Oh you zany, nostalgic, Hawaiian egg cream maker you.

Hey! Let’s fly in from Hawaii and make egg creams in Brooklyn! Yeah that’ll help you fit right in and make it seem like gentrification never happened! Thanks to the person from Carroll Gardens who sent me this.

 This guy Petey was born in Maine, went to school in Montana because of a line from a Brad Pitt movie, then went to Hawaii and now has chosen to give Brooklyn a whirl for a little while. He’s going to restore an old pharmacy in Carroll Gardens and call it ‘Farmacy’ of course. Why are all these fucking cocksuckers trying to turn Brooklyn into a farm all of a sudden?

Since Petey has so much time and money on his hands and with the help of the Discovery Channel, he’s dead set on making the best egg cream in Brooklyn as if it’s 1950 and candy stores and soda fountains are all over the place. Yes this self proclaimed egg cream connoisseur actually took a trip to Hinsch’s, an over 60 year old diner in Bay Ridge to “check out the competition“. He shook his head and said ‘it’s not up to par, you gotta be on your A-game even though it’s just an  egg cream. You always gotta make the best egg cream possible.’ Are you fucking kidding me?  How dare you fly in from Hawaii and start judging how an old Brooklyn diner makes their egg creams. Of course he is going to use organic milk in his egg creams. He claims he is opening this store to serve the ‘old residents’ of the neighborhood. HA! What a fucking joke. You mean the handful of old Italians still left? Or the next generation that still lives there and despises most of you yups? Nice try Petey, you just think it’s cool, and nostalgic, and ironic and vintage to re-open an old pharmacy and sell new age organic crap out of it to the yupster crowd.

Ever notice how hipsters and yupsters do the simplest most common things or some idiotic project and need to broadcast their stories to the whole world? And who says they’re narcissistic attention seekers?

Overflow Magazine – Farmacy

Lost City – Farmacy


73 thoughts on “Oh you zany, nostalgic, Hawaiian egg cream maker you.

  1. “I’ll say come on, come on, come on, come on and take it!
    Take another little piece of my heart now, baby.
    Break another little bit of my heart now, darling, yeah,
    Have another little piece of my heart now, baby, yeah.
    You know you got it, child, if it makes you feel good ….”

    —–Janis Joplin

  2. don’t worry, it wont last! this douche will find another place to infest soon enough.

    • Not so sure about that one PP….See, the shitheels in Carroll Gardens will piss themselves for a chance to BUY (at a crazy inflated price) what they think is an authentic piece of brooklyn. They will do anything….ANYTHING to escape their midwestern shitheel lineage……As if drinking down Joshes hideous, fungus egg cream could ever erase:

      1. their childhoods on the pig farm
      3. Presbytarian bake sales
      4. Job’s Daughters
      5. Hay rides
      6. Buckeyes
      7. Ann Arbor art fair
      8. Wall eye fishing
      9. mediocrity
      10. Davey and Golliath watching

      • Heh, us normal, sane, non-pretentious Mid-Westerners don’t want them around either.

        I think that TTR had the right idea a few posts back: send them to Pitcairn Island and let them all eat each other. That way, we’ll all be happy.

      • Davey and Goliath translation:

        Kids, get your parents to open their checkbooks and pay for some scam we’re perpetrating while we pretend to care about some disaster or something (when all we really care about is teaching some poor turd world sops about Jesus and raping their children – it’s not only Catholics you know).

        You will learn a valuable life skill for when you grow up and have to ask your parents to pay for your future in Billyburg-Disneyland.

  3. cant wait til some pissed off native kids pull a “Do the Right Thing” on these fucktards.

  4. I wonder what the markup will be for an ‘organic’ egg cream? Does Ubet make “organic” chocolate syrup? I don’t think I can tell the difference between an eggcream with organic milk and an eggcream with regular milk.

    Watch out Juniors! You will lose business because your charging too little for an eggcream!

    I’ll guess the eggcream will cost $7 at this place.

    While the proprietor is at it he should try to bring back the Ebingers Double Chocolate Cake and Jahn’s Kitchen Sink. Everyone will really love that!

    We need to commoditize more Brooklyn things to generate more revenue and increase our tax base.

    At least the guy is restoring the place, I’ll give him credit for that. I love that old time architecture.

  5. Ever notice how hipsters and yupsters do the simplest most common things or some idiotic project and need to broadcast their stories to the whole world? And who says they’re narcissistic attention seekers?


  6. lmfao @ that “filthy yup bastard” pic..

    This story is just more proof of my theory that Brooklyn has now become the “low drainage point” for all the aimless transient scum of the United States. Whereas 40 years ago this shithead would’ve set his sights on San Francisco, in the year 2010 the only logical conclusion when you’re a rudderless overgrown brat with nothing but time and money on your hands is gentrified Brooklyn, New York. And what better way to “do” Brooklyn than to start selling an overpriced and pretentious version of Brooklyn’s traditional soft drink to a bunch of scumbags who look down on the very Brooklyn people who grew up drinking egg creams. Unreal.

    • And what better way to “do” Brooklyn than to start selling an overpriced and pretentious version of Brooklyn’s traditional soft drink to a bunch of scumbags who look down on the very Brooklyn people who grew up drinking egg creams. Unreal.

      You hit it right on the nose… First of all, half of these fucking hipsters didn’t even know what an eggcream was prior to coming to BK… Now, they’re going to master it? Fucking come’on! This really angers me on so many levels. Firstly, I am an egg-cream connoisseur on every level. I have various degrees of ‘tests’ the perfect egg-cream must pass…. I can’t wait to go check their version of what is supposed to be the best-brooklyn egg-cream out and write a full review on BUWB. There are various points of importance to consider when making the perfect egg-cream. I wonder what their list consists of…

      • Who makes the best egg cream?

        • IMHO, me! – But, since I don’t own a store or a fountain, for that matter… I’m going to have to go with a small shop on Ave A and East 7th in the East Village called Ray’s Candy Shop. — Brooklyn, unfortunately, doesn’t have much happening with respect to a slammin’ egg-cream these days.

          One of my favorite things to do is go to a diner and hope to get the waitress that looks like she’s been working there for 30 years… You know the look when you see it… They’re guaranteed to make you an egg-cream to die for.

      • Kitty Graves, what’s your problem with me? You haven’t ever met me, and you seem to think you have something figured out. What the fuck, why you don’t come introduce yourself, and then commence to talk useless shit, how about an introduction before the ass-reaming.

  7. He wants to market to the long time residents like he cares but he puts down Hinsch’s? People need to stop trying so hard to open up these “nostalgic” places and pretend that the minute they open that they’re instantly “Est. 1950″. As much as I never liked Hinsch’s as a kid, this guy is being a douche bag.

    • I agree with you re: putting down the local businesses that were here first – but in all fairness, Hinch’s makes one of the worst egg-creams around…. It’s actually rather troubling how bad their egg-creams are.

  8. What’s up with Overflow Mag? They try way tooo hard and in the end you can easily tell they are mentally retarded…Also, Megan wrote the article….

    Also, just what kinda wave is this Josh trying to catch?…what is this epicentre he speaks of?

  9. UNFUCKING BELIEVEABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  10. “Freeman, 32, moved into an apartment above the storefront last year from Hawaii. ‘I felt like moving back to the epicenter,’ he says. ‘Getting back into a place where there was a movement happening, that there was, you know, in some ways the beginnings of a wave. You know it’s all about getting in front of a wave, and like once you’re on the wave, you’re too late.’”

    You see, this is exactly what I’m always talking about, and what I can’t comprehend. These yups, as embodied by this useless 32 year old idiot, actually believe that they’re part of some “movement” that’s going on here in gentrified Brooklyn. They honestly believe that being an ugly thirty-something year old reject who dresses like an adolescent and pays $12 for a cup of coffee means something. I mean, where do you even begin with someone like that?

    • I know what you mean.
      Its the exact same thing going on here in Washington DC.
      It is very sickening and disgusting if you ask me.

      There is no movement.

      The only things that are actually moving are the decimal points in the Hasid’s bank account balances.

    • Oh, he’s starting a movement. They’re always starting a movement. He makes sure that he does this in plain sight with an audience, and if you didn’t notice in that movement that he had corn for dinner last night, he’ll be sure to point it out to you.

  11. How is it that 99% of people I know these days are having trouble paying bills. I am talking about friend of mine who are Doctors fresh out of Med School, Lawyers, Wall Street guys also. This guy has enough money to open up something like this in the most expensive city in the world. I am sure he made tons of money based on hardwork alone, not a trust fund.

    • Trust fund ha haha!
      “trust” me, he came to NYC flat broke.
      how he did it– by establishing a relationship with the owner of the building. By sleeping on a fucking matress in the back of the shop. Basically, by living on $5 a day and trying to raise revenue any fucking way he could. “Trust fund?!?” Fuck you!

      • I like how he took advantage of the schizophrenic/bi-polar owner by not paying full rent for the 3 months before he got kicked out of the apartment he was staying in.

  12. Next, go to Philly and tell’em how to make a cheese steak and use organic Cheeze Wiz, New Orleans and tell’em how to make a Po’ boy or beignets, and then you are at it you can tell some grannies down South how to really make biscuits and gravy.

    This is what burns me up so much. These interloper PUNKS are so arrogant and pretentious. I want to vomit.

    • I understand. I had to deal with one of these dolts a little while back, pompously yammering about the superiority of Texas barbecue over Memphis. I’ve lived here for three-quarters of my life, and there’s no way in hell that I’d take Texas beef barbecue over Memphis pork. There’s just no way. Between this and discovering that this twerp’s esteemed dry rubs for ribs were just prepackaged mixes he picked up at the grocery store, I had fun asking him about making his own and watching him panic.

  13. Okay, I have to admit that I’ve never had an egg cream that was worth a damn (c’mon: I’m in Dallas, so it’s to be expected), and I can understand if this guy was doing these up as a hobby, like someone who really understands how to make a good margarita and wants to share with friends. There’s nothing wrong with a hobby, and if it makes him happy, then no big deal. However, the simple fact that he’s trying to make a business out of this, and has no concern over the fact that (a) he’s solely selling to cheap-ass tourists and (b) the damn things are going to cost $8 apiece tells me that this is a hipster game. It’s always fun to start a new business if you don’t have to worry about making a profit or paying the taxes, and I’ll bet you $10 that it’ll be shut down in six months when Daddy cuts off the credit card.

  14. I never had the eggcreams at Hinsch’s, but have been going there since I was a kid.

    anyone remember the Brooklyn Eggcream here in Windsor Terrace back in the 90s? now THAT was a great place.

    • That sounds so familiar but I can’t remember what street it was on.. was it down by Seely?

      • close – it was East 5th and Greenwood Avenue, right by the park.

        they had shakes, burgers, hot dogs, eggcreams, fries, mozzarella sticks, all kinds of stuff like that, PLUS a small arcade room in the back.

        owner was a guy named Ray.

  15. Yikes. Somebody better tell Fox’s to slap an Organic logo on their syrup toot sweet (sic).

    BTW nobody made a better egg cream than my Uncle Jackie in his apartment kitchen at OPky and Surf ave. like 35 fucking years ago.

  16. Organic milk does taste better. That’s the type of milk myself and most of my native Brooklynite friends use at home. Just because we’re from Brooklyn doesn’t mean we want steroids and poisons in our food… Lay off the organic foods already! Hipsters don’t really eat organic anyway, that would require too much thought, it’s more of a yuppie and hippie thing.

    • Organic is the biggest marketing scam….You’re dying face it…you can’t hide from the chemicals its too fucking late….

      Here’s to your cancer! Mmmmmmmmm gooood.

      • I agree with you guys on all organic food except milk. I buy it because it lasts longer… Which I actually find to be quite strange because you would think that non organic milk would last longer.

        But, yeah, organic is a sham except when it for some reason makes milk last longer which is convenient for me.

        • I agree: it’s a classic example of “even a blind pig can find an acorn now and then.” The reason it lasts longer is because the packaging is better. Most grocery store milk goes bad quickly because the dairies use the absolute minimum amount of cardboard or plastic to keep the cartons or jugs from leaking all over the place. In the process, this lets in oxygen, which ultimately causes the milk to go bad. Organic farms are usually a lot further out from main grocery stores, so the packaging has to handle much more jostling: instead of one truck handling all the needs of just one store, you usually have one truck making multiple stops. Hence, the packaging is better and the milk lasts longer. Learn something new every day?

          (Incidentally, just as an aside, whenever you see bread or other packaged goods with a sell-by date, that doesn’t usually mean that it’s gone bad by the date. What it really means is that solvents from the bag ink and the plasticizers from the bag itself are usually at detectable levels by that time. That’s one of the reasons why dollar stores sell expired food: in most states, it’s not illegal to sell food past an expiration date, but most stores clear it out before that time in order to encourage more sales. I used to work in a printshop that specialized in plastic bags for food products of all sorts, and you wouldn’t believe how much goes into making a standard Wonder Bread or tortilla bag that doesn’t leave a chemical taste in the bread.)

          Now, I won’t argue about the taste of organic milk, either, but that honestly depends upon what the cows were eating. Another advantage to organic dairy farms is that they usually have a lot more forage area, meaning that they pick and choose the best grazing in their allotment. You haven’t tasted bitter until you’ve had milk from cows that have so denuded their fields that they’re chewing on pitcher plants (as I ran into once in Florida) or, worse, on ragweed.

        • Yeah I’ve found that the organic apples last longer too for whatever reason. But I can’t stand the taste and stringyness of organic bananas.
          I don’t really have any problem with organic foods, if they are in fact organic. In fact I have no doubt in my mind that they are probably better for you. But the price is too high to afford, quality is usually lower (more bruised and damaged produce in the “organic” section), and there are a lot more companies than you might think taking advantage of this whole organic craze and just marking their regular old mass produced pesticidey food as organic. So just for those reasons alone it’s not really worth buying a bunch of organic food, in my opinion.
          And then there’s the number one reason why I mock the whole food and organic movement. And it has nothing to do with the food itself or even the ideology behind it. It’s because these pretentious nasally fucking retarded fucks all go out of their way to tell me all the time about how much better then me they are because their food is chemical free or free trade or organic or whatever other high horse they ride around on. You know what, FUCK YOU and your over priced bull shit. You really think you’re going to live longer because the share cropper that harvested your bananas got a slightly better wage than the indentured servant who harvested mine? IKJ said it best. We’ve all got way more to worry about then a few pestisides or hormones in our food. And even if we didn’t, we’re born to die anyway. So what difference does it make if you die healthier than I do? You’re still dead muther fucker.

          • Exactly. At the end of the day, what these inbreds eat, drink, wear, read, etc. is just ‘whatever’ to me. I couldn’t care less whether they eat organic tofu or moldy Big Macs. It’s THEM that I hate–them as human beings, their attitudes, their ugly inbred faces and their duck-quack nasally voices. After that everything else is just details.

    • Damn. If it was a vintage toy shop or comic store, they’d have been kicking down the doors and going Romero on the proprietor.

    • I saw Zombieland last night and I couldn’t stop thinking about the hipsters.

      Hipsters are like zombies, and in the movie they feature zombie “kill of the week.” Like “today’s hipster beating”

      Then I saw this posting today and looked the pics on the “Vanishing New York” from your link. It was too funny and surreal. Thanks!

    • Check out the photo of this beyond-typical gentrified-Brooklyn inbred yupster, carrot-topped she-he, decked out in full ten-speed Tour de France garb examining the storefront with great concern. I imagine she/he was planning on grabbing a $12 ‘egg cream’ before pedaling over to Park Slope to while away the rest of his/her Tuesday afternoon. Fucking ridiculous.


  17. Okay, so Brooklyn has wannabe egg cream proprietors, but only in Portland do you find foodies so snobby that they start fights over a pig coming from Iowa. I’m in favor of this, and can’t wait until the Alberta Street contingent starts settling these debates with guns.

    • Ugh. High-end retail = completely useless waste of space for bored rich people to be seen buying boring overpriced shit.

    • Hold up, this is actually, arguably, a good thing, because true Park Slope and Williamsburg hipster-yuppie scum scoff and sneer at stores like Barney’s, which sell stuff that’s expensive but often worth the money because it’s actually nice stuff (like their dress shoes). as opposed to pure overpriced garbage like the stuff that Park Slope/Williamsburg yupsters like to buy. If you doubt what I say just imagine the nuclear reaction that would occur among Park Slope yupster scum if Barney’s Co-op announced that it was opening a store in Park Slope. They would go absolutely fucking ballistic!

      Of course it goes without saying that I would rather have my neighborhood returned to its pre-Wonder Bread Invasion condition more than anything, but if presented with a choice between current-day Shit Slope remaining as it is, or else being converted into Soho East (which would drive the current yupsters out), I’ll take Soho any day.

  18. Listen my friend I am sitting here with two old school folks from this neighborhood, enjoying an egg-cream,. I don’t know who the fuck you think you are, but I would like you to come on down to my Farmacy, yeah that’s with an F mutherfucker, and say half that shiot to my face. Because I may not be from Brooklyn, but I would be glad to school you in how these sorts of things are dealt with around here. Oh yeah, these guys are drinking creams on the house, your punk ass pays double.

    anytime, anywhere I will let you know where I come from.


    • I’ll tell you how you’ll “deal with it” down there in your gentrified shithole of a neighborhood–you’ll get your ass handed to you by an old school dude like me (who’s ironically younger than you) and be on the phone with the police within minutes and a lawyer after that. We all know your type very well, schmuck. A dude like me grew up on these streets before you even knew South Brooklyn existed and before they were safe for pampered shits like you. Keep talkin’.

      • Oh Jeeezus Christ…..here’s another shitheel on the defensive…whining like a bitch trying to do damage control.

        Wow…if your turd water egg creams were all that you wouldn’t be on here trying to talk shit…

        But really Josh, what the fuck to you care?….. Only stupid ass shitheels would go to your spot…and Im 99% sure they will LOVE that spoogey diarrhea you think is an egg cream as much as they do floating round in the Gowanus Canal sewage……You should do very well with people who don’t know the dif.

        But, then again, I could be wrong…hence your eloquent appearance on our site…..


        Your slip is showing bitch…………..

        • Plus:

          “Oh yeah, these guys are drinking creams on the house, your punk ass pays double.”

          Thats a smidge presumptuous don’t ya think?? Why would any normal brooklynite drink *that* dyssentery-ridden bilge?? Let alone PAY for that…..

          • And, “CREAMS”????


            What kinda hideous bacteria slinging shitheel mother fucking cocksitter says CREAMS???

            Why don’t you go drink some CREAM in the toe tapping stall at the bus station…silly, silly rabbit.

            Yep, that foaming jism you got down at Shitheel Corners may (in some cases) look like an EGG CREAM…but that don’t make it a Brooklyn egg cream….you’ll never EVER have the secret ingredient for that…..Brooklyn SOUL…….

            See all the Megan derived phonie pseudo press, all that $$$$, all that cliche bullshit organic roof top beet juice shitheel hype….NOPE….can’t get you the KEY ingredient……

        • First of all, my name is not Josh – do a little bit of research and you will discover two things – 1) my name is not fucking Josh and 2) there is no way this bullshit hater ass blog will do any damage to this place.

          The truth is for the most part I agree with a lot of stuff on your writing, besides the parts where you attack who I am and what I’m about without knowing me. If this was really some hipster bullshit, and I was really a bitch transplant from ohio, there is absolutely no fucking way we would be here. The fact is this has been a neighborhood endeavor from the start, and it is inclusive of all the people from old generations of Italians at the two social clubs, to the newbies y’all hate so much. I really don’t give a fuck what you think, because until any of you has the sack to come introduce yourself – I am not hard to find – then your really just blowing smoke up your own fucking ass. Just wanted to make myself clear.

          • Did *that* little bullshit whine get you any closer to the ingredient you seek???


            Try again Josh….

            Watch out everybody…here comes the:


            Its fittin to land right in the middle of Shitheel Corners:

            “If this was really some hipster bullshit, and I was really a bitch transplant from ohio, there is absolutely no fucking way we would be here.”

            Wrong… YOU ARE A BITCH-ASS TRANSPLANT FROM OHIO….get a grip BACON BOY….That’s the VERY reason you are here…..


            “you attack who I am and what I’m about without knowing me.”

            Oh…but we DO know you Josh…you’re a carbon copy of all the other shitheel transplant Joshes…LOOK at your picture on Gothamist

            YOU ARE INDISTINGUISABLE from the other 2 cocksitters you have posed with.

            “I really don’t give a fuck what you think, because until any of you has the sack to come introduce yourself”

            Uhhhh Yes you do…that’s why you’ve found your way to ME…….Introduce myself???? Pleased to meet you? Josh….now FUCK OFF….

            “there is no way this bullshit hater ass blog will do any damage to this place”

            Exactly…you got a huge pool teeming with hideous shitheel retards down there in Shitheel Corners…who just CREAM in their pants to pay $$$$$$ for the polluted bullshit rabbies foam you call a “CREAM” (ughh)….Naturally you should get some $$$$ for that…after all…some fuckers are selling STD tourist canoe rides in the unflushed toilet known as the Gowanus Canal and making $$$$$$$ behind *that* too…..

            What? You think I would UNDERESTIMATE the gullability of a greedy shitheel???? You think I would minimize the shitheel attraction power of a FUCKING ROOF TOP GARDEN???? and BEET JUICE “CREAMS”?????? Sold in an AUTHENTIC, RENOVATED pharmacy renamed to FARMACY?????? and COMMUNITY interest…plus BACON????????

            Damn that’s funny…..

            How many people of color from the projects do you employ???? Seriously interested….

            So, blah blah blah…LIKE I SAID ABOVE, if you’re all *that* why do you feel the need to justify?

      • All I can say is bring it on mutherfucker. I don’t need any cops or lawyers. You obviously have no fucking clue who your dealing with.

        • lmao, you can talk all you want, but like I said, I know for a fact that if I were to box you out the charges would be filed. The day I meet a yuppie transplant who can put me down I will pack my bags and leave Brooklyn permanently. Never happen in a million years. But if it makes you feel better, the next time I work my heavy bag over I will pretend it’s you.

    • “two old school folks ”

      FOLKS???? Again with the shitheel speak…..

      FUCK YOU

    • http://hyperakt.com/play/?p=1943

      Article written by Megan!!!

      Look at the pics….the place is teeming with shitheels who just CAN’T FUCKING WAIT to pay $$$$$$$$ for that stank turd water fiasco he calls an egg cream!!!!

      Look at those retarded fuckfaces in there sucking down their Beet???? (yep) Egg Creams….

    • That shit is all so fucking out of place.

      Why did these people come to Brooklyn??

  19. Damn what a bunch of pathetic wankers there are on this site! “Oh I’m so cool and cynical and I’m not doing shit myself but watch me throw darts and take the piss out of anyone who is trying to do something…” Yeah, I’m really impressed…

    First off, if you knew shit about that neighborhood, which you obviously don’t, you’d know that building has been shut down and boarded up for over a decade. I guess in your ideal, cool NYC, no one would try to re-open shut down businesses but just let the whole place go to shit so that you can walk through the trash and boarded-up buildings be all “yeah, I’m so cool, this is how Brooklyn should be…”

    And if you knew shit about the building, which obviously you don’t, you’d know that the place was so structurally fucked up that what Peter did was basically the last chance for anything to happen in that building, which has been there for over 100 years (a lot longer than any of you assholes). But I suppose it’s just too hipster/yuppie to fix up old historic buildings; I guess it would be cooler to let it get condemned and replaced with some ugly-ass modern building.

    And if you knew shit about Peter, which obviously you don’t, you’d know that he worked day and night– with the long-time residents of the block, thank you– to make this happen. When I read– “it’ll be shut down in six months when Daddy cuts off the credit card.” That shit totally cracked me up. If you actually knew anything about peter or his family, you’d know how fuckin’ ignorant and hilarious that is.

    And finally, who the fuck gave New York City to you? Last I checked, New York was the place for people to come–from Hawaii, from the midwest if that’s where they’re from, from East Asia and Central America and North Africa and South Shithole, and everywhere else on the planet– to do something with their lives, to make some money or some art or whatever the fuck they want to do. Even you assholes who are all “I’ve lived my whole life in NYC so I can pass judgment on anyone who moves here,” ask your grandparents what hell-hole they moved to NYC to escape. That’s the real city, and not a bunch of head-up-their-assholes who need to bolster their sense of self-worth by shitting on anyone who is trying to create something positive in the city. It’s not even that you’re wrong– you’re just fuckin’ nothing, you’re just totally beside the point.

    And I’m sure you’re going to flame all over this post, but you’re all so totally insignificant that I really couldn’t give a rat’s ass what you think. So save your energy– in fact, go down to Henry St. and get an egg-cream, then maybe we’d have something to talk about.

    • Um, newsflash, Josh, you only THINK you’re creating something positive. You’re not creating ANYTHING positive by charging your over-inflated, gentrified, artisanal, artfully handcrafted, organic prices for your paltry, overrated, microscopic servings of mush. You are no “different” than any of the other douchetards who are exactly like you, doing exactly what you’re doing, who keep blogging about what an “authentic” and “urban” native New Yorker you are after being here for 3 months. Hence all the hostility here, since you can’t seem to figure out for yourself why we hate you.

      Yeah, your place is all-inclusive of all people. Just like you say it is; sure. As long as you’re a “unique” 20-30 y/o thick eyeglass frame(can’t your parents pay for Lasik?)parentally funded beardo adderall popping, plaid wearing, nasal kazoo voiced, cankled snowflake from Wisconnsyloklasota “doing” Brooklyn on your 7-year vacation. It’s either those, or the uptight, self righteous Bugaboo Maclaren stroller mommy army. I guess no one else exists in your carefully-curated, handcrafted, whitebread dream world?

      But still, I gave it a shot. I went there, and that’s what I saw. I left, I will never be back and I post my experience all over all the blogs. So, congratulations, give yourself a pat on the back. You scammed me out of some money, just like you scam all your other patrons.

      So, this is your fucking Epicentre?? Your Movement??? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???!! You make me sick. FUCK OFF.

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