Today’s hipster beating.
Posted: May 24, 2010 Filed under: Today's hipster beating. 35 Comments »Today, I saw a 95lb gender puzzle dressed like a lumberjack receiving a check from his vapid Daddy from Montana in front of his $3,000 a month loft. So I broke their legs, dipped their heads in a bucket of organic sustainable honey, locked them in Daddys Volvo with a hive of killer bees and pushed the car into the Gowanus Canal. End of Story.
Next time, just shove Daddy into the canal, and watch the gender puzzle starve to death. “I can’t get a job! I have to blog about the art show I crashed last night!”
Doesn’t it seem like hipsters are always waiting to find out if they will be on the list to attend some hip party you have never heard about? (or don’t care about?)
They’re always waiting, and it’s mostly so they can decide that it’s too lame for them to waste their time on. I think they just like making their friends beg.
YOU sir, are divinely inspired!
They probably would actually like the Gowanus Canal part of the beating.
Yep and the organic honey.
I actually imagine that some of these yups like Stevie probably have a dad fetish and a masochistic side and actually someone like that might really enjoy this whole experience. Plus they could blog about it.
However that doesn’t change the fact that this is funny as hell!
Vampira Stevie the Asian she-male is a total masochist which is evident by the continued DH beatdowns he endures on this site from everyone as he continues to post his lame recycled rebuttals knowing what the ultimate outcome will be. He’s been exposed for the pathetic ass-eating zero that he is but just doesn’t go away as he stalks this site and its regulars every second of the day. I think most of these yupster clowns are straight-up testosterone-deficient masochists who crave abuse and an ass-fucking every chance they get. Especially those Asian-wife-fetish guys with the gay nasal lisp – right Matt?
That’s because they never had dads. Only moms.
Seriously, when’s the last time you saw a hipster with any man qualities? I mean, someone who could protect his woman from an attacker?
I can’t go on. You know the rest already.
Funny story: I was riding with my father last week and as we were about to park I was like “Pull up a little further, you’ve got room,” to which he replied “I just don’t wanna hit Josh and his daughter over hea” (there was a yup male standing on the curb waiting to cross with a baby in a sling and a plastic shopping bag hanging from a stick like a cartoon hobo). I have never once mentioned the thing about calling yups “Josh” to my father btw.
Then as we walked away from the car, there was another Grover-bodied gray-haired yup idiot with a hoop earring in each ear and dressed like a 12-year-old pushing a baby carriage next to his fugly yup wife. I motioned toward them and was like “Check this out, they’ve got the act down perfect.” My father was like “Amazin’.. in the middle of the afternoon too..” lol
lol..thats awesome
It’s amazing how even our parents can see the nasaltard in these gentrifying yups and fauxhemians.
And damn!!! Don’t get me started on those fucking hideous skeletor arms….
What happened Sarah J???? Too much human growth hormone,?? steroids??? I told you that shit’ll giive you huge veins like you got now and fucking buzzard arms to boot….
Lookit horseface, spend that dough on your fucking FACE and hooves not your arms…got it???
I wonder where she gets her shoes??
Somebody needs to put that horse to sleep.
She wants to look like Madonna. Has she adopted any turd world babies yet?
NO?
Sorry, forgot! That would mean caring about someone else besides herself. Hipsters never do that.
Ayn Rand wouldn’t approve.
Fucking hippie scum.
Carrie horseface bradshaw, who’s perhaps the inspiration of these yuppie transplants who move into the city expecting to live a life , that they see in the movies.
im suprised she not pulling carriages in the city , since she can easily be mistaken for an underweight horse.
Hahahahhahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
Well it looks like the yups got their way: just got a flyer under my door this morning announcing that the Prospect Park West bike lane is underway and will be completed by July, shutting down an entire lane of traffic on PPW and resulting in the loss of 22 parking spots. But all that really matters is that the tens of thousands of transplanted Joshes and Megans that woke up one day and decided to make their pilgrimage here to Park Slope will now have yet one more way to loll around the neighborhood and kill time between the farmer’s market and jug band practice.
http://www.brooklynpaper.com/stories/33/19/dtg_opedintrobikelane_2010_05_07_bk.html
Fucking disgusting. There must be ways to sabotage these vintage bikerags that will result in injury, harsh inconvenience and mass confusion. I’ve had it with these worthless day-playing transplant scumbags who have gotten their way all their entitled lives and expect and demand our families’ neighborhoods to cater strictly to their asinine and immature brat lifestyles. Glad that crime against these pretentious filthbags seems to be on the rise. I’m almost to the point of paying the neighborhood deviants that I know to start attacking these fucks every which way from bike-jackings to random street beatdowns to flaming roof arrows.
It really is a testament to the sheer worthlessness of these yups’ lives that in the year 2010, with all the unprecedented shit that’s gone on in the past couple years, scores of people losing their jobs, etc., the yups’ number one priority is installing a bicycle lane next to a fucking park full of bicycle lanes. Just mind boggling.
But like you said, and TTR mentioned another time, at the end of the day what it really comes down to is control. When the yups decide they want a new plaything, nothing will stand in their way. Because that’s the way were raised from day one, spoiled brats that they are.
Exactly. An adult spoiled brat getting their way when they should be beaten instead.
“scores of people losing their jobs”
What are you talking about? There are plenty of lucrative creative positions available!
Damn those fuckers deleted my post…..
wherein I urged everyone to block that biklane with their cars and throw rusty nail in there for good measure…
I see your post up there man. That’s so true what you said too, and I’m sitting here laughing my ass off at the fact that with a park that has five fucking sides, the only side that suddenly and urgently required a bike lane was–you guessed it–the side that just happens to be home to the biggest and loudest group of spoiled and transplanted yup inbreds on the entire East Coast. It will be interesting to see whether after this ‘victory’ the yups ever cry for a bike lane on Parkside or Ocean Avenues, where all those non-yup people still live.
They edit me….owch!
The worst part? They won’t even use it, or at least use it often enough to make it worth the while. They won’t be happy until the whole fucking street is taken for cyclists, and then they’ll whine “Well (snort), Portland did a better job of it.”
Glad to see my tax money is going in the “right” direction – rewarding transplanted, leisure class, rent raising, demanding shit-lemming doofuses for raising the cost of living in NYC without actually contributing to the city’s workforce all while attempting to drive out any non-yup robot that doesn’t follow the parade. Thank you!
The George W. Bush era was a disgusting disaster inflicted upon us for 8 miserable years benefiting the corporations and slime of the world – the Giuliani/Bloomberg era is just as fucking sickening as it lingers on and fucks all real NYers.
Dont forget about all of the SEX & THE CITY, FRIENDS, GOSSIP GIRL, LIPSTICK JUNGLE and MTV THE CITY bullshit.
Sometimes I feel that there must have been some sort of mass concerted effort to pussify New York City to the point of no return.
Well sadly their goal has been achieved.
That one was fucking funny!!!
He can’t even hook up with Hipster girls:
I’m in an indie funk gothic band called “the guy from canada who spends all of his time trolling the internet sticking up for hipsters.”
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!
you said anus
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