diehipster’s missed connections

To Wednesday and Pugsley Addams (but in this case the girl looked like Pugsley and the guy looked like Wednesday) on an afternoon A train the other day. You got off at 14th St most likely switching to the good old L. Your nasally, drawn-out, vapid conversation sounded so rehearsed that I almost stood up and kicked you both in the teeth. Pugsley, when you told Wednesday that you just moved to Bushwick but you’re originally from the LES (unless you meant Lower East South Dakota) you pretty much comfirmed why I hate your fucking wanna-be, lying, dirty poseur asses so much and knew you were just another 1-5 year vacationing hipster piece of shit. I wanted to ask you but I was too shy I guess… but, why do you dip your heads in vegetable oil before you leave the house? Maybe I’ll see you again soon? You’ll probably never read this because you seem like you’re always busy being cool and urban.

90 thoughts on “diehipster’s missed connections

  1. Well, this site is boring now. According to diehipster’s new archenemy, diediehipster, this vapid bimbo who gives vapid bimbos a bad name is the last word in comedy.

    Look how she mocks a normal brooklynite for wearing lace gloves and fixing her tablecloth on the subway.



    i return on 999, like the upside-down demon i am.

    Mail Attachment-1 Oh, hai! I’ve been all sorts of busy so I kind of, you know, forgot how to write or use a computer or, you know, wash and feed myself. Sorry about that! It’s a long and involved story about how we moved, and we had no interwebz for like ever, and then my grad school program started, and… now I have tape all over my face. But I digress. Let’s talk about what’s REALLY important, namely the fact that apparently it’s cool to completely lose your mind, toss on some jaunty green lace gloves, and hop aboard the W train. See, some people would be all, “How is she crazy? Gloves aren’t that weird.” Yes, they are, and I’ll tell you why. A. I took this picture in the sweatiest, grossest part of July, which means that (lace?) gloves are unnecessary clothing in the least clothing-friendly time of year, in addition to being completely bizarre on anyone who isn’t doing a clever early Madonna impression or isn’t a cute 14 year old Japanese girl. 7. Notice that our friend is wearing a blazer, recall that I took this in July, and notice that she’s also carrying an additional jacket, slung over her briefcases, that appears to have been fashioned from an impossibly peppy quilt. H. I don’t have to give more reasons. She’s bonkers. 2 briefcases? Bonkers. And yes, they ARE briefcases. At one point she opened them both and they were all paper-filled. Maybe she’s got a Kuato, and her leader of the Martian resistance wants its own briefcase and festive blazer, whatever, I don’t know, but I DO know that it’s weird and… I’m… back? So… yeah. I missed you all, and as long as my interwebz access continues unfettered and my glorious (glorious is code for moldy and kind of smelling of urine) on-campus studio doesn’t swallow me whole, I will never abandon you again.

    • GAIL VICTORIA BRADDOCK QUAGLIATA (an irritating, annoying fucking hipster cunt)



      From fucking Chicago.

      Irritating HO HO HO HO HO HO HO HO



      ARt for the mentally retarded.

      • What a irritating, untalented fuck. She thinks she’s some shit doesn’t she?

        Look at me!! I’m a photographer! I’m an artist! I’m sooooo sarcastic! I live in the most expensive place in the world without having a job! Yeah nice photos of a sign, a building, the ground, the subway wall, a toilet, the stove.. And I can use Photoshop!!! Yeah, you’re such a fucking talent. NYC thanks you for your arrival, you witless rag.

      • OH MY FUCKING GOD!!!!!!!

        This bitch is fucking DELUSIONAL!!!!

        She has less than zero talent. All her pictures look like she pointed the camera out the fucking window or took a picture of the horse’s ass in her stable. I mean WHAT THE FUCKING FUCK IS WRONG WITH HER????

        What did she do?

        Did she give ED (Erectile Deficiency/Ed Sandwich/Ed David) his first ever blowjob???

    • “Knife Fight In Brooklyn” That name is like soooooooo urban and punk rock. Who the fuck is she to be making fun of some old woman on the train and what she’s wearing/doing? Here’s a perfect example of spoiled brats who move to gentrified Brooklyn on the backing of parental funds, try to act street tough, fuck around with shitty art projects, sarcastically blog about all their fake bullshit while insulting and disrespecting normal working families and real Brooklynites who are just trying to live their lives in peace. Fucking slime.

      Yeah, I wish there were more knives being thrown around in Brooklyn. I’d love to see this worthless bitch in a real “knife fight”.

      • The closest a hipster-yuppie transplant will ever get to a “Knife Fight in Brooklyn” is struggling with their little-girl strength to cut through a $46 slab of organic free-range ‘caveman meat’ at their latest flash-in-the-pan gentrification restaurant. The fact that some yupster uses the term “Knife Fight in Brooklyn” like they’re some fingerless-glove-wearing badass from the Michael Jackson “Bad” video is hilarious and exactly what I would expect from one of them.

    • Ah, reading all of your comments on her blahg was so relaxing, like taking a really good shit. Keep up the good work everyone.

  2. Sioux Falls SD? Haha.

    I just found this video that I thought would be fun to share on this website:


    This young woman in the video is certainly what I would call a hipster. She looks like she’s trying so hard to be ugly and unattractive, but yet is clearly very insecure about her looks at the same time.

    Who has such problems being alone?? I mean everybody gets lonely, but come on, you can’t be alone at all?? You’ve gotta be constantly around somebody to feel okay about yourself??

    Maybe the reason that I have a such a big problem with this is because I don’t understand it. People irritate me immensely for the most part, so I very often prefer being alone. Whatever. She’s an unattractive, unoriginal, neurotic hipster bitch.

    • Oh Good Fucking God!

      Another self-help bimbo without a brain.

      Guess what honey? Go see Eat Sleep Pray sometime and go travel to places with brown people, do what some toothless fortune teller tells you (after handing him a big wad of cash). Bring no money and find yourself and find a Spanish hunk for a husband.

      Hurry before all the other Carrie Horsfefaces beat you to it.

        • HAhahahhahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa

          FUCKING FUCKER!!!!!!!

          The Palm d’Or RIGHT HERE!!!!!!!


          Julia Roberts IS a fucking ugly ass horse face


          JULIA versus CARRIE BRADSHAW??????????

        • Hipsterminator: HAHAHAHAHA!!! Thanks for the morning laugh.

          Soon to be seething again….will be on the L in a couple hours.

        • I hate to use the stupid internet abbreviations, but seriously, ROFLMAO!!!

    • I could only get a few seconds in but: GODDAMNIT!!!!!!!!

      Since this is annonymous, I will freely admit I WANT TO KICK THIS BITCH IN THE FACE!!!!!

      There is a reason she is alone……………………..


      Plus, theinfamous, the entire world has gone down the crapper and I don’t want their fucking company either.

      What kinda mentally retarded FREAK has trouble sitting at a fucking LUNCH COUNTER and needs TONS OF WHINEY, NASALLY, IRRITATING inner dialogue retarded self-assurance JUST SO THEY CAN EAT A FUCKING GRILLED CHEESE ALONE??????????


      The only mercy G -D has shown me is that THIS fucking annoying Beetle face bitch is in SD and not Brooklyn.


      • Do you wake up mad??

      • My GOD you’re pathetic. Just listen to yourself. You throw a temper tantrum at 8:50am on a Saturday morning just because of some young woman’s blog. What are you…5 years old?!? Didn’t get laid last night? You clearly have no life whatsoever, and you’re bored, lonely, and this site is your way of communicating with the rest of the world and a way to keep yourself company. You’re worse than any hipster.

        The creation of Diediehipster is a great thing to bring intelligent people together to mock idiots like you. Now you’re a bigger laughing stock than any hipster. Way to go knuckle-dragger!!

        • Yep, Stevie, you think you would GET THAT BY FUCKING NOW. DUH….


          GOT IT YOU TWINKIE BITCH? AND THAT GOES FOR YOU TOO TEA-BAGGER…..don’t you got a dick you could be sucking?

          How fucking long have I been on here ranting like a foaming at the mouth SOCIOPATH??????

          How LONG have both of you lame-ass human turds been making those absolutely RETARDED comments to me….??????


          Keep at it…..see if it has ANY EFFECT WHATSOEVER…



          • Jeez, whatta grouch!

          • Jeez what a cocksucker.

          • Are you too a married couple, longterm boyfriend/girlfriend or someting? Seriously, it looks like it. You both bicker with each other like you are.
            Not that I’m complaining, it’s kinda fun to watch.

          • I know! Ain’t it great!
            : )

          • No sadly, teabagger has a homosexual crush on me.


          • Not to worry IKJ, you’re not my type, you’re much too…. excitable.
            What’s more, I’m not really convinced that you are in fact a man. Given your propensity for hysterics, the ease with which you are insulted, and your admittedly remarkable grudge holding capabilities, you present more as an angry woman.

          • No Stevie, you only wish you could insult me. Most of the time its actually pity.

          • Plus you sound like a woman hating QUEEN.

            Go get some botox you twinkie shemale.

          • “Not my type”


            Spoken like an outed bust up old hag of queena!


            Not your type? REALLY???

            Cuz you’re on here every fucking day trying to suck my dick.

            Fucking hilarious……..

          • Wait, you didn’t know that t-bagger is Stevie Lam?

          • I probably missed alot of those comments but the t-bagger comments I did see were too short, didn’t have the usual imbecillic Stevisms. But still I usually spot him and his sock puppets pretty quick.
            Damn, I’ve been off my game.

          • My hand to God – I’m just a regular diehipster reader.

          • Oh…your hand to G-D?


            The queena doth protest too much, methinks.

          • pwned!

    • theinfamous: These are some pathetic ass motherfuckers – and they really are convinced they are more creative, unique, talented and entitled than the rest of the world, when they are the exact opposite. Every-fucking-thing these worthless freaks do has to be put on a stage. Even something like spending time alone becomes one big production about themselves. I couldn’t make it through the whole thing it was so nauseating.

      I feel so alone right now, I’m gonna go play my mouth-harp and knit myself some assrags in front of the projects and then make a video about it.

    • “Hell is other people”.

    • she made me gag when she used her finger to eat the cream off of her plate, in PUBLIC! ugh, where the fuck do these inbred uglies come from. i’ve noticed how these pasty faces lick their fingers while eating walking down the street. EVERYTHING they do makes me sick! no wonder she’s lonely.

    • i knew a guy who played the ukele. except he was 17, doing it for fun, and didn’t take himself seriously

      basically he realized that it was just fun when you were fucked up

  3. i know things are tough now, but look at it this way:

    if the economy keeps going down the shitter and your city loses money then they won’t be able to maintain a police force like they have, and when they can’t scare off all those swarthy gentleman who are bored and maybe even looking to make some quick cash….well you know the rest

    if they don’t buy a bag of dirt and lawn clippings for $20 then someone’ll beat it out of them. they may even be reduced to buying coke from some guys who decide they’d rather have money AND an 8ball

    it has been known to happen to dumbass white kids

    • Hey I bet your black, arent you?

      • what does it matter?

        • Oh you know, you said WHITE KIDS and I thought you wanted to have a little racial tension in your life. Doyou really want to know why it matters cause you might not like what I say. It might affend you as a black man.

          • nah…to be honest, i havent said ANYTHING in this conversation before then, so i would appreciate if you did not instantly attack me. Secondly, race isnt the issue here, you’re the one who bought it up. I do find your assumption of Wog being a black person as a negative really really fucking offensive…judging by the way you try to buck to the much more intelligent regulars of this board, i would say you’re any older than 15 yrs. Nice meeting ya, troll.

            P.S- youre wrong. I’m a Black WOMAN. and theres no need for racial tension on this thread. This is a HIPSTER hating site…all other haters go elsewhere.

          • fuck that. I dont lik black people who hate white people or white kids. You guys are so amzing. Pick out the most defenseless whites you know and pick on them casue if they were fighters you wouldnt say shit.

            And this is a racist blog since everyone on here is probably black and your talking about a culture that is primarily white.

            dont talk for other people and if you got a problem with rasism than lock yourself in a closet and stay there

          • Oy….
            I’m not even gonna dignify that with a response. Your ignorance and immaturity is making my head hurt.

          • you couldnt dignify your own exsistence. Your the immature and ignorant person who probably goes on this blog often “hating hipsters”. Youre just a racist black woman arent you. I wont be on here tomarrow or the next day because that would make my hed hurt.

          • nothing makes hipsters feel better than calling people RACIST.

            you’re cute.

          • I could say that about a lot of black people too but I wont. And your man wog got racist first with the white kid comment. And if you dont find that racist then you have diffrerent sensibilities than I.

          • Are you crazy? I hate hipsters and I’m a white woman. I don’t laugh when they get beat, but I still hate them. I also hate the guys with their pants around their knees and I hate rap music. That’s primarily a “black” thing. Am I racist too? I promise you I’m not. Most hipsters are white. Not all, but most. So am I self hating white now? I’m a woman, I’m white, I have friends of all walks of life, I’m educated, I hate hipsters. Explain me.

  4. You’ll probably never read this because you seem like you’re always busy being cool and urban.

    Meanwhile the natives could give a shit about being cool and urban. They are just living their day to day lives like they always have been doing.

    These fucking transplant posers will always be just that.


  5. I just came across your site and was immediately taken back by it and had to laugh of course. I am not a hipster by any means but I do consider myself a modern person. I do not hate a lot of people except your type. You know the ones who shop at walmart and wont eat healthy or be aware of anything eco friendly etc. The ones we have to fly to chicago for a heart transplant becasue you comb your hair but do not take care of your self.

    I know your community in Brooklyn((sp)? sorry in advance for all) is way old like 150 years? Wow. And who do you think these hard working people had to kick out so you could live so modestly? Yes native indians so go fuck your self. New york is the center of the east coast and evey new and exciting thing should be done there. If you dont like it, move back to russia, germany, netherlands etc. And the jews know where they can go, you guys have a whole country now so shut the fuck up. How long ahve you lived here, 100 years? How long was the mohawks in redhook? 1000 years? You move to Minesotta if you want to be fucking city hicks.

    All im saying is things change all the time, people get moved around, nothings perfect but its for the best. So stop whinning, pack your shit, and move to a place where you can afford to live and let us rich white people have our peace as we pave the way for you and your numskull, tv dinner eating meatheads to live in a new world. Theres a reason why we are here and its not because god sent us. Its because we make things better for you. You just do what your told, and never ask questions. Hipsters are doers who change the world. Your jsut a sheep. Trust that as the punks, and scaters were hated and later emulated, your kids will prob be hipsters.

    • Very telling e-mail
      Mike, I can tell from your it that you don’t not know the first thing about NYC. First, there is no Walmart in NYC. So, how would some poor person in NYC with no car be able to shop there. Secondly, the native NYers’ that you mock own most of the real estate in these neighborhoods. Not just Hasid’s but Italians, Greeks, Russians and even your hated black and brown people. So it’s most likely a native NYer that will be collecting the overpriced rent you would pay if you ever moved here. The reason is you are an ignorant rube who the average NYer can spot a mile a way.

      • Ha, what a stupid and typical responce. You have a place where they hate tourists and the people who pay large rents to “real New Yorkers” but then bites the hand that feeds you. Of course they own the property. That doesnt make it ok to think you own NYC. JUst like yor people came and kicked out a bunch of ntives, people are going to do it to you becasue NYC is very important city. People want to live there and travel there. HOw can you not see that? Your fucking economy thrives on that! Its like all the poor and lower middle class peoples want NYC to be this great remarkable place but all you want to do is lift weights and make gay jokes. You guys couldnt do for new york what it has done for you! And I dont have to be from new york to know that. Maybe it wasnt like that in the 30s but it is now.

        The people you hate, you will never understand and they dont give a shit about you becasue you make them sick for so many reasons. They just choose to keep it to themselves. They dont make a blog about it, they made it apart of there lifestyle and ignore you.
        And you know it and it pisses you off becasue they dont want to know you, do they? NO

        And I DONT live in NYC and would never “pay” to live in NY. I dont even care to visit to be honest. And it is so typical to bring up brown or black like im racist becasue all white pople are racist, right. Oh and just swap out walmart for any of the bullshit stores you shop at.

    • Mike, are you related to Steve Lam by any chance? I thought you might be because he’s one dumb fuck just like you.
      Your long winded, moronic diatribes looks much the fecal spew Stevie tends to post under his sockpuppets.

      • Actually no and im not kidding at all. I know you and your diggers like to sit around and crack jokes and laugh it up on the “blog” but I must say, your excellent grammar skills and writing abilities does nothing for your lack of substance. You sound like a hollow shell.

  6. Hipsters are worse than hippies.

  7. Clearly this Mike fag is suffering from AIDS dementia. He’s also British. I can tell by the way he spelled every state’s name wrong. Limey fuckbag.

    • Interesting observation, TH. I was wondering about his anger for the Dutch and other non-anglo white people…
      The Brits are the perfect example of toothless white trash who think they are superior, in fact the British redcoats who invaded during the American Revolution might have been NYC’s first hipsters.
      NYC, went from being a loyalist city, seemingly embracing the Redcoats to the capital of the new Republic of the United States.

      • My anger for the dutch? I just know who lives there and where you people come from. ANd its not Conneticut! YOu came here on ships, your grandfathers and there fathers did so that you guys could sit around and watch tv and make jokes to each other in the freedom of your brownstone.

        • Yes Mike, that’s all we do here in Brooklyn. Just sit around making jokes. You’ve shown that your knowledge of Brooklyn has been gathered primarily from old reruns of the Honeymooners and Welcome Back Kotter.

          • Please, i know backwoods people and I know city cats and they are so similar you wouldnt even know. Democrats,republicans they all believe in the same things. There is only a few people who really push boundries and without hipsters, brooklyn would be a poor place and you know it. So would the lower east side. Im not saying thats ALL people do in brooklyn but the real issue is that you live in a very worldly city. WHy dont you comment on that. You live in a very rich worldly city that will fuck over anybody who comes near it. Let it go homie and try and love your fellow hipsters cause theyre not going anywhere.

    • Triple homicide huh. wow. Geez. What is that, are you gonna…are you gonna….no. Please god know, your gonna watch CSI arent you. Your gonna eat some fried chicken and watch CSI. Please dont. Get out and ride a bike. Try some brocoli or Kale. Please.

  8. I know you guys are trying to maybe joke around but I hate how fucking low middleclass are so stupid sometimes.
    America is a selfish and bitter place. It was founded on this and will continue to be this way. Too bad youre the ones getting fucked over

  9. “I know you guys are trying to maybe joke around but I hate how fucking low middleclass are so stupid sometimes.”

    I think that was a sentence.

    • No its not a sentence, very good! I dont know the difference of sentences to not sometimes. Its a personal statement that I think a lot of hipsters and others wouldnt agree with but I do know the beniffits of riding a bike and eating healthy and keeping my weight down so that im not wearing my own personal gym everywhere I go.

      I may not have the best writing skills but my girlfriends hotter than yours, im healthier than you, and ill probably die wealthier as well. And its not because im white. Its because I expect more from myself.

      • I’m very jealous of your imaginary internet tough guy physique and fantasy riches.
        I’m sure your imaginary internet girlfriend is smoking as well, Mike.

        • Are you cause you got one too homie. and id say yours is on point. this whole blog is on point in that respect but Im not afraid of you or your ideas. Im just really sick of stupid people going around talking about how theyre going to beat up a hipster or do this. Your not going to do shit. And if you did i hope you get arrested of punched out cause you deserve it.

      • May not have the best writing skills? The understatement of the century! A monkey randomly typing on the fucking keyboard can put together a more coherent sentence than you.
        You’re lucky that junkyard of atrophied neurons you call a brain generates enough electricity to move your body around or type on a keyboard!

  10. Hey Mike, is your girl developmentally retarded too?

    Or was she a reading tutor/home attendant that caught the old Florence Nightingale fever?

    • Shes not my “girl” homie. Shes my “girlfriend” and she is probably hotter than your “girl”. Both mentally and physically. At least mentally cause judging by your mentality, your “girls’ probably got some issues.

      • Hey Mike sockpuppet, which “girlfriend” are you talking about? One of the stuffed animals or your bunny rabbit? Yeah, they’re hot in your demented dreams, you sick fuck.
        After reading your last post, I can see why you could never get a degree at a community college. You need smarts to spoke for gooder english!
        Bet you’ll flunk out of the diploma mill too.

        • ok digger. are there a lot of diggers near where you live? Do you live with diggers. Do you even like anyone who is a non digger? Yeah im a math person and I usually dont spend a lot of time writng and chatting it up as I have better and more worthy things to do in my opinion. Writing is a tool for power and accomplishes nothing besides poor communication. You use it to hype yourself up. I dont need it myself. It sounds crazy but im probably on another level then you. And no, I didnt flunk out of my University. Sorry.

          • Naw, you didn’t flunk out. Colleges and universities expect students to have a rudimentary grasp of language and an IQ over 70. Neither of which you seem to possess. You dunce, you never got into college.

          • i probsbly went to a better school than you and had a higher gpa. I bet you never went to college did you?

          • “Writing is a tool for power and accomplishes nothing besides poor communication. You use it to hype yourself up. I dont need it myself. It sounds crazy but im probably on another level then you. And no, I didnt flunk out of my University. Sorry.”

            That first sentence makes no sense whatsoever. Writing causes poor communication? So that’s your excuse for being illiterate? Are you saying I have some kind of power over you?
            Want to brag some more about your mental neuropathy?

            And no, I’m not hyping myself up, I’m cutting a blow hard bully like you down. I don’t really consider myself to be of above average intelligence and I never made any claims about being better than anyone. I can’t really brag because I am more intelligent than you because it really isn’t much of an achievement. Seriously, you’re really not that bright.

            You want to come here bragging how much better you are than us because you have a better DIET??!! No, you don’t impress us with your polished erudition or rapier wit, you don’t score any real debate points but with your DIET?
            What the fuck?!

            Yes sir, you most certainly on another level than me. Please keep taking you medication.

            I think you’re done here. Bye!

          • Yes sir diet. The thing that is making 40 percent of our people obese and your knocking a culture that goes against this? And you dont know shit about commun ication if yo0u think talking or writing is your best way of communicating. And it makes you and everyone else on this blog feel powerful against hipsters becasue they effect you so much everyday with their haircuts and personal opionions. Your a fool and everyone on here is a fool as well. Youre all meathead black whatever who hate anything abstract or white and you feel intimidated against it because they have it so easy and you have it so hard and you try so hard to be normal. get over it and im not done digger.

          • and yes, i can not stress this enough. My diet alone makes me a better person than you on all fronts.

            You afre so fucking stupid to think your lipitor is goping to save you you fuckhead. You are the reason our economy is going to shit becasue half the people in this county is obese or has diabetes or both and no one can pay for it. You just dont fucking get it do you.

          • Yeah thats how i found out about this site from that site.

          • Well then, you should be over there having your sockpuppet conversations. What’s the matter Stevie? Not getting enough attention over there – I knew you’d be back, you silly girl.

          • I dont think people like us hate people like you. Its a little more serious and dramatic. See, when shit goes down, we wont be sitting around laughing over beers. It will be a lot more serious becasue your exsistance is a hell of a lot less important, no one will be laughing

        • why dont you go polish your air force ones digger.

  11. You guys and your fantasy hipster beat off sessions. This site is for losers. Way to post anonymously – you know you’d get your ass kicked by a real New Yorker.

    • Show us how tough you are and disclose your identity, Alfalfa Male. Oh wait, I forgot. We already know.

  12. Hi,

    Such a Nice Story .i am impressed.


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