Like yah!!!! Are you like, between the ages of like, 25 – 40 and like, want to act like a child in summer camp? Well then join the team of Brokelyn.com tonight as they kick off the summer in true hipster transplant fashion with a summer camp themed night in a beer garden in none other than the magical land discovered by progressive pioneering creative types: WHIMSYBURG!
If you don’t know about Brokelyn.com; it’s a website run by a bunch of transplants who would like to help their readers understand Brooklyn culture and save money on important things like PBR, coffee, rooftop films, rooftop veggies, yoga mats, and bicycle related stuff. Just check out the list of activities planned for tonight:
- Make new friends scavenger hunt
- Friendship bracelets, macaroni art, popsicle stick sculptures, etc.
- Ping pong, bocce and ladder ball tournaments
- Best of Brooklyn raffle (win a brand new bike from Ride Brooklyn, among other sweet prizes- Water balloon toss
- Sweater fondling and/or refrigerator humping
- Spin the bottle
- Makin’ out behind the mess hall
Yes, this is what Brooklyn has become: coddled, nasally, snarky, adult toddlers from Midwestern cul-de-sacs living in $2000 a month apartments who make macaroni art and friendship bracelets while the rest of us normal people watch in awe as Brooklyn becomes a pussified liberal arts campus for perpetual infants with child molester moustaches, lice farm beards, and extra small $150 designer lumber jack shirts.