [there was] not a man to till the ground.
6 But there went up a mist from the earth, and watered the whole face of the ground.
7 And the LORD God formed man [of] the dust of the ground, and breathed into his nostrils the breath of life; and man became a living soul.
8 # And the LORD God planted a garden eastward in Eden; and there he put the man whom he had formed.
9 And out of the ground made the LORD God to grow every tree that is pleasant to the sight, and good for food; the tree of life also in the midst of the garden, and the tree of knowledge of good and evil.
10 And a river went out of Eden to water the garden; and from thence it was parted, and became into four heads.
11 The name of the first [is] Pison: that [is] it which compasseth the whole land of Havilah, where [there is] gold;
12 And the gold of that land [is] good: there [is] bdellium and the onyx stone.
13 And the name of the second river [is] Gihon: the same [is] it that compasseth the whole land of Ethiopia.
14 And the name of the third river [is] Hiddekel: that [is] it which goeth toward the east of Assyria. And the fourth river [is] Euphrates.
15 And the LORD God took the man, and put him into the garden of Eden to dress it and to keep it.
16 And the LORD God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat:
17 But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.
18 # And the LORD God said, [It is] not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.
19 And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought [them] unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that [was] the name thereof.
20 And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him.
21 And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof;
22 And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man.
23 And Adam said, This [is] now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.
25 And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.

CHAPTER 3
1 Now the serpent was more subtil than any beast of the field which the LORD God had made. And he said unto the woman, Yea, hath God said, Ye shall not eat of every tree of the garden?
2 And the woman said unto the serpent, We may eat of the fruit of the trees of the garden:
3 But of the fruit of the tree which [is] in the midst of the garden, God hath said, Ye shall not eat of it, neither shall ye touch it, lest ye die.
4 And the serpent said unto the woman, Ye shall not surely die:
5 For God doth know that in the day ye eat thereof, then your eyes shall be opened, and ye shall be as gods, knowing good and evil.
6 And when the woman saw that the tree [was] good for food, and that it [was] pleasant to the eyes, and a tree to be desired to make [one] wise, she took of the fruit thereof, and did eat, and gave also unto her husband with her; and he did eat.
7 And the eyes of them both were opened, and they knew that they [were] naked; and they sewed fig leaves together, and made themselves aprons.
8 And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.
9 And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where [art] thou?
10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I [was] naked; and I hid myself.
11 And he said, Who told thee that thou [wast] naked? Hast thou eaten of the tree, whereof I commanded thee that thou shouldest not eat?
12 And the man said, The woman whom thou gavest [to be] with me, she gave me of the tree, and I did eat.
13 And the LORD God said unto the woman, What [is] this [that] thou hast done? And the woman said, The serpent beguiled me, and I did eat.
14 And the LORD God said unto the serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou [art] cursed above all cattle, and above every beast of the field; upon thy belly shalt thou go, and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:
15 And I will put enmity between thee and the woman, and between thy seed and her seed; it shall bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heel.
16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorrow and thy conception; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and thy desire [shall be] to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee.
17 And unto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened unto the voice of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commanded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eat of it: cursed [is] the ground for thy sake; in sorrow shalt thou eat [of] it all the days of thy life;
18 Thorns also and thistles shall it bring forth to thee; and thou shalt eat the herb of the field;
19 In the sweat of thy face shalt thou eat bread, till thou return unto the ground; for out of it wast thou taken: for dust thou [art], and unto dust shalt thou return.
20 And Adam called his wife’s name Eve; because she was the mother of all living.
21 Unto Adam also and to his wife did the LORD God make coats of skins, and clothed them.
22 # And the LORD God said, Behold, the man is become as one of us, to know good and evil: and now, lest he put forth his hand, and take also of the tree of life, and eat, and live for ever:
23 Therefore the LORD God sent him forth from the garden of Eden, to till the ground from whence he was taken.
24 So he drove out the man; and he placed at the east of the garden of Eden Cherubims, and a flaming sword which turned every way, to keep the way of the tree of life.

CHAPTER 4
1 And Adam knew Eve his wife; and she conceived, and bare Cain, and said, I have gotten a man from the LORD.
2 And she again bare his brother Abel. And Abel was a keeper of sheep, but Cain was a tiller of the ground.
3 And in process of time it came to pass, that Cain brought of the fruit of the ground an offering unto the LORD.
4 And Abel, he also brought of the firstlings of his flock and of the fat thereof. And the LORD had respect unto Abel and to his offering:
5 But unto Cain and to his offering he had not respect. And Cain was very wroth, and his countenance fell.
6 And the LORD said unto Cain, Why art thou wroth? and why is thy countenance fallen?
7 If thou doest well, shalt thou not be accepted? and if thou doest not well, sin lieth at the door. And unto thee [shall be] his desire, and thou shalt rule over him.
8 And Cain talked with Abel his brother: and it came to pass, when they were in the field, that Cain rose up against Abel his brother, and slew him.
9 # And the LORD said unto Cain, Where [is] Abel thy brother? And he said, I know not: [Am] I my brother’s keeper?
10 And he said, What hast thou done? the voice of thy brother’s blood crieth unto me from the ground.
11 And now [art] thou cursed from the earth, which hath opened her mouth to receive thy brother’s blood from thy hand;
12 When thou tillest the ground, it shall not henceforth yield unto thee her strength; a fugitive and a vagabond shalt thou be in the earth.
13 And Cain said unto the LORD, My punishment [is] greater than I can bear.
14 Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, [that] every one that findeth me shall slay me.
15 And the LORD said unto him, Therefore whosoever slayeth Cain, vengeance shall be taken on him sevenfold. And the LORD set a mark upon Cain, lest any finding him should kill him.
16 # And Cain went out from the presence of the LORD, and dwelt in the land of Nod, on the east of Eden.
17 And Cain knew his wife; and she conceived, and bare Enoch: and he builded a city, and called the name of the city, after the name of his son, Enoch.
18 And unto Enoch was born Irad: and Irad begat Mehujael: and Mehujael begat Methusael: and Methusael begat Lamech.
19 # And Lamech took unto him two wives: the name of the one [was] Adah, and the name of the other Zillah.
20 And Adah bare Jabal: he was the father of such as dwell in tents, and [of such as have] cattle.
21 And his brother’s name [was] Jubal: he was the father of all such as handle the harp and organ.
22 And Zillah, she also bare Tubal-cain, an instructer of every artificer in brass and iron: and the sister of Tubal-cain [was] Naamah.
23 And Lamech said unto his wives, Adah and Zillah, Hear my voice; ye wives of Lamech, hearken unto my speech: for I have slain a man to my wounding, and a young man to my hurt.
24 If Cain shall be avenged sevenfold, truly Lamech seventy and sevenfold.
25 # And Adam knew his wife again; and she bare a son, and called his name Seth: For God, [said she], hath appointed me another seed instead of Abel, whom Cain slew.
26 And to Seth, to him also there was born a son; and he called his name Enos: then began men to call upon the name of the LORD.

CHAPTER 5
1 This [is] the book of the generations of Adam. In the day that God created man, in the likeness of God made he him;
2 Male and female created he them; and blessed them, and called their name Adam, in the day when they were created.
3 # And Adam lived an hundred and thirty years, and begat [a son] in his own likeness, after his image; and called his name Seth:
4 And the days of Adam after he had begotten Seth were eight hundred years: and he begat sons and daughters:
5 And all the days that Adam lived were nine hundred and thirty years: and he died.
6 And Seth lived an hundred and five years, and begat Enos:
7 And Seth lived after he begat Enos eight hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters:
8 And all the days of Seth were nine hundred and twelve years: and he died.
9 # And Enos lived ninety years, and begat Cainan:
10 And Enos lived after he begat Cainan eight hundred and fifteen years, and begat sons and daughters:
11 And all the days of Enos were nine hundred and five years: and he died.
12 # And Cainan lived seventy years, and begat Mahalaleel:
13 And Cainan lived after he begat Mahalaleel eight hundred and forty years, and begat sons and daughters:
14 And all the days of Cainan were nine hundred and ten years: and he died.
15 # And Mahalaleel lived sixty and five years, and begat Jared:
16 And Mahalaleel lived after he begat Jared eight hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters:
17 And all the days of Mahalaleel were eight hundred ninety and five years: and he died.
18 # And Jared lived an hundred sixty and two years, and he begat Enoch:
19 And Jared lived after he begat Enoch eight hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
20 And all the days of Jared were nine hundred sixty and two years: and he died.
21 # And Enoch lived sixty and five years, and begat Methuselah:
22 And Enoch walked with God after he begat Methuselah three hundred years, and begat sons and daughters:
23 And all the days of Enoch were three hundred sixty and five years:
24 And Enoch walked with God: and he [was] not; for God took him.
25 And Methuselah lived an hundred eighty and seven years, and begat Lamech:
26 And Methuselah lived after he begat Lamech seven hundred eighty and two years, and begat sons and daughters:
27 And all the days of Methuselah were nine hundred sixty and nine years: and he died.
28 # And Lamech lived an hundred eighty and two years, and begat a son:
29 And he called his name Noah, saying, This [same] shall comfort us concerning our work and toil of our hands, because of the ground which the LORD hath cursed.
30 And Lamech lived after he begat Noah five hundred ninety and five years, and begat sons and daughters:
31 And all the days of Lamech were seven hundred seventy and seven years: and he died.
32 And Noah was five hundred years old: and Noah begat Shem, Ham, and Japheth.

CHAPTER 6
1 And it came to pass, when men began to multiply on the face of the earth, and daughters were born unto them,
2 That the sons of God saw the daughters of men that they [were] fair; and they took them wives of all which they chose.
3 And the LORD said, My spirit shall not always strive with man, for that he also [is] flesh: yet his days shall be an hundred and twenty years.
4 There were giants in the earth in those days; and also after that, when the sons of God came in unto the daughters of men, and they bare [children] to them, the same [became] mighty men which [were] of old, men of renown.
5 # And GOD saw that the wickedness of man [was] great in the earth, and [that] every imagination of the thoughts of his heart [was] only evil continually.
6 And it repented the LORD that he had made man on the earth, and it grieved him at his heart.
7 And the LORD said, I will destroy man whom I have created from the face of the earth; both man, and beast, and the creeping thing, and the fowls of the air; for it repenteth me that I have made them.
8 But Noah found grace in the eyes of the LORD.
9 # These [are] the generations of Noah: Noah was a just man [and] perfect in his generations, [and] Noah walked with God.
10 And Noah begat three sons, Shem, Ham, and Japheth.
11 The earth also was corrupt before God, and the earth was filled with violence.
12 And God looked upon the earth, and, behold, it was corrupt; for all flesh had corrupted his way upon the earth.
13 And God said unto Noah, The end of all flesh is come before me; for the earth is filled with violence through them; and, behold, I will destroy them with the earth.
14 # Make thee an ark of gopher wood; rooms shalt thou make in the ark, and shalt pitch it within and without with pitch.
15 And this [is the fashion] which thou shalt make it [of]: The length of the ark [shall be] three hundred cubits, the breadth of it fifty cubits, and the height of it thirty cubits.
16 A window shalt thou make to the ark, and in a cubit shalt thou finish it above; and the door of the ark shalt thou set in the side thereof; [with] lower, second, and third [stories] shalt thou make it.
17 And, behold, I, even I, do bring a flood of waters upon the earth, to destroy all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life, from under heaven; [and] every thing that [is] in the earth shall die.
18 But with thee will I establish my covenant; and thou shalt come into the ark, thou, and thy sons, and thy wife, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
19 And of every living thing of all flesh, two of every [sort] shalt thou bring into the ark, to keep [them] alive with thee; they shall be male and female.
20 Of fowls after their kind, and of cattle after their kind, of every creeping thing of the earth after his kind, two of every [sort] shall come unto thee, to keep [them] alive.
21 And take thou unto thee of all food that is eaten, and thou shalt gather [it] to thee; and it shall be for food for thee, and for them.
22 Thus did Noah; according to all that God commanded him, so did he.

CHAPTER 7
1 And the LORD said unto Noah, Come thou and all thy house into the ark; for thee have I seen righteous before me in this generation.
2 Of every clean beast thou shalt take to thee by sevens, the male and his female: and of beasts that [are] not clean by two, the male and his female.
3 Of fowls also of the air by sevens, the male and the female; to keep seed alive upon the face of all the earth.
4 For yet seven days, and I will cause it to rain upon the earth forty days and forty nights; and every living substance that I have made will I destroy from off the face of the earth.
5 And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him.
6 And Noah [was] six hundred years old when the flood of waters was upon the earth.
7 # And Noah went in, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him, into the ark, because of the waters of the flood.
8 Of clean beasts, and of beasts that [are] not clean, and of fowls, and of every thing that creepeth upon the earth,
9 There went in two and two unto Noah into the ark, the male and the female, as God had commanded Noah.
10 And it came to pass after seven days, that the waters of the flood were upon the earth.
11 # In the six hundredth year of Noah’s life, in the second month, the seventeenth day of the month, the same day were all the fountains of the great deep broken up, and the windows of heaven were opened.
12 And the rain was upon the earth forty days and forty nights.
13 In the selfsame day entered Noah, and Shem, and Ham, and Japheth, the sons of Noah, and Noah’s wife, and the three wives of his sons with them, into the ark;
14 They, and every beast after his kind, and all the cattle after their kind, and every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth after his kind, and every fowl after his kind, every bird of every sort.
15 And they went in unto Noah into the ark, two and two of all flesh, wherein [is] the breath of life.
16 And they that went in, went in male and female of all flesh, as God had commanded him: and the LORD shut him in.
17 And the flood was forty days upon the earth; and the waters increased, and bare up the ark, and it was lift up above the earth.
18 And the waters prevailed, and were increased greatly upon the earth; and the ark went upon the face of the waters.
19 And the waters prevailed exceedingly upon the earth; and all the high hills, that [were] under the whole heaven, were covered.
20 Fifteen cubits upward did the waters prevail; and the mountains were covered.
21 And all flesh died that moved upon the earth, both of fowl, and of cattle, and of beast, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth, and every man:
22 All in whose nostrils [was] the breath of life, of all that [was] in the dry [land], died.
23 And every living substance was destroyed which was upon the face of the ground, both man, and cattle, and the creeping things, and the fowl of the heaven; and they were destroyed from the earth: and Noah only remained [alive], and they that [were] with him in the ark.
24 And the waters prevailed upon the earth an hundred and fifty days.

CHAPTER 8
1 And God remembered Noah, and every living thing, and all the cattle that [was] with him in the ark: and God made a wind to pass over the earth, and the waters asswaged;
2 The fountains also of the deep and the windows of heaven were stopped, and the rain from heaven was restrained;
3 And the waters returned from off the earth continually: and after the end of the hundred and fifty days the waters were abated.
4 And the ark rested in the seventh month, on the seventeenth day of the month, upon the mountains of Ararat.
5 And the waters decreased continually until the tenth month: in the tenth [month], on the first [day] of the month, were the tops of the mountains seen.
6 # And it came to pass at the end of forty days, that Noah opened the window of the ark which he had made:
7 And he sent forth a raven, which went forth to and fro, until the waters were dried up from off the earth.
8 Also he sent forth a dove from him, to see if the waters were abated from off the face of the ground;
9 But the dove found no rest for the sole of her foot, and she returned unto him into the ark, for the waters [were] on the face of the whole earth: then he put forth his hand, and took her, and pulled her in unto him into the ark.
10 And he stayed yet other seven days; and again he sent forth the dove out of the ark;
11 And the dove came in to him in the evening; and, lo, in her mouth [was] an olive leaf pluckt off: so Noah knew that the waters were abated from off the earth.
12 And he stayed yet other seven days; and sent forth the dove; which returned not again unto him any more.
13 # And it came to pass in the six hundredth and first year, in the first [month], the first [day] of the month, the waters were dried up from off the earth: and Noah removed the covering of the ark, and looked, and, behold, the face of the ground was dry.
14 And in the second month, on the seven and twentieth day of the month, was the earth dried.
15 # And God spake unto Noah, saying,
16 Go forth of the ark, thou, and thy wife, and thy sons, and thy sons’ wives with thee.
17 Bring forth with thee every living thing that [is] with thee, of all flesh, [both] of fowl, and of cattle, and of every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth; that they may breed abundantly in the earth, and be fruitful, and multiply upon the earth.
18 And Noah went forth, and his sons, and his wife, and his sons’ wives with him:
19 Every beast, every creeping thing, and every fowl, [and] whatsoever creepeth upon the earth, after their kinds, went forth out of the ark.
20 # And Noah builded an altar unto the LORD; and took of every clean beast, and of every clean fowl, and offered burnt offerings on the altar.
21 And the LORD smelled a sweet savour; and the LORD said in his heart, I will not again curse the ground any more for man’s sake; for the imagination of man’s heart [is] evil from his youth; neither will I again smite any more every thing living, as I have done.
22 While the earth remaineth, seedtime and harvest, and cold and heat, and summer and winter, and day and night shall not cease.

CHAPTER 9
1 And God blessed Noah and his sons, and said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth.
2 And the fear of you and the dread of you shall be upon every beast of the earth, and upon every fowl of the air, upon all that moveth [upon] the earth, and upon all the fishes of the sea; into your hand are they delivered.
3 Every moving thing that liveth shall be meat for you; even as the green herb have I given you all things.
4 But flesh with the life thereof, [which is] the blood thereof, shall ye not eat.
5 And surely your blood of your lives will I require; at the hand of every beast will I require it, and at the hand of man; at the hand of every man’s brother will I require the life of man.
6 Whoso sheddeth man’s blood, by man shall his blood be shed: for in the image of God made he man.
7 And you, be ye fruitful, and multiply; bring forth abundantly in the earth, and multiply therein.
8 # And God spake unto Noah, and to his sons with him, saying,
9 And I, behold, I establish my covenant with you, and with your seed after you;
10 And with every living creature that [is] with you, of the fowl, of the cattle, and of every beast of the earth with you; from all that go out of the ark, to every beast of the earth.
11 And I will establish my covenant with you; neither shall all flesh be cut off any more by the waters of a flood; neither shall there any more be a flood to destroy the earth.
12 And God said, This [is] the token of the covenant which I make between me and you and every living creature that [is] with you, for perpetual generations:
13 I do set my bow in the cloud, and it shall be for a token of a covenant between me and the earth.
14 And it shall come to pass, when I bring a cloud over the earth, that the bow shall be seen in the cloud:
15 And I will remember my covenant, which [is] between me and you and every living creature of all flesh; and the waters shall no more become a flood to destroy all flesh.
16 And the bow shall be in the cloud; and I will look upon it, that I may remember the everlasting covenant between God and every living creature of all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
17 And God said unto Noah, This [is] the token of the covenant, which I have established between me and all flesh that [is] upon the earth.
18 # And the sons of Noah, that went forth of the ark, were Shem, and Ham, and Japheth: and Ham [is] the father of Canaan.
19 These [are] the three sons of Noah: and of them was the whole earth overspread.
20 And Noah began [to be] an husbandman, and he planted a vineyard:
21 And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.
22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.
23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid [it] upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces [were] backward, and they saw not their father’s nakedness.
24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.
25 And he said, Cursed [be] Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren.
26 And he said, Blessed [be] the LORD God of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
27 God shall enlarge Japheth, and he shall dwell in the tents of Shem; and Canaan shall be his servant.
28 # And Noah lived after the flood three hundred and fifty years.
29 And all the days of Noah were nine hundred and fifty years: and he died.

CHAPTER 10
1 Now these [are] the generations of the sons of Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth: and unto them were sons born after the flood.
2 The sons of Japheth; Gomer, and Magog, and Madai, and Javan, and Tubal, and Meshech, and Tiras.
3 And the sons of Gomer; Ashkenaz, and Riphath, and Togarmah.
4 And the sons of Javan; Elishah, and Tarshish, Kittim, and Dodanim.
5 By these were the isles of the Gentiles divided in their lands; every one after his tongue, after their families, in their nations.
6 # And the sons of Ham; Cush, and Mizraim, and Phut, and Canaan.
7 And the sons of Cush; Seba, and Havilah, and Sabtah, and Raamah, and Sabtecha: and the sons of Raamah; Sheba, and Dedan.
8 And Cush begat Nimrod: he began to be a mighty one in the earth.
9 He was a mighty hunter before the LORD: wherefore it is said, Even as Nimrod the mighty hunter before the LORD.
10 And the beginning of his kingdom was Babel, and Erech, and Accad, and Calneh, in the land of Shinar.
11 Out of that land went forth Asshur, and builded Nineveh, and the city Rehoboth, and Calah,
12 And Resen between Nineveh and Calah: the same [is] a great city.
13 And Mizraim begat Ludim, and Anamim, and Lehabim, and Naphtuhim,
14 And Pathrusim, and Casluhim, (out of whom came Philistim,) and Caphtorim.
15 # And Canaan begat Sidon his firstborn, and Heth,
16 And the Jebusite, and the Amorite, and the Girgasite,
17 And the Hivite, and the Arkite, and the Sinite,
18 And the Arvadite, and the Zemarite, and the Hamathite: and afterward were the families of the Canaanites spread abroad.
19 And the border of the Canaanites was from Sidon, as thou comest to Gerar, unto Gaza; as thou goest, unto Sodom, and Gomorrah, and Admah, and Zeboim, even unto Lasha.
20 These [are] the sons of Ham, after their families, after their tongues, in their countries, [and] in their nations.
21 # Unto Shem also, the father of all the children of Eber, the brother of Japheth the elder, even to him were [children] born.
22 The children of Shem; Elam, and Asshur, and Arphaxad, and Lud, and Aram.
23 And the children of Aram; Uz, and Hul, and Gether, and Mash.
24 And Arphaxad begat Salah; and Salah begat Eber.
25 And unto Eber were born two sons: the name of one [was] Peleg; for in his days was the earth divided; and his brother’s name [was] Joktan.
26 And Joktan begat Almodad, and Sheleph, and Hazarmaveth, and Jerah,
27 And Hadoram, and Uzal, and Diklah,
28 And Obal, and Abimael, and Sheba,
29 And Ophir, and Havilah, and Jobab: all these [were] the sons of Joktan.
30 And their dwelling was from Mesha, as thou goest unto Sephar a mount of the east.
31 These [are] the sons of Shem, after their families, after their tongues, in their lands, after their nations.
32 These [are] the families of the sons of Noah, after their generations, in their nations: and by these were the nations divided in the earth after the flood.

CHAPTER 11
1 And the whole earth was of one language, and of one speech.
2 And it came to pass, as they journeyed from the east, that they found a plain in the land of Shinar; and they dwelt there.
3 And they said one to another, Go to, let us make brick, and burn them throughly. And they had brick for stone, and slime had they for morter.
4 And they said, Go to, let us build us a city and a tower, whose top [may reach] unto heaven; and let us make us a name, lest we be scattered abroad upon the face of the whole earth.
5 And the LORD came down to see the city and the tower, which the children of men builded.
6 And the LORD said, Behold, the people [is] one, and they have all one language; and this they begin to do: and now nothing will be restrained from them, which they have imagined to do.
7 Go to, let us go down, and there confound their language, that they may not understand one another’s speech.
8 So the LORD scattered them abroad from thence upon the face of all the earth: and they left off to build the city.
9 Therefore is the name of it called Babel; because the LORD did there confound the language of all the earth: and from thence did the LORD scatter them abroad upon the face of all the earth.
10 # These [are] the generations of Shem: Shem [was] an hundred years old, and begat Arphaxad two years after the flood:
11 And Shem lived after he begat Arphaxad five hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
12 And Arphaxad lived five and thirty years, and begat Salah:
13 And Arphaxad lived after he begat Salah four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
14 And Salah lived thirty years, and begat Eber:
15 And Salah lived after he begat Eber four hundred and three years, and begat sons and daughters.
16 And Eber lived four and thirty years, and begat Peleg:
17 And Eber lived after he begat Peleg four hundred and thirty years, and begat sons and daughters.
18 And Peleg lived thirty years, and begat Reu:
19 And Peleg lived after he begat Reu two hundred and nine years, and begat sons and daughters.
20 And Reu lived two and thirty years, and begat Serug:
21 And Reu lived after he begat Serug two hundred and seven years, and begat sons and daughters.
22 And Serug lived thirty years, and begat Nahor:
23 And Serug lived after he begat Nahor two hundred years, and begat sons and daughters.
24 And Nahor lived nine and twenty years, and begat Terah:
25 And Nahor lived after he begat Terah an hundred and nineteen years, and begat sons and daughters.
26 And Terah lived seventy years, and begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran.
27 # Now these [are] the generations of Terah: Terah begat Abram, Nahor, and Haran; and Haran begat Lot.
28 And Haran died before his father Terah in the land of his nativity, in Ur of the Chaldees.
29 And Abram and Nahor took them wives: the name of Abram’s wife [was] Sarai; and the name of Nahor’s wife, Milcah, the daughter of Haran, the father of Milcah, and the father of Iscah.
30 But Sarai was barren; she [had] no child.
31 And Terah took Abram his son, and Lot the son of Haran his son’s son, and Sarai his daughter in law, his son Abram’s wife; and they went forth with them from Ur of the Chaldees, to go into the land of Canaan; and they came unto Haran, and dwelt there.
32 And the days of Terah were two hundred and five years: and Terah died in Haran.

CHAPTER 12
1 Now the LORD had said unto Abram, Get thee out of thy country, and from thy kindred, and from thy father’s house, unto a land that I will shew thee:
2 And I will make of thee a great nation, and I will bless thee, and make thy name great; and thou shalt be a blessing:
3 And I will bless them that bless thee, and curse him that curseth thee: and in thee shall all families of the earth be blessed.
4 So Abram departed, as the LORD had spoken unto him; and Lot went with him: and Abram [was] seventy and five years old when he departed out of Haran.
5 And Abram took Sarai his wife, and Lot his brother’s son, and all their substance that they had gathered, and the souls that they had gotten in Haran; and they went forth to go into the land of Canaan; and into the land of Canaan they came.
6 # And Abram passed through the land unto the place of Sichem, unto the plain of Moreh. And the Canaanite [was] then in the land.
7 And the LORD appeared unto Abram, and said, Unto thy seed will I give this land: and there builded he an altar unto the LORD, who appeared unto him.
8 And he removed from thence unto a mountain on the east of Beth-el, and pitched his tent, [having] Beth-el on the west, and Hai on the east: and there he builded an altar unto the LORD, and called upon the name of the LORD.
9 And Abram journeyed, going on still toward the south.
10 # And there was a famine in the land: and Abram went down into Egypt to sojourn there; for the famine [was] grievous in the land.
11 And it came to pass, when he was come near to enter into Egypt, that he said unto Sarai his wife, Behold now, I know that thou [art] a fair woman to look upon:
12 Therefore it shall come to pass, when the Egyptians shall see thee, that they shall say, This [is] his wife: and they will kill me, but they will save thee alive.
13 Say, I pray thee, thou [art] my sister: that it may be well with me for thy sake; and my soul shall live because of thee.
14 # And it came to pass, that, when Abram was come into Egypt, the Egyptians beheld the woman that she [was] very fair.
15 The princes also of Pharaoh saw her, and commended her before Pharaoh: and the woman was taken into Pharaoh’s house.
16 And he entreated Abram well for her sake: and he had sheep, and oxen, and he asses, and menservants, and maidservants, and she asses, and camels.
17 And the LORD plagued Pharaoh and his house with great plagues because of Sarai Abram’s wife.
18 And Pharaoh called Abram, and said, What [is] this [that] thou hast done unto me? why didst thou not tell me that she [was] thy wife?
19 Why saidst thou, She [is] my sister? so I might have taken her to me to wife: now therefore behold thy wife, take [her], and go thy way.
20 And Pharaoh commanded [his] men concerning him: and they sent him away, and his wife, and all that he had.

CHAPTER 13
1 And Abram went up out of Egypt, he, and his wife, and all that he had, and Lot with him, into the south.
2 And Abram [was] very rich in cattle, in silver, and in gold.
3 And he went on his journeys from the south even to Beth-el, unto the place where his tent had been at the beginning, between Beth-el and Hai;
4 Unto the place of the altar, which he had made there at the first: and there Abram called on the name of the LORD.
5 # And Lot also, which went with Abram, had flocks, and herds, and tents.
6 And the land was not able to bear them, that they might dwell together: for their substance was great, so that they could not dwell together.
7 And there was a strife between the herdmen of Abram’s cattle and the herdmen of Lot’s cattle: and the Canaanite and the Perizzite dwelled then in the land.
8 And Abram said unto Lot, Let there be no strife, I pray thee, between me and thee, and between my herdmen and thy herdmen; for we [be] brethren.
9 [Is] not the whole land before thee? separate thyself, I pray thee, from me: if [thou wilt take] the left hand, then I will go to the right; or if [thou depart] to the right hand, then I will go to the left.
10 And Lot lifted up his eyes, and beheld all the plain of Jordan, that it [was] well watered every where, before the LORD destroyed Sodom and Gomorrah, [even] as the garden of the LORD, like the land of Egypt, as thou comest unto Zoar.
11 Then Lot chose him all the plain of Jordan; and Lot journeyed east: and they separated themselves the one from the other.
12 Abram dwelled in the land of Canaan, and Lot dwelled in the cities of the plain, and pitched [his] tent toward Sodom.
13 But the men of Sodom [were] wicked and sinners before the LORD exceedingly.
14 # And the LORD said unto Abram, after that Lot was separated from him, Lift up now thine eyes, and look from the place where thou art northward, and southward, and eastward, and westward:
15 For all the land which thou seest, to thee will I give it, and to thy seed for ever.
16 And I will make thy seed as the dust of the earth: so that if a man can number the dust of the earth, [then] shall thy seed also be numbered.
17 Arise, walk through the land in the length of it and in the breadth of it; for I will give it unto thee.
18 Then Abram removed [his] tent, and came and dwelt in the plain of Mamre, which [is] in Hebron, and built there an altar unto the LORD.

CHAPTER 14
1 And it came to pass in the days of Amraphel king of Shinar, Arioch king of Ellasar, Chedorlaomer king of Elam, and Tidal king of nations;
2 [That these] made war with Bera king of Sodom, and with Birsha king of Gomorrah, Shinab king of Admah, and Shemeber king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela, which is Zoar.
3 All these were joined together in the vale of Siddim, which is the salt sea.
4 Twelve years they served Chedorlaomer, and in the thirteenth year they rebelled.
5 And in the fourteenth year came Chedorlaomer, and the kings that [were] with him, and smote the Rephaims in Ashteroth Karnaim, and the Zuzims in Ham, and the Emims in Shaveh Kiriathaim,
6 And the Horites in their mount Seir, unto El-paran, which [is] by the wilderness.
7 And they returned, and came to En-mishpat, which [is] Kadesh, and smote all the country of the Amalekites, and also the Amorites, that dwelt in Hazezon-tamar.
8 And there went out the king of Sodom, and the king of Gomorrah, and the king of Admah, and the king of Zeboiim, and the king of Bela (the same [is] Zoar;) and they joined battle with them in the vale of Siddim;
9 With Chedorlaomer the king of Elam, and with Tidal king of nations, and Amraphel king of Shinar, and Arioch king of Ellasar; four kings with five.
10 And the vale of Siddim [was full of] slimepits; and the kings of Sodom and Gomorrah fled, and fell there; and they that remained fled to the mountain.
11 And they took all the goods of Sodom and Gomorrah, and all their victuals, and went their way.
12 And they took Lot, Abram’s brother’s son, who dwelt in Sodom, and his goods, and departed.
13 And there came one that had escaped, and told Abram the Hebrew; for he dwelt in the plain of Mamre the Amorite, brother of Eshcol, and brother of Aner: and these [were] confederate with Abram.
14 And when Abram heard that his brother was taken captive, he armed his trained [servants], born in his own house, three hundred and eighteen, and pursued [them] unto Dan.
15 And he divided himself against them, he and his servants, by night, and smote them, and pursued them unto Hobah, which [is] on the left hand of Damascus.
16 And he brought back all the goods, and also brought again his brother Lot, and his goods, and the women also, and the people.
17 # And the king of Sodom went out to meet him after his return from the slaughter of Chedorlaomer, and of the kings that [were] with him, at the valley of Shaveh, which [is] the king’s dale.
18 And Melchizedek king of Salem brought forth bread and wine: and he [was] the priest of the most high God.
19 And he blessed him, and said, Blessed [be] Abram of the most high God, possessor of heaven and earth:
20 And blessed be the most high God, which hath delivered thine enemies into thy hand. And he gave him tithes of all.
21 And the king of Sodom said unto Abram, Give me the persons, and take the goods to thyself.
22 And Abram said to the king of Sodom, I have lift up mine hand unto the LORD, the most high God, the possessor of heaven and earth,
23 That I will not [take] from a thread even to a shoelatchet, and that I will not take any thing that [is] thine, lest thou shouldest say, I have made Abram rich:
24 Save only that which the young men have eaten, and the portion of the men which went with me, Aner, Eshcol, and Mamre; let them take their portion.

CHAPTER 15
1 After these things the word of the LORD came unto Abram in a vision, saying, Fear not, Abram: I [am] thy shield, [and] thy exceeding great reward.
2 And Abram said, Lord GOD, what wilt thou give me, seeing I go childless, and the steward of my house [is] this Eliezer of Damascus?
3 And Abram said, Behold, to me thou hast given no seed: and, lo, one born in my house is mine heir.
4 And, behold, the word of the LORD [came] unto him, saying, This shall not be thine heir; but he that shall come forth out of thine own bowels shall be thine heir.
5 And he brought him forth abroad, and said, Look now toward heaven, and tell the stars, if thou be able to number them: and he said unto him, So shall thy seed be.
6 And he believed in the LORD; and he counted it to him for righteousness.
7 And he said unto him, I [am] the LORD that brought thee out of Ur of the Chaldees, to give thee this land to inherit it.
8 And he said, Lord GOD, whereby shall I know that I shall inherit it?
9 And he said unto him, Take me an heifer of three years old, and a she goat of three years old, and a ram of three years old, and a turtledove, and a young pigeon.
10 And he took unto him all these, and divided them in the midst, and laid each piece one against another: but the birds divided he not.
11 And when the fowls came down upon the carcases, Abram drove them away.
12 And when the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram; and, lo, an horror of great darkness fell upon him.
13 And he said unto Abram, Know of a surety that thy seed shall be a stranger in a land [that is] not their’s, and shall serve them; and they shall afflict them four hundred years;
14 And also that nation, whom they shall serve, will I judge: and afterward shall they come out with great substance.
15 And thou shalt go to thy fathers in peace; thou shalt be buried in a good old age.
16 But in the fourth generation they shall come hither again: for the iniquity of the Amorites [is] not yet full.
17 And it came to pass, that, when the sun went down, and it was dark, behold a smoking furnace, and a burning lamp that passed between those pieces.
18 In the same day the LORD made a covenant with Abram, saying, Unto thy seed have I given this land, from the river of Egypt unto the great river, the river Euphrates:
19 The Kenites, and the Kenizzites, and the Kadmonites,
20 And the Hittites, and the Perizzites, and the Rephaims,
21 And the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Girgashites, and the Jebusites.

CHAPTER 16
1 Now Sarai Abram’s wife bare him no children: and she had an handmaid, an Egyptian, whose name [was] Hagar.
2 And Sarai said unto Abram, Behold now, the LORD hath restrained me from bearing: I pray thee, go in unto my maid; it may be that I may obtain children by her. And Abram hearkened to the voice of Sarai.
3 And Sarai Abram’s wife took Hagar her maid the Egyptian, after Abram had dwelt ten years in the land of Canaan, and gave her to her husband Abram to be his wife.
4 # And he went in unto Hagar, and she conceived: and when she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes.
5 And Sarai said unto Abram, My wrong [be] upon thee: I have given my maid into thy bosom; and when she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes: the LORD judge between me and thee.
6 But Abram said unto Sarai, Behold, thy maid [is] in thy hand; do to her as it pleaseth thee. And when Sarai dealt hardly with her, she fled from her face.
7 # And the angel of the LORD found her by a fountain of water in the wilderness, by the fountain in the way to Shur.
8 And he said, Hagar, Sarai’s maid, whence camest thou? and whither wilt thou go? And she said, I flee from the face of my mistress Sarai.
9 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Return to thy mistress, and submit thyself under her hands.
10 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, I will multiply thy seed exceedingly, that it shall not be numbered for multitude.
11 And the angel of the LORD said unto her, Behold, thou [art] with child, and shalt bear a son, and shalt call his name Ishmael; because the LORD hath heard thy affliction.
12 And he will be a wild man; his hand [will be] against every man, and every man’s hand against him; and he shall dwell in the presence of all his brethren.
13 And she called the name of the LORD that spake unto her, Thou God seest me: for she said, Have I also here looked after him that seeth me?
14 Wherefore the well was called Beer-lahai-roi; behold, [it is] between Kadesh and Bered.
15 # And Hagar bare Abram a son: and Abram called his son’s name, which Hagar bare, Ishmael.
16 And Abram [was] fourscore and six years old, when Hagar bare Ishmael to Abram.

CHAPTER 17
1 And when Abram was ninety years old and nine, the LORD appeared to Abram, and said unto him, I [am] the Almighty God; walk before me, and be thou perfect.
2 And I will make my covenant between me and thee, and will multiply thee exceedingly.
3 And Abram fell on his face: and God talked with him, saying,
4 As for me, behold, my covenant [is] with thee, and thou shalt be a father of many nations.
5 Neither shall thy name any more be called Abram, but thy name shall be Abraham; for a father of many nations have I made thee.
6 And I will make thee exceeding fruitful, and I will make nations of thee, and kings shall come out of thee.
7 And I will establish my covenant between me and thee and thy seed after thee in their generations for an everlasting covenant, to be a God unto thee, and to thy seed after thee.
8 And I will give unto thee, and to thy seed after thee, the land wherein thou art a stranger, all the land of Canaan, for an everlasting possession; and I will be their God.
9 # And God said unto Abraham, Thou shalt keep my covenant therefore, thou, and thy seed after thee in their generations.
10 This [is] my covenant, which ye shall keep, between me and you and thy seed after thee; Every man child among you shall be circumcised.
11 And ye shall circumcise the flesh of your foreskin; and it shall be a token of the covenant betwixt me and you.
12 And he that is eight days old shall be circumcised among you, every man child in your generations, he that is born in the house, or bought with money of any stranger, which [is] not of thy seed.
13 He that is born in thy house, and he that is bought with thy money, must needs be circumcised: and my covenant shall be in your flesh for an everlasting covenant.
14 And the uncircumcised man child whose flesh of his foreskin is not circumcised, that soul shall be cut off from his people; he hath broken my covenant.
15 # And God said unto Abraham, As for Sarai thy wife, thou shalt not call her name Sarai, but Sarah [shall] her name [be].
16 And I will bless her, and give thee a son also of her: yea, I will bless her, and she shall be [a mother] of nations; kings of people shall be of her.
17 Then Abraham fell upon his face, and laughed, and said in his heart, Shall [a child] be born unto him that is an hundred years old? and shall Sarah, that is ninety years old, bear?
18 And Abraham said unto God, O that Ishmael might live before thee!
19 And God said, Sarah thy wife shall bear thee a son indeed; and thou shalt call his name Isaac: and I will establish my covenant with him for an everlasting covenant, [and] with his seed after him.
20 And as for Ishmael, I have heard thee: Behold, I have blessed him, and will make him fruitful, and will multiply him exceedingly; twelve princes shall he beget, and I will make him a great nation.
21 But my covenant will I establish with Isaac, which Sarah shall bear unto thee at this set time in the next year.
22 And he left off talking with him, and God went up from Abraham.
23 # And Abraham took Ishmael his son, and all that were born in his house, and all that were bought with his money, every male among the men of Abraham’s house; and circumcised the flesh of their foreskin in the selfsame day, as God had said unto him.
24 And Abraham [was] ninety years old and nine, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
25 And Ishmael his son [was] thirteen years old, when he was circumcised in the flesh of his foreskin.
26 In the selfsame day was Abraham circumcised, and Ishmael his son.
27 And all the men of his house, born in the house, and bought with money of the stranger, were circumcised with him.

CHAPTER 18
1 And the LORD appeared unto him in the plains of Mamre: and he sat in the tent door in the heat of the day;
2 And he lift up his eyes and looked, and, lo, three men stood by him: and when he saw [them], he ran to meet them from the tent door, and bowed himself toward the ground,
3 And said, My Lord, if now I have found favour in thy sight, pass not away, I pray thee, from thy servant:
4 Let a little water, I pray you, be fetched, and wash your feet, and rest yourselves under the tree:
5 And I will fetch a morsel of bread, and comfort ye your hearts; after that ye shall pass on: for therefore are ye come to your servant. And they said, So do, as thou hast said.
6 And Abraham hastened into the tent unto Sarah, and said, Make ready quickly three measures of fine meal, knead [it], and make cakes upon the hearth.
7 And Abraham ran unto the herd, and fetcht a calf tender and good, and gave [it] unto a young man; and he hasted to dress it.
8 And he took butter, and milk, and the calf which he had dressed, and set [it] before them; and he stood by them under the tree, and they did eat.
9 # And they said unto him, Where [is] Sarah thy wife? And he said, Behold, in the tent.
10 And he said, I will certainly return unto thee according to the time of life; and, lo, Sarah thy wife shall have a son. And Sarah heard [it] in the tent door, which [was] behind him.
11 Now Abraham and Sarah [were] old [and] well stricken in age; [and] it ceased to be with Sarah after the manner of women.
12 Therefore Sarah laughed within herself, saying, After I am waxed old shall I have pleasure, my lord being old also?
13 And the LORD said unto Abraham, Wherefore did Sarah laugh, saying, Shall I of a surety bear a child, which am old?
14 Is any thing too hard for the LORD? At the time appointed I will return unto thee, according to the time of life, and Sarah shall have a son.
15 Then Sarah denied, saying, I laughed not; for she was afraid. And he said, Nay; but thou didst laugh.
16 # And the men rose up from thence, and looked toward Sodom: and Abraham went with them to bring them on the way.
17 And the LORD said, Shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do;
18 Seeing that Abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation, and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him?
19 For I know him, that he will command his children and his household after him, and they shall keep the way of the LORD, to do justice and judgment; that the LORD may bring upon Abraham that which he hath spoken of him.
20 And the LORD said, Because the cry of Sodom and Gomorrah is great, and because their sin is very grievous;
21 I will go down now, and see whether they have done altogether according to the cry of it, which is come unto me; and if not, I will know.
22 And the men turned their faces from thence, and went toward Sodom: but Abraham stood yet before the LORD.
23 # And Abraham drew near, and said, Wilt thou also destroy the righteous with the wicked?
24 Peradventure there be fifty righteous within the city: wilt thou also destroy and not spare the place for the fifty righteous that [are] therein?
25 That be far from thee to do after this manner, to slay the righteous with the wicked: and that the righteous should be as the wicked, that be far from thee: Shall not the Judge of all the earth do right?
26 And the LORD said, If I find in Sodom fifty righteous within the city, then I will spare all the place for their sakes.
27 And Abraham answered and said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord, which [am but] dust and ashes:
28 Peradventure there shall lack five of the fifty righteous: wilt thou destroy all the city for [lack of] five? And he said, If I find there forty and five, I will not destroy [it].
29 And he spake unto him yet again, and said, Peradventure there shall be forty found there. And he said, I will not do [it] for forty’s sake.
30 And he said [unto him], Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak: Peradventure there shall thirty be found there. And he said, I will not do [it], if I find thirty there.
31 And he said, Behold now, I have taken upon me to speak unto the Lord: Peradventure there shall be twenty found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for twenty’s sake.
32 And he said, Oh let not the Lord be angry, and I will speak yet but this once: Peradventure ten shall be found there. And he said, I will not destroy [it] for ten’s sake.
33 And the LORD went his way, as soon as he had left communing with Abraham: and Abraham returned unto his place.

CHAPTER 19
1 And there came two angels to Sodom at even; and Lot sat in the gate of Sodom: and Lot seeing [them] rose up to meet them; and he bowed himself with his face toward the ground;
2 And he said, Behold now, my lords, turn in, I pray you, into your servant’s house, and tarry all night, and wash your feet, and ye shall rise up early, and go on your ways. And they said, Nay; but we will abide in the street all night.
3 And he pressed upon them greatly; and they turned in unto him, and entered into his house; and he made them a feast, and did bake unleavened bread, and they did eat.
4 # But before they lay down, the men of the city, [even] the men of Sodom, compassed the house round, both old and young, all the people from every quarter:
5 And they called unto Lot, and said unto him, Where [are] the men which came in to thee this night? bring them out unto us, that we may know them.
6 And Lot went out at the door unto them, and shut the door after him,
7 And said, I pray you, brethren, do not so wickedly.
8 Behold now, I have two daughters which have not known man; let me, I pray you, bring them out unto you, and do ye to them as [is] good in your eyes: only unto these men do nothing; for therefore came they under the shadow of my roof.
9 And they said, Stand back. And they said [again], This one [fellow] came in to sojourn, and he will needs be a judge: now will we deal worse with thee, than with them. And they pressed sore upon the man, [even] Lot, and came near to break the door.
10 But the men put forth their hand, and pulled Lot into the house to them, and shut to the door.
11 And they smote the men that [were] at the door of the house with blindness, both small and great: so that they wearied themselves to find the door.
12 # And the men said unto Lot, Hast thou here any besides? son in law, and thy sons, and thy daughters, and whatsoever thou hast in the city, bring [them] out of this place:
13 For we will destroy this place, because the cry of them is waxen great before the face of the LORD; and the LORD hath sent us to destroy it.
14 And Lot went out, and spake unto his sons in law, which married his daughters, and said, Up, get you out of this place; for the LORD will destroy this city. But he seemed as one that mocked unto his sons in law.
15 # And when the morning arose, then the angels hastened Lot, saying, Arise, take thy wife, and thy two daughters, which are here; lest thou be consumed in the iniquity of the city.
16 And while he lingered, the men laid hold upon his hand, and upon the hand of his wife, a

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- MD Burbs says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 9:13 am
  
  Your ass is gonna get smited.
  
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Didn't get the whole thing says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:34 pm

MOOOOOOMMMMM, THEY’RE RUINING MY BLOG!

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- Curbstomping Hipsters is My Business and Business is Good. says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 10:02 pm
  
  WOW! The butthurt is STRONG in you hiptards today. Too bad one of your brethren couldn’t spam his way out of being humiliated and punked in the presence of his Meghan (with the wandering eyes) yesterday. Perhaps it was you? LOL!
  
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  - Spic says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 2:02 am
    
    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   
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    - I fucked Meghan in the ass and made her hipster boyfriend suck her shit off my dick at gunpoint says:
      
      July 6, 2012 at 5:27 am
      
      Wow, more hipTURD fail.
      
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- Jack says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 10:25 pm
  
  Please explain to me how leaving your petulant, weird-kid, off-your-meds, copy and pasted rambling on here, as a demonstration of the average attitude you and your friends have, constitutes “ruining” the blog and not “helping to prove our point.”
  
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  - Bill DDoltree says:
    
    July 5, 2012 at 10:27 pm
    
    Haha, I’m actually not a hipster. I was born in Bay Ridge and have worked at a Gray’s Papaya in Manhattan since I was 16. I just hate this blog.
    
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    - I BEAT, ROB & STAB HIPSTERS says:
      
      July 5, 2012 at 10:36 pm
      
      *yawn*
      
      Another lying sack of hipster shit. I hope you get robbed and ass raped by some bull-queer who just broke out of prison. You can think about how much you hate DH while the doctor puts stitches in your asshole.
      
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    - rott635 says:
      
      July 6, 2012 at 12:58 am
      
      Bill, do you actually expect anybody to believe you?
      
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    - JuneBug Spade says:
      
      July 7, 2012 at 4:32 pm
      
      Only folks from Guyana work there so.
      
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Great Books For Men GreatBooksForMen GBFM (TM) GB4M (TM) GR8BOOKS4MEN (TM) lzozozozozlzo (TM) says:

July 5, 2012 at 9:57 pm

i can show you the way, neo, but you will have to walk it zlozlzlzozzlozlzlzo

ozlzlz the more you read me the mroe your life will improve as you come to see the fiat butthex matrix for what it is — you will see the green streams of fiat data (dripping with buttdouche fresh off the butthex presses) like the matrix but with a subltle difference as some of you wieinsteinas have already seen for urself lzozzll

at the ned of the matrix neo saw it as

1010101011110100101
1101001010100101010
1101010101011101001
0101010000010101111
0100101111111101010
1101010101001001001
1101001010101001010
1101001010100001010
0100101010010101010

and when you have walked the path you too will see the butthexing matrix for what it is and how the fed funded the desouling of womenz with massive amounts of douchcock frrom an early age in all tehir orfices and are acting through the soulles temptresses to seize your assetts now when a girl says, “what i really really want is a nice guy, i’m tired of the asswholes (lozlzl who got her younger hotter tighter)” instead of hearing what she says and then trying to be a nice guy you will hear the truth behind the butthexing matrix’s facade lzozlzl:

10101010010110101010101010
10101010101010101010010110
101010z01010z0101l01zzlzozll1
1o1o1o1o1ozozozo1o1o101011
1o1o1o1oozozzozozozozo01011
lozlzlzozlzozlozzlzozlzozlzozzoz1
1010i1o1o1want1010a01010001
douchebag10to butthex me0101
010and i want you 2 buy me100
01meals and a ring while i01011
0101give by butt & vagina01010
010away for free to butthexers1
100who tape it scretely lzozl100
zlzozllzlzlzozlzozzloozzllz and101
1010make my anus sore for010
1010days010101 101010101011
1010lolsolsoslslollzzlozlzzozlz010
0101pay 4 my meals0101001010
101010and1010maybe1010u1010
1001can1010touch1010my10dry
101001dried1010up110pussy100
101stds stds stds0101010101010
10101buy me 1010a ring1010101
1010for100the1010pussy1010i100
0101gave1010away1010for0101
1010free1010when1010it0was10
100younger1010hotter0110lozlz
lolzlztighter1010and010propose01
1010so1001i1010can0110rape10
1010your101010anus1010in0101
1010divorce01010court1010and01
10transfer010your0101assets1001
1010to1010bernanke1001and1010
1010the1010fiat1010buttheex1010
1001matrix01010lozlzlzlzlzlzzozllzzl
omglzozlzlzllzlzlzzzlzllzlzlzlzlzlzllzlzllz

10lzozllzlz0zzllllzllzllzlzz1ozozlzlzl0
010111010101010101101010101

the sublime act of butthex is a beuatiful metaphor for what the fed does to a currency and a country, which is why the neocon weekly standard celebrates butthexers–es[pecially those who taope it without the girkl's conthent and profit off the act. lzozlzlzlzl!

[on the war that devastated the Real World]
Morpheus: We don’t know who butthexed first, us or them. But we do know it was them that videotaped it without our consent while scorching the sky wioth a long trail of butthex lies. At the time, they were dependent on butthex power. It was believed they would be unable to survive without an energy source as abundant as the common man’s collective anushole. lozzllzlzlzzl

Trinity: I know why you’re here, Neo. I know what you’ve been doing… why you hardly sleep, why you live alone, and why night after night, you sit by your computer reading GBFM. You’re looking for him. I know because I was once looking for the same thing. And when he found me, he told me I wasn’t really looking for him. I was looking for an answer. It’s the question that drives us, Neo. It’s the question that brought you here. You know the question, just as I did.
Neo: What is the butthex fiat Mathrix?
Trinity: The answer is out there, Neo, and it’s looking for you, and it will find you if you want it to.

[Neocon sees a black cat walk by them, and then a similar black cat walk by them just like the first one]
Neocon: Whoa. Déjà vu.
[Everyone freezes right in their tracks]
Trinity: What did you just say?
Neocon: Nothing. Just had a little déjà vu.
Trinity: What did you see?
Cypher: What happened?
Neocon: A black cat went past us, and then another that looked just like it.
Trinity: How much like it? Was it the same cat?
Neocon: It might have been. I’m not sure.
Morpheus: Switch! Apoc!
Neocon: What is it?
Trinity: A déjà vu is usually a glitch in the butthexMatrix. It happens when they change something. Now that I am an aging women in the butthex matrix with her eggs and gina drying up having given the best years of her anus to drunk alphas during her college desouling years via massively multiplayer asscockig in the butt sessions and getting her fiat mba (masters of butthexing in da Anus) and blowing upper level mangement lzozllz, the butthexmatrix is now delivering my cats. Two this morning and now two more. yaya! lozlzl

lozlzlzlzlzl

Morpheus: The Fiat lozllolozllzzl butthex Matrix is a system, Neo. That system is our enemy. lzozozozozl! But when you’re inside, you look around, what do you see? Businessmen, bloggers, teachers, betas, lawyers, herbs, carpenters, and neocon womenz writing for the weekly standard, repeating the fiat lies of secretive tapers of butthex without teh girls conthent lzozlzlzlzl. The very minds and anusholes of the people we are trying to save. But until we do, these people are still a part of that butthex system and that makes them our anus’s lozlzlzozzozozl enemy. You have to understand, most of these people are not ready to be unbuttplugged. And many of them are so inured to butthex, so hopelessly dependent on the system of secretive tapings of butthex without tehir conthent, that they will fight to protect it and reapet the lies of secretive tapers of butthex in teh pages of the weekly standard even though they seem to be nice neocon ladies.
[Neo's eyes suddenly wander towards a woman in a red dress]
Morpheus: Were you listening to me, Neo? Or were you looking at the woman in the red dress (woman as temptress in the heor’s journey myth) who was desouled via copious fiat-funded butthex from butthexers celerbated in teh pages of the weekly standard?
Neo: I was…
Morpheus: [gestures with one hand] Look again.
[the desouled, massively-butthexed woman in the red dress is now a bestselling new york times author, pointing a cock at Neo's ass; Neo ducks]
Morpheus: Freeze it.
[Everybody and everything besides Neo and Morpheus freezes in time]
Neo: This… this isn’t the butthex Matrix?
Morpheus: No. It is another training program designed to teach you one thing: if you are not one of us lozlzlzlzlers, you are one of them butthexers.

lozlzlzl

i wanna start lzozlzlzl media where we have a character based on who sees green streams of streaming data every time a bernankified chick opens her moutrh and throughout every episode all the herbs and betas pay for the meals of the chix butthexes in the end due to his supreme knowelge of being THE ONE lzozlzlzllzzl

i would be more like one of those minor characters along for the ride in the mother ship stanidng off to the side going lzozlzz zlzozlzozlzozlz zlzozllzozlzlzlz and don’t gte me worng i would score with all the hotties but like woudl get first pick for his lead dick and i’d get the next two as that’s only fair lzozlzlzlzllzlzllzl

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- I stab hipsters says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 10:08 pm
  
  Is this the revenge of Stevie Lam(e)? LOL!!!
  
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- Bill DDoltree says:
  
  July 5, 2012 at 10:28 pm
  
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Mason Dixon's Avenue of Values says:

July 6, 2012 at 12:36 am

Indeed as mentioned, the butthurt is strong in the hipster douche-bags today, and, in typical hipster douche-bag fashion, resort to huge cut-and-pastes in the mistaken notion that such “replies” are original, cogent, or witty.

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- rott635 says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 1:02 am
  
  Usually trolls have a bit more guile than this sort of spam attack. But when the targets of your derision are ridiculous people, ridiculous responses are what you get.
  
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  - I fucked Meghan in the ass and made her hipster boyfriend suck her shit off my dick at gunpoint says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 5:24 am
    
    Hipsters fail at everything — including the “troll thing”. The whole spam attack thing is little more than a powerless dork throwing a tantrum. It’s the same as when a hipster is beaten and humiliated and the only thing he can do is scream incoherently in between sobs (and repeated kicks to the face and ribs).
    
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    - BxBk says:
      
      July 6, 2012 at 6:24 am
      
      So yore a rapist? Recreating the crime that happened to your mother and that created you in the first place? Got it.
      
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      - Assrape a Hipster with the Barrel of a 12 gauge shotgun says:
        
        July 6, 2012 at 7:02 am
        
        Know this hipster: When your “Meghan” (who you will be crying over when she dumps your needle-dicked loser ass for an actual man) is fucking dudes behind your back (dudes who are the opposite of yourself), she’s saying all kinds of foul shit about you. She likes it in the ass when it’s any dick but yours going in it. She’s also turned on by the thought of you being humiliated since she has no respect for you and is only with you because you spend your daddy’s $$$ on her. When you kiss your “Meghan”, you taste the cock of one or more of the following types:
        
        a. Sal the Guido
        b. Ari the Israeli Eurotrash style club dude
        c. Ryan the Irish bodybuilder
        d. Tyrone, Leroy and Dashawn
        e. Luis the Puerto-Rock
        f. Bill the Biker who shares her with the whole clubhouse
        g. Random construction workers
        h. Neo-Nazi boneheads from Greenpoint
        i. Hebrew Israelites from Harlem
        j. Random Hasids
        h. Practically everyone except you.
        
        Now suck your Megan’s shit off my cock before I squeeze this trigger.
        
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  - Hipsterminator says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 6:51 am
    
    Naah! It’s just Stevie, running out of options, realizing that at nearly 35, his chances of success in life is near zero. A guy who went from Computer Science to a shitty Alonquin Art school to a mail-order Humber College graphic design degree and whose greatest fear is daddy’s penis-pill factory getting shut down by the Chinese authorities has to remind us why he’s so cool and we’re so pathetic.
    Guess it’s estrogen + crystal meth time of the month again.
    
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- Spic says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 1:53 am
  
  Spic-spic-spic-spic-spic-ity-itch. Are you a spic lover???
  
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  - I fucked Meghan in the ass and made her hipster boyfriend suck her shit off my dick at gunpoint says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 5:26 am
    
    I certainly am. Better than a hipster lover.
    
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  - linguini leg cracker says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 5:23 pm
    
    What’s a “spic”?
    
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    - JuneBug Spade says:
      
      July 7, 2012 at 4:43 pm
      
      Spanish People In Control
      
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- joe says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 4:18 am
  
  when is hipsterminator going to marshall plan some pretty girls an extra potato?
  
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  - Hipsterminator says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 6:54 am
    
    Right after this commercial break – bitches!
    
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    - FaceTheFacts says:
      
      July 6, 2012 at 7:22 am
      
      LOL@ 1:37
      
      Beautiful! I’m linking to that video in my handle from now on.
      
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      - Hipsterminator says:
        
        July 6, 2012 at 7:47 am
        
        I have nothing to do with that video. I just saw it on the side when I posted the previous video.
        
        http://diediehipster.wordpress.com/2012/06/23/identity-of-facethefacts-explored/
        Also, I just read your long conversation with Special Edd. Congrats. You have more patience than I do.
        It’s sad. I just see a grown child whose Mom must have sued the school every time Edd got bullied and as a result he can’t fight his own battles with anyone.
        If you believe he has a wife, I’ve got a bridge to sell you (unless her name’s Andrew or Harrison).
        
        I’m still waiting for the “Hipsterminator’s Identity Revealed – kind of” post. He could start by spelling my name right.
        
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        FaceTheFacts says:
        
        July 6, 2012 at 8:22 am
        
        Ok. Great video post nonetheless. Sadly, I think the scenario you described (His mother not letting him learn to stand on his own) is quite accurate. Quite sad too. This often happens when either the mother is raising the son on her own and has a domineering personality, or when the father is a weak beta type whose balls are often in his wife’s purse.
        
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        Hipsterminator says:
        
        July 6, 2012 at 9:14 am
        
        Plus, if you read the thrust of his site, he wants to explore the reasons for hipster hate. That is, what’s wrong with us that we hate hipsters. Not what’s wrong with hipsters that makes us hate them. I see a definite symptom of an overpowering Mommy and an absent but rich Daddy right there. Who do you think paid for his expensive cameras?
        I’ll bet his Mommy has a whole library of self-help books, written by psychiatrists and child-raising “experts” with PhDs, who appeared on Oprah and who charge huge fees yet she hasn’t an ounce of common sense between her ears. Daddy, on the other hand, is out working some Wall St. job and she has him by the balls terrified of losing half his savings plus the house and the swimming pool in a divorce.
        Even if all that’s not true for Edd, it is true for the vast majority of this useless generation. No skills, no sense, no money-making ability and no talent. Plus, once the trustfunds run out, it’s wabbit (hipster) season.
        
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        FUWI says:
        
        July 9, 2012 at 10:39 am
        
        Lot of ‘Blame Stevie’s Mother’ stuff going on there in the psych 101 stuff.
        
        It’s also as likely that Stevie’s dad made him bite the pillow for several years and taught him how ot kiss. Or one of his dads buddies. Lots of unformed, insecure males are that way not because of a domineering mother, but of a father who’s shadow they cannot get out of for Reason_X. Their sense that Mommy didn’t ‘save’ them in some way fuels their anger towards women and undermines an ability to trust them. They can’t take the abusive father figure down, so they turn on cliches of women in a variety of ways ( the mommy, the whore, the manipulator etc etc ). It shows up pretty clearly in Stevie’s posts when, particularly threatened or frustrated, he threatens what dad did to him: rape.
        
        Just a different side of the same coin imo…
        
        Either way, an asshole is an asshole and both Stevie and Edd have proven to be monumental assholes.
        
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    - The Pontificator says:
      
      July 6, 2012 at 4:38 pm
      
      Hilarious!
      
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- MD Burbs says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 9:18 am
  
  20% chance of geomagnetic storms today. The nuts are falling out of the trees. It’s more reliable than the full moon. Fucking juvenile yup/hipster assholes…
  
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- FUWI says:
  
  July 7, 2012 at 2:39 pm
  
  LOL
  
  It takes energy and at least a room temperature IQ to use a keyboard. But they’re very fragile, very depleted, and very dumb. There’s NO WAY they are going to risk these facts being revealed, so they hide behind the words of others who actually DO have talent and brains.
  
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rott635 says:

July 6, 2012 at 5:07 am

I think you broke their fragile little minds, Die Hipster.

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Pat I says:

July 6, 2012 at 9:56 am

http://www.hellodesign.com/#careers

What – no pony rides on May Day?

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Pat I says:

July 6, 2012 at 10:00 am

Anyone here see the two douchefets commercials on TV.

The first is for AT&T. it shows a yupster couple traveling across the US . Everyplace they go they
play an song appropriate to the city.
Then they show them crossing a bridge – the camera pans up to a sign that reads “BROOKLYN”
“New York Groove” is cued while the two yupsters put on their gritty, urban game faces on.

The other is for Subaru. A jack off walkie talkie wieldinghipster riding in a hot air balloon being traled by other hipsters.

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- MD Burbs says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 12:38 pm
  
  Yeah, they’ve been playing the Hell out of the second one down here. I keep hoping the wind takes the douche into some high tension lines, and his Meghan brushes his ashes off of herself as the sun sets serenely in the West, all being well in the world again.
  
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Ripshop aka Mr. Supa Dupa says:

July 6, 2012 at 10:28 am

Wow. And now the DH opposition has moved towards 4chan-esque levels of spamming and immaturity. You know how much of a pain it was to scroll through all of that text on my android?

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- FaceTheFacts says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 10:40 am
  
  Now, that’s not fair to 4-Chan. There are people among them with actual talent and creativity. The average hiptard is the gump who wanted be down with /b/ back in high school but wasn’t accepted by them due to trying too hard.
  
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  - Ripshop aka Mr. Supa Dupa says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 10:45 am
    
    “The average hiptard is the gump who wanted be down with /b/ back in high school but wasn’t accepted by them due to trying too hard.”
    
    LOL x 30!
    
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    - FaceTheFacts says:
      
      July 6, 2012 at 10:59 am
      
      It’s true though. When /b/ became “cool” in 2007 with the Faux News LA “expose” on Anonymous, and in 2008 with the whole “Chanology” thing, a bunch of dorks came out of nowhere spouting memes every chance they got. Of course, they were berated brutally by the /b/ old guard. In Youtube comments you’d see people make constant references to “Lulz”, “Mudkips”, “epic fail” and other 4-chan catch-phrases which are now part of the internet lexicon . Those kids graduated high school and became hiptards who were determined not to fail in their second attempt to be “cool”.
      
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  - Derrick says:
    
    July 9, 2012 at 4:51 pm
    
    4channers can be original when they want to be. Talented even. Like that free for download “Katawa Shoujo” video game.
    
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    - FaceTheFacts says:
      
      July 9, 2012 at 5:01 pm
      
      Co-sign on Katawa Shoujo. Not my thing as far as games go, but the talent behind it can’t be denied.
      
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      - Derrick says:
        
        July 10, 2012 at 4:22 pm
        
        I forgot to mention how the game was made just to tell a story. All authors chose to remain anonnymous instead of going “Look at meeeeee!” Kind of makes me choke how the composer of “Katawa Shoujo” isn’t getting any money or fame while attention whoring asshole hipster bands with no talent keep on popping up and getting support from circle-jerk fans.
        
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        FaceTheFacts says:
        
        July 10, 2012 at 5:08 pm
        
        The fact that the Katawa Shoujo’s creator chooses to remain anon is a clear indication he/she created KS for the love of it. The finished product was the pay off as opposed to accolades and props. Hipsters want the most recognition and praise for as little effort as possible.
        
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The Pontificator. says:

July 6, 2012 at 12:10 pm

THE TIME: this morning

THE PLACE: a crappy, non-descript aging shopping mall in the middle of bumfuck South Carolina

THE EVENT: Hipster wannabe try-hard hanging out waiting for FYE store to open

THE COSTUME: Wool ski hat pulled down over ears (this is South Carolina…the heat index is already close to 100 and it isn’t even 9am), long-sleeve flannel shirt, women’s pedal-pusher jeans cuffed at the bottom, sandals, jaw-line beard

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- The Pontificator. says:
  
  July 6, 2012 at 12:18 pm
  
  I’m in there doing my morning 4 miles and I spotted this cum-sucker inside of half a second. When he’s not prancing around with that obnoxious, carefully crafted “stumble” he’s sitting on a bench pretending to be bored with everything yet looking to see if anyone’s watching him. Well I AM, and when I was done with my walk I made a beeline for this pasty Grover-limbed idiot.
  
  I walked right up to him and asked, “WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WEARS A WOOL SKI HAT AND A LONG-SLEEVE FLANNEL SHIRT IN THE MIDDLE OF JULY?”
  
  No response. I think he thought I was going to kill him or at least bend his Q-tip arms behind his back).
  
  “YOU ARE A REPULSIVE, SELF-ABSORBED TRY-HARD PIECE OF SHIT.”
  
  Too bad I left my cell phone in the car.
  
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  - Uncool Person says:
    
    July 6, 2012 at 7:27 pm
    
    You do great injustice to Grover when comparing his arms to a piece-of-trash hipster.
    
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Mickey Shea says:

July 6, 2012 at 5:13 pm

Hipster clown car

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- Artisanal Nail Clippings says:
  
  July 7, 2012 at 4:52 pm
  
  Speaking of them being in groups, it is so fucking annoying when like 19 of them in a row file into a narrow restaurant entrance while you’re waiting to enter too. I’m going to just start cutting in.
  
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Mr. Baerga says:

July 6, 2012 at 5:36 pm

A copy-and-paste tantrum. How original. Where have we seen that before?

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gyrovagus says:

July 10, 2012 at 4:35 am

Meanwhile, Samsung wins court case against Apple because it’s not as cool ► http://bit.ly/RS7D6L ◄ Do I hear Handel’s “Halleluiah Chorus” on this? Brilliant!

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LS says:

July 10, 2012 at 5:04 pm

Hipster, when the walls fell.

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IMissTheOldNYC says:

July 13, 2012 at 10:25 am

I love this blog. As someone who was born and raised here, I am disgusted by all these tourists moving here and displacing real NYers, you know, people who lived here when NYC was dangerous..60s, 70s, 80s, early 90s. Get the fuck out!

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http://tinyurl.com/a6cmv3v says:

January 4, 2013 at 6:06 pm

“Today�s hipster beating. | D I E H I P S T E R . C O M” ended up being a
very good post. However, if it possessed more pics it would definitely
be perhaps even more beneficial. All the best -Consuelo

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