The $40 “Old School” Haircut.

Once again, the hipster is showing us dull, uncultured, cave-dwelling native Brooklynites how to be “Brooklyn” and in this case “old-school” according the article in New York magazine for “Best Barber Shop in New York”. Of course this shop can be in no other neighborhood but Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

Although we know where to find – off the top of our head – about a dozen if not more traditional, plain old barber shops that for about $8 – $15 will give you the typical “sides and back short and a little off the top” haircut – leave it to a ‘completely original’ hipster to whimsically charge you $40 for it. Mostly, because you get to watch Russell Manley (ironic last name of course) give it to you.

Yep, Mr. Manley is quite the zany and original character. I don’t think, wait, scratch that. I know I have never ever in my life seen a guy with sleeve tattoo’s, a W.B Mason moustache, paperboy hat and Pinocchio vest – especially in Brooklyn. Hey, there’s a first time for everything I guess. (I love being taught culture by people like this!!!)

I can pretty much imagine the once in a lifetime experience (for one of us dull and bland natives) of getting an “old school” cut at Mr. Manley’s Tommy Guns barbershop, and it goes something like this: You wait for an hour and a half in re-purposed wooden chair with hipster scratchiti art carved into it while Mr. Manley finishes his 7th latte of the day and answers phone calls because Stephonica his receptionist is either hungover or took the week off to go back to the Midwest for more gentrification cash. Finally, it’s your turn. You sit in the vintage leather chair and get draped with a smock bought from none other than Molly’s hand-crafted Apron and Smock booth at the Brooklyn Flea. Mr. Manley asks you how you’d like your hair cut. You say “sides short and a little off the top”. Mr. Manley corrects you and says, “Ohh, you mean our original,signature and patented Old-School haircut?” He then wets your hair with Voss or Smart water – opens the drawer and takes out his $700 scissors which were locally hammered and welded by Jackson Von Nasalthroop - Ye Olde Niew Bruekelen’s blacksmith. All the while in the background, an i-Pod is shuffling Sinatra, The Ramones, and the Beastie Boys to give this faux New York barber shop that authentic New York feel. You are finally done. You look no different than if the Russian barber in Brighton or the Spanish barber in Sunset, or the Italian guy in Bensonhurst had just cut your hair. You walk to the register. Mr.Manley says “That’ll be $40.00 plus tip!”. As you reach for your wallet and notice the bowl of complimentary Mast Bros. miniature chocolates – you lose it and run for the drawer, grab the straight edge razor and begin to slice up every last mother fucking nasally and quirky Toby, Josh, Hayden, Caleb, Zane, Riley, Walker, Parker and Zacheriah in that fake fucking hipster barber shop.

Have a nice day.

Link: New York Magazine – Best Barber Shop in New York.

80 thoughts on “The $40 “Old School” Haircut.

  1. I know two barber shops , 1 in Sheepshead Bay the other in Brighton Beach that still looks like this and the barber looks just like this. The only difference the barbers are older Jewish guys as opposed to this young douche bag. I guess old Brooklyn was not allowed to enter this competition

    • Clever. Playing dress up to rip off. I am more hands on though, ski mask and bats yo.

      • I approve of this tactic to separate the hipsters from their parents’ money.

        Are cupcakes over? The bakery near my dad’s house that’s been around forever (at least since the early 60s) is doing specialty cupcakes to ride the fad…..but still does the donuts, paczki (Polish pastries eaten during Lent), wedding cakes, and birthday cakes that they’ve done since our older siblings were kids…

        • I declare a fatwa on these fucking cupcakes. Enough already.

        • There’s hope. While going out to see family yesterday, I saw two former Dallas-area cupcake places, both in areas where the yups have more than enough money for frivolous expenditures. (Out here, you can judge the wealth of a suburb just on the number of high school heroin dealer busts in a 12-month period.) One still had the sign up on the side of the strip mall, but the store itself had been stripped out months ago and replaced with a “for lease” sign. The other still had everything inside, but had a big letter on the front door from the landlord, informing the tenant that the locks had been changed and the contents would be released upon remittance of the back rent still owed. I suspect that some Flower Mound hipster-to-be is going to be crying in his Ovaltine over how Mom and Dad already spent the money he was going to use to start a vintage store.

    • Hipster chameleon. He slithers into whatever guise tickles the wallets of the local try-hard. Fake as could be. Hipsters will line up around the block, pretending not to really care, and he’ll make a killing. I hate everything about these people.

      • Like I said, he changes his look to the local clientèle. All he has to do is dress up like an asshole and people will line up to give him $40 bucks a haircut. He kinda says he only does one kind of haircut. This is like Nick the barber. Mom used to take me and my 2 brothers. 30 minutes later we would all have the same haircut. Then you get to school the next day and everybody else had the same haircut. Nick only did the one haircut, what my mom used to call “a proper boys haircut”. This guy is smart only charging $40. He probably leases so his cost are a bit high. So he might break even at $20. He charges $40 and it’s $20 bucks in his pocket pure profit. Cash business too. Now this article they will be lining up around the block for his shtick. A year from now he sells the business to a real hipster with dads money who does not know how to cut hair and will run it into the ground. I have got to figure out a similar scam.

        • Phase 2:

          Open “Ye Olde American Underpants Collective” store in Billyworld and sell used underpants to hipsters for $40 each. Add $100 extra for artisinal skidmarks.

          Now, excuse me while I go over to Kickstarter.

          • Thanks for reminding me of this, I build complex software systems for the city and at least once a week I think of the underpants gnomes. Powerpoint makes the complex seem very easy to the very stupid. I would love to see the powerpoints sent to kickstarter

          • “Powerpoint makes the complex seem very easy to the very stupid.”
            Now THAT’S a quote I need to remember.

        • I’d rather have Sweeny Todd give me a haircut than this jackhole.

    • Nice find.

      One one hand, I kinda like that this guy is taking advantage of these idiot hipsters who will pay $40 for an $8 haircut.

      On the other hand, his opening a “trendy” shop like this only helps to enable the hipsters by making the neighborhood more hipster-friendly.

      So I vote: NAY!!!!

      • Did you ever read the Sneetches by Dr. Suess? Same thing. This guy is going to give them the latest haircut and next week, when there is a new style, he will cut their hair to that style, and on and on until a year from now he has fleeced them of all their parents money.

        • Yep, this reminds me of that scene in Mark Twain where he was assigned to paint a fence, then convinced the other children that fence painting was so great that they should pay him to allow them to paint it.

          While the destruction of Brooklyn is sad, at least its serving now as a sinkhole for all of the worthless assholes in the world, so that other people are free of them.

          • I think in the long term the neighborhoods become, ironically, unsustainable. The folks who can’t quite afford Manhattan move into the “trendy” neighborhoods and then the landlords cashout with million dollar condo’s. Pretty much happened in Cobble Hill and Willaimsburg. And while there are a smattering of hipsters in Cobble Hill, it’s now mostly yupsters. Neighborhood becomes equally unusable to me. a baby toy store is no more useful to me than an artisianal breast milk cheese shop. In one you can’t walk down the sidewalk because of the bicycles in the other it’s the double-wide strollers

          • Tom Sawyer would kick any hipster’s ass in a heartbeat. Funny thing, though, most of the hipsters do dress like Huck Finn.

      • I used to get haircuts at a place on 66th street right off 18th. They did women’s hair too. No nonsense, perfect cut and they’d shave the neckline and side burns with a straight razor.

        I wonder if this whimsical wonder cuts hair according to Queensbury rules?

        • I get my hair cut for $8 by some Russian dude on Nostrand Avenue who probably doesnt even know what a “Hipster” is.

  2. For christ’s sake! How do you allow this to happen in your own f’ing neighborhood? I might have to fly down there and administer the next hipster beatdown. I get the same ‘old school’ hair cut I’ve been getting for the last 50 years, and I pay $9 plus a $2 tip. My barber is 80 years old, there is one chair, the visibility is about 4 feet because of the cigarette smoke – yes, you can smoke in there – and there’s a stack of ESPN and Maxim magazines. That’s what a barbershop is supposed to be.

    Anyone who goes to this place also deserves a hipster beatdown for the low, low everyday price of just $40

    • $8 plus a $2 tip to the nice Chinese lady in the Asian strip mall every six weeks. 6/4, top/sides clipper cut…

  3. Is it me or does he look like the most bad ass lesbian you ever saw?

  4. http://nymag.com/bestofny/beauty/2012/prenatal-chiropractor/

    Did anyone see this link at the bottom? OK, chiropractic is another quack scam masquerading as real medicine. Somehow, thanks to Oprah and the rest of the New Age Earth Mother twats, has achieved the status of respectable despite links to Scientology and other shitty cults.
    Now, of course, the hipster moms are inflicting it on their unborn.
    Guess they want their kids to grow up physically and mentally retarded just like themselves. Unschooling anyone?

    • OK, let me ask a couple of things here:

      She offers “Maya abdominal massage…” What the Hell is that? “…and a “V-steam spa room,” which is a 30-minute Korean spa treatment for the you-know-what.” No, I don’t know what.

      P.T. Barnum was right!

      • I consider myself mostly left-leaning. As in, I believe in workers’ rights and separation of church and state. I believe Creationism has no place in the classroom.

        What pisses me off then is people who claim to be so liberated who then believe some other form of pseudo science like chiropractic, homeopathy or antivax nonsense and consequently endanger the lives and health of their kids and those around them. Which is exactly what this is. Nothing therapy, which does nothing yet these shitheads charge an arm and a leg for basically nothing. Then they have the nerve to call themselves progressives.

        Watch “Eat Pray Love” again if you don’t understand what I mean.

  5. If you’re paying more than $25 for a simple “a little off the top and short sides” haircut…you are just doing it wrong.

    I digress though. It seems like this dude is just some hipster kaizer soze that basically knows people out there are dumb for novelties and is just making money based off of that. I can’t really hate on that.

    • Don’t quite get the Kaizer Soze connection, although the guy was in dire need of a haircut.

  6. But at least its in an area that we’ve already lost. At least its not Ozone Park or Mott Hill or Bed Stuy or Bensonhurst.

    • I’m fearing Bensonhurst isn’t far behind. I’ve been spotting them here and there recently. And they’re already moving into Bay Ridge.

      I’m starting to plan to move out before I get priced out of my apartment.

      • The Arab guy on 20 Ave between 64th & 65th St. gives a perfect, no frills cut for $12. No line, in and out. I’ve been getting my cuts for the last year and a half or so during lunchtime at a place in Tribeca near work – old Russian dude – $15. If a guy can afford to charge $15 in Tribeca, I seriously doubt $40 in Williamsburg is anything but an absolutely blatant ripoff.

        And if there is a wait at normal places, you can flip through a regular sports magazine or talk to the other people waiting. I have a feeling at beardo’s Williamsburg Ye Olde Shoppe, you are waiting for an hour while listening to Caleb, Hamilton, and Ethan kazoo about $15 toast at Egg or their connections that get them in at Roberta’s mediocre pizza.

        • FUCK dont tell me that Lady J. My partner…not “partner” and I are moving to Bensonhurst in July. We have a guy that rents out to police, EMS and fire for way below price….There were 2 more uhauls on my block today…5 more people that I have gotten to know over the last 3 years are gone. But on a positive note, ill get to learn more about art art art art art art art from the 8 new beardos that just showed up today….fucking shoot me.

          • I live by the 18th ave N station and they are slowly popping up around here. Makes me want to carry a brick.

        • Haaaahahah @ Hamilton! If I got introduced to a guy named Hamilton I would shit myself. So these days, I’d better carry around some toilet paper because it’s bound to happen.

          • Get ready – I’m sure a new wave carrying the names Hamilton, Rassmussen, and Stansbury are being raised in Cul de sacs all over Iowa as we speak, just one more schoolyard beating away from hopping on the next plane to NY, to express their creativity with Star Trek action figures molded out of cruelty free clay, and to whimsically frolic in McCarren puddles at 2pm on a Wednesday morning.

          • Speaking of McCarren park puddles:

            A day in the life of a hipster family. Kids are 40 and 35 respectively, as they invite Mom and Pop from Iowa for a day out in ye olde Brueklyn.

            (Sorry, but I just helped out at a party for a bunch of 5 year olds. When Peppa Pig came on, they all stopped playing and didn’t start again until it was over. Should be fun to watch when stoned)

      • I grew up in Bensonhurst and got my first haircut done by “Tony Continental” on 18th and 64th. My God. If hipsters are indeed moving into to formerly hyper-insular Bensonhurst, the invasion is indeed complete…

  7. Sorry – I have to disagree with anyone who applaudes this guy for “sticking it” to the hipster. I don’t disagree with some sort of behind the scenes way of taking their money, but joining them and playing dress up angers me. Trust me, he enjoys every moment of wearing ball crushing jeans and a Rollie Fingers moustache. It also bothers me that you can get that “old school” haircut in any barber shop in Brooklyn but NY Magazine must highlight this try hard. Fuck him.

  8. I would administer this hipster beatdown with a retro Babe Ruth 48 oz bat that I chose ironically- but only after I decimate that ipod playing Frank Sinatra. Ol’ Blue Eyes must be spinning in his grave reading this.

  9. BTW a haircut at Tommy Guns isn’t $40. It’s…choke…$75.

    The $49 is for the “hot towel shave”.

  10. I was seated at a table at a wedding with my stupid ex boyfriend who came dressed almost exactly like this fucktard. Pringles guy mustache and all. He’s 40. He still rides a skateboard. When this transformation happened, I have no idea but I suddenly realized over the years he turned into a hipster. Even though he lives in Jersey with a wife and kid.

    It was further confirmed when he invited me to Santacon. I told him I had no desire to go bar hopping with a bunch of drunk transplants.

    So proof that not all hipsters are transplants. Some are actually born and raised here, but just never want to grow up.

    • every plant is a weed somewhere

    • Ya I know what you mean. Seeing these overgrown “men” with those long skateboards is baffling. I mean look at these people. An older cat just came down to the city to see some relatives and he commented on how he noticed real adults have gone extinct. I am in my mid 30′s and yo man I am in a state of shock. I remember when I was a little kid and I would meet 18 year old men and women and they were like full blown adults. They dressed like adults, talked, ect at 18! Now I see people at my age and I am very surprised. Its almost another species.

  11. I just paid $8 bucks for a haircut in Marine Park,gave him $2 tip because he spoked lil english but I was happy…This place is for dingbats and he looks like an asshole with that mustache,i wish them failure

  12. i was informed that the king hipster(the one with the coke) said chinese girls are out and heavy black woman are in

  13. Every working man must be properly groomed and well dressed if he wants to be taken seriously. $40 a cut is for the people, who do not adhere to these rules. The kids who get these hair cuts, most likely get them once every two months. The average man gets his hair trimmed at least twice a week. It evens out at the end. I’m thankful I switched to metro north, not a hipster in sight.

  14. I don’t know all that much about New York but I’m pretty sure if I ever made a list of the Worst of New York this guy would be on the cover.
    Not the business. The douchebag. The business would be on page 4.

  15. no thanks, ill stick to ahmad, my palestinian barber here in jersey…arab music in the background, a few parakeets, pre israel maps on the walls…..dude keeps it real…’classic’ cut and shave 18 bucks, thanks.

    stupid hipsters.

    • That’s pretty awesome. I go to Serge, who is Brazilian. His uncle used to cut my hair for years before he died. $12 , car magazines, FHM, Sports Illustrated. Serge is a real racing nut and he always has some Grand Prix racing channel on with the commentary in Portuguese. Placed hasn’t changed if forever and he gives a nice haircut. Don’t know what all the hipster fuss is all about. Just every month of 2 I drop in and get a $12 dollar haircut that looks great. why complicate things?

  16. I rather have a hipster cut my hair than a palestinian that still doesn’t recognize Israel and his pet bird

  17. The Expedition

    A short Meller drama

    By Pat I.
    ——————-

    (Opening scene: Tommy Gun’s barbershop and Mustache Spa in quaint, progressive Williamsburg. Tommy Gun walks in)

    CUSTOMERS: TOMMY!!

    TOMMY: HELLO LADS! (puts his arm around Jere, his apprentice barber). Has my young apprentice been seeing to your needs?

    CUSTOMER 1: Ahh Tommy, he’s a fine one! It won’t be long before he has his own shop and stealing your customers away!

    CUSTOMER TWO: Maybe he’ll have one of that contraptions that plays the wax cylinders. My personal favorite is “In the Good Old Summertime”. Such a catchy little ditty.

    CUSTOMER 3: I like the version done by The 40 Year old Interns – but you’ve probably never heard it.

    (Lots of ribald laughter)

    (Door opens)

    TOMMY: Why it’s Milbank, the newsboy!

    MILBANK: Here’s your paper, MR. Gunn!

    TOMMY: Why thank you, young man! Say – why don’t you go to McTransplant’s Tavern and fetch us us some pickled pig’s feet and a bucket of ale?

    MILBANK: Sure Mr. Gunn!

    TOMMY: Oh and a little something for you, boy. 50 dollars for a phosphate and a Mast Brothers chocolate bar!

    MILBANK! Gee Wilikers! Thanks Tommy – I mean MR. GUNN!

    (Laughter)

    Tommy: On your way, boy. And tell Mr. McTransplant I want the ale in an authentic wooden bucket not those new fangled metal ones. And be quick about it!

    MILBANK! YES SIR! (runs out of store)

    Tommy: (shakes head and chuckles) What an imp!

    CUSTOMER 2: So Tommy – How’s Young Nell.?

    TOMMY: Beautiful as ever. Finest cankles this side of Bedford! We went out walking last night. Stopped by Harrigan’s Chop House, Went for a boat ride on the Gowanus. Then on to Mast Brothers for some chocolate wrapping and free sasspirilla. Afterward we shared a bag of hand salted roasted peanuts while listening to the latest music – It’s called “Rag Time”.

    CUSTOMER 3: What an odd name!

    CUSTOMER 2: Could Be worse – They could have called it “N*gro Music”

    (laughter)

    TOMMY: and then… we walked home….and I asked her to marry me!

    (ALL) HUZZAH!!! HUZZAH!!!! HUZZAH!

    (door slams open)

    MR GUNN! MR GUNN! COME QUICKLY!

    TOMMY: Why it’s Shinola the little n*gro shoeshine boy! What’s wrong son?)

    SHINOLA (Panting): It’s Caleb! He’s crawling up the sidewalk. He’s hurt!

    (store empties out to tend to Caleb)

    TOMMY: CALEB! OH GOD! WHAT HAPPENED!

    CALEB: I…was….scouting…out ..the new territory…Bensonhurst….The natives caught us…Tommy…they have no mustaches…and…they make pizza..in gas…..gas….OVENS!

    (collective gasp)

    CUSTOMER 1: Where’s Joshua, Jeremiah, Hunter and Anakin?

    CALEB: The women….got to them….big women…..pummeled them and put them to work in the sequin mines in a place called….Canarsie.

    TOMMY: GOOD LORD! …Not the sequin mines! Those savages! Can ya move son?

    CALEB! AHHHHH!!!!!! THE PAIN!!!

    (they turn him him over. There’s a large item protruding from his rear.

    CUSTOMER: What in God’s Name….

    CALEB! The ring leader…. Loday something or other….punched me in the throat and forced this into my backside. Then she dumped me here to “send a message”. It’s called a “doughnut? Dough Boy Dilworth?

    TOMMY: Say no more. I’m familiar with these skalleywags! It’s not a word for progressive, forward thinking gentleman.

    CUSTOMER 3: For Goodness Sake! Pull it out!

    CALEB: NOOO!!!!! IT’s glued in! Sweet Saint Lorraine of The Vegan Communion Wafer! ! Does this mean I must give up my post as chief street lamp lighter!

    TOMMY! Rusty – call Dr. Calgon. The rest of you – meet me at Ye olde Armory near The Mast Brothers factory! Tonight we fight back!

    Customer 3: Tommy- you don’t mean –

    TOMMY: Yes. Unpack the i-phones. Make signs for the women. Tonight we march into battle –with protruding buttocks and arms ready for fisticuffs according to Queesnbury rules. Remember – look sharp – mustaches waxed and gymnasium costumes clean! If we survive – everyone gets a participation trophy! Now let’s do the Williamsburg chant:

    ALL: LATTE LATTE ART ART ART! WILLIAMSBURG WILLIAMSBURG WILLIAMSBURG RAH RAH RAH!!

    • “We’ll attack as soon as we mince up the hill!”

    • Brilliant.

    • You need to write a book. That’s the funniest thing I’ve read since Tom Sawyer and the fence.

      Actually, sell it in Barnes and Noble. Then the rest of us homophobic meatheads can read it out loud in Starbucks and laugh ourselves silly. Hell, I’ll bring a Tannoy.

    • ‘Mustache Spa’ lol sounds like gay slang, but then we are talking about hipsters…

  18. Dude, I tell everyone that YELP is unfairly targeted towards williamsburg because all the hipster aholes on their latops who give everything a perfect score. They rated that place “Dumont” best burger in nyc so I took my gf last summer and what a piece of crap. I couldve walked up my block to Skinflints in Bay Ridge, 100x better….

    If hipsters take over Bay ridge i’m gng to bensonhurst or gravesend…….

  19. First of all I want to say hello. I love this blog, I’m an avid DH reader. It is also my first time commenting. Native New Yorker from the South Bronx. I moved out of NY and I’m fucking horrified to return.

    I have a copy of NY Mag’s “Best of New York” edition and I lost it when I got to the section called “Home Help”. There is a column titles “Farming Class : City Chicken Workshop” omfg this workshop is located in Crown Heights …. Ughhhh disgusting YouTube on how real estate angencies are trying to revamp and “clean” up crown heights and many of these disgusting Hipsters are making their way into Crown Heights also known as “ProCro” a mash up of Prospect Heights and Crown Heights. The column goes on to say that here they teach you how to design a coop and what’s even worse, how to “handle health inspections.”

    There’s an apprenticeship to be certified as “Urban Hen Experts” WTF?!?!!!!!??!!?!!? Omfg that’s not all!! It ends telling you that your friends might make fun of you, but when you show them your half dozen of eggs, they’ll go nuts WTF…. The only place I like to see live chickens is in the “Live Poultry” warehouses……disfukingusting

    • INSANE!!! This shithead hipster downstairs from me actual told me last summer she was gonna get a chicken coop for the 12 x 12 worthless backyard my building has. I asked “why” and she gave the whole “fresh eggs” spiel. I told her it would stink and the thug dudes in the barber shop would shoot them.

      WTF with this urban chicken farmer shit????

    • “Best of New York” has been intrumental in destroying the REAL New York since about 1970.
      It was New York Magazine’s special Brooklyn edition of that year that sent gentification into high gear with it’s blather about ” the largest stock of Victorian housing in the country.”

  20. @ 12 – 24 times a year, $480 – $960 annually for ^*$^&@# grooming!

  21. as much as i hate fuckin hipsters (and if do HATE THEM!) at least this guy went to barber school and learned how to cut hair. if he wants to play dress up while cutting, let him. he scores low on my douch bag scale.

  22. cuffed jeans always give the interlopers away

    • It starts like this:

      NEW YORK—A series of horrific, devastatingly injurious events failed to befall 33-year-old Flavorpill.com digital media developer Jake Reston as he confidently skated to work on his longboard, shocked witnesses reported today.

      Hundreds of aghast Manhattan commuters who watched Reston not hit a pothole with his idiotic oversized skateboard or fly uncontrollably through the air and smash his stupid fucking face right into the pavement said they were compelled to look away when Reston’s foppish, military-inspired canvas shoulder bag didn’t become snagged on the side-view mirror of a passing taxi cab and cause him to be dragged screaming down the street.

  23. http://www.blogto.com/fashion/hollow-ground-barber-shop-toronto

    A horrific place that just opened in my Toronto neighborhood (luckily, mostly still Portuguese). Hipster check-list:

    -fedora™

    -idiotic vest™

    -ink sleeves™

    -Cory Doctorow / Elvis Costello glasses™

    -they wanted to set up a place “in their neighborhood™” (guy from Winnipeg, setting up shop near Koreatown and Portuguese neighborhood)

    -”they’d been collecting ‘barberabilia’ from junk shops”

    -exposed brickwork

    -”authenticity”™

    -desire to “revive the neighborhood barbershop™” (you will never anyone Portuguese going within 50 feet of this place)

    My god, the originality is so breathtaking. I would’ve never guessed any of the above..

  24. Is it me or is this dude gassed? LOL……of course this fuckin shithead is gassed! This is narcissism at its finest. Did you see that picture in the link that Swamp Yankee posted?? Way to stare into the camera all sensual you fuckin dick. Nice pose dude. You should model.

    This dude is trash and his jerkoff barber shop novelty is trash. FUCKOUTTAHERE with $40 haircuts. He’s in league with all the other asshole business proprietors embracing that horseshit gimmick theme nonsense trying to cash in. A calculated attempt at being weird and different. It just fuels the sucker movement and furthers the FRAUDULENCE.

    Nice pocket watch too dick.

  25. A $40 haircut?! Fuck that shit! Only the guidos that work in the investment offices in my building pay that much for a haircut.

    I can get a haircut, a proper razor shave and even a hot-fuckin’-towel at a place down Broadway in the financial district for just $15 by a nice family-owned Jewish barber shop.

    You can even buy a mistakenly-left-behind Rolex for a deal and a steal, if one were so inclined.

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