FUCK THIS ARTISANAL BULLSHIT ALREADY!

This is by far the most nauseating, blood boiling, smug, ridiculous article I think I have ever read. There is simply so much absolute bullshit in it that I cannot even bring myself to dissect it and stomp on it. I have zero energy after reading it – it completely drained me. The hipster slang used in it to describe Brooklyn and this overpriced artisanal douchebaggery trend amongst the fly-over state, rent-raising intruders is infuriating. I will leave it you, the commenters to destroy this shit in the comments section. Also please try to leave comments in the actual NY Mag article comments section as well since we know very well that all the bearded, sickly looking, pretentious mother fucking cocksucking artisanal gentrifiers will be watching closely. Paying the prices these hipster fucks ask for their bullshit “hand-crafted” products would require the same amount of stupidity as paying an admission fee everytime you wanted to use your own bathroom. God, I am feeling so sad for us natives right now.

Link: NY MAG – OVERPRICED ARTISANAL SHIT IS GREAT FOR BROOKLYN! YAH YAH!

157 thoughts on “FUCK THIS ARTISANAL BULLSHIT ALREADY!

  1. A friend gave me a copy of a magazine called ‘Fast Company’ and in it was their picks on up and coming companies. In the middle of the list was another ‘interior’ article dedicated exclusively to talking about…this is hard to write without laughing…Occupy Movement companies that are dedicated to Occupy Movement ‘trends’ or something LOL Nearly every single new ‘company’ featured a hipster at the head of it, all with job titles such as the pages of DH has exhaustively covered. One of the companies was run by two guys who print messages onto dollar bills with reasons of why we should all embrace the Occupy blah blah blah.

    A company based on THAT?

    Bahhhh hahahahahahhahaha.

    Another of them said,”Our critics say we should be specific about Occupy’s demands. Because they say we don’t have any. But our response is that it’s not OUR responsiblity to do that. THEY are the ones who have failed everybody.” BTW, it was the March 2012 edition if you’re interested in checking up on what I’ve written and no, I didn’t get any of it verbatim but as I recall it, I’m not far off the mark lol I threw the mag in the trash afterwards.

    I’m sorry, is it just me or do these people make no sense whatsoever?

  2. “artisanal”, “locally sourced”, “from Brooklyn”–at this point these are all overused marketing terms to sell overpriced shit. And now there’s this:

    http://newyork.grubstreet.com/2012/05/brooklynized-water-taste-test-barclays-center-arena-nets.html

    ‘In March, we first learned the official water of the new Barclays Center in Brooklyn would be produced by the Original Brooklyn Water Bottling Company … which is based in Boca Raton, Florida. The water itself is “Brooklynized,” which the company says is (marketing schtick) a process that makes the water taste more like water that’s actually from Brooklyn.” Yes, we can’t just turn on our taps and get Brooklyn water from our own faucets, we have to go out and buy it.

    And this, too: http://newyork.grubstreet.com/2012/03/barclays-center-brooklynized-water.html

    And finally this: http://newyork.grubstreet.com/2011/03/last_week_a_wine_store.html
    It doesn’t happen very often, but once in a while NYMag puts out an article that DOESN’T piss me off.

Comments are closed.