Somebody sent this to me and I added the captions. It looks like Quinn and Zebadiah are living their dream. After hearing about the newly discovered Mecca of Brooklyn a few years ago they began researching “freaks in NYC” on the internet – giving them all the ideas they would need to come here from the mid west to pay any amount of rent asked to be quirky and zany and beg to be looked at on the famous L train. Just so you know, every piece of glitter and extended eyelash you see represents a displaced normal working family in Brooklyn. The bottle of piss? I can’t think of what that represents other than a “look at me” prop. These fucking try-hards are about 20-30 years too late in the game. At least they stick to the hipster transplant agenda: re-use, recycle, and flat out kill anything that has ever been done before.
We need a good heavily armed street gang like the 90s again.
I agree. Bring back the Lo Lifes so they can kick the living shit out of these trendy try hards.
agreed.
I dont think you guys forgot about Hummus and the Ocean Hill robberies.
http://gothamist.com/2011/07/02/welcome_to_brooklyn_students_forced.php
Well the “Brower Boys” were burglarizing “new comers” to the Crown Heights neighborhood, aka hipsters. They would ring the bell and see if anyone was home and when the time was “right” they would commit their crimes.
I believe that one of them even got shot.
http://www.nypost.com/p/news/local/brooklyn/facebook_em_gang_busted_5ZTTJeeMG2U5BJVztT4CjN
Cry me a river
So?
Why are they all from fucking Ohio? I know a ton of them “from” WIlliamsburg that come from Ohio. They’re in Prospect Park right now having a 35 year old’s birthday party.
The Hasids are laughing all the way to the bank every month at the expense of mommy and daddy back in Ohio.
They are from Ohio because no one wants them there. They are hated and harassed, and have no place if their own. so they leave for zanier places. awful, I know.
(Im from Ohio, so I know, even though I haven’t lived there in years.)
We got plenty of hipster douchebags in Ohio. Y’all got the overflow.
Here’s the best part. Epic butthurt all around!
These fucking inflated rent paying attention seeking transplant pieces of shit all think they are the first people to play kickball, have massive snowball fights and push each other around while sitting inside of shopping carts and in an urban environment etc…
MOTHERFUCKERS! FUCK ALL OF YOU!
STUPID ATTENTION SEEKING TRANSPLANT PIECES OF SHIT
I DID ALL OF THAT SHIT WHEN I WAS IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL!
I WAS 7 YEARS OLD!
I’d be willing to bet that some of them are Congressional or K Street interns. No wonder things are falling apart…
“Zebadiah” that’s another version of the “Caleb” phenomenon I mentioned in the other blog.
Now what we need to do is get them to start a Snake Handling Pentecostal Church in N Brooklyn. The like to bring their farming and that crap to Brooklyn, right? Maybe Zebadiah and Caleb could start a hipster snake church. Says right here in the article that the church is trying to expand and gaining more and more 20 and 30 somethings:
http://religion.blogs.cnn.com/2012/06/01/death-of-snake-handling-preacher-shines-light-on-lethal-appalachian-tradition/?hpt=hp_c1
You could rid Brooklyn of Zeb’s and Caleb’s pretty fast with something like this. Unfortunately the Josh’s will probably still be around, but there are other methods that could cover that.
Naah – the poor snakes would get sick and die if they bit one.
I hate how they use the term “experience” to describe every single thing they do. Having a cup of coffee is not an experience, it is a caffeinated beverage.
I hate when they use “purchase” when they buy something. As if buying a cup of coffee is the result of months of research and deliberation.
Both those observations are dead on funny.
A few months back some sincere friend ordered me a bag of ground organic fairly traded beans from some loompaland type place. A colorful bag with a bunch of typical mumbo jumbo stuff about how wonderful they are for existing in the coffee industry at all.
Look, coffee should wake you up and make you shit. Not fill the nostrils with heavenly expectations and wonderousness. It’s four in the fucking morning and I don’t give a rats ass about the joys of java. I just want to wake up, shit, shower, and shave. I find it difficult to trust anyone who seriously financially invests in any of those things.
I dumped the stuff in with my cannister of maxwell house which was about empty. I thanked my friend of course and told the usual polite lies, but I was happy to get back to my usual stuff.
But, I don’t consider drinking coffee anything but an experience of necessity. The hipster. otoh, needs parades for just about every aspect of their daily existence or their own neurotic fear of the mundane would set their internal alarms off and leave them all on their backsides and blubbering like babies.
They should all be wearing Gerber’s shirts.
I think they should “experience” a hipster beating.
LOL!!
Here’s another one of our soon to be new neighbors:
http://newyork.craigslist.org/brk/sha/3040353771.html
Oh dear god. Somebody put that fucker out of his misery.
“HAY CAN I MOOCH OFF YOU FOR AN INDEFINITE PERIOD OF TIME? I’LL JUST STINK UP YOUR APARTMENT AND TAKE ALL YOUR BEER, AND IN RETURN YOU GET MY GREEEEEEAT LOSER PERSONALITY”
Lets just hope he finds a roomie that will crack his skull and eat his brains
or some og’s looking for fresh meat and fun
There won’t be much to eat there. Just empty space.
And organic, detoxified space at that!!
“Healthy eating for the OG: pesticide free, artisanal hipster on a stick, grown in Ohio”
I’m sorry? Seriously? Not only does he want a free place to stay but he wants you to come and get him? Hate to be the materialistic weasel here but whats in for the other party? Just the joy of bring another beardo in a plaid shirt to Brooklyn? Does this really happen?
Check the two settings, without beard, in his parents house and he looks healthy. With beard, in a public toilet, skinnier, rattier looking. This guy is clearly a homeless junkie who is probably willing to suck dick for a fix…until he gets on his feet. Oh yeahhhhh! Zany! Let’s do this!
COME PICK ME UP FROM PHILLY OH YEEAAA!! AND TIE CEMENT BLOCKS TO MY FEET AND DROP ME IN THE RIVER OH YEEAAA!!!!!!
No! WHY!?
This is the WORST craigslist posting EVER!
So, you want me…to drive 2 hours (it’s really one and a half, but add traffic) from NYC to Philly to not only pick you up…but to give you a place to stay. Where no doubt you will not pay ANY rent…where you will most likely stink up the place and leave it dirty…where you will most likely bring in all sorts of vagrants and street rats to squat…where most likely it will end with me kicking you out on your ass and throwing your stuff out of my apartment window!!!!
People never cease to amaze me these days.
Considering the problems I and many of my friends have had with PAYING roommates over the years, why oh why would anyone want all that headache for free???
Best bit, he’s probably expecting some big-titty blond chick to take him in cos he’s so cool.
Unfuckingbelievable. This idiot is in for some hard lessons real fast.
I can only imagine what either of his parents would think if they saw this ad, especially his mom…how horrifying it would be to realize your kid is stupid enough to risk becoming the next new member of some mind control cult bent on pimping out the lowest level members for money; some perverted, psychotic homo-serial killer tag team looking for a new victim to torture, rape, and kill; and insert any other predatory type who might see his ad.
But, the hipster is always, always smarter, in their own minds, than everyone else around them. It’s OTHER people that get hurt and victimized. It’s OTHER people who are stumbled by their ignorance.
i want to fucking scream…this is unbelievable…How can this posting be serious? Is this fucking clown so clueless to think someone would pick up a complete stranger in philly, drive them to nyc and let them crash on their couch til “I can get on my feet”?
if i acted so incredibly entitled and clueless when i was that age, i would hope someone would have shot me in the fucking head
I say one of us does this. Pick him up, and drop him off in the worst neighborhood in the Bronx. I’d pay to see this happen (as in, I’d pay to have your car disinfected afterwards)
How desperate can you be for attention? Pathetic. It pisses me off knowing its because of these people we are losing brooklyn
idiots like that really makes me want to let my rottweilers loose in the subway!!
Hipster field report: So tonight while taking a semi critical OD patient to a manhattan ER, we learned the my try hard cousins organized a massive mobile flash dance party. So far they have prevented at least 6 ambulances from getting to jobs and blocked the ER bay entrance of the hospital i took my patient by dancing to crappy techno. Instead of getting out of the way of ambulances in emergency mode, they felt that the sirens and lights were part of their party and gathered around the bus! Thank god nypd has our back and cleared the mess.
LOOK AT MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
I sure wish there were hipsters in those buses!
So they could see how it feels to be injured and not be able to get help because of some idiots party blocking the entrance.
they need to srsly start cracking heads of ANYONE who gets in the way of ER vehicles.
period. end of.
and the emt’s need to start just mowing the fuckers down…you’re trying to save lives…not shake asses….hipsters = grease stains = perfect;
Yup – simple answer = don’t slow down.
Perfect!
just complaining about a monster-backpack wearing hipster this morning and led to this blog….. ANYWAY, can’t those assholes be arrested for blocking transport of an emergency vehicle? I know it’s illegal here in Chicago
by the way, where can we send our hipsters? it doesn’t sound nearly as bad here as there but maybe we can round them up and ship them off to an island somewhere.
I’ve been suggesting the same thing. I’m thinking of starting a MakerFaire to encourage them to make their own island, 100 miles due east of Long Island…and then torpedo it.
Michael Alig, they are not.
Seriously, look at the pictures in this BV post. You’d of thought that simple shame and self respect would constrain these overgrown children. But the worst part is not the looks at all – it’s that this talentless hipster demi-god raised not just her $100k nut but $1M!!! Meanwhile, we’re closing fire houses. Hipsters never disappoint.
http://www.brooklynvegan.com/archives/2012/06/amanda_palmer_p_1.html
Look carefully at the photos. I’ve never seen so many cankles in my fuckin life. LOOK. The Megans all have ‘em!
The latest new cafe signs to be seen outside the trendyfoodiesshitholes state,”No skinny bitches allowed!!”. Obviously that is to encourage the patronage of MeganAshleyMelissa-cankles who love to shovel food down their throats as quickly as possible because any other expectation of them would be ‘mean’. It’s a message that can’t be aimed at the men since so many are determined to disappear a la King’s ‘Thinner’ story or resemble junkies of some sort.
And the palmer chick? Ugly as a bowl of hairy catepillars. The whole shaving off the eyebrows and drawing them back in thing, whatever woman’s wearing it, is one of the most retarded looking face assaults invented. Is she even a chick or is she a tranny? ( wait for it, lil’ lamb will surely now lol )
Of course they have a stripper pole there. This Womyn’s Studies collective wouldn’t be complete without a stripper pole for showing off all their armpit hair, cankles and cellulite. Blecch.
Notice they got a man up on one of them. That’s the ultimate goal, a man on every pole…
That’s Neil Gaimans wife. Isn’t
he loaded?
Seriously, wtf is the big deal about this chick? She can’t carry a tune in a bucket. She can’t sing a note. Her music is just awful.
She must give great head.
She knows she’s got to give head to get ahead.
Gonna give Amanda a pass. She’s a musician who has been around for a while and while not for everyone, is actually quite good, is not a part of the hipster scene (much closer to glam rock from the 70′s), and has more talent in her pinkie than most vegan-photgrapher-interns have in their body and parentally provided iProducts combined.
Hipster Bee Hive’s wreaking havoc. So Zacky and Piper were too busy on a urban oyster and duck exploration weekend in and around the Gowanus Canal to impress some fat, cankle-queen, corn fed Iowa hipster bitches for the past few weeks that they forgot to tend the bee colony atop thier pad in the Schwick. Hungover, the boys neglected the bees in the throes of passion with thier fat bottomed, midwestern accented, skid marked granny panty wearing hoefers. Now the bees are swarming.. Nice work assholes.
http://newyorkpost.com/p/news/local/attack_of_the_bees_WokJWffDWZevVSn0xddJyM
Some dipster was on here not long ago mewling vociferously about their impressive bee keeping techniques and educating us all about it, and as is typical of them, no amount of common sense could reach his hive mind about the repurcussions of pretending to know what you’re doing vs reading about it on Wiki and then pioneering your way into destruction.
Repercussions are totally and fully lost on them. They just act in a righteous belief; the long term impacts be damned.Things like predators and disease? Insignificant considerations. What’s important is how much attention they can draw to themselves and how many converts they can make in the process.
I couldn’t help but hear a snotty hipster honk coming from those defending the practice in the responses. Such fucking waste of spaces these hipster fucks are.
Oysters. The Next Big Thing. In one week I have seen two shows on WNYE Channel 25 that were absolutely apeshit crazy on the subject. These people actually tried raising caged seed oysters in the Gowanus but they were eaten by rats. The oysters,unfortuanetly, not the people. Stay tuned. The big hype is about to be cranked up.
Oysters and the Gowanus? Even if they become safe to eat after transplanting them to fresh clean water, would you still trust it, let alone the hipster douchebag to actually do such a task?
All the sane commenters on this site would know better. But “foodies” (what an annoying, disgusting term) and other hip, EDGY people consider themselves too sophisticated for the plebian tastes of the common people..
love to watch one of those cowards do this!!! http://www.nydailynews.com/news/brooklyn-man-saves-13-fatal-fire-article-1.1089008
Folks, I know its still the tri-state area but don’t forget a lot of them are coming from CT, too.
I love it – your caption is absolutely dead on. Speaking of look at meeee no-talents on the subway, was just on the F headed to 2nd Ave and got to see one porkpie hat wearing stringbean with Buddy Hollys surrounded by nothing but hispanic families with little kids, the guys having a loud discussion about the Mets. One of the little kids was swinging around his plastic bag and kept bumping Hayden, who was too scared to shoot off his kazoo in protest. I hope he got the message that it’s time to go back home – made my morning.
The worst thing about the photo of the two costumed idiots is that it was taken at TWO IN THE AFTERNOON ON A TUESDAY.
Get a fucking job!
Not surprising considering that song “We Are Young” is the biggest hipster anthem of all time, it’s all fun and games leaving someone else to be a productive member of society. (Fuck any radio station playing that piece of shit every hour).
I forgot where I saw it but I read an article a few months back and it may have had something to do with OWS or something like that. Anyway, a few ‘youngsters’, ( when did a 25 year old qualify as a youngster? Here I was thinking that 12 year olds were ‘youngsters’….), were interviewed and one said something very directly about getting a job.
He said that it was a bad idea to accept work from anyone because ‘the entire system is flawed and designed by a few uber-rich to enslave people’. IOW, it was all ultimately hopeless and so the solution was to make your way on your own terms and as far outside ‘the system’ as possible.
Who wants to bet he doesn’t feel that way when he’s 50? lol
The saddest part of all is I can’t help but wonder if some of them are really just trying to bide time till their parents kick the bucket and they get a house and car for nothing, but that’s probably way too cynical to ponder seriously for any length of time.
You’re not cynical. You’re realistic. I’ve heard of some offenders telling people that their profession is “waiter,” as in “waiting for my inheritance.”
Well, my brother in law and his son are both “waiters”, waiting for their inheritance. I heard from a friend that they’ve even actually SAID that. Neither one of them work, and that plan was hatched by my fat, pasty, cankled, knock-kneed pigeon toed sister in law who doesn’t work either. My mother and father in law are the some of the kindest, hardest working, most generous people, and don’t deserve that kind of ingratitude. It’s disgusting. Seriously they are the most awful people on the planet. The only thing they are entitled to is a hipster beating, the sooner the better.
I caught the tail end of a metal show with a friend last night. The place is packed, the band is tearing it up, and they’re so loud enough that you’re feeling the songs instead of hearing them….So it’s pretty fucking cool. Except for this bony little twerp sporting a stupid Brooklyn hat who keeps spazzing out and jumping into the metalheads who are clearly not into it, and throwing this idiot halfway across the floor every time. I kept hoping someone would launch this twit back to Ohio throw the door, but no such luck.
..through the door….
He’s lucky they didn’t turn him into Jello and mail him back.
So my buddy Mike who loves your blog thinks that you may be a hipster in disguise. Say it isn’t so.
There’s always that possibility. But saying no isn’t gonna stop your buddy Mike from thinking.
Me and my friends used to dress like that.
However it was 1992 and we’d be on our way to the Limelight.
The Limelight which is now an upscale mall.
This was a trend that started in the mid-80s. Google “Leigh Bowery”.
A fuckin men, I man I worship till this day.
Club kid days been there, done and over with…..keep up with the times or DIE Hipstas
I went to Samuel J. Tilden H.S. in Brooklyn from 1975-1979, and when we would hear the Jolly Stompers were gonna be around after school, we knew someone was gonna get their asses kicked royally, we just hoped that it wasn’t gonna be us. Where are they now that we need them? BTW, born and raised in Brooklyn when it truly was the best place to be from, and damn fuckin’ proud of it!
I love people who call themselves real New Yorkers yet understand nothing about New York. New York is about being anything goes, no holds barred and in your face not to mention being in a constant state of evolution. New Yorkers innovate something where others have begun to lay the ground work, generations of our ancestors have proved this. Just because people are different and express themselves differently doesn’t mean they don’t want something better out of life like most other Americans. New York is about change and it’s never going to be what it used to be because things progress forward, not backward. Holding onto the past like a toddler with toy makes you look a lot older than you think. Not to mention that tomorrow is election day and there are so many small minded, closed off entitled individuals sharing this city with me. Why do you stay here if you hate what it’s become so much? You’re paying the same amount of rent as I am if not more and are spending all your time behind a computer screen hating on my friends when they go out, inspire people and live their lives. Get a hobby or move.
well i live in san francisco and i ride around on my bike usually wearing a bikini top and tight jeans and high heels etc. Its so retarted that sometimes someone will yell out their car window shouting “fag” im like, ……duh! but one day someone shouted ” tranny hipster” i thought to myself while laughing. I think i’ll use that
Bitching about transplants is so 2008. Get over your ego & share the city.
-A Native New Yorker
Ed I see your IP. Anyway, what native would approve of effeminate tryhards moving in?
Get Sozed again, like you did last summer
Get Sozed again, like you did last year
Don’t you remember you’re always getting Kaisered
Every time you use a different name over here.